2016. január 31., vasárnap
I'm a Bicurious guy, but apprehensive about seeking out contact.
So, I'm sort of romantically involved with a girl now. We aren't dating now, but I see it down the road. Anyhow, I am pretty bicurious but haven't really told many people. I'm at a relatively small college now, but I'm sort of looking to explore this idea. I downloaded tinder, but the first prospective match was someone in my class. I'm kind of nervous about 'coming out' especially indirectly, I guess.Have any of you felt a similar way? Is there a more discrete way to entertain this idea? Thanks!
Hit me up if u want to have a great talk;)
Im New to this sub and want some people to chat with if u are free send me some texts and lets have a chat;) My Number is 6038459232
Desensitized
I miss being sixteen sometimes. I used to get so hot and bothered by the sight of a hot, shirtless man. And now, it's like I have to be touched by a hot guy to feel very excited. Now, those super hot, super ripped dudes mostly make me yearn a little bit, but also make me feel like shit for not being that hot.
Is being a thin guy that bad?
Like everyone talks about the stupid skinny fat syndrome, but like having 13-14% BF and being 145 lbs, I just find it annoying. Guys say I am attractive a lot, but I find the people who just obsess over everyone being too "thin" or skinny fat to be annoying and doesn't face matter more. Looks are only one part of the picture, but people never seem to get that.
Bottoming Problem
My boyfriend and I have been going out for about 7 months now and we like to explore different things sexually. One of the biggest issues that we have been having is him trying to bottom after being a complete top his whole life. He finds it extremely painful and despite trying things like AnalEze, rimming and massaging down there, it still seems like too much for him to bear. His painful facial expressions also make me limp, which only further adds on to the issue. Do you guys have any recommendations for us? Any advice is greatly appreciated!
My father has disowned me
So it took him about 10 years, but he finally has disowned me because of me being Gay. When I came out to him about 10 years ago he didn't understand it, but he just wanted my happiness flash forward to 2011 he marries my new stepmom and ever since then she has indoctrinated with anti-Gay stuff and made him super religious (like borderline Westboro bad). He posts on Facebook about how he hates that god has been taken out of everything and Muslim propoganda is being taught instead, and this went on in a World History class, a class where you can learn about different cultures. I see no issue about it, so I spoke up about it and he said that I am misguided and that my mother & I will go to hell and that I am disowned, so I texted him and quoted Luke Skywalker and said "then my father is truly dead." Some people lose their father to cancer, to car crashes or to murderers, I lost mine to a cult. Thankfully I have a mother who is supportive. He has blamed her for my being Gay. my brother (who is not his son) wants to kick his ass for what he did. I'm not truly bothered as he was a piece of shit anyways and he believed that beating up a child was the best discipline.
feel kinda isolated
so, im attracted to females. im not very attracted to males. just as a general rule. but i am a bottom, who cant stand vaginas. they just aint right. im repulsed by them. on the other hand, i love dick @.@ big ones, medium ones..... big ones... im very attracted to mtf trans individuals, and androgynous males.the reason i have explained that... is because when im with my gay friends, i feel like i dont quite fit in. i find muscles and masculinity basically unattractive. now, there are exceptions, but just as a general rule.you also may have noticed i said i was a bottom.i feel like a mixed up and unfortunate mutant.. and im curious is there anybody out there who is similar.also... this may be sexist, but its just my preferences.. i dont like the average female personality. guys are just better.
Getting rid of body hair.
Hey guys. 26 year old twink looking guy here. Body hair has been coming in around my belly and chest lately but it's really not looking that good to me. What's the best way to get rid of it? I don't wanna shave because that doesn't look good to me. Any reccomendations? Thanks.
2016. január 30., szombat
[Discussion] What is the worst part of being gay?
I think most people can agree there are some very non-ideal aspects of being homosexual in the society we live in; that's just kind of assumed. But a straight friend of mine asked me today what the worst thing about being gay is, and I didn't know how to answer him. Thoughts?
Tell me what you think?
Tonight, I have learned something very important that I feel should really inform me as I go forwards. I learned that ultimately, my fate belongs to me. For the past 6 years, I have always thought of myself as the land around me. At camp, I was the victim of the horrible camp administration, campers, counselors, and horrible directors. I cried often and felt upset, and yes the camp was bad, but my own reaction was just as bad and inappropriate for the situation. This has stuck with me and I have learned from these actions that they should not be repeated. Then in 8th grade, I became the victim of the jerky girls, the middle school, the jerky boys, and numerous stres. While not taken out in the form of panic attacks in high school, the same situation did occur. After, in high school, I lost it totally throughout. I was trapped in my own head, and never saw the bigger picture. I was stuck in the horrible bubble of what was called high school. The numerous stresses of mean students who would exclude me, no friends, body image problems, stress to perfect the next test academically, teachers who would abuse their power, a schedule that trapped me basically in house arrest for 4 years, and abusive and creul tae-kwon-do teachers kept me consistently on my toes but also misreable, depressed, and repulsive. I became self absorbed, depressed, and threw numerous temper tantrums. And I did it because I felt it was the only thing I could do. I felt powerless and out of control. My enviornment was not what I wanted, and I was so self obsessed that I felt trapped, bored, and useless. Being gay and trying to come out did not help either (although I did eventually come out in 10th grade). However, I am aware of the mistakes I have made the past couple of years and am ready for change and know that I am the only person who can make it happen. I successfully got good grades, feigned an interest, and got into a great school. I have 15 weeks of high school and while they may not be easy because the enviornment is not ideal, I need to learn how to mannage the pain of it and survive. I cannot become the victim of myself and my enviornment. While the people and the situation around me are difficult, conceited, and often times ludicrous, my reaction if I just choose to become the victim will just end up being the same. And in college, rather than obsess over what is hurting me, I am going to learn to write it down, put it in a different place, and slowly learn from it. I am going to meditate, do yoga, and learn from the inner power of the universe. I have an interest and I am ready to make it happen. And while managing all of this could end up being hard, I am slowly going to learn to do it. I know this is a rant but I had to put it out in writing. Tell me what you think!
Have you ever questioned your gender identity?
Hi, Im currently having a rough time right now because I am questioning my gender identity. When I was young I wanted to be a girl up until a point where I learned about homosexuality, then I identified myself with that. Im wondering if anyone out there have had a childhood where they wanted to be a girl then when they found out about gayness they realized that it was what they were. Ive read a lot of places that if you think youre trans you probably are, and it scares me because I dont want to be trans. When I think about what it will bring it makes me suicidal. At the same time Im scares that I am and that Im supressing it. Maybe I have a problem with femeninity and that I do not allow myself to be fem because of the gay macho standard? Anyways I need advice. Im drunk so sorry for bad grammar or whatever.
Although there is no such thing as a "gayometer" I feel like I get it right a lot of the time.
I, as a gay person, cannot get it correct every time if someone is gay. There are always exceptions, of course. However, I feel as if I am able to get it right about 95% of the time. What I look for is: -A lack of interest in sports for some people (notice how I said some because plenty of gay people are interested in sports. however, this is not a credential for being gay or even a total signal but leads to another step to see if the person could be gay which is listed below. -interests in activities such as ballet, fashion, sometimes theatre and art (these don't as much lead me to think someone is neccessarily gay but leaves the option open). -has friendships with both boys and girls, but seems to have the best friendships with girls because they seem to understand them better -high pitched voice, the obvious gay lisp. if not high pitched, a voice that conveys feeling and usually uses at least some intonation. If quiet, still has at least some sense of emotion. -supports LGBT groups or really does not support LGBT groups. -people who are closeted may feign interest in girls in fashions that can sometimes seem ludicrous and overexaggerated. check to see if the person is interested. -cares about physical appearance in some way, but more than just being jacked. cares about the overall image. -actually forms a connectionCan any of you think about any other possible things for a gayometer. I know some people may find this offensive, but I don't actually as a gay person. Thank you!!
My coming out story
Forewarning, this is a long post and there isn't a tl;dr since it really can't be shortly summarised :)I've seen a few posts before about this so going to share mine as well :) before I start, I came out almost two years ago to my family and just over that to my close friends.So, I met my bf online (3 years ago) while I was at uni and curious. It took a while to let things settle in for me and after a year I realised that it wasn't a temporary thing - I loved the man and was gay. At the time I lived with my family, so I didn't tell them since I was aware that their opinions (particularly my dad's) were not all that positive. After I graduated and moved out, I met my bf (who had moved abroad for work) for a week and by the time I came back, I felt that I was ready to tell my family that I was gay.So, I waited until my dad had left house to break the news to my mum, who I thought would be more amenable to the news. She was silent for a long while after I said that I'd met a guy and was gay, and unfortunately my dad walked back in too early, meaning that I had to tell him as well. After some awkward silence and attempts to ask them if they wanted to ask me anything, I left them to talk to themselves.A few hours later, my mum came up to talk to me. She said that it was a shock, and it would take them time. I was ready for that - I knew it would take time. But then she said that my dad had described it as if "a son had just died". Long story short, I left the house that evening in tears shortly after that, and ended up at my best friends house with a strong cup of tea (yes, I'm English) to calm down.The following half year that followed was very uncomfortable, with my dad refusing to acknowledge my presence when I visited and, after some time, my mum making an effort to be supportive and even (to my extreme surprise) volunteering to meet the man who had changed my life.Now, it will be almost two years since I told my parents about me, and things have improved a lot. My mum has now met my bf a few times and often asks me how he is doing, and has really made an effort to be accepting. My dad took a long time before he would even look me in the eye, but he does talk to me now and is willing to help out with day to day things when I'm over. He still will not permit my bf to be in the house, but since I have my own place I'm not so worried about this, but it's a shame that he still hasn't fully accepted (nor, I suspect, ever will fully accept) my life choice in the regard.So, that's my story. Sorry it's so long, but thank you very much for reading this far :) I think that my advice for anyone wishing to come out is that even if it seems like your family won't take it well, time helps so much because they can see you are the same person as before, just that it is your life to live as makes you happy, and at some point they have to accept you for who you are.
