2016. február 29., hétfő
Bf problems- He doesn't know what he wants to do in life
I never thought to ask strangers advice because I'm usually the one who offers the logical solution to relationships issues. I've helped family and friends and complete strangers. Sometimes I feel you can be so deep in it that you don't see the most logical solutions because your emotions have clouded your judgement.I've been in a relationship with a guy for over 5 years. We are getting married this year. We've both had many relationships and there's no doubt we want to spend our lives together. We have had many bumps over the years but we've always talked through them and come out better. He's always been supportive in what I want. I'm career driven and when I'm in a funk I identify what bothers me and resolve it. I like to talk it out and he's always been there supporting me whatever I decide to do. I don't like letting things fester and I don't like to ignore problems. It makes arguing a bit challenging since I want to resolve things right away but he'd rather let things blow over or at least let things simmer. Sometimes he's right, sometimes I'm right. We compliment each other very well in this.He's my best friend. Whenever I have good news I want to share he's the first person I want to tell. We love doing everything together. We have the same interests, taste in music, tv shows, etc. Sex is awesome! We have quirks that we both find endearing with each other. He has a weird obsession with Pokemon, and I get obsessive about something once a year (loose leaf tea, candles, books, infusers, etc) and get everyone around wrapped up in my crazy addiction for that year. We have great friends and family all love each other.There's one thing wrong with this otherwise very happy relationship. While I'm very happy with my career, he doesn't enjoy what he does. He doesn't have a bad job but he's always making it sound like I'm doing amazing things and he doesn't feel any fulfillment in what he does. He's worked in the same industry for 8 years, but he hasn't tried anything new. If I don't like something in my job or feel like I've grown stagnant, I change it up. I just changed jobs and I'm very happy with it.He complains about work and feels unappreciated. No matter what I say to explain to him why he's so great in what he does, he doesn't feel proud of what he does. Where I see opportunity, he sees criticism. He feels like he doesn't make an impact like I do. He avoids talking about work with people who ask him how things are going. He jokes constantly with friends telling them to hire him, but he's never serious. Whenever we talk about what he wants to do, the answers are always the same. He doesn't know what he wants to do. He tells me he will figure it out. But he doesn't like talking about it. And it's not just me he doesn't like talking about it to. No one. His family, friends, coworkers... He keeps it all to himself and every so often rants to me about it. Every time he does, my answer is the same. "What do you want to do to change it". We've both known the real answer for a while, he doesn't know how to figure it out.That's our problem. Whenever we've had arguments/debates/discussions, there have always been logical solutions and compromises. But this is different. He wants to figure it out. He doesn't do anything to help figure it out. He doesn't like to talk to me about it. He doesn't want to talk to anyone about it. I'm not trained to navigate through the human psyche to help him out of his rut. I've suggested seeing a psychologist and he's gone through with it last year. He stopped because they both thought he's on his way. But he's back to the same place. He doesn't think talking to someone help when I suggested to see a psychologist/life coach/career coach.I don't like seeing him miserable about his job. He isn't proud of the work he does. He doesn't realize how dedicated and hard working he is. Whenever he complains he wants to quit, I tell him he should and find something new, but he doesn't do it. It's familiar and unchanging. He sees me happy with my change but I feel he doesn't think the same could happen to him. I keep telling him nothing will land on your lap, you have to seek it out. We've done this dance for 5 years and I don't see it changing because he's not willing to figure things out on his own and he doesn't like talking about it with me or anyone. Surprisingly we constantly push each other to do new things and it's always an experience when we do it together. I feel like he doesn't want to solve this one together, and rightfully so. I also don't see this as something I should be figuring out for him. It's not like we need the money. I alone make 6 figures salary without bonuses. We don't have kids and finances isn't an issue. I just want him to be happy with what he does in life because seeing him happy makes me happy. Seeing him sad about something and not being able to help him with it makes me sad.I don't know what to do.
I'm coming out to my parents via letter in a couple weeks.
I am 21 and have known since I was 13. My parents are both very religious and have bashed the gay community my entire life growing up. I have no doubt they will continue to love me and support me after having sometime to process. However, I am very fearful they would say something if I came out to them in person which would stick with me for the rest of my life and they would regret for the rest of theirs. I look at the letter as an opportunity for them to avoid that after taking a few hours to process it. I thought about sending a LGBT+ book for parents with it. Does anyone have a suggestion?
Grindr hookup
Hey, I just moved to on-campus residence at university (Australian btw) and went to a nightclub for the first time. I recognized the face of a guy I saw on grindr, so when I eventually got back home, I invited him over to my apartment. As we were both drunk as fuck, all we did was spoon and fall asleep. As someone who has moved from homophobic, rural Australia to a city, I just wanted to get that off my chest.
He wants to Skype!!?
So I met this guy online (we actually live really close to each other) and we've been texting for a couple days. He asked if I wanted to Skype tomorrow night.You guys I'm freaking out. What do I do? How do I make this not awkward? What should I wear? I don't exactly know what I'm nervous about, so just tell me it'll be ok or something
Looking for someone to chat with
Hey, I am a 17 year old guy from Norway. I'm just writing because I figured it would be nice to talk to some other gay guys, seeing as how I'm not out. Preferably someone around my age, but it is not the most important thing. Send me a PM if you are interested :)Regards, misternorway
Gays in metal music? I need some help
I know it isn't usually the most common genre you hear about having homosexuals in.I am Bi/Gay and the lead singer for an extreme band out here on the west coast. Although everyone that has expressed an opinion towards me has been positive (thankfully) it is a pretty hard thing for my mind to cross. I had repressed my feelings for several years but wanted to change up my life a bit and realized I (at age 22) have never dated anyone. I came out to most people I know, but I'm still afraid for how I would be perceived if I brought a guy around. My closest friends/bandmates support me 100% but I have these nagging thoughts that the fanbase and work I've put in for the last couple years would be thrown out or naming me as a "gimmick".In straight-forward terms, I feel as though I can't be a part of both worlds. In other words, I got past the coming out part and can't take the next jump.
