feel kinda isolated

so, im attracted to females. im not very attracted to males. just as a general rule. but i am a bottom, who cant stand vaginas. they just aint right. im repulsed by them. on the other hand, i love dick @.@ big ones, medium ones..... big ones... im very attracted to mtf trans individuals, and androgynous males.the reason i have explained that... is because when im with my gay friends, i feel like i dont quite fit in. i find muscles and masculinity basically unattractive. now, there are exceptions, but just as a general rule.you also may have noticed i said i was a bottom.i feel like a mixed up and unfortunate mutant.. and im curious is there anybody out there who is similar.also... this may be sexist, but its just my preferences.. i dont like the average female personality. guys are just better.