Came out to my wife (update)
So. It happened. I came out to my wife a few hours ago. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. But I feel better already. My wife is devastated and hurting, and that is not fun. But she admitted to knowing something has been wrong for a while now. We said we loved each other, hugged and cried together, and we agreed I am staying in the house for the foreseeable future. That felt amazing! It's not going to be easy, though.I want to thank everyone who gave me input on the letter. It helped tremendously. I am glad that I waited until half way through the letter to say I am gay because she literally heard nothing after I said that. She sobbed. She was more afraid I was going to leavened than anything. As of now, we want to be partners in this family and in life and see what comes of it. I love her more now than ever.I feel lighter and more like myself than I have in a long time. Thanks again!
ugh.
why is it so hard to talk to people? I used to be able to hold conversations and be so charming or what the hell ever and now I'm just an awkward mess it feels like. I'm only 22 years old and I have no idea how to talk to other guys my age or around my age. my recently ended relationship was with a 36 yr old and well... I forgot how to speak to people my age. if that makes any sense? . and it doesn't help that I'm really not very confident. and I feel like everyone around me lives a completely different life than I do wich I don't fit into. and I mean this in the best, judgeyless way possible.. but everyone around me is kinda like a pop culture worshiping, frilly, too tight clothes wearing, obnoxious, phoney zombies or super duper obnoxiously closeted married men... and I'm just some goofy dude who only likes rock music and video games and movies and from what I've gathered, I don't really fit into their culture and frankly they are pretty quick to push me aside. even my last bf wasn't the best for me.. obviously. I had to assimilate to him and he never tried to embrace any aspect of who I was and what I enjoyed. anyway what I'm getting at is I don't fit in with anyone around me and It's making me very lonely.
2016. január 29., péntek
Tips
So I am looking for some body shaving tips. What's the best way to get every thing smooth and soft
Were you offended by "it's none of my business" in support of gay people?
I'm 41 (straight) and remember from my entire childhood in the 80's to the coming of age in the 90's whenever the question was asked "do you think he's gay?" the appropriate PC answer was always "It's none of my business". While I agree with the sentiment, I have always felt it a cop out, as if to say "I don't have to have/express an opinion"?
Should I try explaining how I feel to this person?
OK, I am a senior in high school about to go to college. I befriended this girl and said I was gay in October. We spoke mostly on facebook and by text message. In October-December, we spoke mostly online and phone with text but occasionally saw each other at school and said hi and spoke. She commented on lots of my facebook and instagram posts. I liked her a lot and I told her some secrets and I even offered to bake her a cake for getting into college. She said she'll always be there for me. However, this month, I sent 5 text messages. 2 were responded to very late with barley nothing, and 3 were not even responded to. I saw her at schools numerous times but she never said hi, and if I said hi and tried to have a conversation, she would have it but act like she didn't know me that well. Today I saw her in a transparent room where I was sitting all by myself and she was about to come in but when she saw me she looked me in the eye but didn't wave, turned the opposite direction and went to sit with another group of people that it looked like she had maybe been trying to avoid by going into the room I was in. Then, in a class I sit near her in where she barley spoke with me for the whole month, it was just me her and another girl. I spoke to the other girl and the original girl I texted said nothing to me when it was just the 3 of us, and nothing when in class where I sit right next to her. I am not sure if I should talk to her. Maybe she is mad but the way this is being done seems inappropriate. I don't know if I am thinking too deeply into this but I feel kind of used and I said things that were personal to me and I feel like I should be treated better. Should I speak with this person and explain what I am thinking? We are almost leaving high school and a fake relationship doesn't matter to me. Thanks for helping!
straight guy first time bottom tonight
I have been craving an anal experience for a long time and tonight its going to happen. Any tips or advice to help me enjoy my experience? Or if you have stories or similar experiences I would love to hear from you.
Feeling alienated amongst other gay people
I don’t even know where to start. I guess that may be the part of the problem.I’m a 21 y.o from a semi-orthodox eastern EU country. I’m gay since forever, elementary school probably, if you count eyeing friends in the locer rooms. Divorced parents, good material status, closeted on the outside, apart from friends and people I know I can convey that secret upon (mostly other fags), don’t know what else could I bring up.It’s been like that since forever. My whole adolescence/puberty has been marked with the overwhelming feeling of inferiority to other gay people. I feel like a complete alien. I always thought this was obviously connected to me being the little overweight boy, but since I recently lost weight to the point that, with appropriate clothing, I can pass as fuckable and I’m getting thiner by the day due to my diet, I’m worried at the apparent lack of improvement whatsoever.I just feel like I got the “bad” parts of being a queer without the benefits that follow. I’ve never been the good-dressed one, my taste is mediocre and weird due to how I’m really not that close to the pop-culture. Years went by and I watched these other, cheerful, bright gay kids I secretly envied develop into beautiful adults, full of life and energy. In the meantime, I struggled with trying not to give in to despair and to find the reason for why things were the way they were. I remained forever as the guy who is “witty, intelligent even, but also not really the anyone’s type”.I found no answer. I just saw many wonderful pairs of young people, who were neither boring (which I thought was a prerequisite to finding a partner) nor ugly (which would give them “stability out of lack of choice”) and, most of whom last for years already (which takes away the feeling moral superiority over promiscuous gay people). I can’t keep on forever making excuses as to why they can and I can’t, other than feeling I lack something. Maybe the looks, maybe the “cool” factor, perhaps both.I’ve had my fair share of sexual adventures; it’s not like I’m ugly as hell, I just loose to those blessed with the twink-type bodies. In the recent year, even after the weight program startet taking its toll on my precious fatty tissue, I ceased any type of intercourse, kinky or not (like any a looser out there I’m kinky as fuck). I just can’t stand being taken “as an exception”, under drugs or by someone with a dry spell, or in a club. While I’d of course like to let my twisted imagination run amok in the reality, I don’t feel like I have something valid to offer.Despite what it may look like, the post is not really meant to be a rant, since self-pity is pathetic and leads to nowhere, and so does the pity of stragners. However, perhaps, someone’s insight, a story, a piece of advice, a figment of knowledge may tell me what to do, how to change, outside of the ever important looks (have abs or die; I giggle whenever I hear about “unfair standards for women looks”). I just see so many gay people living a life I’m incapable of living. It feels extremely frustrating to feel repulsive and at the same time not really knowing the reasons.Disclaimer: 1. Not a native, sori for me englado 2. Yes, I tried both the antidepressants (no real change, which is unsurprising since my depression, if such exists, is clearly not of endogenic nature.) and therapy, thrice, which didn’t really solve a thing either. 3. In advance, I’d like to reply to the “looks don’t matter, it’s the inside that counts”, “you’ll find someone I swear” etc. – sorry if that makes anyone offended, but that’s just fairy tales. Things change because something about them was done or happened; no amount of feel-better bs will make it otherwise. And, looks DO matter, greatly so, especially when talking about the age group of 18-29 horny young males. Anyone who disagrees is, with a high probability, trying to protect his/her ego from the painful truth, and that just won’t do.
Small coming out story. Hope you enjoy!
Hi everyone, this will be the first time telling anyone about my situation, this will be a tiny story and will mostly revolve around the sexual nature of my gayness (idk if that's the right word to use haha). I hope you guys enjoy this read, grammar is not my strong point so just bear with me if I make mistakes. Without further adieu enjoy my (semi) coming out story :)Ok so my name is Rob, I'm 19 and a closet bi. I have never told anyone about this, to everyone that knows me, I am as straight as a pole. I don't take negative judgement irl, but online I use it to improve my life. I am not 100% gay, I'm more like 70-30 (straight-gay) so I'm bi, so hopefully I'll still be accepted in this subreddit. I am not i attracted to male-male relationships, only the sex part. I've been watching straight porn for a very long time now (as most people do) and I've always had a fascination for whenever she has her way with guy's dick and when guy finishes on the girl. They just make it seem so appealing and hot.For the past couple of months I've been dreaming more and more about myself being in that position and pleasuring the guy so hard that he would finish like that on me [or even in me ;)]. However I don't plan on trying this with a guy in real life just yet, I want to start slow and take it one step at a time.I just want to state that I'm not looking for a relationship with men, I am ONLY looking for a relationship with women, but sexually I don't discriminate genders and I hope you can respect my view.I am really hoping if someone of you guys could reply to this giving me your thoughts about my situation or how you could help me further this new openness if need be. If anyone wants to talk to me I only really use kik to communicate with new people and nothing else. So pm me and we could start talking. We can become friends and talk about anything from everyday news, to even the most explicit of fantasies.Hopefully you enjoyed this small story and maybe hear from some of you!
2016. január 28., csütörtök
dating profile advice
be aware of the subliminal messages you are sending in your profile pictures. some of the stuff i see people put up there immediately makes me feel like we live in completely different worlds. you standing in front of the Eiffel tower or being someplace i would not be anywhere close to being able to afford... i work for a living and my time and money are limited, as are, i imagine, most guys'. dont get me wrong, im not complaining, cause it does not hurt me one bit. if you arent getting alot of messages or people arent responding though... might wanna do an evaluation of the subtexts you are sending.good luck ;) <3~!
Fears of Coming Out
Hello Reddit.So i just wanna say i came out two years ago and it was the best decision I ever made.This post is what i would have wanted to read years ago. Coming out is one the hardest thing you will ever do, but by far the best. The fear you will go through is intense, the weight that gets lifted with every word you say will make it all worthwhile, you will feel weightless... I did anyway.. I used to lurk on this subreddit looking for advise, looking for funny ways to come out, how to deal with the aftermath etc.. Again it's the hardest thing you may ever do, but it's also the best...I was born to parents, my mother in catholic Ireland, and father in the protestant church so coming out always seemed like an impossility.. But they both accepted me and its as if nothing ever happened.The support in the gay subreddit community is overwhelming, I would still be in the closet if it weren't for reddit. This is a new account so all the previous posts no longer exist but I hope the small few people who read this feel inspired or encouraged to move forward.I'm no expert but I hope I helped someone along their path.Much Love xx
I'm gay and born in to a super Christian family. How can I break it to them without it being too crazy?