2016. február 28., vasárnap
Moving to San Diego
So i will be moving to San Diego in two weeks! The Navy has decided that its time to spread my amazingness out west so here i go! Being from a small town in Mississippi and being in DC for my first duty station, it was a real eye opener being exposed to an active gay community. So i'm just curious....what is San Diego like? I'm sure we all have opinions, but any feedback is appreciated. Thanks!!
Trouble starting the coming out process
I'm 22 years old and I'm gay. I've know for a while (like 6 years), and now I'm finally ready to come out of the closet to the people that are close to me. The problem is that I don't really know how start doing that. I have two people in mind that I would want to come out to first, but for some reason I can't seem to force myself to tell either of them. One of them is a really close friend of mine, and the other isn't as close, but she's a lesbian so it's almost guaranteed she's not going to have any sort of problem with it.The friend that I'm really close to already has a hunch that I'm gay, because we were having a conversation and she asked me if I like guys, and I said "maybe" in kind of a joking way, and she didn't seem to have a problem with it. I couldn't manage to say yes even though it's the truth and I really wanted her to know. It's been so long since I've known, and I guess I'm just so used to being in the closet that I'm scared to come out even to the people that I know will be accepting and supportive, because it's such a massive change that people will know my real sexuality for the first time in my life.So my question is, how do I start? I have people that I'm pretty sure will be fully supportive, but where do I begin? Do I just text one of them and say that I'm gay? Should I call them to tell them, or wait until we're in person together? Whenever I'm about to text one of them about it, I convince myself that they're busy or asleep or whatever, and it's a bad time to text them about something so serious.So I guess I'm looking for advice about what to do. I'm just so sick of being lonely and I want to have friends I can actually talk to about stuff. Thanks in advance for any help.
Is it ever a good idea to move locations based on trying to help your son in the future.
So my son is only 9. My wife and I feel strongly that he will be bisexual or gay when he is older. For various reasons. He might be straight but our money is he will be gay. That is fine. We have no problems with that at all. We just want him to be happy. He is already acting very depressed and we worry as the teenage years approach that his depression will get worse. I'm lucky enough that in my line of work I could possibly move anyplace in the USA or Canada. The town we live in now is very religious and anti-gay. One of the thoughts we had is maybe we should pack up and move to a place that is more gay friendly. IE: Portland or San Francisco. Is this a good idea or completely dumb idea? Would you have been happier if you patients did that for you? Or is this just a gigantic waste of time? Another idea is to move to a place that is sunnier due to some research that says more sun equals less depression. Any thoughts on this?
First negative opinion
So my boyfriend and I have been together for three years now. We are both out to the vast majority to our friends and family and are comfortable with who we are.We have and are grateful to have people around us who care for and love us. Up until now, we haven't had any negative opinions thrown at us directly.Tonight, my best friend's fiance and I were having a discussion. It came around where I was trying to equate it to homosexuality to (what I thought) put my perspective into terms she could appreciate.When I asked her if homosexuality were against the law and against someone's religion, should my boyfriend and I have the choice to be open with ourselves and other. She informed me that she does not think so. That if it is against the law, then there is no choice. Then it is wrong to be gay.I don't know how to react. How to feel. I feel so much. Anger, sad, frustrated, confused. I know that this is lightweight compared to what others have experienced, but I just wanted to vent a bit to you all and know that it resonated.
Do homophobic family and relatives ever come around?
This post is going to be long, so heads up.First things first, I'm an open gay guy, an Asian from an Asian country.I was outed by my parents on my first date (I was told by my dad I might need a psychiatrist, OUCH!) and then I was like yolo so I came out to my friends, a simplified version of my coming out story. But after my parents outed me, we fought for a few days after that, then we never talked about it for awhile and my parents just thought I was "cured" or I simply "changed back" to being straight. One day, like after 2 years after the incident, I was talking with my mom about love thingy, like I had a crush on this person and all sort of things, I was asking like should I tell the person about my feelings. And yes, I was being vague about the gender. Then after all the talking she said I should tell him, at that point she still thought the person I meant was a girl and she wanted to see "her" picture. So I gathered up my courage and show my mom his picture instead, the moment her eyes landed on my phone screen, her face turned sad and disappointed, and of course mine too. I tried to keep it positive and told her being gay is actually normal and nothing is wrong with it. But she keeps saying this is a bad thing or a sin/karma thingy (she is a devoted Buddhist), I could see her eyes were getting wet and then my dad came into the room and broke the awkwardness. He didn't know what we were talking about, I told my mom not to tell him before he came in which I hope she kept the promise. But that's the another stronger yet sad reason I know my parents may never accept me of being gay. So, since that day, things were back to just like what happened before, my parents pretend I'm straight and we never talk about me being gay anymore and my parents would always say I would find a nice girl to marry and start a happy family with kids of our own, it's like they are trying to brainwash me. Then like a year after, which is today, I was talking with my mom over the phone. My mom and I, we are like best friends, we talk pretty much everything except you know what. Then I don't know how, the topic went to my younger brother acting a little bit feminine and my mom's like she is afraid my brother is gonna be gay someday, so she talked some sense into my brother and he acts a little less feminine now, she relieved. Afterward she said, my female cousin was acting like a boy, you know, short hair, never wears skirt, playing basketball, my aunt is really worried she is gonna be a lesbian, so my aunt scolded her and told her she would disown my cousin if she ever turns out to be a lesbian.My heart just sank as soon as I heard what my mom said. My mind wondered as I was so, confused, overwhelmed, I don't know, it's just I felt so bad. Hearing my mom saying that is like there is this part of my life that my parents are just not going to be there and they would never want to be there for me. With what I said on top, my parents are the conservatives, and worst of all we are of an Asian family and I am the oldest son. Some of you may not know but being the oldest son bears the pressure from the whole family, like you know when you name your kid, the kid takes on the father's last name. The last name passing on to the next generation is a VERY BIG and IMPORTANT thing for the Asian culture (Chinese in particular), especially from the eldest son. Which, fortunately or unfortunately? I don't know. I certainly do not see it that way. And for my parents, or my whole family, having kids means the business between the husband and wife, even though either of the parents is infertile due to various reasons, searching help from doctors to have IVF or to have surrogate mother, is looked as very unnecessary and not natural. So don't even mention adopting a child, it is like a bad omen, adopted kids would always be different cause your blood doesn't run in their veins. So yeah, being gay, for my parents is nothing but disgrace. Another reason I think my parents don't accept me of being gay, it's because they're afraid people around would look at them like a freak, like because you have a gay kid, you are bad parents, you gave birth to an abomination of human. I don't really know how to elaborate more in words but having a gay kid is just very very very very very bad for them. I really hope my parents could come around someday but I'm just afraid it's never gonna happen in this life time.So I just wanna know is there anyone with similar experience but their parents just eventually accept it? Or if they don't what did you do or what would you do? I could really use some advice/ opinions. Thanks.
