2018. január 31., szerda
Disguised homophobia.
on the last days of 2017 my little brother (he's 7, I'm 20) told me that he was in love with a girl and that he'd told her and she'd run away. I told him that those are things that happen in life and that he mustn't feel too sad about it because there will be other girls that he'll like. I told him that I had many crushes at school and that I now have a boyfriend, and he literally said "that's a bit strange for me but it's okay!", and then we played to collect rocks outside. End of the topic for me! I was content and it had come out naturally.On new years he told me in the table "you have a boyfriend" and his mother (not my mother) got very bitter. She then took me to another room and told me that she wanted to be the one to tell him that I'm gay and introduce him to that side of the world in like 5 more years? She told me that it's something that he can't know just yet and that I must never talk to him about it ever again until "she thinks it's okay".Fuck that. I'm in all my rights to have a boyfriend and my little brother doesn't have to be literally pulled away from knowing that gay people exist (it's not like at his school kids don't make homophobic jokes!). I told her that I felt violated and discriminated once again and she said "I have no problem with gay people... but..... not now, it's not okay now".Sure, it's her child but it's my brother too, and my dad has no fucking problem with him knowing because it's not like kids don't know about those things nowadays, it's not 1970.My dad didn't defend me whatsoever because he's scared of getting dumped again and I just thought "well, I'll just have to accept it. It's her problem, after all".... it was all okay... until fucking today.Tomorrow we're going to the countryside and my dad called me and told me that she wants to come talk to me next to him (my dad) to talk to me once again about it.I'm completely furious. I'm not going to disrespect her nor anything but I'm going to stand by my point and tell her that she's being homophobic even if she says no, that it's discrimination and it's encapsulating a kid from things that are normal. It's basically making homosexuality a thing that's a taboo again.Of course my dad says I'm right, my aunt says I'm right, everybody fucking says I'm right but my dad is the closest person to her and he won't say anything to her about it.
First kiss (kinda)
So my serious gf and I recently broke up after 3 years. I’m still upset and sad about it. But I was telling my best friend since elementary school about it and he just spontaneously kissed me. I was surprised, but I liked it and reciprocated. I’ve never even thought of him like that or ever even thought of a guy in that manner. Now every time I’m around him I get butterflies in my stomach and feel like a giddy schoolgirl, and he’s the same way. Do I pursue this?
Good Gay Movies?
Hey everyone! Can you recommend some good gay movies. I've already seen The Way He Looks, North Sea Texas, Boys, Prayers For Bobby, Pride, Center of My World, and C.R.A.Z.Y, so can anyone recommend any other good titles? Thanks !
What happened after the first date…
So I had a date with a guy like a month ago. We had a drink at a local bar and we went to a restaurant after. We had dinner, a little chit chat, and to me it appeared that the flow of communication went pretty well, there weren’t awkward pauses or anything similar.So after we had our dinner we decided to go back to our cars (we figured that it would be better to have our own car for the ride back home in case the date would end awkwardly… less embarrassment, etc.) So we (awkwardly) shook each others hand. I wanted to go in with a hug but somehow I didn’t perceive a signal from him to be ok with that so I was to shy to go with that. He said that he really liked the date. As I reached home I received a message with him asking if I got home safely and again thanking me for the nice evening and the intention of a next date. I clearly was thrilled and gave a reciprocating response.I decided to not text him for at least 24h since I didn’t want to stress him. The day after I dropped a message asking him on his availability for the upcoming week. It took him nearly 48h to respond even tho he was online. But I was like maybe he is busy with the job, better not text him and wait for his response. So after said time he answered proposing to go to see a movie together. As you can imagine I was so excited and immediately looked up for movies running. I sent him a screenshot of the program asking him what he would like to watch. Since then I did not get any response whatsoever.What should I do? The last contact was like 10th of Jan.sorry for spelling or grammar mistakes
Im tierd of being in the closet
Im 18 now and i know i had doughts about my sexuality since 14 its been rough, i had came out to 2 people yet, but i still feel lonely, im also with a pretty homophobic class, theres not super homophobic but they sure dont care about lgbt discrimination either, there also super right wing and associate the lgbt community with the left and there for hate it, i am also left wing and took quite alot of undeserve shit for it, i wanna be more aggressive towards it, and to stand up for what i believe in, also i need to mention that my bible teacher is also homophobic, and it aslo makes me feel traped i dont know what to do
Gay friends
Am I the only one who finds it hard to make gay friends? There always seems to be an agenda and sadly I find a lot of gay men to be flakey.
Hookup failed to mention that this was his 1st time with a guy (straight curious)
Edit: new title w/ improved TL;DRThis just happened. A week ago responded to a 26 yr old online looking for some fun with someone older. Came off as bottom oriented, at least within our interaction. A few days of email exchanges and then onto sexting, we make our plans... He was very aggressive (without being annoying) in an erotic way about that, which turns me on. Early in the evening the time comes and he flakes due to "family problems"... And then comes the late night booty call. Say I'm too tired to fuck now but he offers multiple times to come over and to suck my dick. I finally say ok.He walks in the door and he's better looking than his pics... Tight bodied, a little nerdy with glasses... Cropped hair, really sexy to me. Aaaand I can see that he has arrived bone hard. And then he says it... He takes off his glasses and is eyeing me with so much lust... But he says "I want to be honest right now, I've never done this before" I say "Really." To which he confirms "yup never been with a man before." He's curious! I kind of stutter. I guess switching gears... Im very caring of first timers. He says he's nervous... And says I am just going to kiss you. We're two feet in the door. Haven't made it to the bedroom yet and he's stripping down to his socks and then starts pulling my clothes off. Great kisser.I grab him by the cock and lead him to the bedroom. He falls on top of me. More kissing and then he tells me to suck his dick. He feeds it to me.... Everything's going great... He gives his very first novice blow job to me and then i slide around him so I can eat his ass. He LOVES it... Followed by my finger... I can tell he did some prepping. Of course he says "Fuck Me!" I play with his hole a lot more and then finally with a condom try entering him. He's not as tight as I expected with my fingers but I was rushing and wasn't hard enough to get in so I pull back to stroke when suddenly he says. "Nope!" "This isn't for me", "this doesn't feel right" I say I'm sorry... He says "not your fault at all" He was *mildly freaking out as he got dressed and I tried to share as confirmation style wisdom.All in all, I guess I let my "all-seeing eye" guard down.TL;DR younger hookup reveals he's not gay. Gets nervous after 30 minutes and bails.Update: He text me apologetically and wants to give it another try. We did have a great connection until he got too nervous. He said he rushed himself into asking to be fucked. And I'm cool with may oral. Should I?
Someone elope with me
I’ve had this totally random thought for years that I would love to just run away with someone, and start our lives over together. There’s something romantic about those stories that you hear, like from my grandparents generation. How people essentially just meet and run away and get married and essentially live happily ever after. Basically that show married at first sight or whatever. I don’t know, ask me whatever you want, I’d love to talk about this idea with anyone. I want to hear your thoughts on it too.
Whats the deal with dudes who hit up anyone anywhere on every dating/hookup site/app?
Like hey, nice dick pic and all, but I'm on here looking for people i can actually get together with, and you're on the other side of the planet, whats the point?
Whats so great about being gay
I literally sucked my best friend's dick today and I don't see what all the hype is about
Had first gay experience... not that great. Now I'm more confused
Az összesítés nem áll rendelkezésre. A bejegyzés megtekintéséhez
kattints ide.
I dated my first male…
Just as my depression was improving a girl caught my eye, we hung out a lot of times over the course of a month before I decided to confess my feelings for her, she said she isn’t ready for dating so I respected that and asked if we could continue our friendship, she agreed then out of no where stopped answering my texts, I saw her during passing times and on instagram she always left me on read, this whole thing made me very very sad, most people would turn to their friends for this right? I shouldn’t have, all of them told me what they thought made her stop talking to me, they listed my biggest insecurities like a bunch of backstabbers, except one friend, he was so kind to me throughout this nightmare. I split off from the rest of that group and talked to him daily. I quickly realized after a month that I loved this boy, not best friend love or brother love, LOVE, I “accidentally” sent some hearts on Instagram to which he responded with more hearts, we started spamming hearts back and forth for an hour or two. I decided to hide an Ily in the hearts so he put “Ilymore” inside his next heart spam, we did this ilymorethan… thing the rest of the night. The day after that I got home and started tinkering with adobe illustrator and made a piece of art asking him to be my first boyfriend. We were taking it slow enjoying each sentence. We were together for a week (the happiest week of my life) when he said that his life was a little cluttered and would like to take a break, I had hope that I could help him with what he’s going through and we would go back to being a couple, today he told me he doesn’t feel comfortable around me.Through all my failures with women I gave up, and tried men, I can’t believe that I have completely messed up with both, maybe I’ll date my toaster, honestly the pain of heart break outweighs the joy
So I just started a subreddit.
It's a subreddit aimed at matching guys who are either from rural communities or are misfits in their own communities. It's about posting the truth of who you are and seeing if you can find someone who might be into who you really are. It's /r/Findyourgay . Maybe?
Shocked
I just heard a song that was very popular in my country and a part of the chorus is "hey fag, what's up? Here is an obituary with your photo on it." The whole song is about a guy who was dating a girl who turned out to be a trans woman and the guy and his friends beat the "gays".
Hot hookup ends abruptly.Turns out he's...