I've been harboring this secret for about 19 years now. I can't take living a lie much longer. Can anyone help me out here?
Why is it that many heterosexual people can't understand (though accept) how being attracted to the same sex works, but vice versa...
Firstly, I am writing this with the presupposition of countries where homosexuality is not universally condemned / discriminated etc.It's a brief discussion I've had with one of my best friends. Just saying, I do not blame anyone for not understanding, how could I? Now, I want to emphasise the discrimination between "understand that it can biologically be the case" and "put oneself in a gay's shoes". And it's about the latter.I think it is merely odd that, while many straights can't seem to get the hang of it, I, for one, can perfectly understand how someone can feel attracted to a woman (though I myself do not). I think I am just missing something essential here. Is it caused merely by the fact that society is, for the most part, heterosexual and therefore people who are not affected don't ever have to think about it growing up? And that many homosexuals only at some point in there youth (for example) become aware of their sexuality, and having only been confronted with heterosexuality have developed a deceptive sense of understanding?And don't get me started on the fact that people can't differentiate between aesthetic beauty and sexual appeal. I find the fact despicable that it is so direly stigmatised, as a heterosexual, to find a man attractive (and state it). I don't see where this direct association with "feeling sexually attracted to someone" comes from, but it sures has made a felt 80% of male heterosexual population completely incapable of openly saying whether a man is good-looking. From my experience, anyway.I hope I do not sound all too naive - just stuff to philosophise about, really, but I do wonder.
snapchat play for bottom gays
Hi, what's up for any bottom, sissy, femboy, ladyboy and all horny sissies who want dirty talk and snap chat, add me on snapchat: sharg4wiyoung & soft sluts are preferable ;)
Dealing with an 'open' relationship?.
Ok so I pretty much fell in love with the man of my dreams just under 2 years ago and from the first time we met, we stated that we didn't want any secrets between and it wouldn't be a strict monogamous relationship (we both believe that people aren't designed to be monogamous).I am happy for him to have his freedom as long as he isn't doing anything that will affect us as a couple (screwing random guys from those 'apps' or arranging anything when we are supposed to be together or finding out I have an STD from him because he was doing stuff with others). We don't live together yet as we love our own space to much (but do spend the entire weekend together) and since we became a couple I just haven't felt the need to play with anyone else, where he been with a few other guys, they are all guys I know of and have just been spur of the moment things. He has always told me when and what happened.In previous relationship I have always been the one with the lying and the sneaking around which is why I have always said as long as there is honesty between us then its ok to play.But every time he does, I start over thinking the situation and my brain goes off on a tangent thinking about anything and everything. I know in my heart that our relationship is about as solid as it can get, I want to spend the rest of my life with this guy, I love everything we do together, we do all the normal couple things and I love that.So my question to you lovely people of this sub, is how can I stop focusing on the non-existent negatives that I make up in my head when he does have fun, at the end of the day that is all it is.... fun.I suppose I should mention that I have quiet low self worth, I will honestly never feel like I deserve to be with such an amazing person, mixed with some body dysmorphia (I really don't like the way I look body or face wise, but yet ironically enough when I play with myself I love doing in front of a mirror lol)Anyone else in an 'open relationship'? Although I don't consider it 'open' its just more if the mood takes you kind of thing.
2016. január 27., szerda
I Need Advice
Ok, I really need advice on this. I'm Bi, liked girls and boys from a young age (20 almost 21 now) I have only felt an attraction to guys twice. The first was when I was 16 and that fell apart after a year because I kept it inside and everyone knew, even him probably but we all kind of stopped talking to eachother. But now I met my friend almost 2 years ago and for some reason from the moment I saw him I knew what I felt. He isn't even the best looking, there's just something about him. But we grew over the past 2 years and are practically best friends now. We do every thing together and we both get each other into new things. I convinced him to buy a Mustang (we're in a mustang club) and got him into airsoft. But the more I talk and hang out with him the more and more I want to tell him how I feel. I really want to be with him. And to be honest, we talk to each other pretty much every day on Skype alone for hours. We went to South Dakota a few months ago (We live in NJ so its a long trip) for 3 weeks with my parents. And he asked me to go to Boston with him and his family for Thanksgiving but some stuff got in the way. My question is, should I tell him how I feel? Should I let the friendship grow and hold my feelings inside? We're always talking about moving out and getting an apartment in the Fall with some friends, and have a bunch of trips planned for the summer for car related events and shows and what not. I don't want to ruin what I have because he honestly is the best friend I have ever had and I really don't know what I would do without him. It sucks because sometimes he gives me mixed feelings, he's had a girlfriend before for 2 years, but sometimes he says things that make me wonder. We go out alone a lot of the time and hang out one on one. He's had some rough family stuff happen the last few weeks and as far as I know I'm the only person he has told. He was talking about going to Boston for a weekend to take a trip and see a band next year. Everything he does he says "we" a lot. So I need some help here. I really want to just tell him everything but I know that could end it all and it could be disastrous, but that chance that maybe, just maybe it might work out gives me that glimmer of hope.
Do any guys here play around with make up?
These days the urge to go out and try some make up has been getting stronger. I love watching make up tutorials and shit, and I'd just love to try some. Does anyone else have this urge or actually do it? I suppose growing up with an older sister has never helped, ha! I'd love to buy myself some white nail polish. Any sites/blogs/subreddits dedicated to this kind of stuff?
Guys! We need your input!
Same-sex marriage is finally legal in the U.S., but we still need to make sure that programs are improved and created to support same-sex attracted men and their partners! If you identify as male, are 18 or older and have dated a man or are currently are dating a man, please take this survey. The goal of this research study is to understand romantic relationships among men. It will only take about 10 minutes. Visit http://bit.ly/guyswholoveguys to start the survey now!
Am I letch?
Hi everyone,This is my first post in reddit, so I'm not sure how to start it. Here's the thing, ever since I began to masturbate at 9 there hasn't been a week when I haven't done it at least five times. There were times when after three wanks in a row I still wanted to wank but I was affraid because usually about that time I'd cum without actually cum... if that makes sense... But I am cool with that, It is really akward when I have a family trip or something but it's not such a big deal. However when I started having sex (which was pretty recently because I wasn't openly gay) it totally change, I could have sex once and be satisfied for I week. But then I leave my hometown, I started university, I got a room for myself in a shared flat and I started dating a guy. And last year was all about fucking, like every single day of the week and whenever I spend the weekend in my hometown was all about sending pictures and locking myself in the bathroom. But now he has more work, I have more projects, and I spend the day pissed off for not having sex. I should mention that I couldn't keep on monogamy for more than two months as I was enable to imagine myself not fucking with random guys, even thought I already fucked almost every day.So I guess my question is: Am i just a teen giving too much importance to sex? Is this ""normal""?
I may have asked my crush out by accident :/
So im still in the closet, but may have accidentally asked my crush out to a movie this friday. He's openly gay, but i don't know how he feels towards me. Advice?
My coming out message to my wife - work in progress
Honey,I have been unfair to you. I have built up a wall around myself, and I have told you I am sad, depressed and anxious, and I haven't been able to tell you why. I know you can't possibly understand why that is, and you have been probably tortured by it. After putting myself in your shoes, I have decided it is time to tell you why I have been so blue. Before I do, I need to give you a little context.15 years ago, we married, and it was one of the happiest days of my life, next to the birth of our two children. You were and still are my best friend and soul mate. I love you. I always loved you. I always will. The same goes for the kids. I regret nothing. We have a wonderful family, and you are a perfect wife and mother.As you know, i often times become blue and depressed. I always blamed this on general anxiety. I don't think this was really untrue. It's just that the winter deepened what I always was able to keep down.As I get older, that feeling gets longer and deeper, and this year, it's more scary. I know that this is because I now fully accept what it is. To help you understand, I have taken to having little mini breakdowns in the bathroom or in the car alone. I have had a harder time keeping those crying fits hidden from you. I am truly hurting and depressed because I have not felt that I could share this with you, my best friend.It is time to bring you in to what has been bothering me, but it is going to come at great personal pain to you. I hope that once you get over the shock, we will be able to help each other deal with the truth about me that I have hidden from myself, from you, our kids, our family, and our friends.That truth is that I am gay. I always knew there was something different about me, and I suppressed it because of attitudes when we were growing up and probably because of my dad's homophobia. Until recently, I always made easy friends with girls and never with guys. I always unconsciously suppressed the glances at the same people who turned your head at the beach or elsewhere. I have feared being caught doing these things. I have had fantasies that I pushed out of my head the second I had them. I have had unhealthy dialogue with myself that has tried to convince me I am straight. None of these things are things that straight people do. This is what has caused the steady decline in our sex life, not anything that is wrong with you or that you need to fix. You are more beautiful than ever and as vital as ever. In fact, you are more so than when we were married.I wish I knew where this brings us going forward. I love you, and I want us to work that out together. I know you will be sad, but I don't want you to be alone, as I have been (which is my own fault). I am here when and if you want me. I am just as scared about this revelation as you are. I am not sorry for it, but I am devastated about what it could mean.Please keep the dialogue going for our kids and our marriage and friendship. When we are both ready, we can talk more about how to deal with this and what we each want. I don't want to lose you or our family. I hope you feel the same.Love,Your husband
Hi I'm 20 and was straight all along, but today I finally gave my first blow job and it was quiete an interesting experience.
Hello so I see myself as a bisexual and was curios about everything. I dunno but I found him on the internet and we were visiting a public toilet where we did it. I let him came in my mouth but had to split it all out right after. I dunno how to feel, I dont regret it I just feel numb. Any similiae storys? The thing is I really was into that.. made dirtytalk and such. I liked it and he said I was good
Chemically Altered Production's GRIND
a short musical film. I just finished, still wrapping my head around it.http://ift.tt/1VqXRID
Not sure if this is the right place, but I just got hit up by a 19 year old on Scruff...
I'm almost 30 with a graying beard.I usually only date and talk with older men, but for the first time a 19 year old reached out to on Scruff and wanted to hook up. I didn't think it would happen, but I guess I'm almost "Daddy" material.I'm a bit shocked, I guess.