I broke up with my boyfriend, and lost other friends too.
My boyfriend and I were together for three years. Im 18. He's 19. We both had same group of friends until I broke up with him. I discovered that my bf was doing hard drug so I told him that it's not worth it. I was heartbroken. Somehow, the conversation got more tense. I ended up asking if he could promise me not to do it again. He replied that he couldn't keep promises. So I told him to make decision between drug or me. With all my caring, he chose drug. So I told him, I felt cheap. Drug beat me. I decided to walk out of his life because throughout three years, he broke my heart 4-5 times already. It reveals how little I meant for him. I was not his first partner, but he was my first love. After, I chose to end our relationship. Friends also left me and choose him for drug. They all made me feel like outsider and the wrong one. At one point, I had to apologize to the man who chose drug over me because I felt like I was the wrong one. Right now, I have one friend left. One friend who doesnt do hard drug. The thing is, that friend is my ex's brother. My ex was pissed at the brother for seeing me and told him not to hang out with me. He probably did the same thing to the other friends as well. I guess he wants me to suffer of loneliness by eliminating everyone I know. He succeeded. I am very lonely and vulnerable at the moment. Because I cared for his well-being, I lost everything in one day. Please help me.
2016. február 27., szombat
No love on (xpost r/SandersForPresident) Sebastian Castro - Feel The Bern [NSFW YouTube though...]
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ftxGoYXGV6E
Japan (GAYCATION Episode 1) - Ellen Page and friends go visit Gay Japan
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NnrAISE6x08
I'm Bi or Bi-Curious or just a weirdo?
Ever since I was young around 10, I was sexually attracted to guys, but I come from a Muslim background (no longer one) so I thought it was the devil fucking with me. Fast forward eight years at 18, I left Islam, read about LGBT rights, history of gays etc. Also that being attracted to same sex was normal. But here is the problem, I'm also attracted to girls too, but I can't see myself in a relationship with guy. I consider myself open minded or maybe I'm not or have problems. I have done couple sexual things with guys and enjoyed it. I'm bi or bi-curious? I'm weird or are there others like me.
Understanding sexuality as you age
I have to use a throwaway account because it is a very embarrassing subject to discuss. It's very personal and all I want for the moment is your opinion no matter how blunt it is.Case is I am a 32 male, medium height, a little chubby, not all out of shape as I work 12hrs a day on my feet moving back on forth. I smoke cigarettes and I like to smoke pot regularly. I don't drink much at all (I used to when I first turned 21). I don't really exercise and I mostly eat take out... Not really into fast food.Here is my sexual issue...I suffer from performance anxiety... Every time I am with some one I lose my erection and it can be difficult getting it back on... Sometimes I have to lay back and really concentrate on getting hard while I beat it back into position. Guys try to suck me hard again but the truth is that I never really enjoyed receiving head... It would feel good for a while but after a minute it's kinda like "ok I'm bored" and it's always been like that for as long as I can remember... And only once I've been able to cum while a guy sucks me off. And now receiving oral could be an erection killer, as to before where it would just leave nothing but a hard sloppy dick unable to cum because it is simply not my thing.It sounds like a health issue right... But here is the tricky part.I have no problem getting hard when I am alone, I get frisky and load up a movie and I'll be fine. And if I know that the guy I am hooking up with is a total top that doesn't like to give oral I will stay hard the entire encounter... And sometimes even cum while getting jerked off and fucked at the same time. And once in a blue moon I would turn around and fuck the top.I like fucking men, I was a top for most of my 20's but now it feels like such a chore... And I still do, but now it's more mental than physical. Also my desires have gotten dark and some how I feel desensitized from most common sex... Now I get really turned on by being a total sub, or worse anon sex encounters where I do not know who the top is and it is fucking exhilarating.But sadly it leaves me unsatisfied, because some how in my fucked up mind I have ruined vanilla sex and now require a 50 shades method to stay hard...Thoughts?
Ask GAY GUY ANYTHING.
48 years old. Out all of my adult life. Things are different now than they were when I was a kid. What do you want to know?
sad
Ask a therapist what mixed-messages mean. Doesn't seem like this is not going to work-out. Get a Japanese person to translate what you've posted here and get a response. Ask the Japanese translator too. Never mind you've fallen for him, Protect yourself. It takes a year to get over someone you really like...
(Survey/Charity) Are you a gay man in college/grad school? I could use your help!