This just happened. A week ago responded to a 26 yr old online looking for some fun with someone older. Came off as bottom oriented, at least within our interaction. A few days of email exchanges and then onto sexting, we make our plans... He was very aggressive (without being annoying) in an erotic way about that, which turns me on. Early in the evening the time comes and he flakes due to "family problems"... And then comes the late night booty call. Say I'm too tired to fuck now but he offers multiple times to come over and to suck my dick. I finally say ok.He walks in the door and he's better looking than his pics... Tight bodied, a little nerdy with glasses... Cropped hair, really sexy to me. Aaaand I can see that he has arrived bone hard. And then he says it... He takes off his glasses and is eyeing me with so much lust... But he says "I want to be honest right now, I've never done this before" I say "Really." To which he confirms "yup never been with a man before." He's curious! I kind of stutter. I guess switching gears... Im very caring of first timers. He says he's nervous... And says I am just going to kiss you. We're two feet in the door. Haven't made it to the bedroom yet and he's stripping down to his socks and then starts pulling my clothes off. Great kisser.I grab him by the cock and lead him to the bedroom. He falls on top of me. More kissing and then he tells me to suck his dick. He feeds it to me.... Everything's going great... He gives his very first novice blow job to me and then i slide around him so I can eat his ass. He LOVES it... Followed by my finger... I can tell he did some prepping. Of course he says "Fuck Me!" I play with his hole a lot more and then finally with a condom try entering him. He's not as tight as I expected with my fingers but I was rushing and wasn't hard enough to get in so I pull back to stroke when suddenly he says. "Nope!" "This isn't for me", "this doesn't feel right" I say I'm sorry... He says "not your fault at all" He was *mildly freaking out as he got dressed and I tried to share as confirmation style wisdom.All in all, I guess I let my "all-seeing eye" guard down.TL;DR younger hookup finally comes over, surprises me with "its my first time". Right as things get extra hot, he bounces, Says "turns out this isn't for me. I am so sorry for wasting your time."
2018. január 30., kedd
I'm proud to be gay
I'm 25 now, and before I used to thought me being gay was just a phase, but every time me trying to get sexually active with women just seem very off to me, I actually feel a connection going on when talking with other men, it's just a different feeling. Recently (probably best part of the post) I went to a strip club with friends, I got with a woman for a dance, she grabbed my hand and let me to play with her clit, I wasn't disgusted but I didn't feel aroused, so I told my friends (again) that yes, I really am gay lol. I'm blessed to have such great supportive friends. That ends my rambling.
I wish guys wouldn't shave body hair.
Shaved bodies are ugly, I understand if you just can't grow it but guys who shave are a huge turn off.
Thanks
So, as I blossom into a guy loving geylord, I just wanna say thanks. I can't be asked to post this on all the different subs I've been reading through but you guys really have made a difference. You've made me realise it's pretty killer being gay, I should be able to find SOMEONE and answered a whole lot of my questions. So yeah - thanks.
Coming out to therapist
Anyone else find this really hard for someone reason? I'm a 19 year old out closeted gay guy I have told very few people about it. The only people that know about it are a few people online and a guy I have been seeingOne of the main reasons I wanted to go into therapy was to become more comfortable with being gay and eventually be out of the closet ( I guess?). Even though logically coming out to a therapist should be easy I find it really hard. For one thing I don't feel comfortable coming out to a male therapist. Maybe this is internalized homophobia on my part but I feel that the fact that I'm gay would make a lot of guys awkward / uncomfortable. Given the fact that he's a therapist this probly isn't true since I'm sure they see all types of people but I just don't feel comfortable coming out to a straight guy.Today I sort of came out to my therapist that I've been seeing for a while now. It was really hard but I know to make progress in therapy I need to be honest and the fact is I want to talk about it. I ended up saying something along the lines of " I'm afraid of being gay" and then she said well are you gay? And I just said idk. And she said do you like men and again I said idk. I know what you are thinking , this dumb to do this with a therapist. But I can't help but feel even in an environment such as therapy I am still being judged. Some subconscious fear in my mind was thinking " what if she doesn't like gay people".So yea my bad for the rant but if coming out to a therapist is this hard I can't imagine how it is to come out to family and stuff. Even after I told my therapist I felt kinda bad afterwards and still do. The best way to describe it is awkward I guess.
I kissed a guy and now I’m questioning my sexuality?
I don’t know where else to post this. Throwaway for reasons, but here it goes:Long story short, I met this guy at a party and we started just talking casually. Eventually we moved to a quieter area and I started to notice just how blatantly this guy was hitting on me. At first I was surprised but then I realised just how turned on I had been the whole time.I’ve always thought myself a straight man, and I still think might, but I was drooling for this guy. He was tall, had the body of a Greek god, had a great voice, great short hair.. I had never looked at a man this way and so I was very confused and intrigued.Anyway after I while we were alone and he slowly pushed me against the wall and started kissing my neck, then French kissed me so good I straight up almost came. I told him I didn’t think I was ready for something like this and he said OK.We eventually just kept talking and in the end he gave me his phone number, leaned in, and whispered into my ear that if I wanted to discover my sexuality I should hit him up.I’m seriously confused as to what to do. I don’t know how to come to terms with the possibility of being gay, but I had never been so turned on in my life.
How to dip my toes in the sand?
Hey y’all, I recently came out to most of my friends as well as my parents and it all went well. I have yet to come out to my roommate who I’m really close with so any advice on that would be great.I’m also wondering any good ways to start meeting other guys or just engaging w the community. Never used a dating app; wouldn’t be opposed but also don’t know where I’m at with that. I go to a large state school in the south, but in a liberal city, so it’s a mix of political vibes.Pretty conservative and “masculine” in taste (not really familiar w all the lingo yet) so just looking for any advice on how to get out there or whatever.Thanks!
I’m extremely sad over my femininity
Well title basically. But I just don’t know how to deal with it. I feel so rejected, even by the whole LGBT community. I have fought with myself/femininity for a long time, but idk how to get over it. When it comes to dating I just don’t wanna try, cause I’m afraid no one will fine that aspect attractive. Now I know some guys do, especially on internet, but irl it’s not happening that at least.I wish I could own it, but when I see every preference for masculinity(which is completely fine, I prefer it to), it makes me jealous and sad that I ain’t. I am starting to bulk up and stuff, but even then my face is feminine and my personality will still be too. Guess this is kinda a rant, but to question, what the heck do I do?
Should relationship be ruined by finance?
I’m a college student and just got into a relationship with his guy lives 70 miles going to another university.He is a freshman, his parents doesn’t give him any money at all. Before we started dating, he mostly stays on campus where everything is already paid for, so he doesn’t have to spend any money.But after we started dating it becomes a problem because he can’t afford taking public transportation to my city. I have to go pick him up every weekend and drive him back ( at least I tried to when my bank account isn’t 0 also) plus paying for his food and movie tickets while his with me.It is very stressful for me because I’m in college too and I’m a senior, i don’t have a lot of time driving back and forth while speeding 70-100$ every weekend.What should I do? Anyone has similar experience?
Does anyone get these kinds of messages on Grindr?
I get messages like this.I don't hide the fact that I'm gay. Everybody knows, but it's not out of the ordinary for someone to call me by my first name, which I don't have on grindr. It's just creepy, especially when the other person doesn't have any information on their profile.Has anyone else had this experience?
I feel so alone
Hi guys im 18 years old and i only came out to 2 people, the first one i came out to is accepting me but he doent really care for it either, every time i wanna talk about my lgbt issues hes like "who cares" its making me feel awful, im starting to feel like no one accualy cares for me or what i think about. I try to talk to him about it but he just said to me that im to emotional i dont know what to do
Blatant homophobic attacks against my good friends
http://ift.tt/2rWeAA2 see this story in 2018 honestly makes me SICK. This couple WAS DENIED the rights to their surrogate daughter just because they are gay?!!! I can't even imagine the struggle that couples like this face daily from the racist/ homophobic right because of their PERSONAL choices, but now they're being institutionally attacked as well. TYLER STEINKAMP AND MICHAEL SANTANA DESERVE EQUAL TREATMENT REGARDLESS. I'd really appreciate it if you tag people you know in this post to spread awareness of the minority oppression that still exists in America. As a white cis male, I am lucky to not face these disgusting issues but I still want to help, we need to help.
Do you think that gay sould be stoped to be used as a curse?
I think it should, it asociate gay with negativity and weeknes. Most peoples first hearing about gays is from this use. And it could impact the way they see gays in a negative way
How come every gay event or establishment I find are 21+
I get it’s because alcohol. But how come their aren’t more for younger people? I’m 19 and I just want to meet some cool people in my area, but I can’t because every establishment I find is a bar. Where are the gay coffee shops? That would be super neat.
Meeting a guy on Craigslist
I met a guy on the "strictly platonic" section of Craigslist the other day. I was expecting maybe a friendship with the possibility of benefits (nothing sexual was in the ad, but that's what I was hoping for.) We exchanged pictures and he thinks I'm really cute, now I think he pretty much just wants sex. Which I'm fine with, but I'm also kind of nervous.
2018. január 29., hétfő
Dream Boy Catcher Followers?
I've been asked by several guys on Hornet to follow their D.B.C. page before dating them. It's very suspicious since to sign up for an account, you'll need to provide your credit card numbers which concern me the most. Does anyone have the same experience on this? It becomes so hard to find a dinner date now :(
PSA if you are here to ask questions, go to askgaybros subreddit!
Better chance of getting your questions asked there as there are more users.
One Month Anniversary, First Boyfriend!
I want to share our getting together story because there needs to be more cute stories on here. It's been a month now since we got together officially, but let me tell you the story of us getting together.I considered myself straight most my life because my very religious family, then considering myself ace for about a year. That all changed when I started having dreams about this guy. We had met on a Discord server with similar interests, and have known eachother for a year and a half now. I remember my dreams every night to every other night and have a log of em. I started to notice he kept appearing in my dreams, and since I considered myself ace I didn't think about it but found it curious. But then I started having dreams of him every night, and started to realize that he made me quite happy. I told him about the dreams and he seemed interested in them. I finally realized that I had a huge crush on him so I told him. He said he had feelings for me somewhat too, then a couple days later we had some pretty big feelings for eachother. We became a couple and ever since I've been way happier and more accepting of myself. He was the one that helped me realize my sexuality and many other things. He has helped me so much and I love him for it. He is really cute in almost everything he does. We've opened up pretty much all the way to eachother about EVERYTHING, including sexual fantasies. We're both anti-social people so socializing for us is difficult. We are a long distance relationship and can't get together until this summer for the first time, and move in together until 2020. But until then things will be great.
