2015. augusztus 31., hétfő
good gay bars/clubs in los angeles?
what are some good gay spaces in los angeles? i've been to the gold coast bar in west hollywood and flux in lakewood. anyone know of any other good spots???
[M18] Planning on having sex with a guy for the first time next week. Need help.
How do i prepare? How do I pleasure him as much as i can? Etc..
Meeting People
Hello,I'm somewhat stuck in the fairly common dilemma of most closeted, 16yo boys here of having trouble meeting gay friends. Hopefully being able to drive alone will alleviate some of that, but even so, there isn't a exactly a congregation I could go to on weekends. I've met plenty of people online from places far away, but that has its limitations.With that being said, how do you all meet other gay guys? Does it just become easy when I have a car? Do I wait until college? Must I come out?
I despise most porn.....kind of a rant inside [NSFW]
How come porn always has to have these gigantic fucking penises and the ugliest fucking guys attached to them? I guess i haven't stumbled upon the REALISTIC side of pornography where guys are average sized and not hung like a horse. It's kind of a turn off to see all these giant dicks because its seriously unrealistic. How do you expect a giant penis thats shaped like a bat to go inside your ass? Am i the only one that prefers average to the insanely unrealistic proportions that most porn says men should have? I'm a realist and that 8 inch fuckstick ISNT going inside me. I wouldnt even dream of it. /rant over.
Gay friends in their early 20s to chat with
Hey, so I'm here looking for some gay friends in the early 20s to chat with about life. Not that I don't respect or care about the opinions of others, I'm just looking for some people in my situation to talk to. Like: regrets of not being sexually active in college, still being semi-closeted, being gay at work. etc etc. Just general gay friends. Other subreddits don't seem to help much.
Ex boyfriend wants to be friends. What should I do?
I was in a 10 year relationship with a guy, and one day he told me that he wanted to break up. We had a home together and all our mutual friends. Within a flash, our relationship was over and my life was turned upside down.We were both early 30's at this point. I got left with the home and all the bills, while he took off and started a new life. We barely spoke, and did not hang out socially. Shortly after he broke up with the student, and started seeing someone else and they've been married for 5 years.Cut to now. He's been calling me nonstop wanting to talk. I finally talk with him today after blowing him off for several weeks. Now, I find out he's unhappy and wants to break off his new relationship. he wants us to hang out and be friends. I dont want to be here for him. I don't want him anywhere near, but when we chatted, I did miss him. I don't know what I should do. I will not get back together with him, since I'm in a relationship now. I don't want him to interfere, but I don't want to turn away a person who was part of my life for 10 years. What should I do?
Aggressively sexual men are really putting me off volunteer work. What should I do?
I'm a 22-year-old gay male living in Texas. About two months ago I started volunteering at a local HIV/AIDS resource center and I've really enjoyed it. It's a fun atmosphere and the job is really easy. There's only one guy at the place that puts me off with inappropriate remarks, but I think he's taken the hint that I'm not interested and hasn't said much to me in about a month now.Volunteering here made me want to do some more volunteer work in the community. I've done 3 events so far and every time older gay men (that were also volunteering) have made very inappropriate advances on me.At event #1 a guy invited me over to his house to go skinny dipping with him and his husband. I had literally spoken about 5 words to this guy throughout the night before he came up and bluntly said he and his husband are voyeurs and they just wanted to watch me swim around and give me free alcohol. I was pretty speechless.Event #2 wasn't bad. A fellow volunteer asked me to go home with him twice but that was it. Nothing crude and he took the hint. I just didn't go to this event to find someone to hookup with.Event #3, which was Saturday, another volunteer had been making a lot of inappropriate comments throughout the day and it all culminated with him coming up behind me and embracing me. This one really pissed me off. I shoved him back and said "What the fuck are you doing?" Then everyone looked at me like I was the crazy one. He said something along the lines of "I was just messing with you." and someone else said "You really need to calm down." I left.I don't know what to do here. I like volunteering and I want to help the community, but not like this. For now I think I'm going to stop doing anything other than my weekly stuff at the resource center. I just want to figure out how I can volunteer without being forced upon like this. Has anyone else experienced something like this?Also, before anyone says "report it," two of these three events were one-day things sponsored privately and the people to report were friends of the person to report to. I'm really at a loss here.
I just need to cry this out somewhere and think this sub is the right one.
I don't know 100% if that belongs here but it's something I'd like to talk about but can't talk about because I have a crush on my best friend .... so I can't talk to him obviously. I'm fond of him since I met him 1st in spring 2012 and in August we were in holiday together (in Italy to be precise) ... there were a few more people all in all we were 15 and there he got to know a girl which is his girlfriend now ... and that's making me sad :(
Just came out to the parents... I don't know what to do after their extremely awkward and hurtful response
I have always thought that I was kind of interested in guys, but I never really knew how to deal with it... Until now. I just turned 25, and started telling my close friends that I am gay a couple of months ago. I wanted to tell my parents at some time during my time visiting them this summer and I finally did tonight. My dad's first response was a very disappointed sounding "... What...?". Once I explained everything to them, my dad's next response was "Well, I think you're wrong". My mom told me that on behalf of her and dad that they support me and love me, but I could tell dad was not 100% in agreement and mom was also afraid of being too supportive during my dad's ignorant reaction. For the rest of the night, we stayed home and they never said another word to me all night. I could tell my mom was trying to think of something to say to me but she didn't say anything. I'm now in bed trying to figure out how to deal with this moving forward...I was raised in a very conservative and christian household and my parents still attend that same church today. I have a gay cousin who came to my sister's wedding last year with her girlfriend and my family was supportive of them attending. With this in mind, I didn't think that my parents would reacted to my coming out in this way, but unfortunately it looks like this is going to affect my relationship with them for the next foreseeable future.I'm just wondering if there's anybody else who has gone through this sort of thing before and how you handled it. One on hand, I want to tell my dad that I was hurt by the fact that he thinks I'm wrong about my sexuality. But that would lead to a whole other argument which wouldn't help solve the problem at all. On the other hand, I want to try and be as calm and reasonable as possible about it, but that won't allow me to tell them what I really think, which is that I am who I am and that sexuality isn't a choice and I want them to accept me for me.Any tips?
2015. augusztus 30., vasárnap
Not really got anyone to talk to
As I've become more comfortable with my sexuality over the last year (I'm 21 now and it's taken since I was 18 to fully 'get' quite how much I love the cock) my interest in having a romantic relationship with a guy has grown too, but I don't have anyone to talk to about that sort of stufI have few friends and the one I'm closest two is Muslim. While being gay has never upset our relationship, I do know it makes him uncomfortable when I reference men being hot etcetera, so it's pretty off the table to dicuss it with him. I'm not close to my parents and my brother is only 10, so they're out of bounds too.I did have a cousin who would've listened, but he died last year so... yeah. Anyway I'm not 100% why I'm posting this here, I guess I'm just lonely and wondering if anyone has been in a similar position or has a solution?Sorry this is a bit whiney
My 'straight' friend told me he 'likes' me...
I've know this guy for close to 5 years now. He's my best friend, we work together, and spend a lot of time together. He's know I'm gay for all that time, and since then he's dated women and had a girlfriend for almost a year. I've had a crush on him forever but it was closer to a celebrity crush-he was cute and charming but I knew it would never happen. Until this weekend. I went to his place and he said that, while he still considers himself straight, he likes me. He say he misses me when I'm gone, thinks about me a lot, and pictures he and I together. Then he asked me out on a date. I was at a loss for words, and I told him I really just needed to think about all of that. He seemed hurt and we haven't spoken since then. I'm still trying to process it all. If he was gay/bi or whatever I would jump at this opportunity. But...I don't know what to do. Help!!!!
Recently got broken up with, not sure if I can or want to do it again..
I knew him for nearly 9 months. At first he wasn't my type really, but I slowly grew an attraction for his personality and his looks and everything. He was the love of my life. It was a wonderful thing. It's been two weeks since he broke up with me and I'm not sure if I want to do it again. Dating, loving another person, getting to know other people, I can't. I don't know why im posting this, just a little vent I guess. ;_;
This is a rant.
I need somewhere to vent about my feelings and this is the perfect subreddit to do so and because I have no friends and I can't rant to anyone elee. I have a huge crush on this guy. I confessed but he said he was a heterosexual so it sucks for me. But it's been 7 months. I still can't get over him. I tried all sorts of methods but I still like him so much. I know it's futile to think that he'll ever like me but there's this tiny hope that he one day will. I just can't stop thinking about him. The worst thing is, I think he now dislikes me because of my feelings towards him. I know the thing I need is a closure but I just can't find it. I just feel like breaking down and cry. The year is ending soon and once it ends, we'll never see each other again. I just can't bear the thought of not seeing him again. I know I just need to wait for me to forget about him but it hurts so much now that I just want it to stop. Just stop.
don't want to long for a relationship anymore help
So lets start: I am a teenager living in a relatively conservative part of europe and i think that i am gay (i like girls too but i am considering men as sexy and i am crushing on boys so ... Probably gay :D) .I dont want to come out to my family until i have at least a bit experience in gay relationships and am completely sure about my sexuality. I plan on being good in school on my last years in order to study in a big city where i can be gay without my family knowing about it at first.In two years appearently school will be over and i am looking forward to going to college but i have a problem: i am longing for a relationship. I know i should be patient but i often have fantasies about cuddling and kissing and holding hands with another man even when i actually try to do something productive. Please gay guys, give me tipps on how to be patient and how to focus on work.Thanks for listening to my problem :)
lost on what to do next.
So I have already told all my friends and most of my family that I am gay. Still feels a little weird saying it but it feels good. It's been a few weeks now and my issue is that I don't know anyone else who is gay. I have no idea what I am doing and no idea where I go from here. I guess in a way I thought that when I started telling people everything would just fall in to place and I would start dating and all that stuff. Totally not the case, and I feel like a teenager again having to figure out this whole dating thing again. Don't get me wrong it's exciting but at the same time I don't have anyone to lean on or to guide me. I finally got the courage to go to a local gay bar and there was nobody there aside from a few lesbian couples. It was so discouraging. I'm lost and not sure where to go from here. Any help would be much appreciated. Thanks in advance.
Heterosexual slurs anyone?
