2016. április 30., szombat
I am scared and could need some kind words, help or advice.
So. I am 22 years old and... I don't feel like I fit in the heterosexuality for a few years now. I feel like... well, not really bisexual. I looked it up what could fit best for me and found Demisexuality(Explanation: Someone who identifies as Demisexual, does not experience sexual attraction until they form a strong emotional connection with someone. While this can occur in a romantic relationship, this is not always the case.In general, demisexuals are not sexually attracted to anyone of any gender, unless an emotional connected to someone else, when they ma experiences sexual attraction and desire, but only towards the specific partner/s.This doesn't mean that someone who is Demisexual will not have sex, however, as sexual attraction does not equal the desire for sex. )But with about 19 years I also found out that I don't really feel like a normal male sometimes. Best guess would be that I feel genderfluid.The thing that scares me right now is, that I think about my sexuality really much the last few weeks. And I really don't know how I should deal with it.Every kind of help or any kind of advice will be appreciated. Thank you.This is not a throwaway. If friends of mine read this. Feel free to talk to me about it or don't bother me with hate.
depressed the only girl I've ever loved came out to me...
We spoke all night... From right after work until midnight... I'm a straight guy, in love with my friend who came out... she came out to me tonight after 11 years..... and I'm still in love with her... I'm broken, and relieved, and happy for her, but I feel so empty and hopeless now...I met her 11 years ago, at a conservative Christian youth group... We quickly became friends, then hung out exclusively... Sometimes she was distant, sometimes close... But we were never physical... I wasn't ever wanting to push because of some abuse she mentioned when she was a kid... I just wanted her to fully trust me and never asked for a thing.We ended up going to a Christian ministry school together... Lots of complicated messes happened in the last 11 years... But we always found each other and confided in each other... And I suspected she was gay... Or asexual, or just being conservative because of ministry school... But it didn't then matter why we weren't physical and doesn't matter to me now that I know.. I loved her... I want to be there for her.The thing is, she didn't know she was, and wasn't able to explore her sexuality because of religion... And it wasn't until recently that she felt the chance to truly be herself and explore her sexuality.. The story is far more complicated... And I wish I had someone to talk to... I just need to vent and collect my thoughts...I am pro lgbt and know it's not a choice.. But I don't know how to let go... I love her and it hurts my heart so much to finally know the reason we never became anything more than good friends..I want her in my life.. I'd do anything for her.. but I know if I continue being her friend I'll never look for a straight girl for myself.. I don't know how to not be in love with my gay friend..
URGENT CALL: How to get parents understand their son's (my boyfriend's) sexual orientation?
He just called me sobbing and telling me there was no point in us being together anymore. Of course I asked him why he was saying such a thing -- we hadn't had a fight or anything. I was just planning on crashing at his place just now, a Saturday afternoon, no big deal. Apparently, he told his mother "a friend" would go visit, but they had a fight. It's a tense relationship, since his family (and he himself) belongs to a Christian church and the discourse on LGBT people is quite harsh. They've even got my boyfriend treated with one of those conversion therapies you hear; they pretend his son is "cured", but of course that's not the case. He called me because he was desperate, because he's tired of feeling trapped, jailed, punished for no reason than being himself. He told me not to go, not to crash at his place... there was no point in all that, in us, in having fun together, in enjoying life the way we've been doing it lately. It absolutely broke my heart. I was helpless and deeply hurt by the way someone so close to my boyfriend could possibly be hurting him so much. Of course you'd say he just gotta stand up and come out, but he's a freshman and his family is in charge of all the expenses -- contemporary tragedy of us. His dad has previously thrown him out of their house. You can feel the tension, anxiety and desperation in his voice. Sadly, there's not much I can do to help. I myself have been through my own hell and I'm trying to get a stable job. But I wanna help him out. I've told him there might be two solutions: come out (again!) and tell them he's got a boyfriend (yeah, they have no clue) under the risk of being thrown away or just keep quiet, playing along, abide by their rules and just wait until the moment he can emancipate. Both paths are gonna hurt, I told him, but whatever happens, I AM going to be his one and only man, no matter what, even if he has to stay home all week and that way confirm he has no friends (he's not a people person). I can't tell you how deeply affected I am with all of this. Though I try to be a sensible person, I can't help thinking this wouldn't be an issue if people would at least be more compassionate, loving and caring. Because deep down it's not a matter of being Christian (my Christian mother and Christian friends all accept me the way I am), it's about being human. Should I talk to their parents? Should my mother talk to them? (I'm.positive she would if I asked her to). Should I get professional (sensible) help? Is this a case of psychological abuse? I love him, and I don't want him to cry anymore.
My stupid reason for not coming out.
I'm 19 years old living away from home and I have some irrational fears about coming out that make it hard to even try.My uncle came out about a year ago (He's in his 30's) and I fear that because me and my uncle both continued into university level education that my family will draw parallels.I fear coming out to my friends because they will think I'm joking or they will liken me to there gay friends.I just have a fear that no one will take me seriously and I'll end up looking stupid or even worse I come out and people accept me for me to suddenly find out I was straight this whole time.I really don't know what to do. I want to feel accepted. I've never been in a relationship and I feel that this also keeps me from admitting it.
Rare Masc4fems
I noticed that it's pretty rare to see masculine guys go for feminine guys. I don't even know if there are still guys out there like that. I'm a pretty feminine guy myself and it's pretty common to see things like masc4masc. I know it may be a pretty stupid observation but I just want to know what do you guys think? Are there still masc guys that look into fem guys?
Any advice about sort-of rejection?
Ok, so basically I met this guy that I have always sort of like a while ago now, and he doesn't know I am gay ( I have told quite a lot of friends though now). We get on quite well, and recently we have been seeing quite a bit more of each other. In this time, he has been acting more affectionate around me (you know, more touching in a somewhat 'I like you' way) and even though I know it is wrong to stereotype, he seems... quite gay. However, I basically have seen through the joy of social media that he is now going out with this girl that he met about a year ago, even though he has not officially said anything about it. I sort of did feel at the time like he was leading me on to something, and I, as a first year student at Uni was hoping that after the exams this summer that I might advance with him. I feel pretty gutted about it now and just really depressed and I don't really want to talk to many of my friends about it, as I feel they might just say: 'move on' or 'get over it' as it didn't ever become a relationship. If anyone has sort of any advice about how to overcome these annoying depressed feelings from a situation like this, it would be much appreciated.
Do I wait or continue on
Hi guys, so recently before I made a post about this guy that I liked that got deployed. But now I'm not sure if I should continue waiting for him since my crush went away and it doesn't feel the same anymore. We were never in a relationship it's just I don't want to be a dick about it. What should I do?
???
hey you guys i cant fantasize sexually about girls i try to imagine them naked e touching them is that gay? When imagine dudes it get hard. yesterday my instructor gave me test and when he left i was thinking a lot about him riding my dick. please dont assholes this sounds pretty gay to me but is it possible im just aroused at the taboo nature of this or ive trained myself?
2016. április 29., péntek
Drunk and NEW
So long time fan of the sub. I broke up w/ my ex-gf like a month ago. Was a nice relationship just didn't work out.Maybe this should go in /r/bisexualAnyway.I'm 38, trying so hard to come to grips with my bi-gay sexuality. Saying that, I am horrified about hitting the local gay club.Being open minded my life, I had lots of gay friends and in college use to visit this club often as the DD and "oh lol he's the straight friend" kinda guyGuess now I'm trying to "open up".. I feel weird on SO many levels.I'm not young, this is a college town. I'm fat lol, aka a BEAR, so 2nd hit and 3rd I'm old... 38 :(Just not sure what to do. Odd thing is, due to my age, I can be more free... no marriage/kids/family, and old enough where well I tried but never hit the mark.So can really try new things.To add more complication, even if a bear. I'm strictly a TOP... I don't mind trying bottom, but I have 0 desire to suck dick. So that makes me feel horrible :(I'd MUCH rather attempt anal than even put a dick near my mouth. So makes me question myself.Fuck... help please ;)
Will I ever find love?
So, a few things. I'm 28. Black. Tall. A little on the bigger side - but usually not big enough to even be considered a bear. Probably a cub. And yes, I know that I could stand to lose weight to appeal to more guys - yada, yada. I also know that there are guys, big and small, who like (or at least don't mind) men my size.I've never had a real relationship before. There doesn't seem to be anything I can do to meet someone or turn a dating situation into a legitimate romantic relationship. Are there any dating coaches out there who can help me? ☹️
I am jealous of people with awesome beard, but I am also attracted to them.
Pretty sure this is a gay problem.Side question, at what age do you think a men's beard matures? People keep asking me to wait but I feel that my time is pretty much up (20 years old).
Can't form relationships with straight men...
Hi. I'm a gay man and I've found that for most of my life I've never been able to form a close relationship with any straight men. I notice a lot of gay men are friends with straight guys but for some reason I've never been able to form those relationships. I was bullied in school and I suppose that's when I started making friends with girls. I don't consciously dislike straight men and I've tried to get to know some but something just always feels off. I suppose this might stem from a subconscious fear of social rejection which I experienced a lot as a child due to my "flamboyant" nature. What am I doing wrong? Is this normal? How can I fix this shit. I don't hate straight men and I'd love to get close with them I just don't know how. Tired of feeling like an outsider everywhere I go...
2016. április 28., csütörtök
Why I'm scared to say, "I love you."