2016. január 26., kedd
Gay Arab
Hello,I'm an atheist gay arab man and i can't express my true beliefs or not participate Islamic activities because if i did that i will be judged, shunned, harassed and possibly hurt by the all the muslim people around me, i am also gay and i can't have a healthy sexual relationship with the person i feel attracted to because in my country gay people caught practicing gay acts are sent to jail, i wish i can move away from my country and go to any other place that can accept who i am like the US, how can i do that?
My open letter to the HRC. What you have become and why you no longer have my support.
Never really posted on Reddit before, but felt so impassioned lately by the Clinton endorsement and the HRC's response to being called establishment (30 years lobbying-- that doesn't make you establishment), that I Had to share. Here it is in its entirety."To whom it may concern,I would like to promptly be removed from your mailing and Text message alerts systems. I no longer support your non-profit as it no longer supports my vision. The current endorsement of Hillary Clinton was the straw the broke the camel's back. She and Bill, while now being advocates and strong ones for the gay community, have nothing compared to the support of Bernie Sanders. The only member of congress to have advocated for full LGBT rights from his earliest days in office.It is clear that the HRC is and has decided to side itself with the wealthy establishment side of the Democratic party that thankfully is dying off and being replaced with a new strong Progressive majority. A majority dedicated to what is the core cause of all ignorance and strife, an unaccountable wealthy class that oppresses and divides the lower poorer classes.I am a gay male from a poor rural, WASP background. I have fought on the front lines to have even the slightest voice. The HRC was a beacon growing up that gave a glimmer of hope to those of us that never thought being accepted was possible. But now that organization has become fat off the new superpac world we live in, pandering to wealthy donors and politicians a like. And we all know that had the Republican party stayed secular, the HRC as it is now and it's selfish endeavors would now be a Republican lobbyist group.I do not support the elitists, rich white-man and I sure as hell do not support elitists, rich, GAY white men. The HRC no longer supports diversity or equality. Instead it has decided to support mediocrity and the status quo. Siding with the socio-economic behemoth, instead of fighting with your constituents.The majority of the GLBT community is not wealthy, is not influential. We are poor, we are working to make the bills. We are suffering at the bottom with so many other HUMANS that you should be supporting. HUMAN rights, are the rights to a livable wage as a single person. HUMAN rights, are the rights to live without fear of knowing you have money to pay rent next month. And with that noted, we finally have a candidate that has been fighting for this all his life and your ignorant management team sides, instead, with a candidate that accepts millions from the very same companies that for years fought our causes. Wall street is on no ones side.It is this poor lack of judgment by your management team that I now write to have my name removed from your mailing list and to revoke my support. This decision does not come without a burdened heart, but It is time for a new group of humans to rise and take over where you have failed. I put my hope and future in their hands, not in those of a group that would keep the status quo and endorse tax dodging corporations and politicians. The same corporations and politicians that we fought so hard against to get our rights.Sincerely,J. G."
I need some advice.
Hello guys. I'm a student in high school. This year I met a wonder teacher, my history teacher, and I have always connected with him, but i'm starting to develop actual feelings for him. The only issue is, I'm straight... I've never thought a guy was cute or had a crush on a guy, only girls... However I find my teacher to be hot and charming... I'm not sure what's going on with me or what.. I'm always sleepy and I don't pay attention in any of my other classes -- but his, I could never be more awake and ready to hear anything he says. Thank you in advance for replying, and this is a throwaway account for obvious reasons
So how does all this work out when your ugly?
So whenever I see all these stories of the athletes coming out and being accepted by his peers or just things getting better for people in general, the guys are always conveniently gorgeous.So how does it work out for ugly people like me? From my experience, no one give a shit, or cares, or even gives you a second glance. You get ignored, laughed at or get shit talked behind your back. So I'm just wondering when all the joy, acceptance and happiness starts coming into play when ur an ugly gay guy?
Opinions on NoFap? My fellow gays?
I am a curious bee and browse the web, reddit in particular and I stumbled upon /r/nofap. Which I find to be very interesting. I wouldn't say I'm addicted or controlled by porn, but after doing nofap for 3 days I had the hardest bleep bloop in my pants. I only started touching myself seriously in college and truly being gay. So I feel like I missed out on the masturbating part, which is amazing. I masturbate like once every two days around night time. I wouldn't say it controls me, but its nice. What are your opinions on NoFap?
Guy I knew for long time just came out...
I am in high school, and there was this guy that I used to go to school with in elementary (grade 1-8). I knew him for a long time, and we weren't really friends, but I thought he was kind of a jerk, jock-type personality, but we talked sometimes. He was really athletic, and often talked like he was attracted to girls. Closer to grade 8 he would talk about wanting to have sex with girls, in the way that grade 8 boys normally do. We graduated, he went to a different high school than myself and most of my graduating class, and I didn't really think much of him.Today I found out through a friend of mine that still keeps up with him that he came out as gay very recently. And for some particular reason, I found this very shocking. Mostly because he was really the person I'd last expect it from. So I talked to my other friends from elementary and none of them were really all that shocked.All day I have not been able to take it off of my mind off of it. Believe me, I am not a homophobe (not particularly sure where I even sit on the spectrum). I just needed to write about this to get it off my chest. Never really dealt with situations like this before.
Just wondering what y'all think...
My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 7 months now. I have never been the type of person to keep much contact with people that I've hooked up with before. My boyfriend feels differently on the latter and has stayed in contact with some guys he's hooked up with in the past on Facebook and other forms of social media. In the beginning of our relationship, he went into detail on the sexual activities he would engage with guys before meeting me and now I am uneasy and uncomfortable when I think about my partner being with other people. How common is it for people who are in relationships to remain friends with people they've hooked up with in the past and to stay friends with them when they are in a relationship? I am curious as to how the community feel about this and to hear your opinions/experiences.
Muslims receive unfair sympathy vs other ethnic groups living in homophobia
Most of the earth still lives in homophobic conditions but western meda is obsessed with Muslims. Why is it that they deserve special attention when pretty much everywhere else is a shithole?
Is it ever going to be the same?
It has hardly been a month since the person who I was considering as "the man of my life" made it clear to me that we can't be together anymore, and I have no idea where I am standing at the moment. It has been some crazy weeks, trying to adjust to my new life, having a big space inside my heart; I can't feel anything anymore, I just don't want to think about him, I don't want to cry, and I am afraid this is not healthy at all, keeping every feeling inside and not letting my emotions surface.I am a 22 years old guy, living in a country that tends to generally not accept gay people easily. Despite all the obstacles we faced, the relationship lasted for five years. The best five years of my life.I always felt lucky for having him so early in my life. We were both 17 when we met. I was his first, he was my first. First in everything. We grew up together. We lived together. We fought to be together. We slept everynight in each other's arms. We made dreams about the future together. Yes, he was my lover. And yet, he was so much more than that.I know my wounds will heal as time passes by, I will completely accept it and move on...Move on to what? What's next? Will it ever be possible to replace him? Is it ever going to be the same with someone else? I know what most would say: it won't be the same,it will be better. Or that it never is the same, because it will be a different person, but it doesn't mean they will not make me happy...I was happy though... I had things planned, and now I have lost everything...
selling intimates
hey guys, I'm a 20 year old slim and toned college guy. I'm selling some "intimates" for some extra cash. contact me if you're interested or have any particular requests and we can sort out the details. I'm open to hearing any requests so don't be shy
How do I move this forward?
So basically I met a guy, we've been talking for two days, i'm pretty sure we are both interested in eachother, we've been talking on and off and I really like him but the talkings always very short. For example he will message me "hey" at points then we will start a conversation and he will give me short answers which can be hard to reply to which could point towards the fact that he's not interested but if I don't reply he will type something else within a few minutes, like "how was your day" so i'm not sure if he's just quiet. Should I just go ahead and ask him on a date?
Having trouble moving on from short relationship
So I feel incredibly juvenile having to write about this but here goes. At the end of last year I got into a short but very intense relationship with a guy that lasted about 2 months. Earlier in the year I'd come out of a 4 year relationship that ended amicably and with me still being friends with that ex, and whilst it made me sad when it ended, it ended with mutual respect and friendship.This other relationship didn't. We met and hit it off incredibly quickly. Although not very good looking he's big and very 'masc', also extremely funny and charming and on paper he was everything I wanted. Within a week we'd made things official and within 3 weeks we were telling each other we loved each other. He went as far as to say he'd never met anybody like me. I got completely consumed by the relationship and started feeling insecure fairly quickly as I was terrified of things inevitably going wrong. We met each other's friends, went for a weekend away together, bought each other expensive Christmas presents etc.Two months in we had a stupid drunken argument that escalated, and even though I thought we'd resolved it, he suddenly turned cold and started picking at me, making little comments about my looks, the fact I smoke, etc etc. So I ended things with him - but I didn't really want to. A week later we met up and it felt like we'd gone back to normal - we kissed, held hands etc - but that night he told me he wasn't 'madly in love' with me anymore and was incredibly cold. I went home, blocked him on everything and haven't spoken to him since, it's been a little over a month.I haven't dealt with it well at all. I think about little else and have driven my friends to distraction talking about it (I've realised it's now time to stop talking about him). I'm pretty sure he's probably moved on already as his track record is one of moving on quickly.I get that we probably weren't actually in love with each other, rather the idea of the relationship. I get that he's also a narcissist and not a good person. But I can't focus on the rational. I still want him to contact me.I think I'm also scared of being single. I worry a lot about the future. I'm only 27 but nearly all of my friends are straight, they're all settling down and I wonder how I'm going to end up. My confidence has been shattered, mainly from the feeling of somebody telling me I was amazing, and then later on telling me I'm not.How exactly do I move on, stop thinking about it and feel happy again? Every morning I wake up at 5am feeling anxious and he's the first thing on my mind.TL:DR short, intense relationship left me unable to move on and feel confident in myself
2016. január 25., hétfő
21 year old emotional breakdown
Finished a romance series that I've been reading for over 8 years, started in high school, about two young adult gay men falling in love in 2008, and all the stigma that comes with it.Suffered a massive emotional break down after finishing the last book just a hour ago. They found each other at 20, and had their happily ever after at 24, and here I am at 21 and never even kissed someone.I really just wanna talk or something.