Are there any slurs gay people use against heteros? The only one I know is"Breeder." Does anyone know any other to add to the list?
[Serious] : 30 yo coming out as a gay in a very conservative / religious family
Hi everyone,I am a 30yo gay male from a very religious and coservative country (Muslim country). I started to live my gay Life at 22 (i mean falling in love with a boy and having my first BF) When i left my country for another more open-minded country.Although difficult at first, i now totally accept that being gay is part of my identity.My last relationship was a failure because of my boyfriend not accepting that i hid my orientation (thus our relationship) to my family.I think coming out is an important step in life, but i just can't'do it easily.I don't really care about society, coworkers, neighbours,... but my parents It's a different storyI know my coming out will be a shock and a source of suffering for them. They have been so good to me that i don't want to make them unhappy, especially that they have health issues.Right now i am lost and can't make a decision. Anyone in my situation? Any advice?Thank you dear redditors
The (very difficult) situation of a gay teen
Well... hi everyone. I'm a 17-year-old Italian gay boy. I'm facing a very difficult period because of my homosexuality. I hope I'll get some advice, but I'm writing here mostly to vent my disperation.I'm gay; I have always known that, but nobody else does. My parents and my friends don't know I'm gay; probably they haven't guessed that because I'm not femine, I look quite straight, even tho I like guys. So, basically, I can't lean on anybody IRL.Why haven't I told them already? Here things get quite tricky. While I'm sure that my mom would at least try to understand how I feel and help me out, my dad is very homophobic. The last thing I want to discover in my life, is that my son is a faggot, I heard him say more than once. I still could tell my mom and not my dad but, you know, she isn't that good at keeping secrets, so I'm still not very convinced. I also have a brother, who is no less homophobic then my father.What about my friends? Well, I have very few. My schoolmates are almost my only friends. This is due to the fact that I'm shy, socially anxious, and I don't like sports (while everybody else does here). So, I'm already quite lonely, and I'm sure I'd become even more lonely if I did came out, because (at least here), no teen wants to hang out with a gay. If you go around and ask someone of my age do you have any gay friends? they'd probably look at you as if you were some kind of weirdo and tell you God, no!Now, the real big problem. There's one of my classmates – let's call him Joe – who's different from the others. We have many interests in common, we are actually very similar to each other. He is intelligent, the kind of guy you can always talk to, who loves to always learn new things and compare opinions about everything, just like me. That's why after 4 years of school together, he is my best friend.But after some years of seeing each other everyday for five hours a day or more, I started to feel something for him. And after fours years, I actually fall in love with him. Little problem: he's probably straight.I'm trying to tell myself to stop thinking about a future together with him, because there will be no such a future. But still, when I'm with him I'm perfectly happy – I feel like I don't need anything else – and when I'm not with him I get sad or even depressed thinking about my future or about what he could be doing without me.We are probably going to stay together and see each other for quite a long time: we are going to start our last year of school, and then I think we'll go to the same University. This fact on one hand relieves me, but on the other hand makes me worry: I can't lie forever, he's gotta know the truth some day. And how will he react? Will he accept me? If he won't, what will I do? Also, he's gotta have a girlfriend sooner or later (in this time I think he never had one). He'll also get married. And what about me?I also thought that one solution could be distract myself. Of course I would be very happy if I found a boyfriend – other then him. But where and how to find one? I can't go around the city asking guys if they are gay. And I can't shout I'm gay and wait for someone to come because – again – nobody got to know that I'm gay.I tried joining some gay-themed meeting websites, and I have only found (and met) three guys who live near me. I like none of them. So what? What's my future gonna be like? Whenever I ask myself this question I get depressed.That's it. This is my situation. I hope you didn't find this long text boring, and I hope I didn't make many English mistakes since that's not my first language. Thank you for your support.
Hey bi guy here looking for info
Hey 21 year old guy here who has been very curious about guys and I feel like I'm getting ready to come out. That being said I have no idea how to get into guys. I don't know the lingo, how things work, and just other miscellaneous info. I mean I get some of it works like a hetero relationship but I'm just looking for some insider info I guess. I'm looking to kind of start sexually with men and then if I feel like I want to I'd pursue an emotional relationship as well
Came out yesterday after years of denial at 23. I've got a question that's really stressing me out.
So I've spent my whole life thinking I was Heterosexual, I was attracted to women and had been with quite a few girls but I never felt right, I would date girls and effectively turn them into a glorified best friend as I would lose my sex drive pretty well immediately and I always wrote this off as just a low sex drive.I had been sexually attracted to men for a long time but not emotionally attracted to them ( I never really allowed myself to actually investigate this). I've been really depressed and anxious over my love life since I lost my virginity. I couldnt understand why I dreaded having sex so much after the first few times with a new partner and I eventually realized that I was socially conditioned to be heterosexual and because men havent been sexualized or fetishized, I didn't know HOW to find them attractive.I think of it like the Mona Lisa. we are told our entire lives that it is a ground breaking and amazing painting without really knowing why or questioning why but it has been deeply ingrained.I'm totally happy and proud of this massive groundbreaking change in my life and I'm excited, I get butterflies thinking about experiencing a relationship that I actually feel good being in (thats never happened)My question is did anyone else have a bit of a disconnection? realizing that they were gay, accepting it but still not used to being attracted to men?I'm hoping that the more used to the idea I get the more I will notice what I find attractive in men but until then I have a very anxious voice in my head that is worried that I will never be comfortable with anyone and remain lonely and reclusive
Little help
I am a virgin and want to have sex with my boyfriend. I am a bottomand want to know what is the best way to clean up. I dont want this to be a shitty experience(pun intended)
Would I choose to be straight?
My name isn't important, but it's Charles, hey! I'm British and I live in Amsterdam. I finished Uni, very recently, and decided to fly to a new country because I'm a wild child and always have been. I landed with a bag on my back and little money and managed to bag a Graduate job in a huge company and get ridiculously cheap, central accommodation sharing with an old guy who does my laundry for me and offers me free drugs... doesn't my life sound unfairly sweet?But it isn't.. because I'm unfortunately gay. I have never fully been comfortable with the fact that I'm gay, it's the fault of being brought up catholic, coming from a small village in Northern Ireland and being brutally bullied psychically and verbally because I didn't act like a little chavy, disgusting, pigboy like all of the other rotten children... and I say children, these disgusting animals were aged 11 and up. The influence of the religious, patriarchal society really knows no limits.This post is mostly a rant, I don't expect responses or thumbs up, I don't really care to be frank, maybe somebody in a similar mindframe might manage to read all of this and find solace that they are, #notallalone . Anyway I lie and tell people I'm bisexual and rock that whole, 'I can love whoever I please' image. But as a 'gay' I must make sacrifices to make sure people know that I am legit 'bisexual' and therefore throughout Uni I did stuff with girls. (I've did more 'stuff' with girls in bed than I have with guys... which is fucking depressing.)Unfortunately all of this did make my life easier, straight males were more inclined to be my friends and didn't care all that much when I crossed my legs during discussions and tried to kiss them when we got fucked drunk. (I've kissed so many 'straight' men.. and by I've kissed I mean they kiss me, why would I kiss something I kind of resent?) I've also pretended to be asexual but that was a strange #foreveralone phase of my life.I'm just so angry at society, how can people not understand that It is perfectly fine to love whoever one wishes. Hell I have never been in long lasting fucking love but I know who I wouldn't turn away if they came to my door at 3am on a stormy night asking to join me in bed...If there was a choice offered I'd be straight, right? ... Well no if I had a choice I would alter the timeline and history of this planet. I would make it so love was celebrated, not feared. There was a time I prayed to fucking Santa(God) to be straight, I cried my little faggot self to sleep, I tried wanking to lesbian porn, I wanted to kill myself, but with age and the numbing process I accepted who I was. I was a normal guy who liked guys...I feel as though if everyone thought like me I could relax. I could try and find a nice guy and get in a relationship and have hot, meaningful, violent sex over a long period. Not do what I'm currently doing and pulling guys drunkenly in clubs and not being able to go all the way down to some kind of guilt complex. I'm also hungup on the fact my most recent guy who I had a year long thing with hates my guts now and I keep forgiving him every time he gets thirsty just because he has a nice looking body... I'm not even a horny person, I just like cuddles, when you are a cold cunt like me cuddles help take the edge off.I don't know how to feel more comfortable about my sexuality, outside of it my life is perfect. I have one of the most approachable, funny personalities. I gather people and I have good friends in all the countries I have lived and they don't seem to care about my sexuality. I'm sarcastic and cynical, but it makes people roar with laughter when I bluntly tell it how it is and loads of people seek my advice on everything, (and they have no clue what swarms in my head 24/7)I dunno, I want a boyfriend and I want to live on a planet where being gay is as normal as pissing and shitting, but at the same time I don't want to lose who I am worrying about this sexuality crap and I am a strong, independent black woman who shouldn't need no man but cuddles in bed would be very nice coming into winter... I'm aware this planet will never change, I will never be able to visit Russia and I will continue to secretly dislike anyone who is religious (even though they are entitled to their, positive or negative, interpretations of their imaginary books)If you made it this far, well fucking done. Upon re-reading It's like a 12 year old scribbled this down but I'm no literary genius and this problem started for me around the age of 12 so perhaps this is my inner childs words and I'm just going along with them.. eh.What do you think? Would you choose to be 'normal' or do you have something to say that might help me progress. More LGBT friends I think is the way forward, I've spent too much time in my own head when it comes to sexuality, I need to know how other minds work.
Getting Over a Crush
Names have been changed to protect the people involved. I have a crush on my coworker, Nathan. I know for a fact that he's gay. There is an unfortunate twist. Nathan is already dating one of my other coworkers, Marcus. I care about them both, so I have no intentions of sabotaging their relationship. I just need some advice on how to let him go. Any input is appreciated, thanks.
2015. augusztus 29., szombat
Am I Straight , Gay , Or Bi ?
I feel comfortable when I make eye contacts with girls ( beautiful, hot ) in college.I always look at pretty girls smiling and they make eye contacts to me.Most of my friends are girls and they think that I am straight.I see a lot of pretty women everyday but I do not feel any emotion.I cannot understand the feeling of straight guys seeing hot women.