Hi everyone! I'll keep this as short as possible. So, I met this guy when I was a student at university. He works there (not a professor), I was a senior when I first met him. Funny because we met through Grindr about a year ago, and I thought, "Oh, God. Another guy asking me XX things." But we actually ended up having a nice chat about life. And while I was taking the train home, he noticed me and struck up a conversation and began commuting together.We never hooked up. It was purely platonic friendship, and I think it was because I didn't know what I wanted then. We grabbed drinks on campus every now and then, etc. Close to graduation, we stopped chatting for awhile, partly because I was so consumed with finals and finishing my year strong. I stopped dating altogether as well, and just put that on the back-burner.Once I graduated and started working, I began thinking of him. It was strange because I didn't think of him in a romantic way before, but I just allowed myself to feel romantic and attracted to him. We get along really well, we finish each other's sentences and laugh really hard, I understand and respect each other's perspective, we vent to each other, etc. We began chatting again and decided to catch up a couple months ago. We've been seeing each other at least once a week when our busy schedule opens up, we text each other every day to see how our day is going, and we call each other.We've gone on several dates and I was so nervous to kiss him. But I wanted to so badly. It's weird because I typically don't get scared about that stuff, but MAN...I was nervous. I'd get hard instantly, my speech was rapid because I talk a lot when I get nervous, and I would stop myself from doing it. Eventually, he ended up kissing me, and it was just great. We haven't done anything more, and I like how it's going. I respect him and I don't expect sex at all. We don't feel pressure to put a label on our relationship.I'm pretty sure I love him. I don't think I've felt this way before. Whenever I don't hear back from him, I get annoyed/worried, and I'm always doing things to keep myself busy from getting too idealistic. I just want to cuddle and fall asleep together. I just want to kiss him every time I see him. I just feel like I could be myself around him...my true self. I really want to tell him this, but I'm so chicken sh*t!!!! Like, should I do this over a fancy dinner, or while we're sitting on the couch, I don't know! Can anyone help me?!
Porn strike
I'm a 23 yrold gay man but still can't get aroused at the thought of being with another man (i feel like im not allowing myself ie homophobia) can I relax or lwt myself go enough to enjoy gay porn or just pics of guys or fantasies of guys? I think I'm gonna go on a porn strike until my body and mind cooperate
how can i tell my parents i am gay.
i am 15 and i have a boyfriend. i am scared my parents will kick me out.
that moment when..
You're having really really good conversation with a guy and have an extreme ammount in common and all they want from you is nudes and then they cuss you out and insult you for not delivering. blocks
2016. április 27., szerda
Where to go on vacations and meet people?
Hello /r/gay.So, recently I was promoted in my job (woohoo!) and now I have a fairly well paid position. I want to plan my vacations somewhere around the world :) but I don't know where. I want a very gay friendly place to meet new people.Somewhere in which I wouldn't need to open grindr to find new friends. Any suggestions guys? I'm really into music festivals. Kind of a geek too. I prefer cold weather (but sunny doesn't bother me).Anyway, thanks!
Will life be the same?
It's going to sound weird, but I might've damaged my prostate from too much pressure. I'm visiting the urologist and am prepared to receive a diagnosis for chronic prostatis. Thing is, I'm young and a strict bottom. Will this ruin my sex life? I might never experience true sexual intimacy from my condition. I'll take medication my whole life and will suffer pain. If I just stopped myself from "exploring" so roughly that night I'd live a normal life.
culture
I've always known I was gay for a long time, but I never got into gay "culture." Things like going clubbing, listening to Cher, and other things that are very popular in the gay community have never seemed appealing to me. Most would consider me "trade." I play in a hardcore/punk band and pretty much only have straight friends. I recently started dating a guy and he's completely changed my world. He opened my eyes to how much internalized homophobia I was dealing with. I'm really grateful for him because not only did he get me into some things like RuPaul's drag race and Cher, he also loves me for me and reminds me everyday to just be myself.tl;dr just be yourself. don't try too hard. it's taken me 25 years to finally figure this out.
Finding purpose and feeling settled as a gay guy
I'm not sure about you, but at 38 years old and single, I have been struggling to find purpose in my life. It's that stage in life where people are settling down - kids, relationships (open or otherwise!) and then there are us single gay guys who struggle to even get a reply on Grindr because we're "old" - despite actually being described by many as "handsome".Without something or someone to focus on, it's easy to feel quite unsettled. I don't even feel like I have a place/location that I'd call home, and because of that the thought of buying a home (so called settling down) scares the hell out of me. Life seems to be Work-Gym-Sleep-Refresh Grindr-RepeatAnyone else feel the same way? Any advice? Any wisdom? - other than the obvious ones like "join a club"; "sponsor a child"
gay blowjobs scene from a movie help please?
I need help finding this movie which had been bugging me for ages.Basically the plot is this guy (caucasian) travelling to South America and was staying in this hostel. Throughout the scene he was asleep and this Latino guy starts giving him a massage on his back and starts touching his buttocks until the guy getting the massage turns over to his front and let's the Latino guy give him a blow job.Sorry it's not as precise as much as I'd want to but I saw the video on tumblr and thought it was a really hot movie. I believe that the Latino guy giving him a blow job is his body guard. I also believe that this movie isn't a gay themed movie but it has some element into it. The actor playing also debut his first full frontol nudity.Thank you!
I love gingers
Well, to be fair, I like most guys. But redheads are, by far, my favorite. Which is funny, because in college I was kind of "meh" but now, I think they're hot.
loving but not fully supportive parents.
I just kinda wanna go on here to brag. yesterday my mother halfway defended me and took up for me in a thread on facebook about my sexuality. sure it was a little more religiously convicted and such but she did it in her own way and it made me feel good and as if she cares. it's never happened before, but It warmed my heart. I hope you all have a good day!
2016. április 26., kedd
Don't have much of a life around other gay people or any community , also don't know my type?
Hi...so first off I should say I might still consider myself bi but at this point in life I'd like to meet some gay guys I think. Just get to know other people who are also lgbt. But I can't seem to make the leap or step. I am technically out to people I know, but these days that's just family really, and it's more like I opened up that one time years ago , but it's not like I'm going to gay clubs or bringing gay guys around, plus I was even more ambiguous then so it was really like saying I might be gay or bi or something . basically to my family I am a single basically loner type who's too broke to go out anyway right now. But I have always felt more comfortable being around stra8 people , at least growing up, I really don't hang w anyone now. I know if I bringing a guy around my family would be a huge obstacle to cross for me , because I would feel uncomfortable and I think they would too. Things are good within my family but if I started dating someone and had all gay friends I feel like some relatives would distance themselves .I have never really been into gay bars, never really felt comfortable, which I understand could be just insecurity , but I'm not much of a bar guy anyway and don't like the music generally. i see guys that are really into the club music and really enjoy watching the drag shows, but I feel like we wouldn't have anything to talk about, maybe I'm wrong. Granted I haven't met a ton of gay guys and really tried to talk, so I am sort of stuck in a place where I'm not quite involved in anything lgbt related at the moment, And the guys I see or have known didn't appeal to me, maybe I'm need to meet more guys. In rare glimpses I can imagine maybe a type of guy I would be attracted to but really for the most part I don't see anyone I am drawn too. I actually can't really imagine a type of guy I would really be into or a personality type....so I dunno I guess I'm just venting a it, and maybe your in a similar place.
What do you think.
Ok so I need some advise. I have been with my boyfriend for around 6 years. I've always been happy with him and have always been one to do things his way. I don't know what to think I've been with him so long that if we end it or even think of ending it he always threats with going home to his parents so yes he lives with me I pay bills and everything. He contributes when needed so he's like my emergency net. Lately though I've noticing that I am a bitch pardon me for language. I mean he does things that make me mad like not watching feeding or take care of the pets. Won't cook clean or help. Gets on bed and just wants to be attended hand and foot while I'm working. I feel as though I am just looking at it from my side of things and I'm a bad person for the thoughts I have.Furthermore my parent says I don't look happy. That I should get rid of him that he's not a help so yes they know and honestly don't care just want me to be happy. Anyways others have told me the same. When I met him he was hard working had aspirations and dreams which have all dwindled granted to followed me when I moved but we ended up coming back because he didn't like the new location it was for work better pay and hours. He attributes that to me being with him that the dominos would not have fallen in place if I was not with him. I really love him he says he loves me but doesn't show it doesn't help doesn't want to do anything and I feel trapped.So /gay this is my first post ever let me know what you think.
Gay Music
So I dont know if you guys agree, but here in Montreal Canada, there doesnt seem to be much of a gay arts/music scene even though we, the gay community, are clearly (at least in this city) the ones who influence cultural trends...Anywho, feel free to share your thoughts/discuss/post ur stuff.Lets talk...Here's my song :http://ift.tt/1VJyKEQ
I came out to my girlfriend today!
I came out to my girlfriend today that I'm gay. Well ex girlfriend now she was amazing about it. She told me she started getting suspicious when she noticed I was having trouble getting it up and keeping it up. She thought I was cheating on her until she found d some gay porn on my phone. We're still living together and we're gonna start seeing other people. She said that she thinks it's kinda hott and would like to watch me with another guy or maybe even share a guy. I'm just so happy.
Gay Discord Group!
Sup, i've recently started a discord group for gay guys and i'm currently recruiting some members! Just casual gay group to talk about random things like, comics, musical theater, television shows, and gay stuff all around. If you're interested please click this link: http://ift.tt/1TciUMH be friends and have fun! Gay guys only though and 18+
Don't know a single other gay person!
I'm a 17 year old homo (in the closet to family but not to friends), I live in a normal sized uk town, population of about 45k, and I don't know a single other gay person! Probably a question asked before but, how do I find other gay people around my age?Because even just having a gay friend would help. I've come to the conclusion that if I want a bf I'll have to wait till go to uni in the closest city, but that's still a while away.
Visiting Berlin & Barcelona In June - suggestions?
Hello!I will be visiting Berlin and Barcelona and was wondering if anyone has any suggestions of where to go (gay or not)? Or wants to grab a drink? I'm twenty something new yorker traveling alone for the first time. I appreciate any suggestions!