My Atheistic toughts on homosexuality
I got aids, and i know why now because i become a atheist.Our Lord, Richard Dawkins created the aids virus to destroy homosexuality on earth. First Lord Dawkins asked Hitchens if he has the permission to use the virus against gay people and C. Hitchens agreed. A weel later i got infected by aids. May this be a friendly reminder to all the gay people on earth to use condoms. Hitchens is watching at us in the skies and Dawkins is still waiting to release the aids virus on people again. Have a good day.
College
In my second semester of college and I haven't made much friends so I'm asking if anyone would like to talk or anything?? Kik me @kingofdisaster. I appreciate any conversation :)
Looking for advice or help.
Hello everyone. I was looking for some advice or help. Currently me and my boyfriend rent a room together. The only thing is that we rushed it due to our living situations and being treated wrongly and even being hit. Before we moved in together we both had jobs so things seemed ok but then he lost his job and I lost my second job. So we have been struggling with money,food, and rent since my job hasn't been enough to pay for it all and he's still looking for a job. Rent is due really soon and if we can't pay then we're getting kicked out. So were stuck. If any one can offer any type of help and advice please do thank you very much.
Its happened again.
For the, er, 5th time, I have had people just stop talking to me. It is weird, because it seems like we get really close and then we exchange pictures, of our faces, and then they just stop talking to me. This last guy I spoke to him for over two weeks everyday and night, then we exchange face photos and he stops talking to me. I really didn't think I was that unattractive, but it just hurts a little more each time. Its a huge self confidence buster. Yes, I met these guys online, but where I am located for school it is hard to find other gay men near me, so I look online at home. Am I doing something wrong?
2016. január 24., vasárnap
Kind of need help right now...😁😁
Right people lets start I'm a rather happy,genuin and fairly decent asian gay. However I went out with me friend this weekend to a gay club. We did a sober night out cause we were too hungover from the night before (thinking it was going to be fun....oh boy was I wrong). Lets carry on, we went to a gay club it was fun at first then me being sober start to notice how amazing all of the guys in there look like wow....and then my confident level drop like seriously dropped. Through out my childhood I was the "ugly asian kid", lets look at a wonderful memory of mine. Kids would make fun of me and when they see me they would run screaming to highlight the fact that I was so UGLY (I know right assholes). As I have grown older my confident level rises. Some days I feel I could defeat the world and I make something of myself and have the dream of a happy family with lots of wondeful children (always wanted to adopt Lol).Sure I have never been in a relationship before ever but have been kissed, never had intercourse. The fact that I tried to date and get rejected constantly didn't stop me lol there must be someone. But that time going out looking around me with such perfection, and me and ugly, nerdy, hideous asian person. That is when all of my feeling that I had supressed for so long came rushing out. Now my life is a living mess I can see how hideous I'm the confident is no longer there I can't hide behind the play I put on (I'm always smilling it is the best mask, my loniless and pain is gone) my friends don't know the real me. I can't go on living behind a mask, hiding the pain smilling like everything is perfect. The thought of suicide came into existence again, just that one night out bring me back to reality. So basically what I'm asking is for help any advice as how to cope with this. My story doesn't seem that serious I know but I always tried to make the best of everything because what is the point of living if you are miserable. My tone isn't excatly of a suicidal monsteousity of a gay specimen but it is effecting my life and I'm confuse. Constantly crying and wanting to claw off my face (a dark thought for your entertainment) but at the same time I feel like I'm loosing hope of ever achieving my happiness. Am I really destine to be lonely and ultimately dying alone? Isn't life meant to be lived? Are gays so superficial that they would judge by appearance? (Never been given a chance to even say how are you they saw my photo then wam, it is an instant block). Sorry for the rant any advice will be appreciated love you all BBBBBBBYYYEEEEEE
I need advice on how to tell my parents about my boyfriend.
Warning: Giant wall of text.Hi, I'm a 16 year old male. I'm gay. My parents know I'm gay, and they know about a past boyfriend of mine, and they were really accepting, they have no problem with either of those things.My current problem is that I'm 16, and my current boyfriend is 18. Yes, we know about age of consent, we're not having sex. We've been together for about 5 months, and we both have incredibly strong feelings for each other. I'm 100% certain I want to tell my parents about him, that's not even a question. He's exactly the type of person my parents like, so it's not even a worry about if they'll like him.What's making this so difficult is that I have GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder), which makes many things that may be easy for someone else virtually impossible for me. For me, GAD makes it so I can't bring up topics like this to my parents, but if they ask me about it, I have no problem telling them. For example, they found out I'm gay, I had no problem telling them, they asked if I had a boyfriend during my last relationship, and I had no problem telling them.I'm looking for a way to either bait them into asking, or get a conversation to move in that direction (or have relationships be in context) that I could bring myself to tell them. Please don't tell me to just get over it, or power through it. With GAD, I actually can't. So, I'd really appreciate some help. Or if anyone has other ideas on how to tell them, that would be greatly appreciated.I'm just so tired of having to hide being with him. We've been on four actual 'dates' since we've been in a relationship, and every time, I've told my parents that I'm going somewhere with my friends. I hate lying to my parents. And I don't want to lose their trust. Thanks a lot to anyone who can help.
Advice pls
So this is my first post to Reddit ever. I'd like some advice on bringing that spark back to my bedroom in my relationship. We've been together for 3 years now. We do everything a normal relationship does, we have two houses together go on holidays together at least twice a year but we also give each other our space. Since leaving the army 1.5 years ago I've noticed our sex life has diminished. I'm smitten by my partner and couldn't imagine life without him. We are very open to each other we both know each others passwords to everything so there is never anything surprising. I just wonder if we've gotten too comfortable with each other and I just feel like we need to bring that spark back. Thank you!
Me and this guy I like...
So I recently accepted myself as being gay, and I have came out to a few friends and my mom and sister. All went well. I had decided to come out because there was this guy I like, who is also gay, I know he is because he came out. I have been trying to get with him since I came out to him, but to no avail. A few weeks ago i was being flirty with him, but after a few minutes he said that he "thought we should just be friends because I don't want to lose a friend like you" after that I just tried to get over him, but I can't seem to be able to, so I am still trying I guess. Today I invited him to go sledding and we went sledding, basically all day. It was really fun and we both had fun. He is always saying stuff like "I want a bf" and related. I feel like I am friend zone doomed. What should I do? I really want this guy.
I'm gay. But I don't feel gay.
Hey guys. New poster here. I wanted to put something out there that I've been thinking about for awhile. Maybe this will help me make some sense of my life, I don't know.Anyway I'm a 22 year old English Major in Michigan.I also have cerebral palsy so I use a wheelchair. I've been out since I was 18, and ever since I broke up with my first real boyfriend a couple of years ago, there's a small part of me that doesn't feel like I'm gay. I look at all the gay people in my world (the GSA and LGBT community at school various OkCupid and Grindr people) and I don't relate to them AT ALL! In my experience, people make being gay this all encompassing issue. Being gay is their whole life. And because I don't feel like going out to pride and waving a flag, I feel like gay folks don't have time for me.I don't know...I don't expect there to be any resolution coming from this. I just thought I would put it out there.I'm sorry if anyone finds this offensive, not my intention. :)
The meaning!
We are trying to get everybody's acceptance that we are no different from the straight people, right? Why are we throwing gay pride parades with almost naked males and females and swinging with all the confetti and stuff. Shouldn't we just walk there like normal people with our clothes on and show that we're the same kind as them? Someone correct if I'm wrong, but I don't know a single straight parade where people walk half-naked through a city. It's just my thoughts but yeah, you gotta do what you love :) I don't judge.