I love you, but I'm not in love with you?
Today out of the blue the love of my life for two years said he doesn't love me any more and would like to break up. I'm in such shock and just have had my entire life smashed to bits in one swoop. I've begged him to try to work it or wroth new bit he doesn't want to. Everything was perfect I thought. I recently moved in worth him and now have no where top go. How will I get through this?!
How do you learn to love yourself?
Hey /r/gayI've re-written this post about a dozen times because I really don't know how to start this post. So I'll just say off the bat if you're taking the time to read this, thank you. This post inst directly about being gay, but i'm sorta desperate and don't know where else to post. Warning: this will be long :/I hate myself, but not for the reason you think. I don't hate that I'm gay. I hate myself for everything else that is essentially "me."I have always been "the dork". Nerdy, geeky, awkward, shy, quiet, somewhat smart but not very bold. The nervous one. And it doesn't help my body kind of fits the stereotype too: unattractive, bone-skinny, pale, acne-ridden, glasses, bad haircut, virgin, the whole works. It didn't bother me when I was younger. But as I grew older and was in high school, as I grew to have feelings for other people, I began to hate myself more and more.I was angry . Angry with myself. Angry that my body wasn't like football jocks. Angry I didn't find MTV all that funny. Angry I couldn't connect with peers. Angry that I didn't like sports. Angry I wasn't attractive. Angry I had to be the one with the genetics that made me skinny and acne-prone. Angry that I was a better student then anything else in my life. Angry I was a stereotypical awkward nerd. And this anger, this self hatred, destroyed any self confidence or image I had of myself, any ambition or interests I had, and left me insecure, reclusive, unhappy, which just made my situation worse.I tried to "fix" myself in several ways, everything from working out and a new diet to fix my body, spending more money on "stylish" clothes and better haircuts to fix my "attractiveness", faking interest in sports and failing classes and going out getting drunk partying to "fit-in", getting contacts and acne-cream, etc. But it hasn't worked. It has only distracted me from the true problem: my self image. In the end, I still hate myself for the same reasons.Now that I've graduated high school and am about to start college, I'm looking back and I'm starting to realize that I don't think this stems from myself. I didn't hate myself when I was younger. Instead, I think I grew into this; I think that I was taught to feel and think this way about myself, that this mentality was beaten into me externally.The three people, or groups, that come to mind are 1.) bullies 2.) family and 3.) ex crushes.I've been bullied all my life. :/ I've been bullied because people assumed I was a "faggot" not because I was openly gay but because I was the weak nerdy type. I don't think this would have changed whether I was gay or not. People have always just seen me as an easy target because I was always too afraid to stand up for myself, and it was fun and easy to mess with me.My family has always been kind of rough towards me too. I love them: they have nurtured me and kept me safe. But they, too, have never really like who I was. My mom would always tell me how weak I was, she would always get angry with me because I didn't do sports and call me "faggot" for it as well. My parents always compared me with their coworkers and friends, and would always say how pathetic I was I couldn't make friends and that I just spent all my time on the computer or playing video games. They would get mad at me when I didn't want to have big birthday parties, or wouldn't bring friends over; that I had needed glasses or I had acne break out or that I could never seem to gain weight. They tell me not to like certain things like anime or stuff because they say it makes me a "faggot". They adore my younger brother, who is not only athletic, but also isn't skinny, doesn't need glasses, and doesn't have acne. They always are comparing me with him.Finally, a lot of my crushes on other gay guys have just ended in rejection. Whether directly or indirectly, they've all just told me I'm too unappealing to them, or "not their type." But it was always usually had something with me not being the hot jock type. While I don't hate them for it, and understand this is how the dating game works, it does eventually make you start to feel there is something wrong with yourself rather, as its more likely that then "oh, all those guys are just jerks."Honestly, I'm disheartened and defeated. I'm really, really trying to love myself. I don't think I'm that bad a person. But when I even have a glimmer of self-respect or self love, I end up just dragging myself back down again.Anyway sorry for that long post. What I'm here to ask you today is two things.1.) Did any of you have similar experiences?2.) How do I learn to love myself?Thanks again to all those who have taken the time to read this.
Hello, I don't generally frequent this sub but I have an issue and need advice.
Again hello /r/gay, as I said I don't ever come onto this particular sub often. I mostly stick to /r/gaymers because well I'm kind of a dork and I like video games, but I've been having an ongoing dilemma for several months now and since I don't have any friends I figured I might as well ask all the wise members of this subreddit.I've been in a relationship for almost 4 years now with this wonderful man. He's funny, attractive, and he's incredibly kind almost to the point of naivety. For the past 5-6 months or so things have been really strained in our relationship. His father died recently during that time, and they were incredibly close. Ever since his dad passed my boyfriends been getting into shit he shouldn't, forgetting he's an adult and trying to act like he's still in highschool, and just kind of being mean to random people. Unfortunately this is the dilemma part; I am an insensitive asshole. I am very pragmatic and come from very pragmatic people. I do not dwell on my emotions, and I tend to just throw myself into work until I get over things. I've been there for him and I've tried to help him as much as I can but after 6 months I don't have the energy anymore to be supportive of what I'm perceiving as childish behavior on his part. I'm talking he goes out with a few friends, gets wasted, comes home at 4am and then refuses to even acknowledge the problem. Especially when I've been working all night. He works and he works very hard, but he's late all the time to his jobs which are right down the street because he's out partying all the time.It's been a rough time. We fight almost every day now and nothing gets resolved. He gets pissed off at me for stupid things like paying for our dates or not immediately texting him when I get to work/home from work. I get pissed off when he's out having fun while I'm at work, and when he complains about pretty much anything at this point. I know that I can be more understanding, but at the same time I could never justify getting drunk 4-5 times a week all the while getting home at 2-3am then having to go straight back to work at 8am.We've also had some issues in the naughty Funtime department as well. He bottoms almost exclusively, and he always tells me he wants to bottom and he enjoys it. Half the time though when he's pissed off he'll hold that fact against me. He also is horny all. the. time. He literally never turns the hell off. It wouldn't be a problem is he wasn't always trying to have sex at the most inappropriate times.I'm really at the end of my rope here. I just really need someone to give me that golden piece of advice that will fix everything, or a thirty page essay detailing step-by-step how long the grieving process is and what I should do.
2015. augusztus 28., péntek
24m, closeted, other stuff
Hey reddit. Turning to you, on a throwaway account, as I usually do when I get drunk and depressed. I guess I'm gay. I mean I have to be. I've fantasized about men many times, and I've watched plenty of gay porn. It'd be insane to think that I'm not gay. And yet somehow my brain still disputes it. I still cling to the idea that I can find a girl, get married, have kids, my own kids. I think I'd be more ok with being gay if I was attracted to people my own age. But I find I'm only attracted to men in their 40s+. Which then makes me think I probably have some deep-seeded daddy issues. That I'm not gay, that I've just gotten confused somewhere along the way, confusing sexual attraction with attention from 'dad' figures. But that's gotta be nonsense - straight guys don't watch naked men on the internet, let's be real.I'm not sure the point of this post. I'm just lonely and feeling more than a bit hopeless. I can't stop obsessing about this one guy I work with - he's straight, married, with kids, so obviously not a realistic relationship. That's the bio of most of the guys I've been into. Sucks when you want to be with some one so badly and to understand that there's literally zero chance of that ever happening.I guess I'm looking for advice? Maybe anyone here can relate? What you did/ how things turned out for you?
I'm feeling differently and have a question most have heard a dozen times here
...but I need some help. First, I want to start by saying I'm very far left and very pro-LGBT, I am all for civil rights for all and equality for all and am willing to fight for those rights and defend them every.single.time they come up. Second, I'm confused about something, I want to know what's going on with me. I'm an 18 year old guy who has lost 170 pounds over the course of a year in a half, I'm beginning to get a jawline and tone up, I wear button up shirts with a blazzer over them, which I've had tailored up to fit me well. I wear semi-skinny pants, and a nice pair of shoes. I've been researching how to be an alpha male to pick up women because I've never tried due to low self-esteem. I stand up straight, head held high, and just walk with a sense of entitlement, and speak like I'm talk dog and never look down as if I'm intimidated by someone, some might think I'm stuck up a bit but I was so depressed with such a low self-esteem I want people to think differently of me now. Here lately, though, I've been looking at men differently. I look at how they dress and how they act, and if they're attractive or not (even look at their butts like I would a girls) and some times I hope they're gay. Generally when I get hit on, or can catch someone checking me out, it's by an obvious gay guy, never women*. I saw a man at the gas station today who was incredibly attractive and I wanted to say something about it, but realized what I was about to say in front of my sister and didn't want them thinking I was gay before I knew if I was or not. I just keep looking at men if they are the ideal man and I think I'm becoming more and more attracted to these men. Am I gay or bisexual or bicurious? Or am I trying to get a picture in my head of what I want to look like, act like, and dress like because I'm now having better thoughts of myself in my head? Some additional information if it helps, since I was 14, I've always been into anal. Not receiving, but the porn I watch is never vagina, but always anal because I think vaginas are gross but I'm sure that's common for some men. And my first sexual experience was with a guy, actually, all my sexual experiences have been with guys (just 2, both with my bestfriends). I grow very attached to guys quicker than I do with girls. I have crazy anxiety and being around girls give me anxiety, I feel like I'm being judged or I'm not good enough, or if they're my type or not (and sometimes, it may sound awful, if they're attractive enough or not.) But I'm super comfortable around guys and just really relaxed and happy. Here lately, I'm just not interested in girls, but at the same time I am, because I'm constantly trying to impress them with my style and body, hairstyle and money. I want a girlfriend, I want someone to cuddle up with at night, but I think that's because I've always had this picture in my head that I'm completely straight and want a qt3.14 gf to cuddle with and be with. I have a gay friend who I've had on my facebook since around 2013 (I hung out with him in a group of friends when I was a a young teenager) who has been liking a lot of my pictures and most of my statuses here lately, I'm thinking about hanging out with him at a fair coming up near me and going to a festival with him, might even see if he wants to go catch a movie. Completely as friends, but I want to know if I am or not. Is this a good idea or am I just getting their hopes up and being, in a sense, mean? I would explain to them that I don't know my sexual preference and just want a friend to hang out with. I'm just confused at the moment, the more I think about men, the more I think I want to be with one. Thank you for reading and I hope I didn't offend anyone, if I did, I truly didn't mean it, I'm tired and typed fast because I'm tired lol*My question is, do women even check out guys? How do they act if they're interested or not with someone they don't even know? Guys are completely obvious about it, are girls different? Or am I just ugly to girls but attractive to guys?EDIT: Posted on a throwaway because my other account is completely, 100% politics and I didn't want anyone to read it and wonder about me or anything. Not that I'm afraid of being known as gay or anything, I just don't want conservatives trying to use it as an insult or something in an argument.