Hey there! I'm a 25-year-old gay guy who is earning his Ph.D. in psychology. I'm working on collecting data for my dissertation, and the sample I need is gay identifying men, aged 18-25, currently enrolled in college.Also, for every survey completed I'm donating $1 to The Trevor Project, a 24/7 suicide hotline for LGBTQ youth and young adults. The survey would only take about 20 minutes to complete and is totally anonymous. Shoot me a PM or reply to this post if you're interested in taking the survey! It should take approximately 10 to 15 minutes to complete.Also, if you happen to have contact information for a GSA/LGBT-related club at your University that I could send my survey too, that would also be really helpful. Let me know if anyone has any questions!Thanks, Daniel
Dating a Japanese Guy...Need advice
Sorry this post is kinda long, I could use some advice..I'm an american with a Japanese boyfriend. He's only lived here a few years. We've been together for five months now and we've hit a bit of a bump. I've had a few people suggest to me that the issue might be cultural, so I'm looking for some insight...Everything was going great for a long time. We were very close. Our schedules are very different from each others, (I'm 9-5PM, he works from 4PM-11PM most nights) but still we'd chill at each other's apartments some nights and we both have Sundays off.He went home to Japan for 2 weeks. I took the morning off from work to go with him to the airport. He had decided to come out of the closet to his parents which he was very nervous about. We talked regularly during the two weeks and I tried my best to give him words of strength. He came out on his last day there and it went better than expected, though his mother was still upset she accepted him. His dad was fine with it right away.I had hoped to surprise him at the airport when he got back but I couldn't get there in time. We had just had a snowstorm over the weekend and the subways were running badly. I figured he wasn't expecting me so I didn't think anything of it. Plus I figured he'd be exhausted from traveling.The day after was his birthday. He had said he wanted italian food and to visit the new world trade center observation deck. I was looking for italian restaurants online but i also knew he was a fan of thai and i knew a great atmospheric thai place. So i texted him saying "hey i know you said you wanted Italian but I know this great thai place if you're into that instead?" I figured he'd either say yes or that he wanted to stick to Italian. I also suggested having dinner that night and visiting world trade on Sunday. Most Americans I know don't have a problem with continuing birthday celebrations on the weekend after their birthday. He said he was cool with both.Birthday came, he seemed a little off at first but came around after some wine. We had a great night, went to a bar after. Sunday came and again we had a great time. At this point btw he changed his Facebook status to in a relationship (i had already done this but didn't tag him because he wasn't out of the closet yet). But then the next weekend approached, he told me he'd rather hang with a female friend on Friday and me come over Saturday-Sunday. No problem. But then he said he didn't want me coming over Saturday either. I asked if something was wrong and he said he wanted to talk about something s to make our relationship stronger. I was baffled because everything seemed wonderful.Turns out he was disappointed that I didn't meet him at the airport but it was ok because he knew i thought about it. And he didn't understand why I brought him for Italian food and he really wanted to go to World Trade that night, even though we went on Sunday instead. We talked it out. But the next time I saw him he was very quiet, very sad. I insisted he tell me what was wrong and he said he was still really disappointed about his birthday. We talked it out again. I felt terrible about it. At this point btw we'd been saying I love you (he initiated) and all throughout his trip to Japan he was "I miss you i miss you". So what seemed so minor to me was having an intense effect on him I didn't understand.The worst part was that he wanted to only see me Saturday-Sunday for awhile. And he wanted to postpone meeting my dad which I was really looking forward to, as was my father as he'd never actually met anyone I dated. I was waiting for something serious. This all had me very confused and rather gutted.I talked with my Singaporean friend about it, he's very insightful when it comes to Asian culture. He told me that Japanese guys sometimes don't say how they feel and that they love grand gestures. I said it's like he lives in a romantic movie and my friend said... exactly, very Japanese.So Valentines day I made a plan. He was being a little quiet at dinner but not as sad seeming.I presented him with his gifts... A gift certificate to his favorite store, a stuffed animal dog (his favorite breed.... i know super schmaltzy but he likes that kind of stuff) and a surprise that I was taking him to a Valentines day haunted house (he likes haunted houses and we had to cancel our halloween plans because i was sick). I nailed it. He was thrilled. He grabbed my hand and was so happy. We had a great night together. He was so happy that he felt like he could talk to me. That night he said "I don't want to lose you ever." And we were back on to visit my dad (i hadn't told my dad yet that he wanted to postpone). He came over the next day and we had another great night. He was super cuddly.Then...everything changed again. He was being super quiet the next Sunday. And not as physically close as normal. That night I had to ask him to sit with me while we watched TV. He lay down and put his head on my lap. Few days later I asked about trying to spend a few hours on the weekdays together because he's going back to school soon and is going to be even busier than normal. He didn't answer.Now here's where I really need advice...he says that sometimes he's really happy but sometimes he gets really sad and feels like he doesn't love me. (OUCH). There does not seem to be any particular reason for this. He also wanted to postpone our visit to my dad again because he knows it's really important to me and we should go when our relationship is stronger. He also wants to only get together Saturday-sunday. It was back to where we were. And he assured me there's nothing I've done wrong. I'M SO CONFUSED. I've really fallen for him. I can't help but think when he says "sometimes i don't feel like I love you anymore" there's something else he's trying to say. Like i don't think he means it as cruelly as it sounds. He insists that he doesn't want to breakup. He also insists that he doesn't know himself why he feels the way he does. I suggested that he's overwhelmed. He's thinking of switching jobs, he just came out to his family (and some friends), he's going back to school and this is one of his first relationships. He had told me awhile back that his last boyfriend was really mean to him so he gets scared (hence his overreaction to the birthday thing), i told him i'm not that guy. I don't cheat, and don't ignore him. It's the back and forth that's killing me. And the thing about him not wanting to spend too much time together confuses the hell out of me. If he still wants to be in a relationship then what difference does it make? I barely see him as it is. But he's insisting on a Saturday-sunday schedule. I considered maybe he was cheating but I REAAAALLLLY don't think he's the type. I don't know what to do. He says he wants to change his feelings and doesn't know whats wrong with him. I don't know if this stems from a cultural difference or if it's just him. I could really use some advice here guys. Sorry for the length of the post!