Dreaming
I keep having dreams about the straight guy that I am trying to stop having feelings for. It's much harder this way. Anyone have any ideas how to influence what you dream about?
What's the most common misconception of gay people that bothers you the most?
I'm curious what the main pet peeves are in the community. What bothers you the most that other people don't understand about LGBT+ people?
Is he?
So in my band class there’s a boy, and let’s just call him Tom, Tom is a little weird but also really smart, and he gets bullied by his own friends, which is normal, but he doesn’t take it to well and the reason why I say that is he came in one day to class and said “If your my friend your not anymore,” and I asked why and he said “They hurt more than help.” and that scared me almost, I felt so worried, that for the rest of class I couldn’t open my mouth because I was scared it would hurt him, and that same week he came in sat down put his hood over his head and cried, again I felt this feeling of worry. The next day he became almost a zombie, almost as if he was getting dragged through the day, I felt like he was depressed, so I asked him what was wrong wrong and he said “just go, I don’t want to disappoint anybody else.” After that he didn’t say anything to anyone. Fast forward a few weeks to today and he’s happier then ever almost as he just won a gold medal at the Olympics, he we all had are phones out waiting for the teacher when I glanced over at his wallpaper, it was a rainbow flag, I didn’t want to say anything but I felt happy for him and that’s when the thot hit me “is he gay?” I never considered it until now all the signs point to it, he got called gay by his friends so he got rid of his friends, crying and saying he doesn’t want to be a disappointment points to him coming out to his parents and them not excepting him, and him being happy and have the rainbow flag probably means his parents excepted him for who he is all point to him being gay but I don’t know if I’m over analyzing everything, tell me what you think on the situation.
Jealous that my boyfriend has a bigger dick than me?
So recently ive been thinking am I jealous of my boyfriends dick? I'm about average at 6" but he's at least 7.5" and it makes me feel smaller in comparison and I know its not healthy to compare yourself to others but it sometimes makes me feel a bit shit. please advise me on what to do / how to deal with how i'm feeling :))))))
Trying to get on Prep
What's up, guys? I'm at a point where I want to get out and date a little. The HIV rate in my area is, well, it's "god's way of punishing an immoral lifestyle" --- our mayor. Anyway, it's not good.I'd like to get on Prep in addition to traditional methods, but I'm having issues finding a doctor who is willing to prescribe it. I have an appointment tomorrow to get my regular STD/STI test done and I'd like to kill two birds with one stone. This doctor's website says they prescribe it, but others have had the same thing and still refused. I blame HB 1523, but I can't prove it.For those who are on it, can you offer some advice as to how to broach the subject of Prep. Also, how much testing is involved before starting? I've read about kidney panels, liver tests, etc. That's not a problem as much as I want to know how much time I'm gonna be spending in the doctor's office.Thanks!
Alien
Hi, I just wanted to see if others relate. I met this great guy. He just really is so sweet and has so many great attributes. But then fears pop up within me. Like the interest and conversations ended up triggering me and opening a world I didn't know was in my mind.I don't think it's just a gay thing, but I feel I felt alien all my life...like a kind of social abandonment. So I closed off and didn't bother really trying to be human with the other humans. I just assumed I had to be in isolation all my life. So when someone relates to me or expressed concern for me it always hits me like a bunch of bricks....and I either don't believe them or I get emotional about it. And when someone I like, who is human and socially adept returns that like and care it is just the most blissful feeling ever. And with that, fears of being alien come to the surface and can make me irrational at times, that I can't be a part of that world.This fear becomes paralyzing and obsessive and I lose all mental function.
How many of you can't come out and how do you deal with it?
Where I'm from is very homophobic in general. There are lots of people who just want people to be happy and are accepting of differences but then the others still want to have lynch mobs.That aside, my parents are also homophobic which makes things hard knowing they'd really hate me. My older brother knows and I assume my younger does too.I've accepted coming out isn't a possibility but it just doesn't feel fair.
My boyfriend of four months broke up with me this Saturday
I have been fluctuating between quiet hope and immense loud sobbing anguish.I could tell something was off with him, and when I started prying a bit he told me everything. Tears erupted from my eyes the moment I realized what this meant. We had a decent talk. He said that for about a month prior, he hadn't quite been feeling anything for me anymore. He tried to make it work after that, but realized that it was futile. From then on he told me that he'd slowly been acting more distant until he was able to let me go. We had a good talk, reminisced about the good times and both agreed we wanted to remain friends.I'm not sure how I feel about him distancing himself, from me, though. On the one hand, I'm glad he didn't completely break up with me the very instant he stopped feeling in love with me, but on the other hand I feel like he played me a bit by pretending everything was fine while slowly driving me away. Honestly, I still really would prefer to stay with him, but I don't think he agrees.We're going to be having a short talk tomorrow, and I was wondering if any of you guys have any tips on how to handle the issues mentioned, but also how I should be approaching this tricky conversation.Thanks in advance.Edit: This might sound silly, but he was actually my first every boyfriend, and this is obviously my first break-up.
Everyone talks about loving someone who doesn't love you back, but what about being on the opposite end
I've been on a few dates with this guy. Let me just get it out of the way say, he is great. He honestly is everything I wish I had in a boyfriend.But I just don't feel anything for him.It's sad because he's made it clear he really likes me, a lot. And on paper I should have no reason to not like him as well. But I just can't, and I feel really guilty about it. Like this guy has bent over backwards to schedule dates with me, bought me food, introduced me to his friends, we've had really great dates.All this being said, I feel bad for not being able to reciprocate. And I have no idea if I should give it time and see if feelings develop, or try and tell him without both of us feeling shitty?
Is it normal to feel gay at the age of 12?
I am asking this anonaymously btw, i am now 14, i felt this for over than 2 years. Is it normal?
earning money at gay bars
I'm a so called "femboy", how easy it will be for me to earn money hanging out at gay bars by selling out blow jobs and is it a good idea to begin with?what signs of STDs I should be looking out for?
Ways you have surprised your BF
Last week my bf and I decided we needed a little time off from each other (4 months) .... so if all goes to plan, after 3 weeks of no chat, I was going to show up to work and surprise him (and hopefully melt his heart) by giving him Valentine card "BE MINE" .... just got me to thinking, do you guys have stories about how you have surprised your BF in an elaborate/affectionate way?
Okay controversial opinion (I think) but I HATE HATE these shirts
The ones where it's likeI'm gay (crossed out) lesbian (crossed out) Trans (crossed out) A PERSONIt gets on my nerves for some reasonI respect the idea but it just sounds so i dunno dumbI dont hate the thing just grrr it annoys meanyone else on the same boat?
Bad G.B.F.
I’m gay so making guy friends was always hard for me. With the bulling and how guys treated me. The older I got the easier it became to talk to them. Now all I have are guy friends. Their not your basic anti-feelings, jocks. They show me their sensitive side which I love. My two best friends always asks me for advice for the dumbest things but it warm’s my heart knowing they are looking for my opinion. We have a lot of things in common too. They treat me so sweet and nice. They really do care about me and love me (not how I love them) and they show it. What my point is that. Since we got very close Ive fallen for them which is not ok. My two best friends I will protect them from any girl that wants to hurt them and when they do have girlfriends I feel so jealous. I love them their always there when I need them. We tell each other everything. The more I talk to them the bigger my crush gets. It’s to a point that I can physically feel if one of them is in a bad place. With a single facial expression i can read exactly what’s going on. I just don’t know what to do about anything...
2018. január 28., vasárnap
"Impossible" Lovers
Dear Future Self, those who chose to listen and Impossible Lovers, or those who have been told their love is not right,Know you are NEVER alone and that these emotions you feel ARE right. Be as vulnerable as you want to be. Be yourself and speak your mind. So why am I speaking mine?It’s because today I’m not feeling well.Today has been the hardest since I finally dragged myself begging and screaming out of the closet. Tonight I am to go out with friends on what should be an interesting fun and enjoyable night.But why won’t I?It’s simply because I don’t want to. Not because I don’t like the people, location, a great glass of gin or dancing. Under any circumstance on any other day I would love too. But today, instead I want to be vulnerable. Today I want to replace the shots of vodka and gin with cut onions directly under my eyes and weep.Yet why can’t I?Impossible Love.What prompted this letter was “Visions of Gideon” a song from the movie “Call me by your name”. The film explores love between two men and concurrently the limitless effect it has on an individual regardless of gender, type or length. S and I saw this film together, striking us both very hard.The emotional song “Visions of Gideon” plays at the end of the film when (spoiler alert) lover Elio cries over Oliver who has just told him he is getting married to another individual after Elio and Oliver bonded over the summer. This scene personally strikes hard because it is so similar to the situation I found myself in right now and with S, not because of the marriage just purely because our relationship at this moment (maybe forever) cannot extend beyond friends.S is a dear friend, one I know I will never lose and we both at this moment had a unspoken understanding that the situation on screen very closely parallels ours. For me personally I was so deeply moved by the film even hearing the name makes me emotional so one can imagine the effects the song had on me.Why? Because my situation parallels Elio’s in this scene. Perpetually locked in a state of unrequited love for an individual that ultimately is slowly slipping from my grasp and ultimately away from me. Quickly becoming my favourite film and book, I am in love with “Call me by your name”. I feel that my response to the film and love for it is only heightened by my closely empathetic response to it. For me personally my situation varies in two distinct ways from Elio. 1. I will always have S in my life regardless of how and 2. I am struggling to move on.All I see right now is myself stuck within a perpetual oblivion, observing as the person I have fallen in love with inexplicably slips from my fingers as a result of a single sole factor. Age. Because of a gap of 9 years my relationship with the man of my dreams has fallen away.Mind you the situation has ended on the best terms and I am grateful I have such an amazing role model in my life. This letter isn’t to mope or groan about the fact I am in love, instead it is much the opposite. It is instead to celebrate Love and reflect that the definition of Love extends far beyond cultural acceptance. Yes I am emotional and down but I am not seeking sympathy or am I actively wanting people to empathise or show compassion. By all means feel free to do so but the point of this letter is to tell you it will be ok and perhaps most importantly. To love who you love.Tonight I pack up the tissues and sob within the quiet confines of the facade I will once again place over my face. In this moment of momentous anguish I have realised through the last 8 months. Since the moment I first told someone those three words that I for years couldn’t muster the courage to even tell my mirror, through the ups and downs, the bullying, my first relationship and kiss. I never once felt the need to pretend to be happy.Not once since being barred in the closet. Not once since pretending to be ok every day for the first 17 and three quarters of my short insignificant life did I fake being ok. It’s this that catalysed this letter. Know it’s ok. Know you are not wrong to love who you love. Love is love and extends beyond just a relationship status on Facebook. It extends from friend to friend, family to family, brother to sister and of course, star crossed lover to lover.And it is in this understanding of Love and writing this letter that I am able to find comfort. It is in the knowledge that I know I will either move on or our relationship will once again change that I am able to relax and remove that facade once again. And to you, my future self or the reader or impossible lover I say it is possible. To you the reader, know you are to love who you love. Be yourself. Be strong.Be free to love.Kind Regards, G. P.S. you WILL find it
Regarding Surveys
Hello everyone, just a friendly reminder that recently a rule change was put in place stating that surveys are no longer allowed on this subreddit.We used to make exceptions once in a while, but unfortunately the amount of surveys in our modmail has just become too large and we are trying to be as fair as we can.Thank you for understanding!