I'm an openly gay Russian guy. AMA
Well, it kinda sucks to be me. Maybe you want to know some details.
Just wanted to tell my experience so far with seeking a relationship.
I have been a lurker on reddit for a bit and I have never posted before. This might even be a throwaway account.So, a little background:My former religion was Roman-Catholicism and my family is still very religious. I came out to my parents as an atheist not to long ago and they were shocked at how I could just stop believing. My mother almost went into a kind of depression but my father was more understanding. I defeated my faith when I was in my early 30s and felt so stupid to have taken so long.When I was growing up I thought that if only I could force myself be with a woman and lie about how I truly felt everything would be alright. This felt like a grave abuse to inflict on another person and myself. The next plan was to join the priesthood as no one would wonder why I never went on any dates or showed any real interest in girls. I remember when I applied for seminary I was asked if i had any same sex attraction and I denied it. During the process I learned that had I answered honestly I was have been immediately disqualified by the bishop in my dioceses. I declined acceptance feeling that I was cheating the process. I returned to the church later that night when the world was asleep that the doors were locked. I sat on the steps of the church with my back against the door and wept bitterly and nothing came to console me.I remember a time when I was a teen my mother caught me looking at pictures of men and questioned me about it. I explained that I was merely curious about the size and shapes of men's bodies and how I would develop. She told me that if i had any curiosity or feelings that were leading me to that way of life she would have to send me somewhere. I lied and I am glad I dodged that "Kidnapped for Christ" bullet.I just wanted to protect myself from the views of others and I still do. The closet is dark, cold, and feels safe. I am not even sure what I really want other than to experience what I have denied myself and to be safe about it. Looking back it is clear my life is dominated by fear. I value brutal honesty and wish I could look into the minds of others and see how I am perceived.About three months ago I felt a desire to seek the company of men but I was out of shape and unsure where to meet said people. I started going to the gym and eating properly. I had thought that the gym would be a decent way to meet other guys but that has failed me or I failed it as I tend to avoid eye contact and social interaction with strangers. I mainly stick to the treadmill for cardio and have purchased a variety of weightlifting equipment for in house use. I have gone from about 265lbs to 233lbs currently. I am still unhappy with the way my body looks but I see myself as a work in progress. I am just going to look better with time.A month ago I went to get my hair cut short and when getting to work one of my female co-workers exclaimed, "Oh, look at you. You look dateable now." I thanked her briefly and went inside the building only to receive similar comments from a few other women in the office. I went into the bathroom and stared hard in the mirror and wondered what did they see that I could not and worse was I being made fun of. During my lunch break I asked a female friend to step outside with me and asked her to give me an honest opinion of my physical appearance because I was feeling uncomfortable with recent comments. She told me she always thought I was attractive but with the longer hair it looked like I didn't give a shit and the weight loss has helped give my face looked more defined. I told her this was shocking to me because I had always perceived myself to be unattractive, what she was telling me was conflicting with myself image, and this was probably the first time anyone had ever referred to me as attractive. She said, "Dude you have sex appeal."I decided try and advance my goal and checked to see if there were any local gay bars in my area. The closest one was about 1.5hrs away and the two local bars closed down. I was somewhat relieved because I shy away from social interaction of that kind and would probably just be on my phone the whole time. I opted for dating websites and signed up for several to see if I got any potential hits. I began speaking with two men. One is slow to respond but we talk in paragraphs and the other is quick to respond but I know nothing about him other than what is on his profile and that he thinks I am a "cutie". He was reluctant to share any details protesting that such talk should be left for the first meetup. I arranged to meet with them in the same week one on Tuesday and the other on Wednesday. I felt conflicted trying to figure how this would all work out. Would I like one or both and would they like me? I was to meet with "quick respond guy" first and told him I could drive to him but he wanted to drive to me. I gave him an address to a public place and he never showed up. The second meetup went much better. We talked for about three hours and it was insightful. It was the first time I had ever outed myself to a real live human being. I felt kind of sad when it ended as I felt a connection. I am not sure if I am just latching on to the first experience but he gave me a chance to open up in a way I never thought I would. I told him how I felt in an email and he has yet to reply. Perhaps I scared him off.Now, I come to Grindr. Within the first ten minutes I got a dick pic with the message, "hey, sexy wanna suck this." However, it is very refreshing to see how many guys are on there that are close by. A man in his late 40s messaged me telling me how attractive my face is and we talk for about an hour and a half via the app. I tell him that they only sexual thing I have ever done was get a hand job at 16 ,that I am still working on my physical physique, and that I am coming to terms with people finding me desirable, and that I feel like I am a vers/top. He tells me he is DDF and wants me to top him without a condom. This gave me a huge red flag so I did not go through with it. I feel like I want a relationship and be able to get to know someone before sex. Also I think it is kind of lame to just send a dick pic so easily because it erodes a lot of the mystery. I want my first time to be about discovering one another"s bodies for the first time and be caught up in each other.In the end I would like to know if anyone has had a similar experience and any other input would be helpful. I also don't know how this will come across but I certainly feel just plain in the facial region but I guess it is nice to be desirable to someone. Maybe I need therapy but putting this down felt therapeutic enough for the time being.
A question for gay men who have tried to date women
I am a straight female. I recently broke up with a man I loved, mainly because I suspected he was gay. Please tell me if I was being paranoid. We dated almost 6 months (i.e. the supposed honeymoon phase).By the way, he is over 40 (and never married) so I think he's a bit old not to know his orientation....-He rarely kissed me, but loved to cuddle with me naked-He NEVER touched my breasts and seemed uninterested in them-We had normal missionary sex but he rarely did any foreplay-I surprised him with lingerie once and he just laughed / barely looked at me-His best friend is a hot straight guy in his mid 20s (he sees this guy EVERY Saturday and EVERY Sunday).-He never complimented my looks... but he once blurted out, "I'd love to take you shopping and dress you up in various outfits!" I declined this offer.-He uses anti-wrinkle cream and Propecia, frets about his weight, and works out obsessively at spinning classes (he's in perfect shape already)-He once mentioned having gone to "some bathhouses" with a guy friend but he claimed it was a straight thingI am a bit heartbroken and angry because he wasted my time, and I fell in love with him... Now I need to start over.
SO problems/AskAmy
So my boyfriend of 8 months, for all extensive purposes we'll call him JJ hates PDA and I made it clear that it's a big thing for me for 2 reasons: 1 it raises awareness of LGBTQ, specifically gay relationships and 2 it validates me as his boyfriend and makes me feel wanted and cared for. But JJ hates doing it. A girl he used to have sex with, is now his best friend that shows a lot of PDA but he doesn't see it that way because he's not straight, she's his best friend, etc. But as the boyfriend that doesn't get that, I feel invalidated and think it's super disrespectful because her doing that is kind of like rubbing salt in the wound because she knows he hates it as well and I strive for it because JJ and her talked about it a while back when I was in the room. So I feel as if she doesn't respect me as JJ's boyfriend and that's why her and I don't get along. Am I crazy for not liking her? How should I handle this situation with her and how do I find a happy medium with the PDA thing?
So homosexuality is punishable by death
The *** Federal Penal Code, Article 354 states “whoever commits rape on a female or sodomy with a male shall be punishable by death”.
2015. augusztus 27., csütörtök
Second post.. First off thanks to this awesome community...
I took the advice of the closet friend i have... She's doesn't like the stereotypes... so i just say she likes girl's lol, any how she told me that i should explore more and not be turned off by the last guy... I did and lets say five hang outs later we have success that not all are the same and i becoming more in touch with who i am.... Thanks again you all kick ass
Out to everyone at school, but not family. Should I express being gay on assignments or not considering I don't want my family to find out?
I am fairly young and it's a long way to being independent and I am closeted to my family, but open with everyone at school. My problem is that I have to do an assignment that involves a "romantic interest" for play writing and can't decide if I should make it obnoxiously straight in case my family sees or honest (with gay relationship) and hope my family doesn't find out. Unfortunately, my parents attend my HS's meet the teacher night and I just really don't want a teacher to say anything and doing this would let them know I'm gay.No, honesty is not an option. No, I am not independent so it is not up to whatever I think I should do. I need to keep my family in the dark, but should I do my best to not tell my teachers I'm gay in case they talk or tell my family? I think I should probably just fake straightness, but input would be helpful :)
Coming out....
So this is a pretty shitty situation so here we go. I'm 19, I'm male, and I think that I'm gay. I think I've known this since late elementary school (grade 7ish), or since I can remember really. I've met girls that check all of the boxes for me, but I'm just not attracted to them in that way. Here is where I have some problems. A few years ago I entered the Christian church and I've been following Christ for about 4 years now. This will not change, so don't try to tell me to ditch Christianity, because I believe that there is a god and that he loves me regardless. I've been involved in my church in many ways throughout the years though. I've worked there, I've volunteered as a youth leader there, and my best friend is the one who brought me there years ago. I want to stay involved but I know I won't be able to be a youth leader anymore if they know I'm gay. I'm scared that some of my my best friends and mentors from my church won't accept me, despite how loving and kind they are. I'm not super worried about my family. I know that they aren't discriminative of gay people...at least I think they aren't. And I'm not too too worries aboriginal my non-Christian friends either, I think most of them will be cool about it. I'm just scared I'm going to lose everything I have with my church, all of my friends, activities, everything. I don't know what to do.
My brother's roommate is gay and my parents want my brother to move out. What should I do?