I keep falling into the same trend and I would like some advice
I've always known that I am attracted to men. I've been dating guys for about a year and a half now and have had about 5 sexual partners. Every time it becomes the same deal and I can't figure out whats wrong.When I'm with a guy I end up getting turned off by nearly everything. Overly kissing turns me off, cuddling turns me off, basically anything that is romantic is a put off. The only thing I can do is have sex with a guy and after I feel kinda gross. I always hope it's different with the next guy but it hasn't been.Here's the worst part, the guys that I am really attracted to are straight. It's been a pattern of mine to befriend a guy, become really close to them and eventually have strong feelings for them.What's wrong with me? Why is it that I can have these strong feelings for guys that are straight but guys that are gay I get put off by. It absolutely makes no sense and has even made me question my sexuality at times.Any advice or comments would be helpful, thank you for your time.
Crawling back in the closet for work
I'll start off by saying that I'm 26 and have been completely out since I was 20. I don't have any stereotypes that would give me away as "obviously gay" and people are always surprised when I tell them I am. Anyway, I recently moved to a new area and recently took a job that is in a different town and is a particularly conservative company and work culture. I'm hoping it will be pretty temporary until I find a better "career job." I was totally out at my last job and it was great. Though, I'm thinking about keeping my sexuality under wraps at my new work, but it's frustrating.Have any of you had to crawl back in the closet for a job? What were your experiences?
32 y/o bi/predominantly gay trans guy looking for help.
After ranting about this particular problem to a few of my friends recently, I have decided to seek advice from all of you here on Reddit.I am a 32 year old transgender guy (female to male). I pass quite well, have a short beard, I’ve had top surgery, etc - a friend of mine has said I’m something of an otter. The issue that has come to the forefront recently mostly has to do with my dating life, and I’m feeling a little lost.I’m bisexual, but I’ve always been much more interested in men than women (I’d argue that I’m primarily interested in women for flings and casual relationships), and as such about 80% of my dating history has been with men. Those men were all straight. Since I transitioned (about 4 years ago), however, I’ve only been dating women because it’s a dynamic I’m familiar with, albeit from the other way around. I really would prefer to be dating men, however, and this is where my frustration lies.To be quite honest, I’m pretty intimidated by the idea of dating a man as a man, because it’s not a dynamic I’m familiar with at all. I don’t even have any friends of that orientation to turn to for advice or example. Add to that the complication of being trans and of having to explain that (though I am very up front about it, FWIW), as well as some internalized issues regarding not feeling like a “real” guy, and I’m feeling a bit adrift. I enjoy the relationships that I do have with women, but it’s just not really the same, and lacks the deeper connection I generally feel with other men, and I miss that. I generally aim for other bisexual guys because my anatomy is less likely to be an issue, but the intimidation/unfamiliar dynamic factor is still there.I’m not sure what I’m looking for regarding advice from you all, but I would greatly appreciate any that you might have for me about any of this. I also don’t mind answering any questions you might have (clarifying or otherwise) if that helps.
Everytime I have sex with a new guy I lose sleep for days/weeks out of fear for STDs
Even after using condoms and checking for bumps around the crotch, I still manage to lose sleep for days after single sexual encounters. Last time the guy didn't even cum but I managed to freak out for 5 days because a week after the fact I got a rash on my ass on a thursday and couldn't get a doctors appointment till tuesday so she could tell me to maybe start washing my underwear once in a while. I cried for fucking hours completely convinced I had contracted a minor STD like herpes. fast forward to last night I had sex with somebody 10 years older than me and looks kinda skinny and unhealthy...I haven't been able to sleep longer than a half-hour worrying about having contracted HIV even though we had safe sex. now I have to fucking wait for weeks before I can fully feel better about this.Can anybody relate or give me some advice to calm myself down? I try to tell myself "what's done is done" and look up promising statistics citing about a .2% chance in transmission on average in my situation, but still can't manage to stop staying up worrying about HIV, even as the very managable condition it is today
Want to die but not kill myself
So I'm a 16 year old in high school and I've been depressed for the past 4 years when I moved away from my home town. I was and still am nostalgic and feel like I can never make good friends again. To make it worse is that I'm gay. I live in a very liberal area but that doesn't really matter to me. I've always wanted to be able to have my own kids, have a wife and get actual children of my own. There's just something about being gay that I really dislike and it isn't really a societal thing. Anyways, since I live in a liberal area there are plenty of gay people here but everyone who is out is an extremely stereotypical gay person. Feminine, annoying voice, etc... Big turnoff for me. I'm still closeted but I've been trying to get a boyfriend for the past two years and I feel like It's impossible. Literally every single guy I've ever liked is straight. There's nothing I can do about it. I've tried getting to know at least 10 guys and every single time I start asking about their life they all have girlfriends. I just feel so frustrated that I can't find someone who is gay who isn't feminine and just normal. I feel like shit almost 24/7 because It's all that's on my mind. Being gay just feels like a curse that for a while I just wash I could disappear without killing myself, because I don't think I'd be able to do that...
2016. február 26., péntek
Let's talk about daddy issues
Hi, r/gay. I'll get right to it. I came out to my dad in my mid teens. He died three months later after being in the hospital for months (unrelated). Those three months, I barely visited him because everything was just so awkward between us. I could barely look him in the eye, much less talk to him. I beat myself up everyday for not talking to him more then. One of the few times I visited him, the look in his eye killed me. It was indescribable.I'm an adult now. And I have what I guess you would call daddy issues. Although it's not exclusive, I can't deny that I'm very attracted to older men and the stereotypical relationship that would go along with. I'll be blunt, I want a man to fill in the hole my father's death left in me. I know it's unrealistic. I know it's whatever else you're probably thinking about saying right now, too.Normally, this would be where I stop typing and someone would say "go for it yolo" or "get help," but I really do not want to go down this road. It's not that I'm ashamed, its that I'm afraid of living out a future partner. My mother is at least a decade younger than my dad. I have seen what living out your partner does to a person. I do not want to become her. I know myself. I'm 100% positive I would kill myself without a second thought if it ever came to that.So here I am. Stuck in some weird sort of limbo. Hooking up isn't enough. I want a long term relationship with an older man, but I can't let myself. Besides the fact that I know I would make it unhealthy, what if it did last? It's very likely he would die a significant amount of time before me. Then what would I have? I'm not an ambitious person. The only thing I want out of life is love, I know I would not be able to handle death taking it away from me.I don't really know what kind of response I'm looking for right now. Just tell me something. Anything. Comforting words, advice, being able to relate, I don't know. Anything. I don't have anyone in real life that I'm comfortable with talking about this to.