Letter to a poor homophobe (x-post to /r/LGBTeens)
Note: this isn't my text, it's just the translation of this article (http://ift.tt/1K5zxLE)While you assert your opinion strongly, what I hate the most about you is what you don't know.You don't know what a father who shakes his other children's hair (but not yours), only because you don't play with his football:You don't what the first true lie is, and the red cheeks when all your family members expect you to kiss that other girl but you don't want to, and the fight with anomalies starts in your head.Like when you'd like those toys that have a color that someone else decided to be for girls;You don't know what it's like dreaming in the classroom and not having the possibility to risk, writing notes to the others or trying (to get a date) during the school trip. You don't know what it's like seeing the others develop their chest and their muscles, kissing in front of the school, becoming young adults and creating groups of friends. With intertwined hands while sitting and laughing on the wall. While you live waiting for an error which never goes away. And you lose the years of experiments, the years in which you have the license to be foolish which will expire with your diploma (in Italy it's the end of high school, diploma di Maturità). And together with the first loves which you had to stop and strangle, you end your adolescence. You say goodbye without having even tasted it;You don't know what it's like going out when all the others are in bed, the keys picked up in silence and escaping in the car where all the street lamps are off. In the nights when it rains, the best ones because nobody can look beyond the wetness, and in the danger of an isolated street. Where someone you don't know yet might walk. You don't know how it's like waiting in terror for the first lights in the distance, and hoping it's not a policeman or a criminal who'll steal your wallet, but someone hiding in the bushes like you. Someone to whom you can steal a kiss to bring home. Meager, begged for, unenthusiastic, just so that you can believe that you're interesting to someone;You don't know what it's like when your mother asks you to keep a low profile, or when your father would like you to be more manly. You don't know what it's like to never feel like you're enough, and then even one too many in the house you were born in. Feeling your parents hoping for you to go away, bringing wiht you their and your shame. You don't know what it's like being tormented by where you'd go to live if they kicked you out, putting mere survival in front of your family. You don't what it's like to have to leave your homeland just to be yourself. Beginning to check the list of the things you said you would eventually do, which you'll slowly do at the wrong times. Like the first dates at 25, when the others are already getting married and calling you immature;You don't know what it's like to have a label on you, stuck on by those who believe they're different and better from you because of their religion. You don't know what it's like waking up every day and feeling like a study subjects, discussed like a disease, a trend, a damage to the country's funds and a disaster for children. You don't know what it's like having to endure the tips on a child's education by someone who's asexual in the name of God (a.k.a. by a priest), and being between people who give more credit to the corruption under that tunic than not to the love you have to give;You don't know what it's like not having the means to like someone like everyone does. You don't know what it's like to be in a cafe, smiling to someone on the other side and not having the possibility to give them your number, because you don't know if they'd call you back or slap you. You don't know what it's like having to give up the spontaneity of chance or genuine impulses but having to restrict your desires to a theme local or a chat in which no one reveals their name for fear;You don't know the anxiety of holding hands, or going back home alone and on foot, because you could find yourself surrounded by people with bats in their hands. Finding yourself with a sore face against the ground and no one to ask for help to, no one helping you, no one who dares turning because of discomfort. You don't know what the wounds and bruises for which no one will pay are, because homophobia isn't a crime, according to law. And you go on in life with the doubt and tears ready, accepting that certain crimes only have victims and no criminals;You don't know what it's like to not have the freedom to be with someone, and never becoming adults for real.Not being able to chase the instics of human tradition, but listening to politics and groups who say you'll never have the right to be happy with someone else. Drop after drop, that your emotions are only the product of a distortion.Then, when you watch what you have left, tired, being called a pervert.Because this world only gave you the right to have sex, but did it only to remind you that it's the only thing you're interested in. And after having convinced entire generations that for you and those like you there's nothing else, and no form of emotion, you start convincing yourself that what you have is enough. Already stained by all the lies, the hate and the melancholy. And you have sex because that's what's been established for you. You have sex because that's the only thing your heart is used to. You have sex in a dark room full of bodies, so that no one can see you and judge you again. You have sex to finally feel that thing. Sharing. Tormented, longed for sharing of yourself;You don't know what it's like being more than thirty and not having any legal right, already possession of everyone at birth but not you. Even though you tried showing the world more than what you had to. From when you started begging your father for that small praise, the forgiveness of your mother for the grandchildren she'll never have. The respect of colleagues at work, a salary with which you don't have to worry about taxes or the profile of a decent citizen.And you don't know what it's like being called "the gays" on TV. Not even in singular, not a name nor a surname. Only "the gays", without the rights for which you already pay for the others.You don't know what it's like to get old in the echo of an empty house. Because after an existence spent listening to lies or reasons for which you are inadequate to have a family you've lost the strength and audacity to believe in yourself. To bond, to choose another person with whom you can start the adventure of your last piece of life. Because anyways it's not marriage, there aren't any children, and if your loved one ends up in the hospital you can't even go see him. And in the end you don't exist for anyone, slowly you don't exist even for yourself and abandon yourself to loneliness;You don't know many things. You almost don't know anything. But every day you grasp on the privilege to express your opinion and break my heart. We didn't ever even see each other, yet you devastate my life. Unconcerned, like your species, and mine too, is. Unconcerned. And if we stopped being that, towards those who live around us, nothing would be left except for peace.Pierpaolo Mandetta, Letter to a poor homophobe
Question to out bisexual and gay men
As an out bi/gay man, how do you feel about dating/long-term relationship with a closeted bisexual or gay man? (and I don't mean hookups) - Would you not want to be in such a relationship? or you would hope that your partner would come out with time? or simply you don't care? What are your experiences?
[NSFW] Favourite positions?
Looking to spice things up in the bedroom for my bf and I, so curious to hear what your favourite positions are :) If you can link to any videos to illustrate that would be awesome as well :)
I'm 16, and old men like to hit on me. The only problem is that I don't have any confidence.
I'm new to Reddit, and I'm a 16-year-old high school graduate. I currently go to college, and I'm always around older people. I have a job at a café and that's where this tends to happen. I'm a virgin who hasn't had their first kiss, so dating old men is out of the picture... I think. At work, there are a few older men that stop by that have a thing for me. They've asked me to go out with them oblivious of my age. I never give them a proper answer. I just get really choked up when they do, and say, "I don't know." Sometimes I just make it clear to them that I'm busy, and can't talk. Having little to no confidence doesn't make this any easier. My coworkers find this hilarious because I'm a "straight guy" getting hit on by older gay men; they don't know that I'm gay. Anyway, I'm not complaining about the older guys. It's fine with me, but I'm disappointed that I'm so unconfident. If you have any advice, I'll listen, though I'm just ranting mostly.
how to I move on from the guy I love?
I need some advice about moving on and getting over someone whose broken my heart. laying awake at night, thinking about everything to the point I'm sick isn't fucking helping.
2016. január 23., szombat
Age gap?
Hey guys so I have a very limited dating pool where I'm from. I'm 19 almost 20 and have been talking to someone who is 14 turning 15 in November. I would obviously take this very slow but I was wondrous your opinions on the subject I'm still 50/50 on weather or not it's a good idea. It may help that out family's are friends of eachother.
TIFU
I looked at my exes facebook page. Its been like three weeks or so since we broke up. We only dated a few months and it was never a good relationship if im being honest but seeing recent pictures of him make me miss him so much more. Every time I think im over him and have moved passed it, some place we used to go or a thought I have brings it all back and it feels as though it just happened. He was a big reason I came out to my family and yet he still ghosted me which hurts so much more. I know a person that ghosts somebody isnt worth feeling bad about but it doesnt stop me from feeling like shit anyway. Sorry for the rant some days are harder than others.
Why whenever a guy or a girl comes out on facebook do all the girls like it and not that many boys?
Is it because boys tend to be more homophobic?
I got in a relationship with a guy.......I'm confused
Alright, I'd like to start off by saying that English isn't my first language, I know it's not bad but don't mind the few mistakes if there is any. I'm a 19 years old guy with a full-time job, I'd rather not say too much about me sorry.I'm kinda new to this whole "not-straight" thing. 2015 has been a mess for me. In January last year, I started questioning myself about "What if i'm not Straight?", usually i'd be able to just find a reason to stop thinking about it but this time I wasn't able to and really started questioning myself about me being something else than straight, not necessarily gay, just not straight.I've had a girlfriend back in April, but it wasn't successful, it lasted for a month and we haven't kissed nor actually hugs or whatever, we didn't really had feeling for each others but we've ended up as really good friends and we're both comfortable with that. From the moment we broke up, I really started questioning myself if I liked guys more than girls, I got extremely confused until very recently.I'm a "wanna-be competitive" player of a certain game and I've started attending local tournaments and friendlies matches where I live back in September, I've met that one guy who is gay and out of the closet, he's very good at the game and i've started to talk to him a bit, he drove me back home and I really enjoyed his company as a friend, nothing else back then. I've talked to him on Facebook a few times, played said-game with him and pretty much start giving advices to each other (I'm good on the technical part of the game, he's good on the "mind-reading" part of it). I started enjoying hanging out with him, then in December I kinda wanted to go further (Not necessarily having a crush on him, but I was interested about a relationship, I'm someone looking for something serious and I don't like playing around).For New Year, we went to someone's place to celebrate and I went there with him, I remember looking at him when he got in my car and wanting to kiss him, I can be quite impulsive so I thought it was that so I calmed down. The one hosting us had a tantrum (He's almost 18) and he kept hiding with his girlfriend, it was awful and no one had fun, his brother kept apologizing and hanged out with us instead and kept saying he was sorry. At the end of the evening, I invited him and another friend at my place to compensate the shitty evening we just had. While driving back at my place, I took all my courage and asked the guy how he found out he was gay, we started talking about it and kinda gave him hints I'm not straight (Again, not necessarily gay, just not straight). He understood my hints and came out to him, he then told me "I'd be willing to be in a relationship with you if you feel like it". I panicked, I told him I'll think about it just to be sure I know what I was going into.Back at my place, my friend got drunk really fast (He's not an alcohol guy) and started saying a bunch of random stuff, me and the guy pretty much ended on the same couch and he started taking my hand and touching my sides under a blanket (My friend still doesn't know that happened). In the end, my friend fell asleep and I put him to bed, so me and the guy pretty much ended up alone together, we cuddled and watched youtube videos together and chilled, no kiss nor anything, just cuddles. I really liked it, I was the one on him and I really liked being on the receiving side (I'm selfish, yup).We started going out together, and it slowly became official. Right now it's official with him and a few of our friends know about it. But I feel awkward about something, at some points he told me he had a crush on me since he met me and kept thinking I was cute, it kinda hit me really hard when he said that, I'm not used to people telling me that kind of thing, I honestly think I don't look that good, people used to tell me I was ugly back in middle-school. Since then, we've cuddled a couple times and kinda "TouchedEachOtherAtSpecificMasculinePlaces", as I said earlier, I tend to be impulsive.I'm really not sure about myself in general, am I doing the right thing? Do I really like him? Is it really what i'm looking for? Am I really "not-straight"? There is a million questions in my head, we slept together already and a part of me is telling me this is going too fast, but another part is fine with it and like it. I'm extremely confused I don't even know anymore why i'm typing this on Reddit anymore, I've browsed different stories here hoping to find an answer without success.......Sorry if this is not clear enough but it's not clear in my head at all......
Is something wrong with me?
I'm desperate for some advice. So, there's a bit to explain here so just bear with me.So, for starters I recently moved to Chicago & I've been here for about three weeks now. I was lucky enough to meet the most amazing guy in the city a few days afterI'm relatively new to accepting my sexuality & have only really started to explore it within the last year or so. As far as dating goes, I've never dated a guy before so this is my first time catching authentic feelings for a guy that I'm interested in being exclusive with. Put short, I wanna' stick with this guy and I hope he wants to stick with me.So here's my problem: whenever we've fooled around, I can't cum. I'm insanely sexually attracted to him & I have no issue getting/staying hard but it's really embarrassing that I can't actually finish. At first I chalked it up to whiskey dick, but this morning I sober & still couldn't cum.I really like this guy - he's honestly the most amazing person I've ever caught feelings for. Sex is important & I don't know why all of a sudden I'm having a hard time with it (never have before.)Maybe it's because I'm new here? Maybe it's because I like him & it's all in my head? I'm not sure. But any advice would be awesome.tl;dr: I like this guy. He's amazing in every way. Very sexually attracted to him. Can't cum. Don't know why.