Sorry if I'm breaking subreddit rules with this post or my terminology. I'm not a regular here and I'm on mobile so I can't see the side bar.Three days ago my brother started college. While helping my brother move in my mom started to suspect that my brothers roommate is gay. Today my mom, dad, and I are bringing my brother some stuff he forgot at home. My mom and dad are Christians who don't approve of homosexuality. They want to see Roommate and decide if they think Roommate gay. If they think he's gay they will request that my brother move and get a new roommate.My brother is bisexual and in the closet. The roommate is gay and out of the closet. Parents worry that rooming with a gay person will make Brother gay. Brother and Roommate don't want to deny that Roommate is gay. Brother plans to use logic on Parents by arguing that Roommate is a good student who's orientation is irrelevant and getting a new dorm room would be a hassle. I am not optimistic about this strategy.Brother has a tuition scholarship and parents are paying for everything else. He has never had a job before. In high school he was very smart, but his grades suffered because he had really bad study habits, so I worry that he can't maintain a job and college at the same time.I know this isn't about me, but I might as well disclose my slight conflict of interest. I'm straight and graduated college a year ago, but had depression and no sense of direction career wise. So I've been living at home rent free while my parents pay for my food, medication, therapy, etc. I have a really close relationship with my mom, who kind of relies on me for coping with her own depression. My dad is frustrated with my lack of career and has threatened before to kick me out. We have never talked about homosexuality at home, so I don't know how far my parents are willing to go with this. I'm ashamed to say that I don't know how far I'm willing to go to oppose them.Do you have any advice for what I or Brother should do? Right now Parents and I are driving and will arrive at Brothers college in an hour. No pressure folks.
Straight guy editing Gay porn. Need advice.
Hey guys!So, I am editing porn (of all kinds) for a startup, and we are all amateurs here.Our Gay Lead has given us a lot of footage of people playing with each others cocks, but no one really gets hard, not for long, and there are no cumshots, no finishes.Our lead says that that's hot right now. We doubt that, but we don't know for sure, because we're straight.So I'd like to know from the gay community, is hard fucking and a strong finish as important for gay porn as it is for straight? Or is just "lots of dick" what matters?What are your opinions?
Sexiest hair colour?
Hello comrades. My hair is currently a disaster area due to a bad dresser and a colouring mishap, so in the interim before I get this floppy headmuff sorted I figured it'd be fun to find out what hair colour you guys consider, in general, to be most appealing?
My mom took me to a psychiatrist
My mom took me to a psychiatrist so he can treat my "unnatural tendencies ", and he's actually trying to treat me with some weird goggles and lights, wtf is going on!?
I am East Asian male, and I am into Sikh bearded middle aged gay. Am I Curry Queen ?
I am East Asian male, and I am into Sikh bearded middle aged gay.In gay slang language, there are Potato Queen, Rice Queen, Sticky Queen.So I think that I am Curry Queen.Curry Queen: A gay male who prefers to date (NOT necessarily older) Sikh/Indian/Hindu/South Asian men.I also like Chubs and Bears.Most old Sikh men have bear/chub features such as big belly, gray hair, and beard.Most gay men live in modern western/westernized culture and lifestyle.I am not interested in "modern culture" because I feel that ethnic culture is exotic, and interested.
trying to change the subject when you're hanging out with straight friends.
https://youtu.be/2cLPFfk0lSU
2015. augusztus 26., szerda
My BMI is 27.5 so Am I Chub ?
My BMI is 27.5 so Am I Chub ?My face is not fat, just average , but my belly and my legs are fat, plus big butt.
What do you think of my (Very Long) Coming Out letter to my Parents?
So i just finished off writing my Coming out letter, and (hopefully) plan to give it to my parents sooner rather than later. I'd just like some feedback on it if possible. And yes, i know its really long but i feel like it gets across all the points i needed to make.Dear Parents - I’ve tried to tell you this for so long, but especially over the last few months. It seems, however, that every time I do, the words just don’t come out or it’s not the right time for me or it’s not the right time for you… I realize that I no longer have a clue as to when the “right” time would be. Actually, I think I’m just waiting for it to be easy and I know that is not going to happen. What I need to tell you is that I’m gay. You may have already guessed. You may have not, I don’t know. I’m so worried that this will change the way you see me. I’m worried that you are jaded and influenced by society’s attitudes towards gay people. I’m so scared that assumptions and stereotypes and fears will take over and nothing will be the same between us anymore. What could possibly be going through your mind while you read this? I’m so afraid that you will feel betrayed, hurt, embarrassed and angry. You have a right to those feelings, to an extent, but you need to wipe out all the stereotypes you carry, and realize that I’m the same person I’ve always been. So, where do I start? as a kid, I sure as hell didn’t know what to call it, but I remember knowing I was different. In high school, I tried to deny it. For so long, I made a conscious decision never to tell anybody as long as I lived. I remember actually telling myself i would rather live alone for my entire life if it meant people never found out i was gay. Can you imagine the feelings I had deciding not to tell anyone about being gay…because the world thinks it’s disgusting? I knew the world thought that this part of me that I could not change was revolting to people. All I wanted was to be accepted and all I saw was this huge part of me that would forever deny me that feeling. I grew up knowing I was something the world, at best, mocked, and at worst, loathed. Can you imagine the pain this caused me growing up? The loneliness? The constant worry that someone would “find me out?” I don’t mean to sound self-pitying or melodramatic, but you need to know. I always knew I was different and that this difference was, by society’s judgments, bad. Imagine knowing something so intrinsic about yourself and having to hide it from everyone you love because you’re afraid they will stop loving you back. Imagine having to put on a mask everyday and pretend to be someone you’re not. Then, one day you realize that the effort it takes to pretend like that everyday has stopped you…me…from being who I really am. I stopped knowing myself. Imagine trying not to have feelings that come totally naturally to you. It was so awful. To have to hide half of who I am from everyone I love has hurt so much. You can't even begin to imagine the pain i'v gone through looking at my family and thinking to myself "All of this could be gone once i come out". Do you know how scary that feeling is? How hopeless you feel when thinking that? Of course you don't, you'll never know how it feels because society views you as "Normal" and views me as "Disgusting" and "Wrong". I can't even begin to count the amount of times i thought of suicide when i was a young kid. Always having nightmares that somehow my family found out i was gay only to look down on me, leaving me with the only option i could think of by killing myself with a knife. I had these thoughts and nightmares at such a young age, we're talking around 7-10 years old. The worst part is i couldn't reach out to anyone for help. The reason i was suicidal is because people around me told me that being gay was wrong and bad. My own family taught me that being gay was gross, perverted and strange. I knew i was gay, and didn't necessarily like it either, in fact i feared it and hated it. But i knew i couldn't change or help it. I was trapped. The only thing i could do is deny that i was gay, hope that these feelings would just grow out of me and go away. Repress any thoughts that i had, control every slight action that i made that might seem "Stereotypically Gay". It was horrible. I avoided any topic that had to do with Gay people so then i could escape acceptance. I wasn't ready, i was scared. But like anything important in our lives, we can't run away from our problems. We must face them head on and accept them. I’m so glad that I’ve finally come to accept it…to accept myself. I’m who I am and whoever can’t handle it can fuck-off. Brandon [My Brother] has known for a few months now. Of course you already know how awesome he is about equality so he has been super supportive of it. Couldn't of asked for a better brother. I've been openly out to all my friends for around the same amount of time too. This has helped me in so many way's. Everyone has been 100% supportive of me. I feel like it's really helped our friendships and I'm so thankful for them being in my life. I think I've really felt like my friends in a small way have been more of a family to me than my own parents have, and i really hate that i feel like that. I shouldn't feel like that, there shouldn't be a reason for any son to feel like that. It's just so hard to feel loved an accepted by my parents when i see you guys hating gay people on TV, or calling someone a "Faggot", Calling something or someone gay because of the way they act or present themselves. These reactions affect me personally, not just because I'm gay but also because its hateful bigotry towards other LGBT people (Lesbian,Gay,Bisexual,Transgender). Some of my friends are LGBT and we all deserve the same level of respect and dignity as anyone else. Every time you say something offensive about gays whether you mean it or not, it effects us and stops progress on an all accepting society. I remember talking to Mum about something one day and she told me how she was worried that i would "Turn out gay" because of the way i was as a kid, and i told her even if i did why would that matter? She said "No one wants their son to be gay, you know?, its just wrong. It makes me feel a bit sick thinking about it.". To you it probably was never meant to mean anything, especially since i told you for so long that i was straight, you probably don't even remember the conversation. But things like that have stuck with me all my life and I'm sure you can see where my fear of coming out to you has come from. I know I'm probably going to deal with a lot of bigotry in my life, and i don't personally have as much of an issue with that because i can handle myself, but what i can't handle is having that bigotry come out of my own family's mouths. That's when it hurts and effects me.And look, i know you probably didn't even know, and never actually meant the things you said. I just don't understand why you felt these things in the first place? If you were so scared to have a gay child, then why did you even have children? You must have known it would have been a possibility. And if you're really not scared, then tell me why someone would say such hateful things about someone? I just don't get it, and i want to understand where your hate or fear or dislike comes from. Because it has to stop. I hope you realize that the reason I’m telling you is so you can be a complete part of my life. I don’t want to have to censor myself around you or not tell you about the people I care about or, more important, about the people who care about me. I want to feel comfortable being myself around you. A few weeks ago you pointed out that i look sad all the time, and i think this is one of those reasons. I don't want to be sad anymore. If someone told me I could take a pill tonight and wake up straight tomorrow morning, I wouldn’t do it. I like who I’ve turned out to be and some of that is because of the things I’ve had to deal with in terms of being gay. It's made me accept myself for me, unconditionally. It's helped me accept my flaws and not care so much about what others think of me or what i do. I finally feel comfortable being me in my own skin after so many years of feeling "Different". Please realize that sexuality is not a choice. You didn’t sit in sex education class thinking, “Gee, should I like guys or girls. Time to decide.” Ridiculous. I was born this way. It is literally genetic, meaning there is no choice and there is no change, it just always is. You were born straight. I was born gay. I did not choose to be gay. I’m not sorry I am , but it wasn’t by choice. Why would someone choose to be something that society can’t