I hate myself
21 years old here. I'm engaged to a beautiful and wonderful girl, been together for 4 years. Would be great except I'm starting to wonder about my sexual orientation. I've become interested in men when I had no interest when her and I got together. I wish I didn't feel these feelings, I hate myself for it. I wish I could just go back to being interested in just her and not wondering about "who I am." I'd rather kill myself than tell her I want to figure out who I am. I just don't want to fuck up somewhere down the road inside of a marriage. She deserves better than me, part of me wishes she never met me so she'd be better off but another part of me cherishes the memories I have with her. I still love her and I always will. I just hate myself. I know if I tell here that I want to figure this shit out I know it'll be over, she'll hate me, and my potential future of a happy marriage and kids will be destroyed. Fuck this is tearing me apart. I'm also sexually attracted to both sexes
My Boyfriend is Bisexual - Insecurities
Hi! I need some help on some thoughts I´m having lately.My Boyfriend and I are dating for some weeks now - it is the most wonderful, easygoing, loving relationship I´ve ever had. I am madly in love with him and i think he feels the same towards me.I absolutely understand and agree that sexuality is a spectrum. I for example know that i find girls attractive to a certain extend. But since i am (probably counciously) looking for a emotional connection / relationship with a man I identify as Gay, since the "desire" I´m having towards women is just not enough for me to pursue that.My Boyfriend however identifies as Bisexual. Which I absolutely should have no problem with- or at least wish i wouldnt have. He told me that he sees his sexuality as somewhat in fluidity throughout the sexual spectrum. Going from gay to straight and inbetween. He said he sometimes would wake up in the morning and feel like watching porn for example. Some days he would wanna watch straight porn- sometimes lesbian porn- sometimes straight porn and so on. That is absolutely fine since i believe that what people look for in porn does not necessarily define their sexuality (stimulation of fantasy etc.)We talk very openly and we are both open minded in terms of people having very individual sexual preferences etc. We both pursue the dream of a long-lasting monogamous relationship though.And again as much as i want to be chill, accepting and understanding of his sexuality as i basically am with everybody else i´d encounter. I cant help but feel a little insecure (and i hate it).Sometimes i find myself thinking where i stand in his "fluidity". I start overthinking his attraction to men and women. Wondering if I as a man will be sexually satisfying to him in the long run. Or if he will want to have sex with a woman just because he feels a sexual desire towards a girl or even simply female anatomy. I am wondering about wether he wants to have children or not. Wondering about straight relationships having a lot less social harships than gay relationships.I told him a little bit about it(dont want to be the crazy jealous boyfriend about it) and he tried comforting me- reassuring that he wants to be with me and that he thinks of his sexuality not as beeing attracted to everything at all times but more that he is not primarily concerned with the genitals of the person he loves.Before it gets too confusing and long. I should be happy and enjoy this wonderful relationship i was lucky to find- yet I cant get over my insecurities. Has anyone experience with a similar situation? Or does someone has a similiar idea about his sexuality as my boyfriend?Appreciate all the help guys :)
Long time lurker. I have a question about my curiousity.
Hello all! I've been on reddit for a little bit now. However I never really do anything except lurk...however I'm hoping I can still get some...idk, insight/help with understanding who/what I am. My whole life I've never had a hard time getting women. I'm charming, fairly attractive, intelligent (at least, I'd like to believe I am) and funny. I love women. I've been with over 30 of them. I find them to easily be the most beautiful things on this planet. I can truly only see myself with a woman for the rest of my life and be completely happy.That being said...im extremely submissive, I love being told what to do, being shown how to please, doing whatever I can to make the other feel good...I've been fucked by five guys in my life...so far. I don't plan on stopping anytime soon...I love being pounded, owned, felt like I have no control in being fucked and bred by a big, husky daddy...I'm a petite guy, 5'6, 120 lbs hairy Puerto Rican, 27 years old. I love the whole daddy/son roleplay and can go for hours. oh my god the feeling of being filled...It's indescribableNoone knows about this in my life. I'm extremely discreet and hide this from everyone I know. I mostly go through craigslist/a4a.com. (clearwater, fl...btw XD...adam4adam is mmmtasty6969 I am std free and frequently get checked out)But its only when i get in the "mood" so to speak...i often jerk off to straight porn. But every now and then i go to certain gay porn sites and cum like ive never cum before. The mood is rare. It could be a year before i feel like getting fucked. But when i get that urge, Its almost impossible for it to go away on its own...i NEED it...cock, cum in me...I am not attracted to men, not physically other than their cocks...I fucking love cocks. 6in, 7in, 8in...size doesn't matter. It's the only thing I like about them...I hate most of them mentally, I love cock, I love cum.What's up with me? Am I gay? Bi? I don't believe I'll ever be able to be in a relationship with another man. I do not see myself as gay...but this shit is confusing! Any input I could get on this would be very much appreciated. It's been running through my mind for years with no answer.
2016. április 25., hétfő
Interesting behavior in myself
So I have an interesting behavior that I've noticed in myself that I'm trying to change. Thought it was worth a post, maybe someone has thoughts.Example encounter: Walking on a sidewalk. Cute guy walks by in the other direction, obviously gay. I divert my eyes, look at my phone, etc. I don't know if it's from years of being in the closet, not wanting anyone to notice if I check this guy out, or what. But I keep subconsciously cockblocking myself and probably coming across as a complete asshole.Anyone have any thoughts? Ever done this yourself? Gotten past it?
Anyone wanna skype and jerk off 18
Anyone pm me and we can skype and jerk off, any older me out there I like you
Wondering how to handle this situation on grindr (encountering someone you used to know)
I know not to expect much from grindr, but I was curious what you all thought of my situation and if you had any suggestions on how to handle it.So there's this guy that I used to go to middle school with. We weren't like best friends or anything, but we were friendly with each other. I remember sitting next to him, and talking and laughing together about a lot of stuff. I'm not sure if he moved away or what, but I basically haven't seen him since middle school since we haven't really kept in touch.Fast-forward like over a decade, and I see his profile on grindr. He's grown up really well lol, barely recognizable. But after contemplating, I decide to message him. I don't make any mention of knowing who he is, so that I don't creep him out or anything. Interestingly enough, he responds asking if I am who I am and that he used to know me in middle school and we had a class together, etc (in a very surprised, enthusiastic, friendly way). So I kinda go with it, and we exchange a couple messages about how long it's been and all of that. It was a very friendly exchange.However, after that, he completely stops responding. It's been almost 2 weeks since he last replied, and I'm not really sure why. This happened around the time of the grindr outage where they were saying the messages didn't work, so I thought it might be that. But after it was supposedly resolved, I tried messaging him again just to see how he was doing, and still no response.I'm pretty confused about this, and kinda disappointed, cuz I was actually genuinely interested in him, even if just for the friendship. I just don't understand why he would've responded in the first place if he wasn't interested, let alone make mention of how we used to know each other. I'm trying to imagine the situation from his perspective, and I don't get it. If you received a message from someone you used to know and recognized them, but weren't interested in them at all, why would you bother responding and make a big deal about how we know each other?? Why not just ignore me? I guess I'd get over it if it was just a random guy I didn't know, but the fact that we do know each other makes it kinda weird.. It's not like we hated each other back then.Just curious what you all think.. Is this normal behavior? Should I try to message him again? Friend request him on Facebook? (lol just kidding, i'm not that crazy). Anyway, sorry for the long post!! Thanks for any advice!
I might be bi
I'm really confused. I always loved girls but I would be open to suck a guy's cock. I don't know about sex, it would depend of the moment I guess. Am I bi? Any guy wants to talk to help me figure it out?
help completing survey on dating and sexual preferences
Hi r/gay,• I’m a graduate student conducting research on men who have sex with men (MSM)’s dating preferences• I need your help in completing this survey• The survey will take about 30 minutes to complete• The link to the survey is: http://ift.tt/1WmqOrQ The research question is: if different experiences and psychological characteristics affect gay or MSM men’s preferences for dating or sexual partners• If you have any questions, feel free to send me a PM on Reddit or email at ybhambha@go.olemiss.edu• Thank you! Have a good day!
Gay, over 40 and relevant!
Being in your prime as a gay man is often subjective. One of the most famous iconic gay historians in history couldn’t have put it better by penning the ode “Youth is wasted on the young”. The striking truth of this goes unnoticed until you reach a certain maturity with which comes the ability to reflect.At 44 I am more confident, happier with my looks and more independent that I have ever been. I have lost my father, faced some serious problems with alcohol and had a partner of three years deceive me about his HIV status. Although challenging these experiences don´t define me. I´m better able to reflect and this leaves me better placed than before going forward. As a 40 something single gay man we fall into one of the following three categories. 1. The bitter club some characteristics being, berating Grinder users whose profiles have an upper age limit for example 25 - 39. Retaliating buy sending messages to said users for dismissing us for the sake of a calendar year. Suddenly becoming OK with paying rent boys having previously thought of the possibility repulsive and for the sole use of ugly, old men. This is usually disguised as a sheep in Wolves clothing where they are helping out, or befriending a younger guy who is trying to make his way in life. It´s sold to friends as a befriending mentoring act of philanthropy but inevitably ends up with an exchange of sexual favours and this never involves kissing and usually a sexual act where the younger party does anything to avoid removing his clothes, IE Hand Job, oral. Why? Because the protégé (Ho) is not sexually attracted to the Guru (Ho Buyer) and wants to expedite the act as quickly as humanly possible and the Guru (Ho Buyer) realises that kissing would open them up to the possibility of falling in love with an inappropriately aged candidate (Ho), so though not apparent the bitter club realise love is possible but are frightened of its inappropriate forms. (Yes they do actually care what people think) In summary the general bitter club category unusually portray themselves not wanting a relationship. They can come across as only looking for emotionless sexual encounters and often play up their promiscuous side. They are afraid or unaware how to open themselves up to love. The often wear overly tights t-shirts and have a large collection of the Pet shop Boys records and Prisoner Cell Block H on VHS. The also sometimes hang in groups and call each other Blanche, Sade or Madge. In Gay clubs around the world they could often be seen gather in flocks on dancefloors drawn by the opening two bars of I’m coming up by Diana Ross. This is the gay illuminati and you will see any younger gays, beards and lesbians bewildered having failed to reach the required qualification in calendar years or god playing the trick of giving them the wrong gender. Note, with the increasing number of Lesbian DJs this phenomenon is becoming in danger of disappearing completely. Thankfully this still is prevalent in the bear and cub community so the general public can still experience this for the price of a can of red strip. Please be respectful enough to look bewildered in you are a gay man under 40 or female and only present to witness the display.2. The Optimist. This is the easier group to spot. They often go under the radar, unnoticed in the wider general community. Unlike the bitter club the optimist usually sports age appropriate clothing and nests comfortable in a family type home. They prefer less gregarious colours and often have pillows which solely have the purpose of decoration. They even save a special space in their wardrobes to store these pillows before going to bed. They prefer to stay in inviting friends to dinner and although they still go to gay clubs they usually reserve this wild side to Saturdays having spent the whole week building up to it. They often have many heterosexual friends and have become uncles to their offspring. They function well in society making great friends. Usually accomplished they become increasingly independent through age ironically making it more difficult to find a relationship. They are however open to the possibility and fantasise about having it all. They hoard a large collection of films including, Love Story, Beaches, and Terms of Endearment and have the original on VHS and a duplicate on DVD or Blue ray. They inevitably and unashamedly listen to Bet Midler and rearrange their furniture a lot. In contrast to the Bitter club their house is already prepared for life as a couple. They have the dog, two sofas, 6 chairs around the dining table and a full fridge. They also burn incense and buy a lot of spiritual books. They are open to the cosmic world delivering their perfect partner and have been preparing for the eventuality since birth. The will usually have had several medium term relationships behind them and these will have failed not because of cheating but for excuses such as, We were in different places or we grew apart. They do sometime have casual sex, but often fall in love and are saddened by the morning after or the abrupt departure without breakfast. They feel guilty for giving out on the first night. They are also guilty of stalker texting post sex only to be ignored which in turn reinforces their belief that they should wait for the cosmos to deliver. Meantime, the read cover to cover ´The monk who sold his Ferrari´ highlighting the subliminal messages they interpret and implement there to improve their chances. The optimist also is attracted to Kitchen Gadgets and inevitably owns a high end Juicer, having tried and failed to follow the ´Fat sick and Nearly Death´ challenge. They also always have one if not more halogen oven having been bought for the possibility of cooking low fat chips. These appliances are always white and stored out of site and never displayed as a sign of wealth on counter tops as would be the norm for heterosexual women of similar years. They don’t like to face their failings and these appliances remind them of their failed attempts at change. The optimist usually is a comfort eater and tends to procrastinate about the need to shed the extra pounds he carries. 3. The Hybrid. In short it means you live in the present have casual sex but at the same time open yourselves up and long for something more fulfilling. This can be as a result of loneliness and is usually as a result of living the previous two categories unsuccessfully and coming to the realisation that it is time to try something else. The danger here is that you are of course open yourselves up to things in reality you don’t aspire to. The two are opposite poles of a magnet. Buying the complete back catalogue of Bet Midler doesn’t make you the Optimist nor does sporting a belly top a bottle of poppers and lying about your age on grinder make you the care free bitter queen.In conclusion what it can do is open your eyes to the fact that we are all evolving and that if you don´t want me because I’m 40 and not 39 you’re a dick. If I don’t want you because you like Bet Midler, I’m a dick and if you are waiting your whole life for some idyllic misconceived idea of perfection that makes you half a dick. It’s all good and well to have expectations but like moving in to a new house it’s never your own until you live in it a while. I make a point of dating people who I might not have in the past because I was a little up my own ass. So far it’s been a disaster but whilst in my Hybrid phase I remain optimistic. If worst comes to worst I´ll buy a tight tea shirt, pay a rent boy and ask him to dress up and lip sync to Bet Midler. This would fulfil all my need for a short time with the exception of kissing but I have learned that I need to be that flexible as not to miss my given cosmic rights.The views expressed above are completely mine. I own all of them.Namaste Lee Robert Ness
I can't date/mate with hot guys. Am I and idiot?