Wish there was another word besides homophobia
The generally accepted definition for homophobia (off the top of my head) is someone who's bigoted against gay people in some way and genuinely has a problem with them. However in my life I have male friends who are totally disinterested in physical contact between males, even if both are straight. I'm talking anything more than a handshake: hugs, pats on backs, holding hands. I often find myself calling these people homophobes without really thinking about it. I thought about it and what I really mean is that they in some way have a phobia of male-to-male or "homoerotic" (loosely) behavior. You could claim this is because they really are bigoted but for many of my straight friends I doubt it. So I wish we had a word or could make up a word that described this kind of behavior so I had something else to say that wouldn't offend straights.LOL rant over
2016. január 22., péntek
finding love
finding love In small town in mississippi is literally hell. thank you I just needed to complain..
How do you guys tell if a guy is just being nice or if he's flirting with you?
Basically title since my situation is a little stranger than most. I also convince myself that he's just bring nice.Context:I'm 20, never been in a relationship and a leukemia patient (though, basically in remission, meaning there aren't any cancerous cells left), and I'm pretty friendly with all the nurses, easy-going and reletively independent when I'm admitted. They all talk to me and I'm pretty open with how I'm feeling and what I'm up to. General questions I usually get are:*How are you feeling?*How's your day?*I heard you weren't here for x period of time, how was that?*So what were you doing before you got diagnosed?Among the staff and occasional nursing students from the local joint university/college program, there are a handful of guys. One of the nurses had me and when he was hooking my IV up he asked me about one of my interests. He only asked me if I was interested in anime, but it strikes me as odd because none of the other nurses ask me about anything other than things they need to know about for the purpose of their jobs.He also came to look for me once just to tell me what chemo I had coming up, but he also has a nursing partner and he's more experienced of the two ( I often hear her asking him for clarification or getting him to come and help her before she does some tasks), so he easily could of asked her to look for me instead of coming himself.When I'm not on his service, but another patient in my room is, he usually drops by and says hi with a quick how are you, but this one I think he's just being nice. I dunno, maybe I'm just reading into it too much. Also doesn't help that I've been really wanting a relationship recently.Though aside from my situation, how do you guys tell that a guy is flirting with you in other social contexts?PS. Doing this from mobile, so here's to hoping the first draft formats well!
Help with chat random
If someone got naked on omegle or chat random, could someone record it and put it on the internet? Worried because I did this, but I am of legal age and the person didn't know my name. Hope I don't have a problem!
Is anyone else here Catholic?
I know some of you hate the Church for the whole "no marriage thing" but I care more about what it teaches than that. Anyone else here a Proud Gay Catholic?
The Birdcage, Dick Cheney, and the Lesbian Dominatrix
So this is a link to one of my blog posts, and at the end it's kind of a little ad for what I do for fun, but I honestly typed these thoughts this morning and it started out as just reminiscing about the past, and the evolution of my ideas as I have slowly un-indoctrinated myself from right wing Americanized Christianity. I hope you will forgive the brief plug at the end, and enjoy my personal tale of The Birdcage, Dick Cheney, and the Lesbian Dominatrix.Thanks! Also I'm not gay so I don't really post here, but I didn't know where (or if) on Reddit to post this. If you hate it, feel free to slam your finger down upon your mouse, with the cursor poised in prim malevolence above the downvote button. I promise I won't care or probably even notice since I don't have reddit installed on my phone and, as an author, I'm frankly used to being told to go die in a fire. I've developed an impenetrable electrofucknetic shield which prevents me from giving fucks. Adieu.
The adventures of Kevin
When Kevin arrives to Gay Paris for the first time, he discovers a new world, full of excitement and joy. Though Paris hides more secrets than he can imagine
2016. január 21., csütörtök
(Advice Needed)(Straight Male) How do I confront my roommate?
First time posting on reddit! I'm a straight guy and I have been friends with my roommate ever since high school. This one night I had to wake up at 2AM to do homework and I walk into something a little unexpected. I caught him masturbating to gay porn in the study room at 2 AM. He had his headphones on and he did not catch me walking in on him. His friend group in high school always joked around with my roommate being gay quite a bit. I want to be a good friend and try to confront him about this incident. I want to let him know that it is okay to come out and be gay. Is there any way I could help him come out?
Someone to talk to
I'm looking for some new friends to talk to whether it's sexy or just casual it doesn't matter to me I'm from Minnesota and 25. Could use some advice and just want to talk so pm me and we will go from there thanks everyone.
Ok...this is where it gets confusing?
Ok so lets get things straight i am straight but a few years ago my mum had this gay friend and i always got a vibe of him. The thing is i felt like a kinda fancied him and when i found out he was looking after the house while the rest of my family went on holiday i started to have sexual dreams about this man. I never let anything come to it as i spent most of time out of the house.But today after a good year an a half of not speaking to me or my family he invited me round his house tomorrow for dinner (other reason lead to this) but since the invite all i can think of is how much i want him in me :\So heres were i need help: 1.how to tell if hes coming on to me 2.how to make it subtly obvious that i want him 3.how would i slip it into convo 4. Should i let him fuck me if theres a chanceI will post a post tomorrow to let you all know
Is my friend gay?
First time posting here so apologies in advance :p. (I myself am bi btw) LSS: We are both 16 and have known each other for about 4 years. About a year or so ago, I realised I was really attracted to him and ever since he has been the only person I'm attracted to. I don't know for sure if he's gay/bi but I think he is, I'll do my best to give as much info as possible, here goes...Starting a few days ago, I rubbed his thigh in class as a joke, we both laughed a bit but ever since that he has been talking to me a lot more than usual and touching me a lot more than usual. For example, in class when we sit next to each other, our arms or legs will touch and neither of us pull them away, this doesn't happen with any other of my friends and neither with him. He gives me nicknames too, I already have one that everyone knows me by, but he has a different one that only he calls me and has done so for about a year. Another thing that happened a while back is my most solid evidence for him being gay/bi, I was sat in class and there were no seats left where all of our friends were sitting so when my friend came in, I jokingly said he could sit on my lap, which he did. That probably gave me the biggest hard on of my life and it would be very, very noticeable to someone sat on my lap. He adjusted himself occasionally but never said a thing. He also touches my arms or hands when their on the desks for no reason and I reciprocate, we also share glances at each other from across hallways and rooms. He's never talked about girlfriends or any relationships before, but was very interested in mine when I had one not too long ago. I am really deep in the closet if that matters. I want to try and advance things with him, so I might try and touch him a little more and see his response. The school we go to is a little homophobic, so coming out is not really a common thing.So what do you guys think? Thanks in advance!
Anyone else dislike it when guys sag their pants?
Like geez, how else am I supposed to check out your butt if your pants hang so low .-.
2016. január 20., szerda
What's your sexual fantasy?
I saw a post similar to this so I thought id make this one.Okay here's mine. I'm 16 and I'm attracted to older guys so this involves and older like 18-28 idk... So we would have to be talking for a while I guess maybe some pics here and there but it all came down to getting it on lol. We would have a date and back to his place a very romantic setting and just go to town on his bed. Lmao goals But yeah something along those lines. Pretty basic. Please share :)
I'd yank Joey Graves shorts off too, liquid putty
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_KAUcRBlWs&feature=youtu.be&t=4s
Whats the best way to aproach him
M/23 Hi guys, so ive basically i decided to get tinder, you know just so i know whats out there as there are barely any homo bros where i am. so i get talking to this guy online who works near where i study, and to my surprise we are actually getting along really really well. same interests, dislikes an yeh there are stuff we disagree on but it really does make good convo. he likes to say were are philosophical. he's the cutest person and will message me all the time and always calls to make sure i go home after i tell him ive been out partying.he knows that i like him cos i super liked him on tinder and ive been out with guys before, but im genuinely really nervous because ive never got on with someone so so well. literally dont know how to ask him out and i feel like a kid again, who's too nervous to do anything. feeling all kinds of emotions and laugh to myself when i think about him, and i dont wanna say i love him because its really cliche, but i got some really strong feelings for this guy. what should i do ??
Here goes nothing
HI I'm an 18 year old gay guy who lives in the NOVA region I want to meet other gay guys around my age to hang out with where are good places to go
Is anyone here apart of the LGBTQ club at Utah Valley University?
I just joined the schools club but I don't know anyone else that's in it. I was just wondering if anyone here was apart of that club
Has anyone been to PTown on Memorial day ?
Probably not the best place to ask, I know. But if theres any demographic thats almost sure to visit PTown, it's the gays. I want to know what to expect if I got there this year with a group of friends. Is it busy ? packed ? rowdy ? Any info is greatly appreciated
2016. január 19., kedd
Any Gay MMA Fans?
I really enjoy mma as a sport, and while I know it's not for everyone, I just don't know many gay men who do... Just curious if anyone out there does?
How do I have my first romantic experience?
I'm a gay senior in a small school in New York. I'm just not sure how to find people. I want to at least have some kind of relationship or experience before I go off to college. I'm just not sure what is an appropriate way to find someone.