accept…something that makes life so much more difficult than it already is? I hope you realize that gay men aren’t attracted to every man they see any more than straight men are attracted to every woman they see. Gay men who are friends do not automatically sleep together. Gay men are no more promiscuous, gross or deviant in their sexual behavior than straight men and women (we just get more press time about it). Ignore all the stereotypes and shit you see in TV or Movies. Most of it is bullshit. And, contrary to popular belief, you can’t always tell when a man is gay. I hope you understand what a huge effort it takes to tell you this. I’m scared. At the same time, I respect that it may be difficult for you to accept. (I mean it took me so many years to accept it too. You may not care (ideally). You may feel really uncomfortable with it. Or, you may have guessed and dealt with it a long time ago. I really have no clue.I’ve heard a zillion different stories about parental reactions. Parents crying, but saying it didn’t matter. One set of parents completely abandoned their son. One mother wanted her son to be in therapy to heal this “disgusting disease.” I've seen so many people who say they’ll come out to everybody except their families. That’s not what I want. I don’t want to have to censor myself. I don’t want to have to alter my stories so they're “straight.” I want you to be a complete part of my life. I know what I'll have to go through, dealing with people who disagree. I've accepted that, you don't ever have to worry about me. I can handle myself. I also am fully aware that i come from a family who isn't exactly fully accepting of gay people, and yes I'll have to deal with their bigotry too, and I'm fine with that. I really don't care about what other people in the family thing about me, they can think what they want. What i do care about is my parents. I love you guys and I'm sure you feel the same. Now you could be like some parents out there who kick their own sons/daughters out of their house just because their sexuality isn't what they expected, you could contribute to the thousands of gay kids who take their own lives every day because their parents disowned them for being gay, or you can be the loving caring parents I've known for so many years and accept me for who i am. It's your choice. Of course i have fears for my future. I fear that i may never be looked at or accepted in quite the same way a straight couple would be. I fear that i can never show my affection and love for my future partner in public, or in front of family. I fear family members that heavily follow religious beliefs will disown me and never see/talk to me again. I think i'v showed some jealousy of Brandon over the years because i fear that you would treat my relationship with a partner differently than you would with his, simply because his relationship would be a straight one. I'm sorry too if this letter comes off a bit angry or self-pitty, but I'm really just trying to give you guys perspective of what its been like for me for so long. It's not even really your fault to an extent, you were likely brought up by a society that told you being gay is wrong. Correct your mistakes, show me that you care. That's what being a good parent is about. Also, please understand that my orientation is not the result of bad parenting on your part. You're both such great parents, and have taught me so many good things. If anyone is to blame for my pain over the years, its society. Not you. I just wanted you to see what its been like for me. So yeah, that's my letter. Over the past few months i'v just been writing down any of my thoughts and experiences here, so if it seemed a bit messy that's why. I hope my points came across clearly, i'v found i can get what i'm thinking about in text form much better than talking about it. I'm sure you have a lot of questions, and I'll try to answer them as best as i can. I really want us to talk about this, as often as you want, because talking about subjects like this gives you prospective, clears up stereotypes and in the end helps create acceptance and understanding. I don't want this to be something you continue to avoid, because that's the main reason homophobia is still around, miss informed people who are to afraid to understand something that they just don't understand. If there's one thing you can take from this, is that since coming out to my friends I've been the happiest me I've ever been. I'm finally comfortable with myself and i don't want to hide that from my family. I want to be happy and feel accepted around everyone, not just my friend group. I'm sick of hiding and there should never be a reason why i can't feel happy, safe and accepted around my family. I am tired of half truths and deceptions. You deserve a son who lives honestly and truly as you raised him. I deserve a life free of the crushing weight of a millstone of lies, doubt, and hate. I hope from the bottom of my heart that you will support me. Your dear and queer son, STRF125L.
Can Asian Gay get European tattoos ?
My Asian-American classmate told me that do I like tattoos. I answered him that I like tattoos. So he showed me some of his favorite tattoos pictures on Internet. Most of them are Yakuza/ Asian tattoo such as Dragon, Tiger, ...I showed him my favorite tattoos pictures. Most of them are Viking, Celtic, Lord of the Rings themed tattoos.My classmate said that my favorite tattoos pictures are just looking good on White people, and looking not good on Asian people.He encourage me to get Asian themed tattoos instead of European tattoos.Should I get Gnome/ Dwarf tattoo ?If an Asian man have Gnome/ Dwarf tattoo. Does he look silly ?
I think I've realized I should start finally accepting that I'm gay
I know, that title doesn't seem very confident. Well I'm not.I'm a 23 year old guy. When I was 12 I first had the thought pop up in my mind. 'Am I gay?' I got a girlfriend a few years later and although something kinda was always missing (not confident, again) I brushed it off as me being a sensitive man and stuff like that. I had a hard time 'coming' with my girlfriend but enjoyed sex and felt in love.When I was 18, this girl I thought I was in love with and messed around with kissed a friend of mine, i started doubting more and more. I felt like my inadequacy involving 'getting the girl' had to do with me being gay. I felt like the truth was I didn't really actually want her. She was just a thing I made up for me to avoid accepting my gay sexuality.I tumbled into a depression, anxiety, and the thought popped in my mind so much you could almost label me OCD.Now it's 5 years later and nothing has changed. I'm still doubting. Huge chunks of my day actually. It's always close in my mind. I'm very self aware of how I talk and how I walk and what I say, I don't want to do anything gay. Now this is the biggest problem I have. This internalized homophobia. It's disgusting to me and I feel ashamed. I change how I come across to avoid dealing with the suspicion of me being gay. Because when people ask me, I wouldn't no what to say. Because I'm confused. So now I just say no. Maybe I tell them I think some guys are attractive.I told my parents and some friends about my doubts. They assured me I wasn't gay, since I layed my confusion out for them. They would be pretty much completely accepting if I were to come out, so that's not the problem here.My problem is the constant fear involving my confusion about my sexuality. I rarely feel a severe attraction to girls anymore, they've sometimes showed interest in me, sometimes really beautiful girls some guys would kill for, and I just kinda chickened out. Left 'm hangin because of my insecurity or maybe because I'm just gay.My attraction to guys is not clear either to me. I do catch myself admiring men more than girls. I get obsessed with men in arts, such as comedy and music. I couldn't name one girl I've been obsessed with in that way. So yeah, that doesn't seem very straight. I might be bisexual but I don't know how to deal with it at all. Sometimes i think I'm just depressed and mentally fucked.I watch mostly straight porn, wich I had a hard time really enjoying like I thought straight guys would but the last year I really got into it. Gay porn I usually feel pretty weird after watching it but it does turn me on.So, as you see, still the same cycles of reasoning I've been stuck in for years and it's grinding away at my soul.Sorry for the long and rambling post, I hope I gave an impression of what my mind is like so you can understand and maybe offer me clarification or advice or maybe someone recognizes my situation.
Is it okay that I'm angry?
So I found out today that my ex, who I've been crying over for a month now (we dated on and off for 6), was only using me for sex and as a rebound. Is it ok that I'm the angriest that I've ever been?
How did you meet you partner
Just wondering how people meet and maybe even what you did to get the persons attention or start to like you.how did you meet your partner. Not you partner. Sorry
Help wit getting boys
So there is this boy at work and I'm pretty sure he likes me and I think he knows I like him but we can't really talk because we work in different departments and it's almost impossible to take a break or lunch together but we usually talk when we have one together or we try to meet up with each other during work by other means. We are both going back to school but we sorta haven't talked in a while and just recently became friends on Facebook and Twitter. Any ideas how to start a conversation that wouldn't seem weird. When ever I try to write something i get really nervous and delete it.This is my first gay crush and am just starting to accept it. Sorry if this seems stupid but I'm really nervous about this.I have dated girls before just saying...
2015. augusztus 25., kedd
Hey, friends.
Hey, I'm just a little tipsy. :) Anyway, I felt like saying hello. I'm gay, but I don't have a lot of interaction with other gay communities. You people are a pretty good "lifeline" of other gays that I can connect to with when I need to feel than connection and be reminded of who I am. You all are pretty cool, and I just felt like sharing that. In the words of my high school electronics teacher, "you do you, Boo-boo."For those who need something to comment about, feel free to share how being connected with your "gay community" helps you as a person, and what that's like.
Please help me, I could really use some advice.
First of, I just want to say I do not hate or condemn anyone and hope my words do not offend anyone.Ok, having said that, I'm almost 24 and I'm having a crisis of sexuality/crisis of identity.All my life I've been unequivocally straight but only in the last 3-4 months I've been doubting myself. My biggest fear has always been the fear of being gay so I guess that would make me homophobic. Not because I hate or fear gay people but because I fear it in myself.To date I have I can't say that I've ever found myself sexually attracted to other man, at least not that I'm consciously aware of but doubt has crept in. I was very very bad with women in my early 20's to the point where I couldn't talk to them at all without alcohol due to massive anxiety and a few of my friends mentioned they thought I was gay due to this. That happened around 3months ago...Ever since then I've had terrible anxiety and depression including panic attacks, almost to the point that it is debilitating some days. I wake up every morning and the fear and doubt is literally the first thing I think of. I find myself imagining sexual scenarios with other men, not because I'm attracted to them but because my brain is creating them in order to 'test' myself. I also find that because of the doubt I'm literally trying to force myself to be attracted to every woman I see and if I'm not it creates more doubt, thus I feel like I'm barely attracted to women. As a result my libido has dropped creating more fear and depression yet whenever I'm with one of my (female) fuck buddies I can just let go and I'm super into it.Being so bad with women when I was younger, all I've ever wanted was to be good with women, (a ladies man) if you will. Now that I finally am, my whole identity revolves around my sexuality and being the player that know I have no idea who the fuck I am, what's real, what I believe or what reality is...All comments welcome, especially if this sounds like anyone else's story, and again I mean no offence, I just need help.Thanks in advance, I know this was lengthy.Edit: I just want to add that I've told my parents about my fear and I even accepted the fact that I am now a gay man/will love myself regardless if that is the case, but the fear, anxiety and especially depression are only getting worse.