I've been feeling lonely recently.
So I bought myself a new friend the other day!: http://ift.tt/210Uz0u's so cute!
Frustrating insecurities...
Hi! So I would like to share my difficulties with meeting other men in and I hope to find some advice. I’m a 23 year old guy who came out quiet late. Since I was never interested in girls, I never had a girlfriend. But I also never had a boyfriend or even a fling with someone. So I’m a 23 year old man with no experience whatsoever with kissing or having sex… But recently I’m trying to change this and honestly I have no difficulties at all with meeting guys. Quiet often a guy shows interest in me, but when I notice this I always back off since I’m afraid I’m going to be bad kisser or I’m going to be bad in bed… This is really frustrating and I feel that because of my insecurities I send mixed messages to the other guy, which makes it even more awkward. I really don’t know how to get over this phase. So my question is, if there are other people on here who can relate to my story and can tell me how they handle/handled this? Or just people who can give me some advice? Thanks in advance!
Could This Guy Be a Closet Gay?
Hey. I'm 19 years old and most likely bisexual. All I really know is I think, porn-wise, sex between a man and woman is hot, but lesbian and gay sex is way hotter. Wierd. Anyways, I had this peculiar situation happen to me last summer, the year I graduated high school. I started heavily smoking pot, and through other people who like to smoke pot, met this guy, we'll call him Jack. Now Jack used to go to my school, but ended up going to online schooling. I always thought he was really hot, was even pretty forward about it, and the responses were, as usual, vague and hard to piece together. For instance, one time as we were walking through the high school halls, Jack told me about how his girlfriend wouldn't blow him. I jokingly (but not really) told him that I would totally do it if she wouldn't. He suggested I tell his girlfriend that. Wierd. So, back to last summer, the "crew" would come to my place in the dead of night because my mom was at work and we all had weed. The two or three times Jack came through my door and actually hung out, we would always make eye contact, all the time. "Oh, better put on that rubber,' right? It get's better. We all stepped outside, smoking, and out of the blue, Jack asks me when my parents get home. I tell him that my mother won't return until we have to go to school. He replies with, "interesting." Followed by a long pause, and I respond, not knowing how to feel about it, "yeah." Wierd. Around the last couple of days we hung out, I was really trying to get into Jack's pants. Specifically, the last night we did spend together, I spent pretty much the whole night staring at him, kind of fucking with him, kind of trying to gauge the reaction. After about 10 seconds of eye contact, he turns away and squeals "queer." I just chuckle and pretend not to be slightly hurt. We all sat around in a circle in Jack's grandma's house, and I can't exactly remember how the conversation got to this, but it started with him saying he's not gay. Then he asked his friend next to him. He says he's straight as an arrow. He asks the next in the circle, and immediately I was dreading what I wanted to say. I wasn't about to lie about who I was, and I relaxed as I realized I was too high to care. So it got to me and I just kinda spoke, "I'm down for whatever, man." Everyone stopped what they were doing. One of the group interjected and said, "so you would fuck Jack's dog? You get off on that?" I replied, "naw, dude, that ain't me." We all laughed about it. But then jack said this: "So you're gay then?" I said, "Basically." He wanted to say something, I know it, because he went "I-" and as soon as everyone went silent to hear him, he froze, and then responded with "shit's fucked, bro." That got a couple of laughs. Wierd. I thought I had finally gotten my answer and offered him to come to my place after we all went home. Over text. No response. After the time I had alotted, I realized I had made a mistake and immediately apologized for being so blunt. No response. After a while, I found out from a friend that the situation "really grossed him out." I was also told from the same source that, when my friend had made a joke of him being gay, he got pissed off for the whole night. Wierd. Now, I like to think I have a lot of insight into people in general, but I cannot read this Jack character at all. What are you guyzez opinions? Any ideas on what the hell that shit was about? He also takes pride in being homophobic and is ashamed to have the same birthday as when gayarriage was legalized. Obviously, I'm no longer interested, haven't been for a while. But it was a question I was never really able to answer.
Is my husband gay?
I found out my husband has been watching gay porn and masturbates to it regularly since 13yo. I don't know what to do, what to think. He confessed he has found some men attractive but would never act on those impulses and he loves me and is totally attracted to me. He also confessed on doing something sexual with another boy when both were teens, which is something he feels deeply ashamed of (according to him). But I don't know exactly what was that. We've been married for 3 years,no kids and have great sex esporadically (1 per week aprox. Sometimes 2-3 weeks can go by but it's because I have low libido) I feel my world just crashed. I don't know if he's using me or not. He's been verbally and emotionally (3 times physically) abusive towards me but he's been better for the past 4 months. I'm the only one working because he took time off to do his master. I don't know what to do. Is he gay?
Dating advice (Gay)?
So I recently started talking to a guy. It's been a bit over a week, and his birthday is next Friday. He is a huge avatar the last airbender fan, so I decided to get him a water bender necklace for his birthday and buying him a cup cake from one of his favorite cupcake stores. Problem is, he is always busy since his major is demanding. I'm busy too, but I just don't want our busy schedules to eventually lead to the interest fading away. Any tips?
I'm Gay
Or at least I though so until a few weeks ago when I started finding guys sexually attractive for the first time in my life.So I guess I'm bi and not lez then.
