Gay dating now seems like a Catch-22

So over the past 12 years or so I feel like the more experience I get at gay dating the harder it becomes to do it successfully. In my experience it seems like a Catch-22 formulates and with each subsequent new person to date the choice becomes increasingly difficult.What is the Catch-22 you ask? I find that if you are attracted to a guy and would like to ask him out that if you show this kind of interest, the other party treats it like you've given up your power. By this I mean they now know you're interested and therefore there's no challenge for them (damn hunter instincts) and so they act very passively because if they show excitement back they've given up their power in return which they have 0 incentive to do. If you as the asker show any further excitement or interest in the date, then you become even less of accomplishment to secure a future relationship with and even risk turning the guy off.If on the other hand you remain at just the stage of asking someone out but show no further push to get together, then the other person feels like they have to do nothing either because you're the one that asked them out and if you don't push to get it done then you must not actually be genuinely interested in putting the effort into dating them.TLDR: If you ask a guy out, he feels like you should do all the work. If you seem excited about going out, the other guy will find you less attractive. If you don't seem excited about going out, then the other guy assumes you're not really interested.