I finally told my brother I'm bi....and problems with a coming out in the future
I have been bi for most of my life but I guess I didn't realize it until 8th grade but even then I kept denying it all the way up until the end of my junior year and I graduated in 2014 from highshcool. Since then I have told two of my friends and one of them thought I was joking at first. He was cool with it when he discovered I was being serious and we still hang out frequently as he is a very close friend. However tonight I finally told my brother. It was really hard for me and he kept asking what it was and jokingly he asked.....do you like men? I said yeah. He was a little shocked but is perfectly fine with it and I feel really good right now, like a weight has been lifted. Now I need to tell my parents eventually....that will be very scary although my dad has asked before a few times (and he was serious) and said it was ok if I was but I denied it.The thing that bothers me is some of my friends say that there is no way I could be gay or bi, because I guess I don't come off that way at all. I ride dirt bikes, shoot guns, paintball, played sports, I workout a lot and not flamboyant in any way (not that it's bad). I guess it just goes to show that there is no definite way to tell if someone is gay or bi.I just had to post because I feel way better now that someone in my family knows....sorry for the long text....thanks for reading!
This isnt normal.
I seem to of convinced myself that i goto a school that im only just enrolling in, and that i have a cute boyfriend that drives me home everyday, and i keep thinking to myself "When is Josh going to call me next" but obviously he isnt. First of all, why. Second of all, how do i stop.
First timer story, Part I
There is no one with whom I can share my story, other than you, Reddit.I am 38 years old. I've always been a big guy (body... the package is small). I really let myself go the past few years. This year I began eating better and working out. I've lost 3 pant sizes in 5 months, haven't been this size since age 30.Also, my testosterone is through the roof, but my wife is in a "down" period, and has some temporary troubles "down there". We've done it like three times in the past 6 months.Also, since I was about 20... I've been bi-curious. And this past weekend, with my sex drive high, I had known for weeks that my wife would be out of town for the weekend... Do you see where this is going?Yah. So early in the week I began responding to Craigslist (cl) adds. Had a couple of conversations that were more introductory than anything.Went to a strip club (women) Friday night. I had been... um pleasuring myself a few times that day. I did have like 6 lap dances with a cool nurse (paid for 4). And I had my first ever man on man hookup that night.This story is not about that night. I did receive/exhange oral and do ass play with a 29 year old. I sucked him for 45 minutes. Neither of us orgasmed. I was so nervous. We never looked at each other. But his cock and body were awesome.So all day Saturday I was horny, looking for more... and pleasuring myself. I almost made another hook up before dawn on Sunday. That dude was a no show. Cl lessons learned.My wife was to return on Sunday. Mid-day, she texts me that she is staying an extra day. All day I am fapping, browsing cl. I gave up in the afternoon, and decided to go swimming (as exercise, gotta keep it up). I posted a cl ad entitled "Chub for cocksucking" which read:"I am going swimming in my town tonight.Would be nice to shower off, look up my phone and have an invite for some fun.I am into giving and receiving oral, and want to too for the first time. I love other chubs too.Message me with a body pic.Discretion is a must. I am married and "straight"."So, soon before I prepare to leave, I get a response:"This sounds like we may be a perfect match, I'm also married and looking to suck for the first time. I'm 25 and in from out of town. I can host at my hotel."He included a pic, and he had smooth skin, a nice little package, and a belly. He had a hotel room too... he was hosting![To be continued...]
Any other gay guys with one testicle?
I'm a successful, attractive, and athletic 33 year old guy. In college, I suffered an sports related injury where I lost a testicle.I get hit on pretty much everywhere I go, but when guys notice I have one nut, they usually have a problem with that. I've tried to be upfront in dating profiles, waited till they noticed, and casually have brought it up. None of those happen to work. Any other guys in a similar boat or has anyone dated a guy with one ball before?For guys with 2 balls, how would you react to someone with one ball? Would you want them to tell you before or would you rather it come up in conversation after you've hooked up?
why do i want a boyfriend so bad?
first time posting here so hi!im an early 20's guy and i keep finding these great guys who have things in common with me and then pushing them away quickly because of how enthusiastic i am at finding someone who i like.but it sucks for me because i really really want a relationship and i have no idea why its such a big thing for me, all i know is i eat up tons of my time thinking about what could be with people its not going to happen with.does anyone have any advice for me ? i need to break my cycle of meeting great guys them rapidly making myself un-likable.why do i want to be in a relationship above everything else!also don't suggest hookups its not for me :p
How does gay sex really work?
I've always wondered how gay men decide how to have sex especially anal. How do you decide who gives and receives. Is penis size relevant? Do you take pain killers during or after. Is it actually pleasurable for some on receiving end. Please explain.
Chance encounters that brighten your day
When I went to my local phone operator shop last week because I was having problems with my account, I was expecting to be made to wait around trying desperately not to look like I was robbing the place until someone was ready to see me
Survey for LGBTQIA+ people: what would make healthcare better?
You may have seen an earlier survey I posted about LGBTQIA+ experiences with healthcare providers. Queer patients face some unique challenges in getting high-quality care from providers. Well, this is a survey I'm helping a medical school classmate with that looks at it from the other direction: what do you WANT from healthcare and healthcare providers? What kinds of conversations have you had versus what kind would you like to have? What's your wishlist? We're hoping to help educate current and future docs about what patients would like to see. This is text-heavy, but probably will take less than 15 minutes.http://ift.tt/1PQB72i you have questions or comments about it, please feel free to ask me! I'm technically a co-researcher on this one (and a queer woman myself) and I'd be interested to know what you think. If you participated in the last survey, we still absolutely want to hear from you on this one. And please do share it if you think you know people who might be interested!
Gay dating now seems like a Catch-22
So over the past 12 years or so I feel like the more experience I get at gay dating the harder it becomes to do it successfully. In my experience it seems like a Catch-22 formulates and with each subsequent new person to date the choice becomes increasingly difficult.What is the Catch-22 you ask? I find that if you are attracted to a guy and would like to ask him out that if you show this kind of interest, the other party treats it like you've given up your power. By this I mean they now know you're interested and therefore there's no challenge for them (damn hunter instincts) and so they act very passively because if they show excitement back they've given up their power in return which they have 0 incentive to do. If you as the asker show any further excitement or interest in the date, then you become even less of accomplishment to secure a future relationship with and even risk turning the guy off.If on the other hand you remain at just the stage of asking someone out but show no further push to get together, then the other person feels like they have to do nothing either because you're the one that asked them out and if you don't push to get it done then you must not actually be genuinely interested in putting the effort into dating them.TLDR: If you ask a guy out, he feels like you should do all the work. If you seem excited about going out, the other guy will find you less attractive. If you don't seem excited about going out, then the other guy assumes you're not really interested.
2015. augusztus 24., hétfő
How young is too young to come out?
I don't know how I'm supposed to do it. How am I supposed to stay in the closet? I really want to for now, but it's a huge weight on my shoulders. I really want to tell everyone, but I feel like I wouldn't be taken seriously. "Oh, it's just a phase" pops into my mind. No, it's not. I want to tell my friend (see here), but I feel like it wouldn't be an appropriate conversation topic at 14 years old. For my parents, the age comes to mind, as well as the phase thing, as well as the fact that they are very conservative. That shouldn't be a problem, but you never know. The only thing they said about the recent Supreme Court decision was that they thought the rights should be there, but the government shouldn't be a part of it (doesn't the decision get the government out of it?). Would it be appropriate at my age to come out?Sorry for beating a dead horse, and any extra information should be in that link. If it isn't, feel free to ask. I look forwards to your responses!Thanks!
What is something you often hear gay men say they want in a man, but you think they wouldn't like if they actually got it?
I saw this on /r/askmen, so thought I should ask here.
This really shows the attitude of most 'peaceful' muslims towards other minorities such as homosexuals.
https://twitter.com/hashtag/muslimdragqueens?vertical=default&src=tren
What should I do now? :'(
Hello folks.This is a continuation from my last thread here, http://ift.tt/1Kg1EpA saturday we partied, we went to a club and I had to go out (too many people) . After 30 seconds he came out of the club too. I was already drunk so yeah. He came after me and we took a long walk, we sat on a bench, I said some sweet words and we began to make out.(my first kiss with a boy!) After that we had to come back to pick up our friends. While coming back, we held hands together through the whole city ( yay! ). After we picked up our friends we went home and I walked him home. We made out again before he left and that was it for the night.Now that sounds amazing right? NOPE.Today I talked to him about starting a boyfriend relationship. He said that he feels the same as before, that he cant start a relationship yet, and cant see himself having a boyfriend in the near future. That broke me apart, I almost started crying and I didnt know what to do. I did have 2 choices: 1. to let him go 2. to keep chasing and hope for a miracle So I went with it and before he left I said to him: '' I respect your choices and the way you feel, but Im gonna keep chasing you to the worlds end, and one of these days youll become mine and I yours anyway. Im not gonna push it, but Im not gonna give up on you. ''Yup, I played a tough guy and I still feel the same way. I dont want to give up on him and Im gonna keep chasing him.After he left, like 20 minutes later, all the frustration and sadness hit me at once. I don't honestly know what to do, I need to vent this out. I havent eaten anything since and I keep throwing up like a madman. What do I do to make myself feel better? :(
Walk Around Mexico City's Vibrant Gay Area (Like London's Soho)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Obk1Z_Xi49M
Transgenders in the military?
I recently got into a discussion with a friend of mine who called me a bigot for my position on accepting transgenders into the military. We're both army brats, so we both have parents and other close ties to the military. I said that transgenders should be allowed, but that they should serve as the physical gender they are, regardless of self-identification, as the military should not redirect resources from vital operations to make a person who has not undergone surgery feel more comfortable (example: allowing a physical woman who identifies as a man to be allowed to serve infantry, which is not an option for cis-gendered women) . I said once they had undergone the surgery, it would be totally fair for the person in question to request they be reassigned gender quarters etc. I also said that the military should not be required to pay for the procedure, as again, they need the money for other operations and it is not their responsibility. I would say the same to those with disabilities. My logic is, is that the military is not the civilian world; it is a service and a job and it does not exist to make sacrifices to serve you, you make sacrifices to serve IT. My friend (whom identifies as the other gender) got angry with me and called me a bigot, so I'm kind of concerned now. Is my position really that unreasonable/ignorant?