If im going to hell then
Why the fuck do i keep crying because my best friend found out that im gay and im scared what he might think?Why do i even have feelings? Why do i cry cause my friends act differently around me now then before? If im going to hell cause i have different feelings then why shouldnt i do the most fked up shit ever without even blinking an eye? if someone of the homophobic club can give me an honest answer why i keep being nice then please speak
Whats the name of that website with awful selfies?
Does anyone remember this a few months ago, maybe a year or even a little more? There was this amazing website that highlighted the most terrible selfies imaginable. These were the types of selfies one might find on Craigslist, not Facebook, who's decency standards would have taken them down, if you know what I mean. What made these selfies so great was how the people in them were in some suggestive poses, but juxtaposed with being in some 80s style living room with grandmas wedding picture on the mantle, or perhaps taken in a bathroom mirror but the mirror also captures the nasty state of said bathroom.On top of that, there would be the most splendid descriptions of the scene, that interpreted the pictures, which were taken in complete seriousness by the subjects, as if the images were pulled from a home design magazine. "Notice how the lone dirty sock accentuates the bold choice in color palette..." etc.I was talking about it at work today and no one remembers.Please help me!
Question for gay men and women
Have you ever had sex with somebody of the opposite biological sex? How did it happen and how did it go? Apologies in advance if this question is too TMI for this sub.
"Stuff" going down in Boy Scout troops? Is this for real?
I was on a date the other day with a guy who was telling me about where he grew up, etc and he was talking about how he did the Boy Scouts all the way through and eventually "eagled" (or whatever the word is for reaching the highest rank). He also talked about how his troop had a lot of "stuff" going down that the leaders were oblivious to including the fact that him and at least two other boys had been messing around with each other on camping trips/outings for years where the other two eventually became exclusive, dated secretly in the later years, and become a couple through the end of high school.Is this for real? Do any of you have experience with this? I'm not looking for people to write any freaky experienceproject-style porno stories here or anything but like, does this stuff seriously go down? Is it prevalent? I admit that if it does, I feel like I missed out.
Safety gay dating, experiences
I've heard that there are always difficulties when making arrangements online. I myself have a few experiences. What about with your experience. A discussion is desired. Maybe this helps other guys.
Why is it so hard?
Why am I so afraid? Why can't I accept who I really am? Every day I think about just giving up and ending it. I have to lie to everyone that I know. I don't want to, but I keep doing it. I've lurked on reddit for years. I'm finally at a crossroads of sorts. It's so hard to connect to people and share my true feelings. I'm just so ready to give up, but I'm too afraid to do it. I don't know exactly what i'm trying to get out of this post. I just don't know what to do. My only other option is to live a silent life until I can't take it. That is what I'm afraid of. I don't want for it to be over, but it's all that I can think of.Day to day, that is all I can think of. Please, I just don't know what to do. I'm begging anyone.
2016. február 25., csütörtök
My mother caught me during sex, and it affected my life
Hi, first of all, I'd like to apologize if my English is not good enough to describe what happened, but I'll try my best.I'm 34 years old Chinese descent living in Indonesia. I realize I'm gay since I'm in junior high, and stayed in the closet all the time, mainly due to my family strong traditional value and situation of my country. Being in the closet is not really hard for me, since I'm straight-act, mostly a loner (a nerd to be precise), tough there are some frustating times when I need a person to be with.Mid last year, my mother caught me red handed while having sex. She walked into the room while I'm doing oral sex to my partner, which resulting a very awkward moment while my partner left my place, and few hours argument with her.While she's kind enough not to tell my father (he will absolutely kill me), I've been getting a really snide remarks here and there from her whenever she got upset about something even tough it's unrelated to me. She's also becoming more frontal on trying to fix a marriage to me.This morning, out of nowhere, she put another snide remarks which is extremely hurtful to me. She said basically I'm crazy to have sex with men and not even considering female at all.Don't get me wrong, I've tried doing intercourse with female, but I can't get erection no matter how I tried (beside watching gay porn while doing it or drugs). I don't want to marry and make the other person suffer because of my lack of interest. I love kids, I have fun raising my nephew and niece, so kids part is not exactly the biggest issue here. I was perfectly comfortable with my lifestyle, and doing quite steady in my business too. But since she started throwing snide remarks on me, I fell into a lot of stress, making my relationship with my boyfriend strained in the process (less sex), and huge effect in my business too. At some points, I've been weighing worse options to get away from it.I think, what I wanted to ask is some advice to make the situation bearable (so it won't affect my business as worse as now, I'm almost bankrupt out of worry) or how to solve it. I realize my mother view of homosexual won't change at all given the strict traditional value my family held.Thank you in advance
Did I cross a line here?
I've been seeing a guy I think is pretty special. We've been on 5-6 dates and when we hang out he usually ends up crashing at my place for the night. Last Sunday we hung out and we spent 24 hours together. We were texting the next day and he mentioned that he was Going to the gym and to possibly hang out with a guy that he knew wanted to sleep with him but said he wasn't interested in sleeping with.We aren't a couple or anything so I know it's not really my business but jealousy got the best of me and I asked him if he slept with the guy. He said he didn't and he didn't seem mad that I asked but I just feel like since then the dynamic of our relationship changed. We would text a lot back and forth but Its slowed down the last day or so. And I noticed his dating profile is reactivated and he was online today.We've had such a good time together and share so many interests that it seems crazy that I could have ruined things between us just by asking that question but just typing this out is making me panic a bit. Ive never been in this situation with a guy I actually cared about before and I don't know what I should do to try to salvage things. What should I do?
Help Me, I'm Coming out as Versatile
I have been with my boyfriend for 7 years. I have always topped. But i want to bottom and I don't know how to ask him. He has always bottomed and I have no idea how he is going to react if I ask him to top for me out of the blue. I don't want to risk jeopardizing our relationship.
What US city should a mid-20s single gay man move to?