An oppotunity of having a date (actually a meet and f...) with a really hot guy came to me and I forze. I refuse him many times. To me I couldn't be with his since he was too hot for me and was expecting things from me I couldn't give him. I'm body akward. I'm sort of fat, I wouldn't say I'm down right ugly at all. But I still feel bad because I'd have liked to meet him but I seemed to reject the idea more strongly. Am I and idiot?
Sorry To Do This To You, Subreddit, But I Could Use Some Tips
This is gonna be really gross and Im sorry to be shelling my life out to you guys and ladies, but I feel like at least some of you have had the same problem as me. Here we go....So I havent had sex in three years, and this last month has been the most active for me. About two weeks ago, I downloaded Grindr (my first mistake, I know) just to see what all the huff and puff was about. You can imagine my surprise when I got hit up not twenty minutes later and drove to a guys house to blow him. However to no avail, as it wasnt really doing anything for him. But Im getting off track here....Last sunday I drove down to a guys house and we, well, had sex. And it was really all I could possibly ask for and more. Slow, passionate, angry, fast, all in varying orders and lasted for about 2 or 3 hours. There was only one problem; being such an unexperienced lover, I wasnt aware of cleaning my bunghole. I mean, I was, but I thought it was a simple wipe well or get it done professionally. (Mistake number two.) Didnt seem to bother him, though, which I appreciated. It was still pretty embarrassing.To prevent these "messes," I went out and bought a baster of sorts and started using that. I wont be able to tell how effective it's been since I wont be bangin until later today, but did you know that your ENTIRE digestive tract contains mucus? I sure as hell didnt, until I went to the bathroom and saw that and a bit of blood, instead of the usual waste.Is there a safer way to get the job done, redditors? I just dont want something like that to happen again, and I DEFINITELY do not wanna give myself infections and hemerroids and shit for the sake of sex. Any advice?
Relationships with a closeted guy, please help.
So I posted here not so long ago and received some good advice, thank you for all who helped. I'm in a bit of a dilemma and would appreciate another helping hand.Long story short, I started dating a guy who is 15 years older than me (he's 37 and i'm 22), we will call him John. Originally I was taken back when I found out that his kids are 19 and 17, relatively close to my age. He was recently divorced from his wife and had just started exploring the gay scene when I had met him. I didn't expect him to come out anytime soon but as his boyfriend i'm not too sure how to feel about this.Things have been moving fairly quick for us. Recently I had trouble with my landlord and decided to move out, I was going to move in with my dad who is about a 30 minute drive away until I found a new place. John insisted on me staying with him instead so we've been living together for about a week now. I told him I would try to find a place soon but he's been hinting for me to just stay. I've also introduced him to a few of my friends already and they seem to like him.My trouble is this hasn't been really returned. I don't think he's going to come out anytime soon. Coming out to his family is going to be really difficult, on top of that he works in construction so I feel if his friends there find out it's still going to make for a bad environment. The only other friends he really has are guys he was in the military with and he laughed at the notion of telling them.So what do I do? Do I just ride it out and see where it goes or maybe move on? He's everything i like physically and his personality clicks well with mine, things just feel right with him. I really like him but I want a boyfriend who I can show off and vice versa. Have any of you had a similar experience? Thank you for reading this and any advice is appreciated.
2016. április 24., vasárnap
Help Stop Hate Speech on Facebook
Report this page for Hate Speech and Harassment pleasehttps://www.facebook.com/antigay.marriage
The lie of the bear community
So I'm a bigger guy. Not like 600lbs, but definitely out of shape. I definitely am attracted to bigger guys, so I joined grommr thinking there'd be some dating potential there that I may not find on grindr or Ok cupid.I was wrong. There's just as much narcissism and shallowness in that community. There's tons (pun semi-intended) of chubby twinks who vie for all the attention and affection of that community, and those of us who are average-looking are left in the dust.I guess I'm just sick of feeling alienated and not fitting in anywhere in this so-called "gay community". I'm not pretty or skinny enough to be in the mainstream. I'm not the 'right' kind of fat to be in the bear/gainer scene. I'm just in this purgatory of mediocre appearance, and wishing something other than looks would be counted in the world of gay dating.Hoping someone else feels this way...
Awkward situation that happens awkwardly??
When guys say that I am really attractive but I don't consider them to be so I just go ohhh thanks. Like do they expect me to complement them back orrr
Am I a twink or not?
OK so someone told me I'd have to show slightly more skin in a picture to determine whether or not I am a twink. Here is a picture of fitness progress: I am doing NSFW because it is shirtless but I hope that isn't breaking any rules here! Thanks!http://ift.tt/1T84ay8
What is Dallas gay life like?
I will be in Dallas this summer for work. How is the gay life for a college student? I get the mental picture of old creepy guys at the bars. What is it actually like?
Gay films or books
Does anyone know of any good films/ books where the protagonist happens to be gay, rather than it being about them being gay
Introducing the same sex SO at dinner?
I want to introduce my SO to my family. This is my first serious relationship, that also happens to be a same-sex one. I'm super nervous and my family isn't the most welcoming when it comes to this. I'm thinking of inviting my SO to supper with my family, any advice on how to not make it go disastrously?
I feel like a terrible boyfriend.
I am a man with a girlfriend, she means the world to me. I care about her so much. Our sex life I good. But whenever I'm alone I alway fantasize about being with a man. I'm sorry if this is wrong sub or of I'm breaking any rules. I just feel like a bad person because I know she loves me, and I love her, but I can't stop thinking about wanting to be with another man. I know if she found out it would crush her. I just feel like I needed to get this off my chest. I don't know if any of you have gone through anything similar, or if you know anyone who has. I just need to talk to somebody.
2016. április 23., szombat
Why is online dating so depressing?
I recently started an okcupid account just to see what there is for the selection of gay and bisexual men in my area. There are some with very high compatibility numbers, but they are much too far out of my league or if I message them, I never get a response. I like to think that I'm not off-puttingly hideous or anything, but it's rather disheartening to receive no interest from anyone.Personal info: 18 yrs old, 6ft tall, White/Caucasian complexion, blond hair, and blue eyesIf there is any way to fix this or help me in some way, please inform me.
