How do you learn to love yourself?

Hey /r/gayI've re-written this post about a dozen times because I really don't know how to start this post. So I'll just say off the bat if you're taking the time to read this, thank you. This post inst directly about being gay, but i'm sorta desperate and don't know where else to post. Warning: this will be long :/I hate myself, but not for the reason you think. I don't hate that I'm gay. I hate myself for everything else that is essentially "me."I have always been "the dork". Nerdy, geeky, awkward, shy, quiet, somewhat smart but not very bold. The nervous one. And it doesn't help my body kind of fits the stereotype too: unattractive, bone-skinny, pale, acne-ridden, glasses, bad haircut, virgin, the whole works. It didn't bother me when I was younger. But as I grew older and was in high school, as I grew to have feelings for other people, I began to hate myself more and more.I was angry . Angry with myself. Angry that my body wasn't like football jocks. Angry I didn't find MTV all that funny. Angry I couldn't connect with peers. Angry that I didn't like sports. Angry I wasn't attractive. Angry I had to be the one with the genetics that made me skinny and acne-prone. Angry that I was a better student then anything else in my life. Angry I was a stereotypical awkward nerd. And this anger, this self hatred, destroyed any self confidence or image I had of myself, any ambition or interests I had, and left me insecure, reclusive, unhappy, which just made my situation worse.I tried to "fix" myself in several ways, everything from working out and a new diet to fix my body, spending more money on "stylish" clothes and better haircuts to fix my "attractiveness", faking interest in sports and failing classes and going out getting drunk partying to "fit-in", getting contacts and acne-cream, etc. But it hasn't worked. It has only distracted me from the true problem: my self image. In the end, I still hate myself for the same reasons.Now that I've graduated high school and am about to start college, I'm looking back and I'm starting to realize that I don't think this stems from myself. I didn't hate myself when I was younger. Instead, I think I grew into this; I think that I was taught to feel and think this way about myself, that this mentality was beaten into me externally.The three people, or groups, that come to mind are 1.) bullies 2.) family and 3.) ex crushes.I've been bullied all my life. :/ I've been bullied because people assumed I was a "faggot" not because I was openly gay but because I was the weak nerdy type. I don't think this would have changed whether I was gay or not. People have always just seen me as an easy target because I was always too afraid to stand up for myself, and it was fun and easy to mess with me.My family has always been kind of rough towards me too. I love them: they have nurtured me and kept me safe. But they, too, have never really like who I was. My mom would always tell me how weak I was, she would always get angry with me because I didn't do sports and call me "faggot" for it as well. My parents always compared me with their coworkers and friends, and would always say how pathetic I was I couldn't make friends and that I just spent all my time on the computer or playing video games. They would get mad at me when I didn't want to have big birthday parties, or wouldn't bring friends over; that I had needed glasses or I had acne break out or that I could never seem to gain weight. They tell me not to like certain things like anime or stuff because they say it makes me a "faggot". They adore my younger brother, who is not only athletic, but also isn't skinny, doesn't need glasses, and doesn't have acne. They always are comparing me with him.Finally, a lot of my crushes on other gay guys have just ended in rejection. Whether directly or indirectly, they've all just told me I'm too unappealing to them, or "not their type." But it was always usually had something with me not being the hot jock type. While I don't hate them for it, and understand this is how the dating game works, it does eventually make you start to feel there is something wrong with yourself rather, as its more likely that then "oh, all those guys are just jerks."Honestly, I'm disheartened and defeated. I'm really, really trying to love myself. I don't think I'm that bad a person. But when I even have a glimmer of self-respect or self love, I end up just dragging myself back down again.Anyway sorry for that long post. What I'm here to ask you today is two things.1.) Did any of you have similar experiences?2.) How do I learn to love myself?Thanks again to all those who have taken the time to read this.