Help
So last night my boyfriend of four months decided to ignore my texts and calls. At first I thought his phone was dead but later found out he was just ignoring me. After worrying all night and morning I finally heard from him. We talked for awhile on the phone until I decided to go over to his house to talk more. When I got there he was apologetic just saying he was thinking. Then I noticed a hickey on his neck. I found out he was drinking and he says he doesn't know how he got it. He swears it was just him and two female friends and one of their boyfriends. I don't think I want to break up with him but how do I trust him again? Does anyone have advice? Should I stay stay with him? I feel he is being protective of his phone...
I've made great analogies of being a woman and a bottom! 2.0 😃
Az összesítés nem áll rendelkezésre. A bejegyzés megtekintéséhez
kattints ide.
Anyone know of a cost effective good dildo that thrusts and not just vibrates?
I like being hands free or rather not killing my dildoing arm cause its tiring lol
My story (need to get some stuff off my chest (very long))
I've known that I was gay since around 7th grade. My attractions and thoughts... it was very obvious. But I denied it. I remember crying about it and telling my parents, and they dismissed it saying it was a phase and that I was too young to know for sure. I acknowledge that 7th grade may be a bit young, but it never really changed. I never felt that I could fit in. Whenever all the guys talked about girls, I always tried to shift topics or did my best to lie about what I found attractive. I had a close male friend from 6th grade that I started developing feels of attachment for. I was scared and disgusted by these feelings, and I pretty much cut all contacts with him.Some background info. I'm from an Indian family (2nd gen immigrant) in rural Kansas. My dad is a little bit more liberal than my mom, but I thought that if either of them knew the truth, they would hate me. I thought my teachers and friends would hate me. I hate to admit this, but I've always been a "show monkey." I would try to excel in academics to hide the weird lonely self that defined my life after middle school. Those academic awards and accolades were distractions from my true problems. I did well in school and got a full academic ride to college, but in hindsight, none of those things truly made me happy. What does any of that stuff matter if you're tormented about who you are on the inside.In my senior year, there is one episode of high school that stands out. I was on my way back from a volunteering event where everybody decided to talk about relationships and girls. My suppressed feelings flared up. I felt lonely and anxious, hopeless and desperate, broken and deviant. My "phase" in 7th grade was not a phase. I parked by a bridge and wanted to jump off. I thought it would be easy. No more problems, no more self hatred, no more feelings of desperation and loneliness. Then my brother's face flashed in my head. I couldn't do it. I felt ashamed of what I had almost done, and added another level of suppression to myself.In my freshman year of college, I maintained the "straight" act. I hate lying. I hate being disingenuous, but my fear of rejection and some internalized self hatred allowed me to lie. I made two key friends through a preprofessional engineering organization. We will call them "P" and "W." P is a wonderfully creative and kind person. I was an awkward kid in this second level engineering course, and I was especially awkward since I was one year younger than everyone else. There was an empty seat to the left and right of me. I swear, P, seems to know everyone at my school, but she sat two seats to the left of me. One day, she told me to scoot over and become friends. And today, we are the best of friends.There was another program I was part of that tried to integrate unique ways of learning science into freshman curriculum. As part of this program, we had to attend these outside real life "science" events. I went to a "glacier event" hosted by a geologist. It was an outdoors event, and I also decided to sit by myself on the grass. W walked over and recognized me because we had both just been inducted into the preprofessional engineering organization. He initiated the friendship, and to this day, he is still my best friend.Freshman year passed by, and so did sophomore year. W asked to be my roommate for junior year. I was excited. For the first time, I felt like I had a close friend. Someone I could disclose anything to. I did not realize it then, but I was confusing friendship with something else. After sophomore year, I spent the summer on campus working in a lab and taking some classes. I was extremely lonely, and that's when I started having my anxiety attacks. I did not quite understand what was going on. I chalked it up to loneliness. I did not have a roommate, and the only personal interaction I had was in the lab. W was visiting family, and we kept in touch by messaging each other. He would always talk about the girls he was with in China, and I started experiencing those feelings of being "left out." I decided to find my own girl. This decision was the first stupid one in a long line of stupid decisions. I decided to go after P because in my mind, she was the closest female in my life after my mom, so it made sense. I did not actually experience any attraction or romantic feelings. I did do a decent job of lying to myself and creating artificial feelings.Junior year starts, and I become much closer to W. In hindsight, too close. I attributed my feelings of attachment to "strong brotherly friendship," and relative lack of feelings of attachment to P to "typical boyish nervousness." My preprofessional organization decided to host a formal dance as part of its initiation later in the school year. I decided to ask P to the dance (around 3-4 months in advance). Then my goal was to ask her out after that dance. As the semester went by, the sheer proximity that W and I had started taking its toll. I didn't understand why I had certain emotional feelings. Why did I freak out when he talked about living in a house with his dodgeball teammates? Why did I feel nervous when he went to a party? Why did I get angry when he was acting "aloof?" I deep down knew the truth. But I refused to acknowledge it. I wanted to be a "normal" person that my family and community could be proud of.The night of formal arrives. W and I had been elected officers of this organization. After our initiation, the dance began. Around P, I developed an unusual amount of confidence. I don't know where it came from, but I started dancing like crazy (crazy is a good adjective because there was no sensibility to whatever my legs were doing haha). P decided to leave, and I follow her out. I stammered a bunch with my words, but I finally asked her out. She initially said no. Deep down, I was somewhat relieved, but then I was also hurt? In reality, the true rejection came not from P but from myself. The self torment and hatred was from self rejection.After two days is when things started to blow up. I was studying for a 3rd level engineering course when P asked me to walk outside with her. I was rambling about one of my teaching jobs when out of nowhere, she kissed me. I felt nothing. Absolutely nothing. I was mortified. Even though I knew I was attracted to pictures of males, I was comforted by the ambiguity that since I never tried anything with any person, I might actually be straight. I was not. I had to force myself to return the kiss. My anxiety skyrocketed, and I could barely stand on my legs. I told P that it was "first time nerves." That was a lie. I knew why I felt awful. I felt awful because I could not return the feelings that P showed me. That night, I told her that I was not ready for a relationship, and my fear and hatred almost led me to cutting off all my ties with her.In my mental turmoil, I gave myself temporary relief by telling my dad that I was bisexual. Bisexual people are real, and I feel awful for trying to exploit that identity as a platform to "transition" into my true identity. I told my dad that because I was not ready myself to admit who I truly was. Surprisingly, my dad instantly accepted. He said he loved me, and nothing could change that. I then told W, who seemed to be put off, but said it was okay as long as I did not have any attractions to him...I still was not ready to tell the whole truth. I then communicated the "half lie" to P. She was a little taken aback, but deep down, I think she could see the real truth. She is very smart. Then winter break started.Winter break consisted of me studying and preparing for my role as an officer of the engineering organization. I started feeling awful. W snapped at me for asking him to do something for the engineering organization, and he had an offer from another one of his friends to live in a house (the invitation was also extended to me). I was angry and frustrated, to an unusually high degree...an irrational degree. I felt betrayed even though I was not. My anger was unusually sustained, and I needed to tell the truth. My dad and younger brother had gone to visit some family in Florida. I had to stay home because I had some work that needed to be done. My mom stayed with me, and I told her the truth. She cried, but she accepted me. To my incredible surprise, she said she was okay if I chose to "live up North with a special friend." It was an unusual way of putting it, but it's not easy on her. She did not know gay people existed until she left India. Gay people do exist in India, but they are heavily marginalized, and homosexual activity is considered criminal. I felt like a disappointment. I could not have children, and likely my younger brother cannot either. He has some deficits and may require adult assistance when he is an adult (which I will 100% be there for). When my dad got back, I disclosed the whole truth. I have never seen him cry before, but he assured me his love. My mom scheduled an appointment with a local counselor, and I divulged everything. For the first time, I told the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. There was no going back. I called W and told him the truth...the entire painful, awkward truth. I also told him for that reason I could not room with him next year.School started back, and things became awkward and distant. W did not really talk to me like he used to, and I felt awful. I felt abandoned and hopeless. I disclosed to P the whole truth as well. She accepted it, and we fully mended our friendship. It turns out, W had a likely closeted friend back in high school who asked to do some "awkward activity" with him. I reminded him of that friend. That made me feel even worse. On top of the self hatred and loathing, I felt guilty. I felt like I lost a friend. I felt like I used W. I don't know that any of these feelings are rational, but I certainly felt them. That night, I took the can opener from my drawers and cut myself. I placed scars on my upper right arm, chest, and legs. I then took a hot shower to inflict a burning sensation on myself. We ended up having a snow day the next day. I was tormented, and W didn't really sleep that well. My feelings of guilt were still extremely strong. I started behaving very irrationally. I snapped at W. I told him things that I knew would hurt him. I asked him to hit me to fight me. A very damaged version of myself took control. W contacted my dad, and he drove over to campus. After the blow up, we both became calm. He promised to patch things up and restore everything to normal. My dad stayed the night and comforted me.About a week or two afterward, he started acting aloof and distant again. I'm really not sure why. He still is not disclosing anything to me. On top of that, I have been hanging out with another officer and his friend group, and the same feelings of self loathing triggered by the talk of relationships made me feel bad.I've gone to counseling, and it feels like nothing is working. After every "resolution," my feelings of hopelessness and self loathing always flare back up. I lose my sleep and sense of peace. They always say that it gets better, and I'm holding on to that hope. I acknowledge that I'm gay, but I don't think I've come to fully loving and accepting myself. I've inflicted so much unnecessary damage onto myself. My parents showed me unconditional love, which makes me luckier than many. Yet, I still feel bad. So many gay people seem to be so proud and self accepting despite rejection from others. I find that amazing, but it's something that I have no idea how to even approach. I want a future where I can truly love who I am. I really want to be happy and at peace. That's really the only personal goal I have at this point.I apologize for the wall of text. I just wanted to get this out. If you read or skimmed over this, I appreciate your attention. I wish you guys all the best!