Need advice about dealing with parents
I know this is very long!! This first part is context, basically my life story, jump to the next bold text if you want to go to where I actually ask for advice!My parents found out I was gay for the first time when I was at the start of ninth grade, about five and a half years ago (I’m 19 now). They found out I had kissed a boy and then the next day I didn’t go to school and I never went back to my high school and never saw my friends again (until this past year I’ve seen a few again). My mom, a couple months ago, told me that me being sent to a Christian school was entirely unrelated to me being gay, although I was sent there as soon as they had found out I had kissed a boy. But, sure, entirely unrelated.They found out I was gay the second time a couple years ago in my junior year of high school when my mom grabbed my phone and saw all my texts and found my tumblr (which didn’t have any porn on it, to clarify, it was literally just shitty memes and me being myself). At this time I told her it wasn’t changing, because the first time they found out I, of course, tried to change myself (again). I told her I was who I was and it wasn’t going away. We didn’t talk about it.On July 2nd, 2014 I got a boyfriend. He lived in New Jersey then so we were long distance. On August 15th I moved into my dorm and was finally separate from my family. The next week my boyfriend came down to visit (I live in Kentucky) and we had a great week together and it was amazing. I worked at an embroidery shop owned by some Christian people at the time and I was ready to start living my gay life so I went with my boyfriend to my place of work and introduced him to my boss. She didn’t seem surprised when I said I was gay, she gave me a hug and told me she would always love me and I went on my merry little way. That night I got a phone call from my dad screaming at me for being a liar and my mother was crying and I had ruined their lives and I was going to destroy my life and blah blah blah. The usual stuff.Quick and fun story, the following day I went with my boyfriend to Starbucks because he’d never tried a fancy coffee drink (not that Starbucks is that fancy) so I had him try an espresso based drink (a white mocha) and while we were there my dad called and we had a conversation that went like this: “Where are you?” “I’m at Starbucks.” “[with contempt] Is HE there?” “Yeah.” “Okay… well listen. Just say yes or no, he can’t hear me, so just yes or no. Are you there of your own free will.” You got me dad. He kidnapped me, then took me to Starbucks, then bought me a five dollar drink, and he let me keep my phone. He’s such a kindhearted kidnapper.Any way, back to the main story. After a winter break at home with my parents full of their passive aggression and my contemplating of suicide I realized I could never ever live with them again. Especially not for an entire summer break. My boyfriend and I had talked about him moving down and us living together so we decided to put that plan into action.He moved down in March of last year, so we’ve lived together for a little over a year and things are going absolutely fantastically. Still very much in love and both convinced we’ll get married one day. I mean, look, I know I’m 19 and I know it’s ridiculous for me to think that I know I want to marry someone but I’ve known precisely what I wanted out of a relationship since I was 8 years old and this guy is the one. I knew within a week of speaking to him that he would be a huge part of my life, because I just knew there was something with him. We’ve been together for a year and a half and lived together for a year and I’ve yet to have a single reason to think he isn’t literally perfect for me. I mean of course we’ve bickered and had a couple fights, but we’re always honest with each other and committed to each other and we both want the same things out of life and we just work together.Sorry, got side tracked by love, back to the issue I’m here about.A couple months back my mom sent me a link to a website with a bunch of helpful tips about gay sex. Because if I’m going to choose to live the lifestyle I’ve chosen then I should at least know the “unbiased facts”. Website was a bunch of scare tactics with misinformation owned by a conservative organization. At the top there was a literally a tab with testimonials from people explaining how gay conversion therapy really worked for them. Obviously not unbiased.I, of course, was pissed. I’ve had a lot of people read these conversations because I wanted to verify I’m not the crazy one and to verify I handled it well, and I really think I did. Every text I’ve sent to her, excluding maybe three or four over the two months this happened, were level headed. I explained to her what was wrong about that site, how it was biased, how it used outdated and out of context information, and how it was offensive for her to send it to me.One thing I’ve learned from all of this is that if you can’t always teach someone who is willfully ignorant. I had attacked her, I was coming for her, she was just trying to help. Etc etc.For about two months I received increasingly aggressive texts from her. By the end of it they were purely hateful, insulting me and my boyfriend (someone she has never met and knows literally nothing about). I had to block her phone number because, for my mental health, I couldn’t handle it.A few weeks ago I wrote an article for my school newspaper where I’m interning. An editorial piece on nuanced homophobia (if you want to read it for context it’s here ).Another screaming phone call from my dad. I’m ruining everyones lives, what if my brother and sister find out, anyone could read that, how dare I personally attack my mother. I explained that it wasn’t meant as an attack, that I was trying to tell my story and to share a greater lesson about how you can unintentionally hurt someone, how just because you say something doesn’t mean someone can’t feel hurt by your actions. It was meant to be more universal than homophobia.This is the part where I ask for adviceSo now I’m in a pickle.During those horrid two months of speaking to my mom before blocking her phone number and her becoming increasingly hateful she claimed that she wanted to be in my life, and I told her I wanted her in my life too. I asked her to meet my boyfriend. To just have lunch with us or something. She told me that she wanted to meet with just me first because we had some things we needed to discuss. I told her that if she really wanted to be in my life she had to prove it to me, because I don’t think she wants to be in my life as it is, and I told her she could meet with me and my boyfriend or not meet with me.Now after my article on homophobia (read by approximately three people (and that’s counting both my parents)) they’re saying I should meet with just them, and I’m standing my ground. However now they’re saying that if I meet with them then we can talk about telling my younger brother and sister I’m gay. I don’t want to budge, but I want my brother and sister to know I’m gay and then I can tell my grandparents and then I can be out on Facebook and then I can live my life as gayly as I want to without worrying about who knows and who doesn’t and living my life how they want me to live it because for two years I’ve been telling them I want to come out and they’ve convinced me to wait.I want so badly to be publicly out, and I’m struggling so hard getting there. Trying to maintain bonds with my family but to come out on my terms without waiting as long as they want me to (which I’ve discovered is forever).And I just don’t know what to do.Oh, also, on the phone with my dad last week he said I need to meet with just him and my mom first because if he meets with me and my boyfriend he knows he’s mad at me and he would probably take his anger out on my boyfriend and beat him to death.You know, because he’s sane.Any advice is welcome, anything I didn’t explain well enough I can clarify, and if you want to hear more ridiculous and often hilarious stories about my parents I can tell those too.Thanks, everyone.
Getting attached
I need a bit of help/advice. I've been trying to avoid/ignore the fact that I might be developing a bit of a crush on a guy. Problem is he still loves/cares about his ex(very recent), who's also someone I know and someone we'll both be working with in the next couple of month. I do worry about him since his recent break up is hitting him hard but I'm stuck seeing this feeling as something like a friend and something more. Mostly been trying to ignore the feeling that I might be attracted to him. Whats worse is I'm a bit afraid ,not only because he still has feeling for his ex but also because I might ty have come off as homophobic something/denying that being gay was a thing.Tldr; Its fucking complicated and I'm choosing to just ignore my feelings but still supporting the guy somehow (despite my social tendencies Lol)
Male trust issues - Anyone else experience this?
Warning I'm a little drunk and an little rambling:Growing up like most other boys I always had other guy friends. I typically tended to have one best friend who I'd always have a way deeper friendship with. Mind you I always loved the friendships I had with girls or childhood "girlfriends" cause I loved that dynamic of friendship that girls had.Anyhow actually getting to the story and skipping ahead to my teenage years when I was 15 and coming to terms with my sexuality my best friend and disclosed our bicurious feelings to each other and decided to fool around, and we did. Following that he went silent, I couldn't get him to text back, he would avoid me at school. It took me over a week to get him to confront me and talk and he said he wasn't gay blah blah blah not a new story, I know... He wasn't nasty or anything but I had feelings for him that not even I knew I had and it really hurt. But I had to keep this hurt to myself and we stopped talking, practically I lost (more than just) my best friend.This also coincided (not related to what happened with my friend, he didn't out me or anything) with a lot of alienation and micro-bullying and taunting (idk the terms but 100% you can probably know what I'm talking about) from other guys at my high school.From this point onwards and we're talking like 7-8 years now all my friends have been exclusively girls, there have been literally a 2-4 guys I have considered kinda friends.Any interaction with other males I always feel like they're somehow mocking me or just being nice to the gay.I feel know this is effecting and eliminating any potential romantic interests from occurring, I want need this to change.Has anyone else experienced anything like this and can offer any empathy or advice?tl:dr typical high school gay alienation shit and now I don't trust guys
I'm not sure how to feel about this.
My boyfriend [M20] and I [M17] met at some party several months ago and hooked up that night after he brought me to his house and within a few weeks he actually asked me to be his boyfriend and being sixteen at the time I was a little nervous about the entire thing and felt kind of easy I guess since I didn't wait to do things. I'm not sure all that I should mention but my problem I suppose is more that even though I was completely terrified of coming out to my parents I still ended up doing it for him and they were completely fine with it seeing as I'd been a lot happier than I was before I met him, but I still haven't met his parents and that's kind of what bugs me. He's told me that his parents know he's gay and that they'd love me, yet I still haven't met them and we've almost been together a year. I don't know if I should be mad or anything because it is his choice. I just feel like he isn't as open with me and I feel like he might be embarrassed of me and I can't help but think that it's because I'm younger. I've talked about it with him telling him I would want to meet them and he says that he'll bring me over to actually do it but it never actually happens. I've kind of left the topic alone for a couple months, but it still bothers me and I don't know if it should.
I need help...
Recently, I've met the sweetest, loveliest, sexiest guy ever and I feel like I'm falling in love with him. The only problem is he told me he's straight. How do I get out of this? How do I move on?
How to tell family I'm in a same sex relationship?
I've been seeing this person for about 2 months and things have started to get pretty serious. My family knows I'm gay but they generally avoid the topic and only refer to them as a "friend". I need a way to tell them that they are more than just a friend, and to get it through their head.
Coming Out Letter
Hey everyone,20/m/australia here. I want to come out to my parents through a letter - pretty much all my friends know I'm gay and I want to tell my parents, but I'm a lot more eloquent in writing and get tied up when I speak, and I'd prefer to right out all my feelings and thoughts so they're uninterrupted, than come out just in a conversation. That and I'm unsure how they will react so I'm hoping a letter will give them time to process things instead of just speaking straight away.So that said I'm thinking of writing a coming out letter to my parents, explaining that I love them and all they have done for me and that this isn't a result of anything they've done wrong, that me being gay is just how I am and how I always have been and that it won't change anything, and that this isn't a phase and I've come to accept this over the last few years. And also mentioning some other people who are gay that they like (for example a contestant on a cooking show we all watch, who my parents love and always say is really sweet) just to highlight the fact that being gay isn't abnormal and that being gay doesn't change anything.Does anyone have any tips for coming out in letters? I'm not sure whether to hand it to them and sit there while they read it, or leave it somewhere for them and leave the house for a few hours to give them time to process it, before I come back.
Question
It seems that there are double standards between trans people and gay people. Clearly this is an anecdote, but I still think about this daily. I am a gay male, and I had some really negative experiences when I say that I identify as masculine and that I prefer masculine men.Why are people who feel like they are in the wrong gender encouraged to transition? Does this not imply that gender other than biological gender is an important part of our identity? It is okay for me to be aware of my gender abnormalities so much so that I feel that transitioning will relieve anxiety, and that is accepted by society, or at least by the LGBT community.I am not trying to offend anyone, I just really want to not see this as a double standard. Clearly, I want all trans people to be able to identify as whomever they feel comfortable, I just do not understand why not trans, gay people are "not allowed" to have just as much preference when it comes to gender without it seeming like it is close minded.
