Need Some Help [Not Joking] [NSFW]

I don't know how to ask this without sounding like a troll, so I'll just do it. This is my first post on Reddit, so sorry if I don't understand how this all works.I am a 20 year old gay man, and to put it simply, I have a real need to suck cock - like the need is so bad it's literally unbearable and I just want to ask every guy I see if I can suck them off.I am a virgin, but the thing is that I don't want to suck truly random cock off of Grindr or something - I fear they could have STD's or HIV or something. I don't have to suck a boyfriend (I would if I did, but I don't lol) - it could just be a friend who I trusted to be disease-free.What do I do? The urge is getting so bad I feel like punching myself hard in the face or thigh to calm myself down - like I truly want to actually hurt myself to make it stop, not methaphorically. My mind is always on cock, always on cum. I really need help - I feel like I am going crazy. I actually want to harm myself because of this.Please. What do I do to either find a disease-free cock to suck or to find a way to not have this raw urge to suck anymore?