Nightmares
I come from a part of the world which views being gay as the product of demonic possession and western influence. I moved to the US five years back, and gradually overcame my fears and misconceptions and eventually accepted that I liked guys just a little over a year and a half ago. Nearly everyone I came out to was happy for me, and riding this wave, I decided to come out to my mother, who lives a continent away. Needless to say she took it badly - I got frustrated and suicidal during our conversation, and it was the first and last we had to say on it. She hasn't brought it up because she hopes it's all just a bad dream, and I haven't because I don't want to upset her. My siblings had a similar reaction so it's not something I ever talk about with them.I'll preface this by saying I love my mum and siblings very dearly. My mum sacrificed a lot to get me where I am now, and I'll forever be grateful. However, for a year, I started noticing that I was resenting my mother and my siblings, I'm already a reserved person who doesn't say a lot, and I think it's worsened. I avoid their messages and only give lukewarm replies when they call. I recognize what's going on, but I feel powerless to stop it, and it's only growing worse and worse. For the past few months I've been having the same nightmare every couple of days or so - in the dream my entire family hates me for no apparent reason, and chases me out of my home. In more recent dreams, they actually try to hurt me or kill me. I do recognize that it's a dream, but it's stressing me out like hell and I wake up tearing up all the time, and it's bleeding into my real life relationship with them.I don't know what to do. Should I try talking to them again? Should I see a therapist and get counselling. I'd appreciate any advice from anyone who can commiserate. Thanks in advance.
Does anyone know where I can get information on Gay Sports leagues?
I live in SLC, UT and I would like to find a Rugby, Soccer, hockey, or even football gay league in utah. Any sugestion or link to pages?
I'm pretty masculine, but apparently I don't look that way in pictures? What can I do about that, at least appearance-wise?
I'm assuming that my look is what might be scaring people off. But, it's not like I can pull off the "boy next door" or "jock" look.Here I am, I guess: http://ift.tt/1JX2s4m
Anyone used to have crushes on girls?
My memory isn't the best but I remember wanting to touch a boys penis when I was like 6 years old. I had a crush on this one girl from like 3rd grade til 8th.In 8th grade I had a crush on this other girl. I was at a sleepover with a male friend and we both went to one of those websites that supposedly tells you how compatible you and your crush are (by just typing in your names), but that same night I remember kind of hoping something would happen between me and my friend. So I've had 2 girl crushes buy no crushes on guys. Except for being attracted to my teacher in 9th grade and masturbating thinking about him.I don't think I'd call myself bi. I don't know. I can think a girl is pretty or whatever but not really be attracted to her. Although I do generally think girls with long straight hair are prettier. If I watch straight porn I don't like it when the women moan like crazy or much at all really but when men do it in gay porn i don't rewlly mind. But like it when, in straight porn, the men fondle the women's breas.t.
That time when Japan decided to edit mashups of Queen and gay porn
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4LqRRI2jKo
2016. január 18., hétfő
Looking for Some Advice
Hey guys. I'm a 17 year old senior in high school and I've really been struggling the past couple months with my sexuality. I could really use some advice/guidance/kind words. I am Roman Catholic and have been all my life so it's been quite difficult for me to bring to terms what I've been taught all my life with all these feelings and emotions. In fact, I was pretty homophobic until I got to high school and sometimes I even have this internalised hatred of myself and my feelings. My parents while not explicitly homophobic would be rather upset and disappointed if I tried to talk to them about this. I started to question myself in seventh grade but I would always find a way to suppress it. More recently, I have found it harder to do so. A couple of months ago my best friend and I came out to each other and we started flirting really quickly. A couple of weeks later when my parents and my girlfriend (now ex-girlfriend; we broke up for completely unrelated reasons) were out of town, I hooked up with him on three separate occasions that week end. I just feel so much guilt and sadness over all of this. I told him that I didn't want to see him anymore and while our friendship was kind of rocky the next couple of weeks, we made up and are friends again, but I still feel badly over the terms in which I told him I didn't want to see him. I told my sister some of what happened and while she was very nice about it she couldn't really empathise or offer any advice. If anyone has any advice on dealing with being religious and maybe being gay, I would really appreciate it.
What do 3 cis women, 1 man and 1 trans woman have in common?
Drama Does the drama ever end? everyone I have dated so far has created a humongous amount of drama.
Does the shallowness ever end?
I'm having trouble fitting into the gay community. I am a college student from WV and the gay community here is awful. Nobody will talk to me or even hang out with me and it is really starting to take its toll on me. I try to go to the gym to make myself feel better and look more appealing, but nothing works. People who meet me in class seem to like me and think I'm funny, but the gay guys here just snub their noses at me. I try to just focus on my education(I work in a research lab here and also have undergrad TA'd for some classes) and I work part time... It just hurts my feelings sometimes though because I feel so lonely. I see some of the few people I kind of know getting in relationships and really enjoying themselves, and I just feel like I'm missing out. I even ask them if they know of anyone that they can maybe introduce me to and they just tell me no each time I ask. Is this a common thing in the gay community, or should I really just hope for the best if I get to move away for graduate school?Edit: Forgot to mention that even if someone does finally respond to me on something like Grindr or twitter, they never seem interested in meeting up or anything. There's always someone that's apparently better looking to them and they just kind of treat me like something they can use whenever they get bored and just respond to my messages occasionally
Need help getting a friend out of Gay Therapy!
Howdy all! I don't know how these things are still fucking legal but a friend of a friend got shipped off to a therapy to "get cured" (rolls eyes) somewhere in Oklahoma.We want to know if there is a way to get him out. We don't have any way to contact him. The parents are the ones that sent him and he left for the camp on Friday morning.Back story on him, he's 22 from Nebraska. His parents started cutting off his access to his car, job, and school as he is currently financially dependent on them. His parents gave an ultimatum to go to this therapy or to continue getting cut off.What if anything can we do about this? Would we be able to even file a missing person's report?Thanks in advance!
Who is this man?
Hello all. I'm curious about if someone could help me to know who is the man at this Lumia ad pic. I'm thinking, since I saw for first time the ad, that this (handsome) man sounds like I have seen him before in other place, maybe in another ad, in a film, or something, I don't know. Maybe I have never seen him and I'm in a mistake, but I would like to know who is to resolve my doubt. Thank you all of you.http://ift.tt/1PCrcvl sorry for waste some of your time with my "ridiculous" doubt.
My First Gay Experience...
I thought it would be good to share my first homo-sexual experience because I was told it would be I guess… alright. To start off I would like to say I am a male, and that I have never been attracted to a male until I first saw a boy at a tournament (I was actually mainly interested in girls and till this day still find them generally more attracted). I met this boy when I reached the age of 15. He looked young had braces, and the only word I told my friend to describe my first impression of him was, “cute”. I just ignored these feelings because I thought this was the type of cute that you say when you see an adorable baby, but it was not. Originally I thought he was most likely 12 years old or somewhere in that vicinity however, he was actually 14. Now, when I found this out it about seven months later through a fan message from him because I do particularly well at the gaming tournaments I participate in. Interested in whom it was I messaged back and he replied with his name, for the purpose of confidentiality I will say it was Jane. Jane and I then added each other on skype because he lives a state over (2 ½ hours). When we talk we do not use video or anything, but this does not make me any less attracted to his voice. We grow closer and after a five hour conversation on philosophy I propose we use video, (I am really starting to like him at this point.) Jane and I grow even closer through our conversations and I come up with a pretty hip nickname at the time, “bae” something that objectively is stupid looking back at it. We start to grow even more of a connection. He proposes we kiss the screen to end our conversations. To be honest writing that sentence just made me a little emotional. I was thrilled. I took it a step further and we started saying I love you every night. Fast forward about two weeks. His parents drop him off at my house so we can participate in a tournament the next day in Chicago. That Friday night we hold hands, are extremely close, he sits in my lap, yet I do not kiss him or do anything real. We still sleep in separate beds. He comes over again. We do all of the things I just mentioned except this time I’m kissing his cheeks, wrapping my legs around him, and we sleep beside each other. He said messages me the next day saying, “all that stuff we did made me feel awkward.” I dismiss it and act like nothing really happened. I think this is an appropriate time to skip to when it downhill, a month later. At this point I am about 16 he is still 14. I confess my love and ask the big question, why are we not just dating? He says he does not want to answer that. I ask “why?” He says because, “It will make us sad.” At this point I am angry. He then offers to type it. He types an essay, sends the message, and ends the call. I tried to just look through our messages, but realized that is not in my best interest. To my memory the extent of the message was you make me feel awkward, I am not attracted to you, and I do not feel the same way. There is one word to describe how I felt… heartbroken. I message him constantly, but at this point I should inform you that he has an overwhelmingly amount of self-control when it comes to just not going on his computer. He does not even view a message until two weeks later. He messages me how he feels like a douche and really misses me. I tell him that things are going to have to change and he can never treat me like that again. I also tell him that I need those kinds of things from him. He says it is fine to an extent, but this does not mean we are in any sort of relationship. I forgot to mention he would do this cute thing for me every night before we stopped talking, “1 thing 2 say 3 words 4 you, I love you!” When I asked him to do it again I was denied. He said it was the reason I always treated him like a little kid. We start to fight more often. Everytime he comes over it is basically us cuddling, playing games, cuddling some more, and then him saying how uncomfortable he feels. I would always just respond with, “I need it.” I loved the way he made me feel. Every single best moment of my life was one with him. Sometimes when are fights got really bad I would threaten to leave. He rebuttled with, “One day I might feel the same way about you.” Sometimes I thought of suicide. At a point I threatened suicide. This circle continues until the last time we see each other. Our “year anniversary.” I got him a lot of gifts. We had a good amount of fun. I should also mention that I am starting to take the megabus to his house and his parents let us have the whole basement to ourselves. We did our usual cuddle and fight cycle. I get back. For a week he constantly just keeps fighting me. It makes me feel awful. He then just stops talking to me all together. I am ignored for two months straight with no response. We text again and he takes so much bottled up hatred out on me. I take it all with pleasure responding to everything as nicely as possible. He says he needs space. I get mad at this because it has been two months. He says he does not care. We have not talked since.I just turned 17 a week ago. We did not talk on christmas or my birthday, but it is ok. One thing I realize is I am an abuser and I made countless mistakes. There are a ton of holes in the story I just told you, but for the most part that is what happened. I also started seeing psychiatry and confronted jane as his abuser, so that he could hopefully live his life happy. The reason I post this is because I think people should recognize that it is a true waste of time trying to go after someone who does not have the same sexual preference as you. I also think no one should be forced into a relationship. Looking back at the happiest moments of my life, and realizing they are practically fake puts me in tears. If you have any questions about this or want to call me a shitty person feel free, hope I could entertain or provide some insight to your life.
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