Why is it that Gay guys with the smallest dicks act like they are the most to be desired and guys with the biggest dicks are the most desperate
As of late I've been running into a lot of guys with small members, and although size isn't everything and what counts most is your performance and personality these guys have been acting like they're God's greatest gift on this green earth.I'm talking about standing me up when were supposed to hang out and calling me hours later with an attitude of "you should be happy I'm at least calling you" and expecting me to pay for everything with a smile and than when its time to get naked I look down and it looks like a garden snake and when I look up they're looking at me like I should be gawking like I just found a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.Then when I run into a guy that's packing in my opinion(9-10" or ALOT of Girth) they're fucking desperate or broken. they want to get naked so bad that its a fucking turn off or they're so insecure about it that they aren't even comfortable talking about sex even though were both attracted to each other . What's the problem here am I doing something wrong
When People Say "Gay" When They Actually Mean "Flamboyant"
I'm perfectly fine with flamboyant people, but what I'm not fine with is when gay people think that they're "more gay" than other gay people just because they're more effeminate/flamboyant.In my opinion, it's like they're stereotyping not only themselves, but gay people in general and these stereotype lead to awful terms like "straight acting" for those who do not exhibit the traits.Hell, I once even caught some gay people trying to say that more masculine gay guys were trying hard to be like that and that those people should just be themselves by being more effeminate. It's almost like there's some gay people who actually think femininity directly correlates with being gay and that masculine gay guys are somehow still in denial with themselves.It really bothers me that some gays fail to see that we're a diverse group of people and that not everyone is necessarily going to live up to the stereotypes they seem to hold so true. It's just another example of discrimination within the community I guess...So if you're flamboyant, please continue on being yourself, but also remember that you're not "more gay" than other gay people just because you fit the stereotype.This mostly applies to gay men, since I don't really see thing happening with lesbians or bisexuals. (Not sure about trans people though in this case.)
2016. április 22., péntek
Do looks matter to gay guys? I'm 21, gay geek, slim, introverted and not masculine in dating or friends.
Hi guys. I'm an overthinker and also very suicidal because of my severe trauma from my past on guys teasing me for my looks or seeing me as a play toy for sex. My name is Deon and I'm from Phoenix which is a decent city to live in besides gay guys out here being on the DL and acting so called straight acting lol. I had experienced sex before but never dated and really worry what you guys think of me and everyone else. Please don't be harsh.I was about to cut my arms tonight or having thoughts because of my loneliness and really think I'm worthless on this earth since I have severe depression, OCD, and also Autistic . Growing up, I wasn't all social or macho like other guys should be because I didn't want to fake myself and being someone else and even other gay guys wanted to hurt me for it. My mom was a single mother ( bless her heart ) because I didn't act all aggressive and wanting to act like a male stereotype by being into cars, screwing girls, and being all muscular as it seems most gay guys dream of that and find me unattractive or just a nobody for who I am even though I accept myself. I'm 5'6 weighing 120 and I'm mixed black with curly hair and having a slim frame and also have a geeky personality by wearing pajamas, colorful scarfs, beanies, and graphic shirts. I'm also not social since I'm a loner and do things alone. I love myself for who I am but I think I'm not good enough to even have friends because you guys or other people will say go to bars, meet people, and sleep around like I need to fit in. I really want to cry because I even had taken a risk to talk to guys on online dating sites such as OkCupid, POF, and also tried Grindr but was a horrible app and had a bad experienced from there that almost taken my life. That's when I was used for sex and even had my phone stolen from me by some guys when I was 18 after running away from home and having family problems. I think about everything and never had real friends and was taken advantage of my size, not being masculine, and feel inferior to taller well built masculine guys who seem straight and intimidating. All I care for is personality in a guy way more than looks and was considered as a ghost to all types of guys in my lifetime so far. Thank you for reading. My heart really hurts right now and also dealt with panic attacks and insomnia so I have major health issues and used to be in Special ED as a child and got bullied at school and no one supported me as much since I'm also a guy.If any of you wants to PM me, please do. I'm still new here so it will take time for me to get used to. I just really feel scared and very lonely and
Not Sure Why I Don't Enjoy Sex
Hello All,I am looking to find out if anyone has any resources/insights that I could use for some self evaluation of why I don't enjoy sex?So here is the back-story... I was closeted for a long time (mid 30s now) and just recently came out. I have always dreamed about what it would be like to be with another guy. So in recent months I have been trying to see what I am missing. I have been with a few people now (4), and I really enjoy making out (hugging/kissing/petting), but as soon as it gets serious I lose my libido. Once the clothes come off and it comes time for actual sex I get soft. I will give a BJ or my ass for the guy to get off, but I am not into it sexually. At first I thought it was performance anxiety, but it would seem like that should go away sometime right? The longer it goes on the more I think that maybe I am a/demi-sexual? Maybe I spent too many years in my fantasies? It is frustrating because I really love the idea of a man to hold all night, someone to share my life with, but sex is a huge ingredient to successful relationships and what if I cannot perform in that area? So maybe I am just destined to be alone. Wow that sounded dark and whiny.So I am looking to find out if anyone else has ever been through something similar, or if anyone knows of any resources I can research to better understand what is up with me.Thanks in advance.
Seeking 18 HIV Negative Men for Research Study with PAID options!
Hi, my name is Jessica Cunningham, I’m a research assistant at the University of Massachusetts Boston. Working in conjunction with gay, bisexual, and queer-affirmative researchers at UMASS and Suffolk University in Boston, MA, I am looking for sexual minority men to participate in a study investigating psychological strengths and sexual health. If you identify as male, are over 18 years old, HIV-negative, identify with something other than heterosexual, and have experienced adversity in life, we would love to get the chance to interview you as part of this important research! Participants will be paid for their time and receive referrals to legal, mental health, or physical health services. If interested, get started by taking the 20-min online screener, then sign up to be interviewed at: http://ift.tt/1Sp3OmY Participation in the study includes completing a 20-minute online screening to determine eligibility, and two anonymous interviews over Skype (using only audio, not video; interviews would be between 30-90 minutes long). All research has been approved by the human ethics committee (IRB) at Suffolk University. Also, if you participated in this study over the summer or more recently, please don't participate again! If you have any questions please send me a PM or email me at MensHealthStudy@Suffolk.edu Thanks!
What's going on with me?
I'm almost 17, I've never been in a relationship, never had sex. No one to talk to about anything I'm going through.I was skimming a story on gaystoriesgonewild, about a guy who went on Adam for Adam, to tease guys and get attention. And ended hooking up with an older man.It sounded so hot, I wanted to try it, I have a thing for older men, daddy issues I guess. Anyways I created an account, and now there are older men wanting to get to know me, calling me sexy. Telling me things I've always wanted to hear.I feel bad for lying, and I don't want do to anything beyond chatting.Now I think about it all day, and has made my urges stronger.Is this all a form of deep insecurities? Should I stop?
WTF is wrong with me??????
So I've spent a long time repressing myself and I finally am in a place where I accept who I am and am ready to date guys. I've been looking for potential dates since the summer with worse than zero luck. In December I arranged 3 dates. 2 no showed and the third sent me a text saying "I arranged 2 dates tonight, one with someone attractive one as a backup and the attractive person showed up. So F*** off". After a few months of not really looking I finally put myself out there again and signed up for Tinder. The first guy I met on there spent a month messing me around before I realised I was being catfished. The second guy I met spent a week chatting to me we arranged a date for tomorrow and then he vanished from my tinder. We'd added each other on Snapchat so that we could verify each others identities and he's also blocked me on there so it was definitely deliberate. Is there something wrong with me or is this just what guys are like?
[RANT] Is it possible to be too straight-acting for your own good? Because I'm pretty sure I've managed it without even trying.
I've become a grumpy old man. I'm 22. Look on my sins and weep. Sorry about the rant in advance.TL;DR: Some people are lucky enough to be gay. I was unlucky enough.I've managed to completely fuck myself up through being a hyper straight-acting man. And I mean hyper.How hyper? Years ago, when I was a nipper of around 11, I realised that I wasn't like the other boys. Rather, I liked the other boys. Not a unique story by any stretch of the imagination. Eventually, I came to grips with this and came out to my family at the age of 18. I came out to my friends around then as well.I still have all my family and friends. Because (basically) no one believed me for about 18 months. Some of my friends still don't. They think I'm joking. That's how hyper.I came out on Facebook - changed my 'Interested In', short post, Life Event. A friend messages me: 'Hey mate, I think you left your Facebook open on the uni computer.' Another: 'Very funny.' Someone asked if I was a basher trying to lure in prey.So many people spend years pretending to be straight; to hide themselves in plain sight. I didn't even have to pretend. I have a really deep voice, march rather than walk, obsessively watch televised sport, dress myself straight from my bedroom floor and generally couldn't look any straighter if I tried - and it all came naturally. I am a Kinsey 6, and literally no one ever guessed. I could have kept it up for a thousand years - it was a terrifying experience with a close friend that compelled me to come out. I have a 'gift' that so many closeted people would kill to have. Now that I'm out, it's a curse I'd wish upon no man. I am the least natural gay man on earth.I have nothing that could be classed as a common 'gay' interest. I know a smattering of other gay guys on a second- or third-hand basis and that's it. I've never been to a gay club for fear of looking foolish (and straight). I know nothing about anything 'gay'. Gay movies tend to lose my interest. The last gay-related TV show I actually enjoyed watching was 'Playing It Straight'. There is nothing gay about me whatsoever apart from my sexuality.(You can see where this is going...)I'm also a painfully shy kissless virgin with no game and two stone overweight (that used to be more, thank god something's going right). Haven't had sex, haven't been on a date, haven't kissed a guy. A perfect, unblemished record of chastity.Homosexuality was completely wasted on me. I wonder if I should even bother and just go live in a cave and try to forget the whole thing. I'm not resigned to being alone for the rest of my life (at least not yet), but I've accepted the possibility. I've even come to enjoy it at times (no commitments yay). I got to spend 8 hours hiking last weekend. It's looking like 18 hours this weekend.I don't expect a solution here. I just needed to have a good spray. Don't do what I did, kids. Don't go down the rabbit-hole that far.