Is it wrong that I just want to suck a ton of dicks?
Simple question, I want my mouth full of cock and when its not full I want it to be.
LGBT rights - question
Hey, so I know that consensual homosexual sex is banned in several countries, but does any jurisdiction ban being gay (as in coming out)? I know (most famously) Russia and a couple of other countries have laws limiting free speech (“gay propaganda laws”), but AFAIK they only make it an offence to tell minors that you’re gay. I also know that prior to Lawrence v. Texas, several states allowed you to identify as gay but not to have sex with your gay partner. Is this the same for countries where homosexual sex is prohibited? I would love to hear both de facto and de jure statuses.
Does appearance matter?
OK, this might make me sound superficial, but it's a topic I think about a lot. Do you think it's possible for a very attractive guy to be in a relationship with an average looking guy? I tend to see couples where both partners are of "equal" attractiveness, in the conventional sense of the word, good physique, charming and with mainstream attractive traits. I wonder if it would be possible for an average looking, not rather attractive guy to sustain a long term relationship with a super attractive one. I realise the contradiction in this, acknowledging one's desire for physical beauty in a partner while being not able to provide that yourself. I also have this odd notion that super attractive guys are probably not 'kind' and smart and I wouldn't want to give up those traits for seemingly superficial ones. But if a good looking guy were kind and smart, why would he want to be with me? Any ideas on how to resolve this?
Negative bar experience with ignorant person, but kept my mouth shut. Should I have not?
I feel like shit because I went to a bar last night, BDUBZ, and this guy started talking about how “some gay” was telling him how being gay is genetic, which I personally also believe in a sense but that’s beside the point. He starts ranting about how gays aren’t born that way, says we are mental folks who need some mental help. Then finally directly says gays are mentally ill. I just left, mind you I was really drunk and kept staring at them and they knew and I feel like that’s why they spoke up and further engaged us passively. But I didn’t say anything. I feel like I had some responsibility to say something or stick up for myself but what difference would it have made. I feel like that was an opportunity to inform some ignorant people, but I also would have enjoyed shit talking him. Instead, however, I did nothing and I feel useless.
Bottom Stuff
Hey bottoms What turns you on to think a lot while u get penetrated?Share all gulty thoughts
Coming out?
My parents are extremely religious and openly talk against gays all the time, I just know that their reaction will be bad if I told them I'm gay. Should I tell them, or keep it a secret? Is it worth it?
Bottom
So before I had my very first sex I was always getting aroused imagining being the bottom and generally Al the stuff a bottom does in sex. But when I did for the first time and the second one I felt pain fear anxiety and not much pleasure out of it..I would to try top but it doesn't make me horny enough..do you think it's just a typical think because it's just the beginning and I will get pleasure out of it later or is it something else?Thank you☺
Talking to an Introvert
Okay so I matched with a pretty cool guy on Tinder a while back. He had mentioned to me before we started talking that he’s an introvert. I told him I don’t mind at all, but there have been times where almost 4-5 days will pass before we ever talk to each other. Sometimes I feel like I’m being to intrusive or bothersome. I don’t want to lose him because I really do like him, I can’t really tell if he feels the same way though :/ Maybe I should just be more patient with him and give it time.
I’m having a hard time talking to this really cute boy in my class. But I have no courage to ask him out. Any advice?
I’m 16 and a junior in High School and there’s this really cute boy in my class who i know is gay. And I’m a super shy person with anxiety and depression, so it’s hard for me to get myself out there and be straight up with my feelings. Any advice?
Any guys in London?
I’m a student looking for an older, successful and handsome guy to get to know. I’m 22 years old, white, and 6ft3. I also row for my university so i’m pretty athletic.I’m not looking for romance or sex. I’m looking for an older (27-37yo) ‘big bro’ or ‘dad’ to get to know as a friend, mentor or companion. Ideally we’d meet regularly (at yours or in public) to just hang out, chat about anything, and get to know each-other. If at yours, ideally i’d be naked, and i’m happy to push my limits and try things I haven’t tried before.If you wanna know anything else, or chat and see if we’re on the same page, PM me and let’s talk! ✌🏼
Is referring or describing someone as a femboy offensive?
Just curious if the term femboy is offensive since apparently someone called me out screaming it's offensive. Never heard anybody say it's offensive. I even know some guys that call themselves femboys.
Being rejected
So I am at this university for one semester as an exchange student, which means, I can only stay for one semester and I have to leave the country after.Anyway, I met this really really cute guy and I fell for him immediately. He is the type of guy I have been dreaming about. He said he thinks I am really cute, but he said that he doesn't want anything between us, doesn't even want to meet anymore. It's because I am only here for 4 months and than it would be a hard crash in the end, because we would never see each other again.I just wanted to get this off my chest, because I am feeling really sad right now, especially, because I don't have anybody to talk about this. It is going to be so difficult to forget him and move on. And I don't think I will find anyone I like as much as I liked him, I have been looking for someone for like 2 years now, without any luck.
My first hookup with a guy. Need advice
So I’ve dated girls my whole life and had never really thought about hooking up with guys. Anyways I dated a girl for a year, and we broke up. After we broke up, her best friend who is gay, added me on all my social media’s. He started messaging me and we talked.I got drunk last week and ended up over his house. We made out a lot, and I sucked his dick even more. It was really hot and I enjoyed it a lot. He promised he wouldn’t tell my exNow he’s hanging out with my ex gf all the time and I’m wondering do you think he told her about us? And secondly do you think if we started dating my ex would be mad at both of us?
Advice for a young crush?
Hi. I'm a 14 year old 8th grade boy living in Oregon and for the longest time I thought I was straight. I've had many crushes on girls, but they were never sexual. I hit puberty and developed a crush on a male teacher of mine. This was the first crush I ever had on a male, and it was purely sexual. I got over that but now I have a very big crush on a senior boy at my school, way bigger than the one I had on my teacher. It's not an exaggeration to say that every night I think of him. I would hesitate to even call it a crush as I really, really like him; I think it transcends that. It may sound silly, but I think it's love. I can imagine living my life with him and adopting and growing old together. Thing is, I still don't know if I'm gay, straight, or something in between. I do know, however, that I really like this guy, sexually, too, and more than I've ever liked any girl. I honestly can't tell if he's gay, it's 50/50. I need some advice on what to do. Do I completely ignore this and live my life forever imagining what could have been, or do I tell him how I feel- and, if so, when? Do I flirt with him, and, if so, how? Believe me, I know this sounds really weird. However, the relationship would be legal, gross as that sounds specifying it. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks! PS: Would it be helpful to mention that I solely masturbate to gay porn, never straight? I am also not out and have no intention of changing that anytime soon
What was it like being a gay man/teenager in the 80s?
I randomly just had this question go through my mind and was curious about what it was like. I'm only 17, so growing up in the 2000's with culture now, was pretty accepting in alot of ways in my own experience. the 80's seemed like such a mixed time, (of old thinking and new) so I have just really wondered what was experienced as a lgbt man in that period, first hand. any information would be appreciated.
I don't enjoy having sex with my boyfriend. Need some advice.
My (21M) boyfriend (23M) and I have been in a relationship since about 1 month. We only see each other on weekend although he lives quite close from my apartment because we must pay attention to study. He's nice to me but the problem is that mostly every time we had sex, he's on top and after he "finishes", he doesn't care that I haven't and goes to sleep directly. I really feel uncomfortable, even angry. I think that having sex has to be a mutual enjoyment, right? Do you guys have any advice for this situation because it makes me sometimes really want to break up with him despite his kindness? Have a good day!
2018. január 27., szombat
[Serious] Do you pay much for PrEP and the accompanied services such as testing and stuff? What kind of insurance do you need for PrEP and those services?
I and my buddy are considering going for PrEP now as I and my boyfriend agree to have my buddy as our exclusive fwb, and we are all STD paranoid. My buddy and I have been thinking about this for a while but back then as we had sex exclusively to each other (except for couple months we were on a kinda three way relationship as I was my buddy and his (ex) bf's fwb (he was on PrEP too)) and both of us have been clean and we were afraid that our parents might found out about our affair so we just decided to not take it. Now we are very excited about getting PrEP as my boyfriend personally personally knows some guys working in a sexual health clinic who could pull some strings and make stuff much easier for us. But, the only thing we most concern now is the cost of it, considering that we both are only high school students who don't have much money.Sorry if I made any typo or grammar mistake as I'm a little bit drunk typing this
"Gay" is everything phase
So for some reason i had this phase of me being gay affecting every part of my life. Once i realised being gay is just a part of me and that it does not define me; things simply just got better. Also i learned categorizing my self as gay or letting someone define on the basis of my sexuality is one of the most dangerous things ever.