2015. augusztus 23., vasárnap
How to meet people
Ok first off I'm a 16 year old male and I am the only gay that is at my school. Since I'm to young for any apps and I want to meet people how should I. I don't know many places I could go and I'd like some input on it. And I live in Iowa if theres anything for specific states. If u answer thx a million😊😊
Need relationship advice
My bf (Sam, for the purpose of this post) and I have been together for over 2 years now, and it's been wonderful so far. However, I've noticed some things in the last few months that have bothered me.We met each other on A4A, and he kept his account after we got into a relationship. I've asked him about it and he says that there are friends be talks to on there. I left it at that and called it good. Quite recently, though, I found out that he downloaded Tinder on his phone.Now, our sex life isn't great, admittedly. I work 40 hours a week, and the bf's home alone while I work. He travels for his profession, and he stays with me when he's in town. I don't often feel in the mood after work, but more importantly, there's the issue that I don't like giving or receiving anal. It's mostly because I was in an abusive relationship where the guy would coerce me into anal sex, even when I wasn't in the mood.Sam and I talked recently, and he expressed that penetrative sex is important to him because it gives him a different (and better) release over just fooling around. I get it, but I'm worried that this may turn into a dealbreaker if things keep going the way they are.So, does anyone have any advice? I love this man with all my heart, but I don't want him to resent me for not being comfortable with penetrative sex.
Couple general questions..
Any guys out there with fordyce spots willing to post a pic? I know it's a lot to ask, but I would rather have a better idea before spending money to see a doctor.Also, tips on cleaning to bottom?
Cool Part of this summer
So the camp I work at has always been a safe place even as a BSA camp. When the decision to allow lgb(bsa has no official policy on trans) leaders and volunteers in Scouting everyone cheered. It was super awesome. 1/3 of the staff this year was not straight. It was a joke that I was the leader of the Shadowy Gay Cabal. Every couple of days a new staff member would come out citing me as one of their inspirations. Its cool to be my 7th year on staff and finally feel like its becoming the norm and not me as a minority. The only part that sucked is I got involved sexually with someone who got fired, so the last few weeks were a little lonely.
I need help..... I am dying to tell my best friend how I feel about him, but I don't know if he's gay or not. Advice?
So, ever since i can remember wanting a relationship, I have wanted to be with one of my childhood friends (since the 3rd grade). We fell out of touch around the start of high school; part because we went to different ones and part because I became quite depressed for a number of reasons.Now, I'm going into my last year of high school and I'm beginning to get head straight and my life back together. I recently got back into contact with him and we've been talking like we used to. I just.... can't bring myself to tell him how I've felt. I don't even know if I should. When we were younger, he kinda gave the impression that he was into me, but he also had (not sure if he still does) a girlfriend.I have more to say, but this has gone on long enough... if you can give me some advice, I'd appreciate it.... I'll probably put some more details in the comments....
Clever way to hit on a bag boy
What is a good way to ask out a grocery store bag boy?Puns are most definitely welcome.
Why isn't self defense and learning to fight embraced in LGBT culture?
Alright lads I'm not gay myself but my older brother is and the majority of his friends and a couple of mine are. growing up I wasn't really aware of homophobia and violence against LGBT people, but in the last few years I've seen the shit my brother and friends have to deal with it makes me sick and worried about them because they don't know how to defend themselves. When there is so much hate and violence directed towards gay people why isn't self defense and learning to fight embraced and encouraged in the culture?
Reluctant to Lose My Virginity (X-Post from /r/askgaybros
Posted this in /r/askgaybros but also wanted to post here to get more/varied input.I'm a 30 year old bi guy. I often fantasize about sex with men but have never done anything with them. I'm open with myself about my attraction; I love to wear panties and girly socks and I'm dying to be with a guy for the first time. I wanna be a bottom, for sure. I want a guy to treat me like a girl, tell me I look pretty while he fucks me.Problem is, I'm really hesitant, and it's hard to pinpoint the reason. There are a lot of factors and I'm sure most of them are pretty common feelings for gay/bi guys in my position.I feel like, ya know, fantasizing is one thing, but once I actually do something with a guy, that's it; no going back after that. I mean, that's a pretty big thing. Irreversible, ya know? Whenever I come close to hooking up with a guy, I always dwell heavily on this.Another thing is, whenever I get really horny and am thinking I wanna hook up with a guy, I work myself up real good... talk dirty to myself about all the things that he's gonna do to me... then I eventually just jerk off and afterwards I'm like "eh, I can do without it." Because of this, I always imagine the hookup playing out like this in my head: I set it up, the guy's coming over soon, I work myself up so much and I'm so horny that he barely touches me and I bust my nut and then immediately lose interest, at which point I'll either have to just soldier on and hope I get horny again or stop the whole thing and now the guy's pissed that I wasted his time. After replaying this scenario in my head over and over, I just decide to jerk off and then the whole problem is gone for a little while.When I get to fantasizing about it, I really get myself worked up... I feel like my dick is going to explode, I want it to happen that bad... then I think about it think about it think about it and just end up talking myself out of it.Tl;dr wanna have my first gay sex but keep talking myself out of it.Anyone have any thoughts to share on this?
2015. augusztus 22., szombat
why did he get so weird??
i hooked up with this guy 2 times the second time he couldn't perform and stated cuz he wants to be with me and cant stop thinking me in his house now mind you i cant give him what he wants and stated so several times now hes send me random fuck you messages ... why could he just be a good top and me give it up to late nights help me
Need Advice: How to get into a "serious" relationship? (as a male model)
Greetings, So I (m/19) came out last year to everyone (successfully), but since January this year I am constantly trying to get into a relationship. And I mean a relationship that is longer than just a month. As a model, this is painfully difficult; sadly, this is not a joke. Every gay guy I met so far just wanted to have sex with me with no interest in a long-term relationship. Not that I would complain about the sex part, I just want to be in a real relationship. I get reduced to my body only, and this bothers me a lot. Do you have any advice? As I am fairly new to this (online gay dating scene), what dating - app(s) would you recommend? Where are the differences? Greetings from Europe
Coming out help
I've told a few close friends now that I'm gay, but can't seem to tell more people, even though I know I want to. The weird part is, I am not ashamed with who I am, but it's still a hard thing to tell people. Any advice? I've been wanting to tell some members of my family, but chicken out whenever the opportunity presents itself. What do you think about telling people over text message? I feel like that would get the hard part out of the way and open up to more communication.
How long does it normally take you to get over someone?
So a guy I was seeing on and off for six months is now out of my life for good probably. He was my first for pretty much everything. It's been a month now and I still feel like someone is standing on my chest when I think about him. How long does it normally take you guys to get over someone? For some reason I feel like I should be over him already since it only took him 3 weeks to get over me and go on to the next guy.
Need advice about trying to get a friend to come out of the closet.
Some back story: I'm straight, he's (most likely) gay. We are both mid-20's, in graduate school, and from liberal families. He's pretty obviously gay: never had a girlfriend, makes excuses to not date, has gay affectations etc. Everyone is completely fine with him being gay...his friends, family, colleagues...nobody has a problem with it. However, he's an immigrant and has family in the middle east that would gossip about him and probably bring some shame on his family. I'm pretty sure this is the reason he won't come out. But frankly, he doesn't live there, and he's old enough to just tell people to fuck off if they're like that.I'm pretty sure he wants me to just secretly have sex with him and have it all stay in the closet. He wants that to be his reality. That won't work for obvious reasons and it is seriously disrespectful to me. It actually creeps me out quite a bit.I've had many many gay friends before and it's frankly not that big of a deal to me. But he really needs to come out and live honestly for a few reasons. He needs to not live in this fantasy world where he and I are going to have closeted gay sex. And I really don't want to watch him try to marry some girl, which would obviously be a horribly selfish and cowardly thing to do. I also know that he's setting himself up for a lifetime of horrendous mental anguish with all of his denial. Lastly, it's just annoying to have him go through tinder/other dating apps and talk about how straight he is and how much he wants to have sex with these girls. I don't say anything, because it's a touchy subject for him, but every time he does that I'm just like "ok, dude...you really need to stop with this nonsense. I don't care that your'e gay and you're not proving anything to me with this ridiculous charade."So ya, any advice would be greatly appreciated. I seriously don't know what to do anymore and I don't know how much longer I can take this.
Just found out my ex cheated on me
For 6 months before we broke up. We have been separated for about 2 months now, why does it hurt so bad though. I just feel really stupid right now
Being in London
Hey not sure if this is the place for this but I couldn't find where else to put it. I'm currently in London for work, and my bf is joining me here next week. We don't know anyone but it would be nice to go out to a club or bar and have some people to hang out with. Aside from hanging out if anyone can recommend some good clubs/bars that would be awesome too. I'm 24 and my bf is 19 so prefer something with a younger crowd. We are NOT looking for a hook-up/threesome (sorry to disappoint :P).
2015. augusztus 21., péntek
Years & Years - King (Gaycation Edition) [parody]
https://www.youtube.com/attribution_link?a=Q3Cx9RGAp7U&u=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D30w_mXZbIyE%26feature%3Dshare
What makes a person "creepy"?
I feel like I have a knack for getting hit on by creepy guys. For example, I met a guy through a mutual friend. He asked me out for lunch, which I thought was platonic. That night he was free and decided to meet me and a few of my friends for drinks.. we got drunk and he starts wrapping his arms around me like we're a couple.. oh goodness, and grindr.. all the people saying "come cuddle..."But I got to thinking about it, and had I been more physically attracted to those guys, I likely wouldn't of found it as creepy to be honest...What do you think?
Help....
I'm straight and I think gays should have equal rights. However I recently gotten a friend mad at me. I told her that even though I think LBGT people should have equal rights and not be discriminated against, I still disagree with the lifestyle. I personally don't think it's natural or whatever, but as long as I'm not spreading hate by directly condemning people it's okay to disagree with it. She got mad at me for saying it's weird... I didn't mean to be offensive though. I think LBGT members should not be discriminated against. It's your life, do what you wanna do. She's saying that if I don't support it all the way then I'm a bigot ass hole. EVEN if I'm AGAINST hate for the Community and say it's wrong to hate, she says I'm still spreading hate by thinking it's weird. I said I keep it to myself though. I don't go around randomly preaching my beliefs because that would be wrong of me. But even if I think it's odd, I'm still a big ass hole even if I'm keeping it to myself while saying if gay people wanna be gay, let them be gay. So... what's your thoughts on this? I'm confused.
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