Would I be out of line to ask the guy I'm seeing if he's seeing other people?
So I've been dating this guy for about a month now and I really like him. He has all of the qualities I've been looking for in somebody and every day he keeps finding new ways to flatter me.We went on a very romantic date last night and he had mentioned to me that I make him not want to drink. I asked him why that was and what he meant by it. He explained to me that when he drinks he seeks sex from other men. I didn't need to know that and I wish that he didn't mention that because now I'm always going to wonder what he's doing when he's out drinking. But I applaud him for his honesty.He also mentioned to me that he was seeing somebody and that it didn't work out but they were pretty serious. He said that other guy hit him up that same day wanting to meet up because he was moving. He told me he declined his offer because he respected me and said that if he were in my situation, that would hurt.Fast forward to the end of the night when he was dropping me off at home: we were in his car kissing and saying goodbye and after we kissed I saw him roll his eyes. I asked him why he rolled his eyes and he told me he didn't, but he was looking at his dirty window. I then turned and looked at his window. It had marks all over it like the back of somebody's head had been all over it. I know this from personal experience. I recall him telling me a few weeks ago that he'd just cleaned his windows.Having that been said, I now wonder: is he seeing other guys on the side for sex? Should I ask him this? I understand that he has no obligation to me because he's not my boyfriend, but at the same time I'm not down with double dipping and I'd rather end things now (depending on what he says), rather than later when I'm more emotionally invested. The marks on his window were blatantly obvious as to what they were, I know he had just cleaned his windows (why lie about that) but it contradicts his statement from earlier. So I'm confused.I've been in many situations where I've been with other guys to find out I'm being used in ways like this. To be honest I'm not sure if I'm reading into things too much, or I'm just trying to protect myself because I'm afraid of being hurt again.Any advice is greatly appreciated and thank you for reading all of this. Sorry if it kind of turned into a range toward the end.
2016. április 21., csütörtök
Im confused about my sexuality
The title says it all. In the past couple of weeks and months ive been going through peaks and valleys of depression and my sexuality has come into question more and more frequently. I've started to think I maybe gay but ive never been turned on by men. I love women and I love having sex and having fun with women but I just don't see myself as manly enough to be straight. I do want to kiss a guy just to experience it and see if i enjoy it or not. This whole ordeal has taken a huge toll on my productivity at work and I need to find results. What are some things I can do, and you did, to get a more clear understanding of who I am?
Guess age? Any guys that like me age?
Here's a picture of me today: http://ift.tt/1TmfedG age? do you think I could be considered a twink?
LGBTFC An LGBTQIA Discord Social and Gaming Community (Info)
Link to the Discord Server: http://ift.tt/1SxazWc is LGBTFC?We are a discord community that is for LGBTQIA+ people who want a place to hang out, talk and also play games with other people. We are accepting of all, so feel free to join :]! We have a great set of staff, so if there is ever something you have a question about or just need some help in general you can always ask :>Mission StatementCreating a friendly, positive and safe community for LGBTQIA+ people who may not have access to likeminded people or support in real life.Campaigning for LGBTQIA+ equality online, as well as pushing the awareness and visibility of other human rights issues.Creating an incredibly LGBTQIA+ inclusive space. All too often transgender, intersex, asexual and other varients of sexuality, gender or romantic interest are left out. We do not want this to be the case in our community, we are an LGBT+ community.Creating a platform for LGBTQIA+ people to showcase their talents, design and creations. We really want you to grow in our community, feel free to show off your creativity.Using gaming as a social medium, and pushing for the representation of LGBTQIA+ in online mediaWhat text channels are available? (We have an opt-in system with certain text channels)General Chat – Where majority of conversations take place, no topic etcTrans Chat – A safe space for our Trans* (Anyone allowed) members to talkEvents - We host community events, online games and downloadable games (e.g TF2)Gaming – General gaming channel to discuss anything gaming and find other people to play games withMinecraft – Discuss anything minecraft related OR our own server – mc.lgbtfc.meRunescape – Discuss anything related to the game RS3/OSRSLeague of Legends – Discuss anything related to the game League of LegendsVenting – A channel that allows people to seek some support or just a place to get some stuff off their chestSelfies – Post your beautiful faces here :DCreative Arts – We have an area that allows people to post their creative mediums here, from art work to music creationOff-Topic Channels (Videos, Memes etc) – Off topic channels are also available, allowing you to post as many memes as you wantAnime – Want to talk about Anime, Manga or just Cartoons in general? Then this channel is for youTechtalk – Anything geeky, techie or just need some help with technology, can use this channelLGBT Education – From general LGBT Education, Sexual Health, How To Guides (Binding, Packing etc)-We also have the ability to select your own pronouns, allowing other people to see which pronouns you prefer to use.We hope you decide to join the community – It will be nice meeting you! :]Link to the Discord Server: http://ift.tt/1VM77JK
My school's assistant principal isn't allowing gay couples to go to prom together.
Basically, gay couples at my school can't go to prom together, which aside the fact that (we all know that) this is illegal, it's kind of weird to begin with since we even have a school-approved, official LGBT club, which is one of the bigger clubs at the school.I, along with most of the student base, and even some staff and teachers, am not sure what to about this. Some people have talked to the assistant principal about the topic, only to recieve a bs, stuck-up, discriminatory answer about how the students don't run the school, but rather the administration, so [s]clearly this assistant principal is allowed to do whatever they want[/s]. And yes, we (including this assistant principal) know that this form of discrimination (against gay rights) is illegal.I wasn't sure where to go to talk about this, so I just came to /r/gay. Hopefully you guys have some ideas on what we (the students / teachers) should do in order to allow all couples to go to prom. I'll update this whenever something happens. Thank you for reading.
Can "daddy" in gay slang mean refer to a young man?
My friend responded to my Facebook pic with "YASSS Daddy!" I'm assuming because he likes the way I look in the picture, but is the daddy term also used by many gays about younger men they find attractive? I usually thought it referred to hot older men but is it common to use when talking about younger gay men as well?
Going to the Gay Capital of Asia--- Bangkok in a couple of weeks
I am there for about 3 weeks and I really want to check out the gay area in Bangkok, pattaya and Phuket......Not interest in lady boys really... but want to meet the REAL boys!Any suggestions or tips from people that have been there?All comments are appreciated if they are kind.Thanks in advance!
2016. április 20., szerda
Grindr is out...Remain calm
Is anyone else's Grindr not working I can't connect. I'm in Melbourne Australia. I'm also pretty bored so give me some of your funniest Grindr stories.
Hiding feelings
Hi there! first time poster here and I thought I would ask for some advice (I think this is the right place to do it...)Anyway, I have some rather close friends who I talk with a lot and I guess I grew a crush on one of these friends... i'm almost certain he is 100% straight and not interested in a relationship with a guy. I've been feeling like this for a few months now (about 6-7) and can't take the pounding in my chest when I talk to them or the constant need for their attention.Now my question...Should I just let it be and deal with it until it hopefully passes? Would me admitting this to them have any chance of ruining our friendship? Should I admit this to them at all?I have absolutely no idea what to do with this...Apologies if this is posted a lot but I wanted to ask for some personal answers. Thank you! :D
All of these buff guys on grindr are reaching out to me and saying they'd love to meet. Are they real people?
OK, so I am a skinny 19 year old guy who a lot of people think is attractive but I do not think I am attractive. However, whenever I go on grindr, a lot of buff older guys sometimes 45-50 ask me to meet up. Are these people legit or are they predators or fake people?
Should GLB always be thrown in with the T in mainstream culture?
DISCLAIMER: I am NOT saying that the gay community SHOULD try to exclude those who identify as trans in any way.The thing I've been thinking about is that over the past 8 years or so in culture and now more recently in business, education, and a lot of areas, sexual orientation is being thrown in with gender dysphoria oftentimes in discussion with the LGBT acronym being used for convenience. While I know not all those who identify as transgender fall within the gender dysphoria diagnosis, I feel there is a fundamental "one of these things is not like the other" thing going on. This goes both ways for GLB being thrown in during discussions about the T and while I understand that there are cultural similarities of historical hardship faced by both communities, I am not sure this makes sense.They are two very different categories- one is about sexual orientation (LGB), the other is still technically considered a mental disorder by the majority of the psychological community. Now over the past few years, major progress has been made with achieving much more legal equality, social acceptance, and dignity for both groups of people all across western countries, but why should there be a T in LGBT? Clinically/psychologically/etc, they are two different things that are not related by subject. Culturally, we are both historically disadvantaged minorities, but we don't really see other groups getting lumped together in the same way I don't think (like being disabled with being asian american or something).So what is your sense on this? Do you think this is as it should be? Do you think it doesn't make sense but is not worth changing? Do you think it is but are too fearful to be called transphobic or bigoted to offer this question in public?
Should GLB always be thrown in with the T in mainstream culture?
DISCLAIMER: I am NOT saying that the gay community SHOULD try to exclude those who identify as trans in any way.The thing I've been thinking about is that over the past 8 years or so in culture and now more recently in business, education, and a lot of areas, sexual orientation is being thrown in with gender dysphoria oftentimes in discussion with the LGBT acronym being used for convenience. While I know not all those who identify as transgender fall within the gender dysphoria diagnosis, I feel there is a fundamental "one of these things is not like the other" thing going on. This goes both ways for GLB being thrown in during discussions about the T and while I understand that there are cultural similarities of historical hardship faced by both communities, I am not sure this makes sense.They are two very different categories- one is about sexual orientation (LGB), the other is still technically considered a mental disorder by the majority of the psychological community. Now over the past few years, major progress has been made with achieving much more legal equality, social acceptance, and dignity for both groups of people all across western countries, but why should there be a T in LGBT? Clinically/psychologically/etc, they are two different things that are not related by subject. Culturally, we are both historically disadvantaged minorities, but we don't really see other groups getting lumped together in the same way I don't think (like being disabled with being asian american or something).So what is your sense on this? Do you think this is as it should be? Do you think it doesn't make sense but is not worth changing? Do you think it is but are too fearful to be called transphobic or bigoted to offer this question in public?
Am I crazy for having this opinion?
If you're gonna say "I'm not homophobic, I have a gay friend" refering to me, our friendship is over. I'm not a tool to be used as a part of justification for your homophobia.
No Gay Flag?