My damn luck
Statistically speaking, the US has a population of about 319 million. If you take that as a percentage of the world population, it makes 4.5 %. Bulgaria, on the other hand, has a population of 7 million, which makes 0.1% of the world population. And I am, thanks to my fucked up luck, among the 0.1% of screwed up suckers. So nice.
Any advice is very much appreciated
So, I'm going to try and sum this up as much as I can. I've(M23) been in a relationship with my boyfriend(22) for 4.5 years. We've hit a very large rut in our relationship after my depression came back and his anxiety has been horrible the past two years. He wants, at least I think he wants to work on our relationship. The only thing is, I have to lose weight(I'm not obese by any means, just a few extra pounds), and change myself in order for him to have feelings for me again. I miss the way he used to be. He was so caring and loving and the anxiety took that all away from me. We recently had a huge fight where I basically said I need an evening to think about what to do, and on that evening I went on a date with another guy. He was so sweet, something I haven't felt for over 2 years now, and we had a great time. We ended up doing stuff after, only oral, and that night I was honest and mentioned the boyfriend(I told him earlier that I was going through a breakup, because at the time, I thought I was.) and how he wanted to work on things and that I agreed because I didn't want to throw away 4.5 years. I feel like I made the wrong decision and my anxiety has been through the roof. I tried talking to the guy again to try and explain everything in more detail but he basically hates me and has even called the cops because I texted him. I really just want some advice. I want to try and message him again, but I'm worried about what he'll do.
Chubby guys
Okay this is kinda odd. Idk why but i only seem to find chubby guys attractive ( I even prefer smaller d*ck's than larger ones, i am a bottom btw ).. I tried to expand my likings for other type of men, but srsly dosent seem to be working. Is it okay to have a very specific type?
Am I following a trail of breadcrumbs?
I met this really cool guy at a threesome. I'm 18 and he's 26. He asked for my number cause I was hot and we continued a friends with benefits situation between just the two of us. Fast-forward 4 months later and I think I'm starting to like him. Neither of us are ready for a relationship but I really wish he liked me more. He says that he has feelings for me and he acknowledges that I have feelings for him but... he's so hard to read. When we're together, everything is great. However, he doesn't make an effort to text me. I tried messaging him today and he seemed so uninterested so I left him on read. I'm beginning to think he only likes me because I can turn him on and that it isn't going to leave the FWB status. I guess I have some attachment to him because 1. He was the first person to fuck me raw (it was an accident of miscommunication) 2. He was the first guy I actually liked. These feelings aren't deep and I'm only having trouble processing them because they're new.
Being gay and stuff.
So - I don't know what to call this to be honest. But I just wanna get it off my chest. So I met this guy online and we've been talking blah blah. He's great, and I like really like him like a lot. He's made me really happy. I've had growing depression for like 2 years, am on anti depressants, dropped out of school etc. But now that I'm talking to him and it just makes me so happy. On top of that happiness - until now I really was not sure about my sexuality and what was going on. I had tried talking to girls previously and some guys online but he's just like made me realise. I'm gay as shit. It's made me so happy to be with him and I just want to tell everybody. I'm gay, I'm getting back into school, going to the gym, socialising with my friends again. I'm just happy. My only real problem now is that I've got to come out - and who knows how that'll go. My family aren't mega homophobic but I fear they might treat me differently. My sister has a gay friend who they make super welcome and treat him like a family member but I don't know if it will change something.
I'm so glad i told my family that i love men's
Yesterday night I told my whole family that i love men. It was a hard choice to tell them but the reception i got was positive. It's the best thing that ever happen to me.
Being a gay introvert is killing me
Introvert: "A person who is energized by spending time alone".24 year-old guy here. I've been trying to get out of my comfort zone and be social in the last few months. I attended to most of the weekly meetings of my university LGBTQ club yet I struggle terribly to make friends. I'm in friendly terms but definitely not close with people around me at uni. I feel terribly lonely sometimes and I really think that chances of me finding a boyfriend are as low as they can possibly get. I think that straight people don't seem to have such an hard time connecting with people even when they are introverts.I don't really want to go out, drink and party all night, especially not on my own. The problem is that this is seriously preventing me from meeting new people, from making friends and from possibly finding a boyfriend.I'm so sad. I've been in this dark place for probably 10 years now and I don't see my life getting any better in the future.
Dating Tips & Etiquette
I’m only recently out, 30 years old, and grossly inexperienced with dating any sex. Furthermore, I’ve tried NSA hookups a few times and have not enjoyed it. So I prefer dating guys in-person. What are some strategies you use when dating guys but are not interested in moving forward once you meet up?I’ve gotten into awkward positions when I realize I’m not into the guy. Some mistakes I’ve made include not saying anything until the end of a long, two-hour date over dinner, and the date getting upset.In other cases, guys have come on really strong and kind of freaked me out a little (I’m still trying to get comfortable with dating) but I end up just ignoring it, but the dates end up confused when I say I didn’t feel a connection.I don’t expect that you can ever avoid awkwardness, but I’m wondering if I’m not being proactive at managing this and getting myself into these situations. Just want to see what the rest of you guys think.What are some other general tips you have for dating?
Accepting family, but not enough courage to come out. Advice?
So I’m either bi or gay, but I’m not really sure. It seems like I’m only sexually attracted to males, but romantically attracted to both. My mom works with a lot of LGBT people, and tells a bunch of funny stories about them, so I know she’s accepting. My dad voices his beliefs a lot, and he’s repeatedly said that he doesn’t care if someone is gay or not. However, at times he can be very opinionated, and I’m worried that his stance on LGBT people will change if his son falls into one of those categories. I’ve also heard him say that he doesn’t think people can actually be bisexual, but that was over two years ago and his opinions probably have changed. My sister has talked mostly positively about LGBT people in the past, but has said some negative things about them too (such as she would never want to date a bisexual person). She is also in the more popular crowd, so I’m worried that if I come out to her, she won’t want me to come out to my friends because word might get around and it might hurt her popularity (people are a lot less accepting in that crowd). Anyways, I was thinking about coming out to my mom first, but then just never do it when the opportunity arises. Advice? (Sorry for the rambling) (And I want to come out to family first, then friends)
Being religious and Gay
Does anyone here is a proud gay but also religious?I come from a very religious environment and family. I have been brought up as a religious Muslim since I was little and I am now 18 years of age. I have realised that I was gay early in life and dont really face any problem accepting it (which is usually not the case for other people).I love watching RPDR and am not into sports yada yada. Also love watching makeup videos even though I will never wear them (except for concealers). All these stuff makes me happy. But being a muslim also makes me happy. Going to prayers and reading the Quran (I understand quranic arabic) also makes me happy. And throughout my teenage years I have been content with this but lately Iv been annoyed. I really wanna have sex and be in a relationship with someone but I also know that it would just be a guilt trip. I also think its unfair to my partner. can u imagine fucking someone and then they feel guilty afterwards. I dont ever want to make anyone feel like that.So I am here to ask if anyone has this kind of dilemmas too?
Dumb
Is there anybody else that they was so afraid and feeling bad of their gay sexuality that theye almost convinced themselves they are straight? And then had a serious severe problem finding again themselves after a long time of torture? Or am I the dumbest here?😂
Afraid to have sex
Just need some advice. I'm bisexual, I think, or at least I really want to have sex with a man. I keep joining and deleting grindr, making engagements then backing out. I'm really anxious/afraid of having sex with a guy. What if I'm not gay or bi and have sex with a random guy who turns out has something and can't have a relationship! Just afraid to dip my toes in the pool...
FollowUp - He doesn't .i. anymore...
Hi guys, so if you read my threat last week (http://ift.tt/2DHRG4J), then you know about the stuff I've been going through with my boyfriend. It's over now. I got him to finally talk. So after all, he said he loves me, but the sex thing is weird, since he is normally into 'skinny guys', which I'm not, I'm rather muscular (not fat) and I go gymming and care for my appearance. So I decided, I should break up with him, since I shoudln't feel as hell around my partner and it doesn't seem like we were gonna be able to find a solution to the problem.Do you think I did the right thing? It's killing me, I miss him and love him. But I love me, too. Thanks for reading and all your insights!
Gay Love
Do you think two boys can last a loving emotional relationship for a long time? Share your ways of keeping a nice healthy relationship please and give your advice ☺
My fault
My dad told my mom he would file for divorce if she keeps supporting me instead of helping me change. I am ruining my family 😢
Ever wish there was a sub to vent out your gay thoughts?
I'm talking about some place where you could vent about your fantasies and shit.I could write an entire fucking essay about how i'd want a cute nerdy bf and the shit we'd do such as just hugging each-other naked whilst our dicks touch and we both giggle about how cute this would be and we'd also cuddle and fuck hnggggngngng
2018. január 26., péntek
Id like someone to chat with tonight; Seems I wasnt straight after all....
HolaIm a man from Perú. That makes me a latin guy.Anyway, Im 27 years old, slim and arond 1.75mts. I thought I was straight, but recently Ive felt a lot of curiosity towards men.I feel aroused when I look at the ass, and the domination; I picture myself dominating a small, fragile, white guy (with a good bubble ass)This kind of things never aroused me before. It just happened. I still like girls a lot more, but this feels kinda new and thus, interesting.Id like to know more about this, Im not sure If Im truly bisexual, but Im afraid of trying to experiment with guys from my same country; Peru is a conservative country and I wouldnt like my sexuality to be part of my identity, I want to keep it as part of my private life...So , whwere to start?
The Thoughts are BACK
Im a simple guy im older 47yo male. I dont a lot of stupid stuff in my life. Ive turned my back on a relationship where i could have been married and had kids, yes i loved her.I am so confused and so alone and its all caused by myself. I am so scared and always have been to be in a relationship because it puts me in a position of letting my feelings out to somebody else only to be stepped on.Depression oh hell yes we are bed mates. Its bad right now ive been driving for over 2 hours going no where. Ive pulled into restaurants only to pull out because i dont want to deal with even that at this point.The one person i cared for recently decided he was not gay/or bi and has turned his back on me. He was probably correct for doing that.Hurts so dam much, right now. Why the hell do i let myself into this position. Ending it seams so convenient so easy so uncomplicated.