Why isn't there a gay flag. The rainbow flag is a flag for the entire LGBT+ community right? But if so then there isn't a flag specifically for homosexuality? Or is being gay just a majority within a minority and there isn't a need for one? Or is the rainbow flag simply thought to symbolise homosexuality unless specified otherwise? Anyway I'm weird, and probably overthinking this...
I'm asexual and i got turned on and horny with the guy of the imageit is normal?
http://ift.tt/1QnrO7N it's the second time i got arroused by a body,and both were male...it is normal to be aroused by it because im asexual? Also,it want to have sensual contact and maybe sex,why?
Hey all! Euro gays I want your opinion!
Hey guys,I'm French and currently working on a research project on the perception by EU LGBT of their rights situation in their country.Every year, The Rainbow Index publishes a report which ranks each EU country based on their handling of LGBT rights and issues. I want to find out whether these results reflect reality. I would love it if you could help me do that.If you live in any European country and you're interested in giving me a hand (hehe) for this project, here are questions you should answer (you can PM me your answers if you'd rather):You can access the survey here1- How do you perceive the state of LGBT rights in your country? (Let me know how you feel on a daily basis at home and where you are from)2- How do you reach this perception? (What means do you use: personal experiences, social media, news, organisations...)3- Are you familiar with the Rainbow Index?If there is anything else you'd like to add, please feel free to do so!I'm also available on Kik for a chat, find me on: JoWhte.A million thanks and hoping to hear from all of you soon! Don't hesitate to ask questions.Smooches
Being Gay in Korea
Hey everyone! I just finished a video on my expereince being gay living in Korea. I tried to be as honest as possible. I shared all the resources I have for gay people living in Korea. I hope you enjoy it and that it helps some people out there! ^ PATMAX ADVENTURES https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuar4e2Swdotn_VnUjIQ_mg
Really confused about my sexuality
One of my friends kinda let himself go but I was looking at an old picture of him on the fridge and I almost let it slip and thought "wow! he used to be really cute". I have a lot of these moments where I will see a guy and think he's cute and even fantasize about them.The thing is, and I'm about to get a little graphic here, is that I can fantasize about guys but I have to stop right before I blow my load because it feels wrong. is this just social programming?also I experimented a little when I was younger (12 years old or so) and didn't really have any issues with it, I actually found it kinda fun. Any thoughts you guys?
Conflicted about liking a younger guy
As the title says, i recently met this young guy and as all young guys do, tend to fall for someone too easily. I myself am a 21 year old, nearly 22. I've had my fun, i'm over the whole needing to try new things and as i just said falling for someone so quick. So yeah, I guess I am interested in this guy who just turned 18 in January, he has told me he is interested as well. he isn't very experienced and i just did the usual things I'd do with any person I hooked up with. When I went over to his place, i mean i knew he lived with his parents and I didn't expect for it to go so well for the state that I was. I had been drinking for a few days, drugs, no sleep and it was just weird the moment In arrived I had a rockstar vodka in a slurpee cup. I was COMPLETELY myself, and he ended up giving me these beers he bought and his parents knew i was pretty drunk as well. Im no rowdy drunk, im pretty much the same just get a little louder and talkative as I drink more and do more drugs, but anyways. We spent the day together i ended up having more stuff and sure he did it with me, he had some things too. What I'm getting at is he took care of me when i came down, he fed me, he made me shower, it was really nice. Im a very affectionate guy so maybe he never felt like my intense affection but i can make you feel important. So, the night goes on(the first) and we just layed there kissing and just enjoying eachother until like 6?... in the morning, time kinda flew.Slept for a few. Im making myself seem terrible, but I hadnt ate for the past few days for i began drinking on thursday night, and it was saturday afternoon. The next day, he gave me some breakfast, we watched a movie (Finally watched V for vendetta), then we had a cigarette, and went back to bed. Apparently his parents think im good and i enjoy his house too, but now i know hes pretty much me, and i only enjoy alcohol, drugs and sex. Oh and hes an escort I became aware today. I dont care but I slightly do, we all have way of making money, just as long as im the one he cares for and I dont doubt that Im just hoping he tells me. Alright getting off track, I apologize I was supposed to have a BBQ with my sister and the people I live with but the propane tank and place to get more propane was closed and they wouldnt refill us when we got there 5 minutes before the store closed. Short story Im drunk and high. Anyways we had a smoke sesh just before I left, he was pretty adamant on me enjoying myself and making sure I got home safe, but Im 21 I didnt thing about it at the time but no ones really been that cautious about me in a while. So alright, ill just get to the point, this kid told me he liked me and i thought the same thing before he told me, but hes like adamant on being with me I just dont know if he needs that time to explore and im willing but of course ill be jealous and itll be hell knowing hes doing these things. Im just unsure, im certain ill try it out I just guess need some reassurance. Any advice sounds great lol
2016. április 19., kedd
Introducing the Boyfriend to Family.
Now me and my boyfriend have just had our 9th anniversary and in our time together we've only met each others parents and such.My external family so aunts and uncles and grandparents and cousins are asking when they'll see him and I keep telling him he works a lot, which he does work a lot, 5 days a week and two days off he doesn't get to choose.So he just got his days off for next week which happen to be on a day when I'm at school for 12 hours and the other day is my cousin's first communion.My entire family is expecting me to go even though I dont want to since the time I spend with my boyfriend is special and I dont spend as much time with him as I want.Now I brought it up with him and he told me he doesn't want to go as he's not very religious and he feels like he'll stand out in my family and feel awkward.Tricky thing is they'll have to ask me, "where's your 'friend'" or "where's your 'partner?'" Which both drive me insane as no one refers to him as my boyfriend but oh well, and they'll feel like he doesn't want to ever see him which isn't so much the case but at an event like that it makes him uncomfortable.I'm just in a shitty situation where I'm starting to feel like he never wants to see my family and I am a very family oriented person who grew up in a strong close family ,(which I found out he didn't and felt terrible for him) and it just sucks for me even though I may be over exaggerating this.What do you guys think and thanks for letting me speak my mind right now.
I'm supposed to be doing work... instead I'll post more of the ME and the LOVING and the HIM and the blah blah blah blah blah
'ight so for those that haven't seen my previous posts here...RECAP: Came out two months ago. Went on tinder. Thought it'd be stupid and I'd hate everyone. Found someone that is like me. We went out. I was nervous. I liked him. He likes me. Is now.Alright he's awesome... fuck I was gonna write more... buuut I guess that kind of wraps it up...Okay, maybe not. I am pretty vocal.I'm more used to walking in a room and taking charge of it rather than waiting for someone else to take charge. I think I'm pretty confident in 90% of things I do.And I was always really confused why my friends would say they'd be nervous or scared around a cute girl. And like, I TOTALLY GET IT.The first date I went on with him I felt like he was an alien creature that I was tasked with communicating my home world language with.Now I feel more comfortable with him, but I still feel like my heart beats just a TINY bit faster with him though. I don't think I can make that ever go away.But honestly my mad descent into a relationship with a guy has taken quite some time for me to stabilize with the idea of him being with me. And him liking me. But I kind of feel my mind has started to calm now so I can be with him and be relaxed and just be purely happy laying on a couch with him. Which is nice.I don't know. Do any of you have any similar stories of being nervous with the first guy you were dating?BTW apparently some of old friends found out I'm gay by following my reddit account? A bit weird... but whatever. Hi Joe/John/Brian.
Who only wants sex?
I would just like to see. I know I personally just want sex. And not even a lot of that. I mean not actively searching for a relationship and content to just have sex.I feel like those who are actively searching for a real relationship are pretty uncommon.
Sexy times wth a too big boy
So I met someone who is frankly too big for me. Every time we've done anything lately, unless i have a ton of prep time with a plug or something first, I just can't let him top me. It seems like it's cramping our relationship now since it takes a lot of spontaneity out of our love life. Does anyone else have this issue? How do you handle it?
Hot guys oh yea
So what do you guys find sexy in man? Not body wise more like the way they act mannerisms
I Don't Want to Hurt My Friend...
I'm gay, or at least bisexual, I really don't know. I'm out to most people in my life, including the vast majority of my friends. For the most part, they have been extraordinarily supportive if not a bit overly-enthusiastic (most of my friends are girls and I think some of them are kind of happy having a gay friend), but I have not come out to my best friend. This is because she's Muslim, but more than that, I know that she comes from a very anti-gay background (I'm majoring in Islamic Studies and talk to her a lot about her religion and her parents and she's told me their stances). Those who I am open with have been very good about not telling her, but I feel that she's beginning to suspect something, as stuff like this I feel can't be hidden forever. Now, I'm not only worried about her own feelings on this issue (she doesn't seem too judgemental of homosexuals but I'm not sure), but also about how our relationship may be viewed by others in her family or the Muslim community. If word gets out to them, I hope that it won't adversely affect her... I feel as if I fucked up royally coming out to anyone, and now I above all else don't want to hurt my very best friend... What should I do?
Unusual to laugh during sex?
Some background.I'm 22 and I started talking to someone 44. We hit it off and we had a lot of similar interests. He is an open relationship of nearly a decade. I was initially reluctant, but later on, as it happens to so many of us, I let my dick do the thinking and we hooked up. There were some technical issues but I enjoyed myself despite them and felt totally at ease.After the first time I started questioning the ethicality of what I was doing. He convinced me that, his partner was completely ok with and they dont mind sharing the physical aspects of their relationship with others. I met him a second time, we did the deed. I enjoyed myself (a lot) and ended up giggling and laughing like never before. Maybe because we had been talking for so long and it felt natural to laugh. I had a couple of orgasms and each time I couldn't help but burst out gasping/laughing. Later on the same evening, we started cooking and I met his partner who was totally cool. And for the first time I started to see how people make open relationships work.Which brings us to today, he said we need to talk about our last sexual encounter, and proceeded to let me know that he though laughing was unusual during sex and that he didn't want a repeat. I told him I respected his opinion, but that I disagreed and laughing is an important part of sex. I made it clear that I was NOT laughing at him, but rather because I was having such a great time.I'm not sure if he misunderstood and thought I was mocking him, or if laughing during sex is broaching some emotional barriers that he feels is only for him and his partner. (They don't have sex with each other for months)Is it weird to be laughing during sex? Am I being insensitive or missing something?Any advice is appreciated. :)
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