Being Gay in Highschool
Sometimes it feels like nobody actually wants you to be there. The system, the expectations, even the architecture at times feels like it wasn’t designed for you to belong, or at least that’s how it is for me.Maybe I’m seeing it the wrong way but being gay in high school is as alienating as going to a barbecue when you’re a vegetarian (or worse a vegan).I mean sure if you were really desperate you could get all the sexual favors you could ever want but what about people who aren’t exactly looking for that? People always talk about high school romance in all its cringy glory but it’s hard to find a story where a gay couple goes through relatively the same things a straight couple ignoring the closet and painful stereotypes.I think it’s the blatant heteronormativity that’s an issue for me personally, it just makes me feel like I’m not meant to be there. And it’s really only when I am flamboyant in a joking way I get laughs while being able to express myself, it kinda hurts. And I think at the same time that personality kinda makes it so I’m expected to be celibate, unromantic and content with the state I’m in.Maybe I’m wrong, if I am please someone tell me. I don’t really know.
Need Help.
I’ve had a lot of trouble with my love life lately... I feel like I keep exaggerating people’s intentions in my head. So, for example, over the past few days, this person and I have been talking nonstop, and I think at one point he might have hit on me? The thing is though, I’m horrified that I’m overthinking the entire situation and he’s just being a great friend to me... he recently (about a month ago) told me that he thinks he may be bisexual, but there’s a fair chance that he’s not interested in me in that way and he’s just being a good friend to me, and I’m just exaggerating the interactions in my head. Long story short, How do I tell if a guy is actually interested or if he’s just being friendly and I’m overdoing it?
Hi /r/gay, I made a song with my friends reddit about being gay! Gay love is Special
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPZZiRL8yjo
I like men but can't expect it
So I've known for a while that I've liked men but I really can't wrap my head around it. (Idk of this makes any sense) but I'm in like denial whenever I have a "gay" thought I tell my self I don't like it... That I'm staright. Like I'm not homophobic I have alot of gay family and friends that I don't have a problem with, I only have a problem with me being Bi. Is there anything I could do to help speed this process so I can love myself again?
How to seek asylum?
Hello, as the title suggests, I'm thinking of seeking asylum so I will present my case and hope somebody knows how I can do it and CAN I do it, I'll try to give the least information I can to keep my identity private but if you feel like you need more elaboration on a certain point ask in the comments.First of all, I'm 17 years old so I'm considered underage in some countries and legal in others, I live in a country where homosexuality is not accepted yet legal, however, lynching can be a problem.I wanted to seek asylum in Europe mainly because It's closer to me and I just feel like it's for the best now with all the new immigration policies in the US.some of the problems that I feel like I will face is the following: * Denied for living in a country that homosexuality isn't illegal in (gay marriage is illegal by the way), but the main problem is my family, they're EXTREMELY Muslim, there's a 99% chance they will try to kill me if they find out. * I heard some countries ask for evidence of threat, but if I came out to get the evidence, I might not even have the chance to seek asylum, I could be killed right there and then. * I also heard that they ask for evidence on being homosexual which I have no problem doing anything to prove it unless they have some weird system for proof that I couldn't provide.And lastly, I looked into it and tried to do some research but I had trouble understanding most laws and requirements since I'm 17 so I would appreciate elaborated answers, I also plan on posting on r/legaladvice.Thanks in advance.
Matt Fishel - "LGBTQIA (A New Generation)" (Official Video)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQq9f5hNOxE
Confused
Usually when i "get off by myself" i usually image myself as the other guy. But all of a sudden i stop getting off that way nothing seems to work other than pretending i am the bottom getting dominated. I didn't know where to post this so i decided here. Could this be because i jack off to much and can i go back from taking a break. I do not want to be in a relationship where i cant get off to my own man, Advise please and thank you.
does this mean i'm choosing to be gay?
i haven't identified my sexuality yet because i'm still figuring it out but for now i would say 80% preference to men. but if i ever think "what would it be like to be a woman?" i immediately picture myself as a lesbian. WTF???
Does having a waifu make me lesbein?
So... I have an anime waifu and I am a straight female. People have told me that only men or lesbians have waifus but I see nothing wrong with it? People keep asking if I am gay bc I have a waifu but I'm not.I dont think about my waifu or any girls sexually she is just an ani,e character J really like/admire, i've just always though it was normal to have a waifu as a female?So does this make me gay or bi because people keep telling my it is not right?
How do you feel attraction and how do you respond?
Tonight I was hanging with my friend and his roommate and I was balancing the idea of sex in my mind while there. Suddenly I felt this energetic tingle in my groin area and I was suddenly attracted to my friend's roommate. It was very overwhelming, especially from me who does not talk much but instead speaks more by being present in the room with those who are with me. After feeling this, my entire experience there became I needing to be with my friend's roommate.I am new to feeling bodily sensations, feeling attraction to the same sex (I came out last year after a journey (and still going on a journey) of discovering myself). Perhaps through habit of life I make it all harder than it needs to be and I need to surrender fully when this feeling occurs. There are no words to describe it except go for it or resist it. How do you personally feel attraction for a specific person and how do you respond?
Considering dating an ex... It's not as bad as it sounds.
Hi guys! I'm a long time lurker on here. I'm making a throwaway account because I'd be mortified if the guy I'm talking to saw this and identified me. Anyway, I need some advice. I'm 19, about to be 20 in a few months. During my sexual exploration phase, I ended up sleeping with a professor at my college. What can I say, I have a thing for slightly older men (he's 32, not THAT old). We ended up dating for about a month before we both decided that maybe it was inappropriate (among some other problems like sexual incompatibility. I'm a really sexually adventurous bottom and want to explore different things like handcuffs and blindfolds, and he is extremely vanilla and old fashioned) and that maybe it shouldn't continue; however, we remained really good friends, and we still talk frequently. He just asked me to come over and talk, and I decided to say yes. I'm assuming it will be just a friendly chat, but he's sent a few pictures to me that suggest a little more. Nothing nude, just sexually suggestive. So here's my question: is there anything wrong with a 19 year old seeing a 32 year old? I always heard that people that date/have sex with teens usually have issues and are the kind of people you should avoid. I mean I clearly would NOT* date someone who was 15, and that's a smaller age gap than me and the professor have. Am I reading too into things? He was a really great guy and we still get along pretty well, but I'm just worried too many problems will arise because of our differences and one or both of us will end up getting hurt. Part of me wants to let it develop into something more than just a casual chat, but another part of me knows that might not be a good idea. If it's any help, he no longer works for my university. I'm so sorry this has become ramble-y; I tried to keep it as concise as possible. If you've read this far, you have more willpower than I do and thank you so much for the advice you may give me!EDIT: changed "would date a 15 year old" to "would NOT* date a 15 year old." Stay away FBI and Chris Hansen
2018. január 25., csütörtök
Lose virginity or wait even longer for a meaningful experience?
Hi all. I'm going through something and hoping some of you can relate or understand. Let me start by saying I came out last in college and am still not out to current coworkers and people who aren't close friends or relatives. It's not a hugely important to me that people know unless I know them well. Anyway, I've dated occasionally but nothing longer than a few months. I've had the desire for a long long time to have sex, but not a one time hookup. Sex sounds complicated to me. Sometimes the desire and curiosity is so strong I want to meet up on Grindr with a hot guy and just do it. I feel like I'm not like everyone else and am missing out on all the fun. It's the same feeling as being left out of an invite as a kid. When I hear of guys having sex I immediately get this feeling of envy and it almost intensifies the desire. However, I want to do it with a meaningful connection with a guy and haven't found that yet. I can't wait any longer and have tried tinder, bumble, grindr and had good dates but no follow through in some cases. I try to put myself out there and try to take advantage of every social opportunity I can get.Anyway, I'm hoping someone can give me some advice on this. I haven't done much sexaully but have sexted and done all that on grindr without meeting. A lot of guys on there want to fuck, but I don't want a random hookup and feel used/unsatisfied...I somehow feel like my virginity is too important to "throw it away" like that. Does anyone have any feedback? Am I overthinking this? I'm 25 if that adds to anything
What's it like to be a single gay father
I'm very curious what is it like to be a single gay parent. How did you have your babies, by surrogacy or adoption? How did you become a single parent?Because I'm so frustrated about the gay love/relationship. The emotional inferiority makes me never tried any relationship and now I feel I would I will be single forever. But I still want to have a family because I like kids and think I can be a good father. I watched a short documentary about a single gay father and his son's life. I think that would be my life goal although life could become tough. So I am quite curious about it....
Gay dating is the biggest waste of time
I met this guy at university and things were going so well. I'm 18 and he's 37. However, he wanted me to commit after eight days. He asked that I not talk to other guys and I told him I didn't want to do that because we were so new. All of a sudden he starts treating me coldly and only wants pictures of my ass.
Who did you come out too?
I’m a 17 year old boy, and I think I might be gay or bisexual. I’ve kissed a lot of girls before, but sometimes I find myself thinking of kissing a boy. Should I tell anyone, if so who? And do you think it’s just a stage of like experimentation and interest, any advice helpful. Thanks everyone!
Study: Gays are less attractive.
So I was reading this post: http://ift.tt/2Ggj3Rb to say, I'm triggered. He claims that gay men tend to be uglier and shorter in comparison to straight men. Gay women tend to be taller and uglier.1st off, bullshit. 2nd off, gay people have straight people genes, so two hot straight people can have a hot gay child. (That sounds wrong)
Confused
Feeling really confused lately. I’ve been straight all my life and very attracted to women, but recently have been turned on by the thought of doing something with a man. Not sure what these feelings mean. Do you guys have suggestions for how to approach these feelings and figure them out? I know it’s a case-by-case thing in terms of everyone’s experiences, but I’d like to hear your thoughts. Thanks guys.
I can't understand.
I know sex and gender are starting to be seen as two separate things. I also know that some people feel they were born in the "wrong body". But when a guy says they feel like a girl, and vice versa, I can't understand how one can associate their perceived gender with the things that gender typically does. Like if you were born a male but like wearing dresses and makeup, doing girly activities, etc., why do you need to be perceived as a female in order to do those things? Why is your goal to change how people see you rather than learning to accept the body you were born with (and dressing/acting the way you want regardless)? And if I got this all wrong, then how do you separate your perceived gender from the man-made stereotypes of that gender in your mind?Then there are some people who don't conform to any gender, and while this is closer to what I'm getting at, I still can't understand their aversion to referring to themselves as their biological sex. They may see gender and/or sex as a label with all the aforementioned stereotypes attached, but again, gender nor sex should dictate one's activities/behavior. And there are others still who refer to themselves as one of 60+ possible genders, but doesn't anyone else think that's needlessly overcomplicating things?
Strict Bottom?
I identify me as a gay bottom, maybe power bottom. I don't have much experience with gay sex but I was always fantasizing about being the bottom in sex the submissive one and I think this is what I want in sex. In real life I'm not feminine at all quite the opposite. But I am afraid that there is something wrong about me because I don't wanna use my penis so much. sometimes I think I'm just afraid or there is something pshycological behind. Please tell me what you think because it is a big fear of mine.☺
Getting over a straight guy
17m getting over my biggest and first crush for another 17 year old boy. He recently told me he's straight and i told him we need to keep some distance so i can get over him. but i dont want to. I love loving him, but now when i think about him it hurts, knowing that we can never happen.
what’s it like to have a boyfriend?
attention attention! Calling out all the closeted gay teens out there! Well, to be specific, SEMI-closeted is the term I like to use.so here’s me: a 18 year old gay boy who’s out to his sister, her husband, my closest cousin, and my best friend, and a few other friends too (I’m also open in university, I don’t shy away when people ask me and I do tend to let a “YAS QUEEN” loose, time to time) . So here’s my problem:I’ve never had a boyfriend!Of course I have grindr, tinder, bumble, scruff, and Jesus Christ. You name it! I’ve got it all. But lately I’ve been feeling lonely.I fantasize a lot, what it’s like to have a boyfriend. Someone to call “mine.” Someone I can cuddle with and say “hey, love u.” Someone to drink wine with or a beer and just be the most amazing power couple.Basically: SHARE REALLY CUTE BOYFRIEND STORIES I WANT MY HEART TO MELT AND I WANNA CRY TOO.Also share your perfect boyfriend fantasy (for example: one you think about doing with that one boy all the time- remember, keep it PG!) I love hearing these things it’s nice to know other lonely boys, like me exist D: but that’s okay, everything in due time!!!Thanks for reading my post it’s also 5:15 am!
2018. január 24., szerda
Question for the gay community
So one of my college roomates is gay, and his boyfriend (we'll call him Jim) lives in our dorm with him. I came home, and I hear strange noises coming from the back room, but then my gay roommate comes home. I then ask him what's going on back there, and he says "Oh, Jim brought someone home." Is this kind of thing common among gay men?
Coming out
I've been knowingly gay for a few years now and pretty much everyone except my parents know. Theyre hugely conservative and homophobic so what should i do?
What's your opinion on bisexual men?
I'm a bisexual male and just wanna know what gay people think about bi men. Thought this would be fun. Would you date them? Do you have bi friends? Do you think they are just confused or do you support their choice? I'm just curious and just wanna know your opinion (quite bored atm) Shoot!
Advice needed-in love with a coworker
So I’ve been at my job for about a year and a half now and am absolutely in love with a coworker. Its almost like I’m in high school again...I dream about him, think about him all the time, and miss him when I don’t see him during the day, all that creepy stuff. He works in a different department and we don’t speak often, so I honestly don’t even know if he’s gay but I have a good idea he might be. I need advice on what to do next! Should I abandon these feelings and move on because it’s a coworker and potentially a sticky situation? Should I fess up and ask the guy out and just see what happens? My issue isn’t so much the embarrassment if he’s not interested, but if he’s not gay and I “accuse” him of being so, it would create a volatile work environment (we don’t associate with each other often, but he works in IT and we have enough interaction that it would have to be addressed eventually). Thanks everyone!
why i haven't come out as a 20 year old guy
I'm 20 years old and I've never told anyone I'm attracted to guys and I've never done anything romantic with either sex. My life has made it really hard to figure out my sexual preference. I was really late to puberty maybe around 16 and I've always looked 2-3 years younger than I am. Even now I look 17. So although I can confidently say I've always been really good looking, no one my age has thought I'm attractive that I know of and I found myself too mature for anyone younger. Around the same time I hit puberty I got sick with chronic fatigue which I'm still going through today. I'm too sick to go to school, work or socialise. The very few occasions I do socialise I'm doing everything I can not to feel anything because I'm so sick. Which means I'm also not feeling anything sexual.I do watch porn (90% gay) but it's more because of a lack of sexual stimulants in my life. I'm a romantic and I rarely enjoy the vulgar aspects and emotional distance in pornography. I mostly hate straight porn because I find girls acting dominated and unrealistically aroused a turn off. or maybe I don't like it because I'm full on gay. I still don't know.Another major reason I'm still confused is the effect my chronic fatigue has on my brain. When I'm sick I'm not myself. I have a naturally energetic and bubbly personality but when I'm sick I'm a boring, weird shadow of myself. And all my cognitive functions are severely impaired. When I was healthy I was sexually attracted to several guys I knew but at the same time I had crushes on girls. With guys it was sexually stimulating to think about them but with girls it was more about kissing, cuddling, closeness with a little sexual attraction. But it's been so long since I've been attracted to anyone in real life I've forgotten how I feel.I have a really great family and some close friends and I know they would completely accept me (they might even suspect i'm gay anyway) but I haven't told them because I'm still confused and I don't want to tell them until I'm confident myself in my own identity. Plus it has almost zero effect on my life right now since I'm the furthest thing possible from dating and I'm not depressed about it. I've always said to myself "don't stress, just be open minded and honest and I'll figure it out". But it's getting harder not knowing when or if I'll finally be healthy. And if i'm not healthy, I'm not myself enough or smart enough to answer these questions and act on the answers. Just wanted to finally write down my thoughts and story. If you have any advice, questions or anything you want to say please comment.
2018. január 23., kedd
A hook-up > A fuck-buddy > something more?
We first met at a threesome. I didn't really consider him anything special but after we were done, he asked for my number. Well fast-foreward a month and we continued our playing and subtracted the other guy (even though he's the reason we met). We started spending time together and slowly but surely he started breaking down his walls -- talking about how he's in the midst of getting over an ex blah blah blah things I didn't really care about. Fast-foreward another three months, we're still talking and enjoying our time together. We don't even have sex anymore, which is a good thing because before I only saw him as a tool for sex but now we can enjoy our time for hours just watching television or talking or even just making out etc. I slept over his house the other day and it was the first time I slept over anyones house. However, we only ever hang out at his house. He invited me to a Christmas party once but I couldn't go cause I had work. He told me it feels like something and that he has feelings for me -- I told him I'm too good to be a rebound and he needs to figure his shit out before he thinks he can handle a guy like me. Now, he's starting to feel like himself again and doing the things he likes and I think... I might feel something for him as well. I don't like intimacy because It makes me feel weak but he has a way of making it feel good. The problem is: I've been having thoughts of his ex coming back (they broke up 6 months ago); him using me to get over his problems; etc. My normal reaction to these kind of emotions is to ghost (i've done it a lot and I know I've hurt a lot of people) but he gives comfort. I don't wan't a relationship because 1. I've never been in one 2. I don't trust anyone but I really do like this guy. It's only been 4 months (going onto 5) and although that isn't nearly enough time to get to know someone -- we.... mesh well together. We're both still on Grindr talking to other guys but there is a connection.
I Slept With My Coach, Now What!? [18+]
I need some advice. First of, let me start off by saying everyone in this event including myself are 18 years old or older.So I play softball recreationally. A sport I picked up while living on my own in Northern California. Anyway, about a year ago, I decided to move back to LA to be with family.I decided to check out and join the gay softball league to make friends.Huge success!Anyway, I see this coach who Is a bit older than me (I'm in my early 30's, he's mid 40s). I thought he was very handsome hairy guy, but definitely intimidated me. I have a few run inns with him, where he waves or tries to say "Hi", but I'm usually oblivious, so he makes it more obvious. I start saying "hi". At this point, I don't know the guy, just know he's a coach from another team.We'll the season ends and my team breaks up. I'm a little sad, start trying out for new teams, and on my way out of one of the tryouts I look at one of my hook up apps And notice that the hot coach I had checked me out.He keeps doing it for about a week and one of those drunken bar nights I say "Hi". We talk online and after a couple of hours of messaging, he send me a pic of his manhood (it was impressive) and invites me over. I Ubered over there it was fun, but ended quicker than I would have liked.Anyway, that was that for me, or so I thought. We didn't really talk. Then a tournament was coming up And I wanted to play. So when I saw a post about a team needing players I volunteered. Didn't know what team until I showed up at the practice and it was the coaches team I hooked up with.We both pretended like nothing happened and just practiced. Really enjoyed the practice and became quick friends with a young, cute 22 year old. He's a really nice guy and we've become good friends. A few weeks later, I find out that him and the coach use to date when he was 18. The worst part is that this young guy is still in love with the coach and possessive of him.We went to the tournament, where I find the coach trying to convince me to play with him full time. He really needed someone like me who knows how to play the game and call the plays. Most of the people on this team are pretty green. And to be honest, I needed a team. So, I caved and joined the team full time.Now the young guy and I are good friends and I'm afraid that he'll find out that I hooked up with the coach. Should I tell him? Wouldn't it be worse if he find out later? Or should I just let it be?
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