I'm from Tulsa and have been pretty set on moving to Long Beach/Santa Monica/Pasadena at some point next year. I've read Long Beach in particular has a flourishing "suburban" gay community, which actually sounds pretty great. However, what other cities in the US would you recommend for a upwardly mobile single guy?
Need advice
Hi everyone, I'm going to be hanging out with a friend I know, and I plan on sleeping with him when we do. I'm excited but nervous because he's kind of large if you catch my drift. Just wondering if anyone has any tips on how to maybe make it a little more comfortable? PM me replies if you'd prefer to be more discreet haha
The Finns Party Youth launched an outrageous campaign that says: There are only two sexes, boy and girl!
Oh, Finland...Today the Finns Party Youth launched a campaign that says "there are only two genders", namely boys and girls. This is obviously and demonstrably false, so please write them and tell them your opinion on the matter. You can find their E-mails here:http://ift.tt/1oJlPoB is the promo image for the campaign, people with caps that label them "BOY" or "GIRL": http://ift.tt/1WKI8EI
Stretching for Anal [NSFW advice please]
Hi there anyways I'm pretty new to anal sex but I'm going to be getting fucked for the third time tonight in a few hours by this guy. I don't have the cash to spend on anything professional, so I was wondering what's a good household item I could use as a butt plug to loosen up for later tonight? Or if there isn't anything to use what else can I do to make tonight better? Thanks!
Should I come out?
Hello everyone! I'm not really a good writer but I'll try my best to tell you problem. I'm 16 years old gay guy. I've came out to few of my trustworthy girlfriends and they're very supportive about it. I'm not fully out yet because if my parents finds out about it, they might not like the news and react horribly. I've never really had a guy friend before probably because I get intimidated by them but I really wish I get one. My wish came true and met an amazing guy and we've known each other for a month now. He's very funny and our friendship gets better and better. I really want to tell him I'm gay because I want him to know the real me. The problem is that I'm not sure how he'll react. I don't want to ruin our friendship. I joke around about me being "gay" and his reacts are nice and jokes about it by saying that he finds me sexy (I know he's straight so I don't really like him like that). He's a comedian so I'm not sure if he'll react like that way (nicely) and if he's just joking around about being okay with it. I feel like if I tell him he will try and avoid since his religion doesn't really support gay rights and he would think that I like him or I'll fall for him. I don't know what to do and I've asked my girl friends about this and they're also not sure but one of my friend told me that he might have a very dramatic reaction. Thank you!
My college roommate might want to sleep with me
Okay. So I just moved in my dorm this spring semester and finically got placed with a roommate. He's super hot and I think he's hinting that he's gay or bi or something. Every night he will ONLY sleep in his boxers and make it a point to pull the covers off of him when he's sleeping; exposing those nice abs. Also, he feels comfortable stripping in front of me. I swear I thought I heard him moaning one night but idk. So what should I do? He seems really nice but he keeps sending small hints at me. I'm bi and wouldn't mind but maybe he's just comfortable in his own skin
2016. február 24., szerda
homosexuality is a huge problem in...
bottlenecks of humanity; also shrimp, pigs, and tatoos. western biblical fatwas seem... like good idea's today. what if morality was originally a way for more informed elders to direct the future of peoples. Live long and prosper.
WATCH: Charlotte City Council Votes 7-4 for LGBT Non-Discrimination Ordinance
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GvsPwQjvAlQ
Charlotte City Council Member Al Austin, Yes on LGBT Protections
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LxsiMyjjDI
Should I come out to him?
Hello everyone! I'm not really a good writer but I'll try my best to tell you my problem. I'm 16 years old gay guy. I've came out to few of my trustworthy girlfriends and they're very supportive about it. I'm not fully out yet because if my parents finds out about it, they might not like the news and react horribly. I've never really had a guy friend before probably because I get intimidated by them but I really wish I get one. My wish came true and met an amazing guy and we've known each other for a month now. He's very funny and our friendship gets better and better. I really want to tell him I'm gay because I want him to know the real me. The problem is that I'm not sure how he'll react. I don't want to ruin our friendship. I joke around about me being "gay" and his reacts are nice and jokes about it by saying that he finds me sexy (I know he's straight so I don't really like him like that). He's a comedian so I'm not sure if he'll react like that way (nicely) and if he's just joking around about being okay with it. I feel like if I tell him he will try and avoid since his religion doesn't really support gay rights and he would think that I like him or I'll fall for him. I don't know what to do and I've asked my girl friends about this and they're also not sure but one of my friend told me that he might have a very dramatic reaction. Thank you!
Help me find this site!
So I'm sitting in my creative writing class and I see that the kid next to me keeps checking a website on his laptop. It looked like he would get notifications in the title bar (Google Chrome), so it was a messenger or chat site. But a word caught my eye on it: Gay. It says "Gay SQWAD" I barely caught a glimpse at it, and after seeing it for another split second, I know that it has a logo of a blue speech bubble and a white hashtag inside. Let's just say that I go to a very conservative university, and that I'm still closeted. Not really interested sexually in this kid, but the curiosity is killing me! I was born without the standard gaydar, so help me out! Help me find out what site this is.
Do I cheat or not?
My partner and I have been together 15 years. Everything is great except that he no longer wants to have sex. It's been over 5 years and I don't want to split up, but I want a "buddy". Is that wrong?
All the men I like reject me. How to be accepted ...
I am writing this as a sort of last hope for good advice ..Since I realized I am gay, which was at a pretty young age (13, 14) I also starting to realize what type of men I like: older, masculine, not per se muscular, more athletic/slim build, masculine attitude, hairy, stubble etc. A type one of my friends describes as 'dads' 'wolfs' 'otters' .. Usually men between the age of 35-55. But getting them to like me is been one of the problems I have yet to conquer ..When I started to discover 'the scene' online around the age of 16, 17 I got rejection after rejection. I did not take this so seriously, I thought it was just my age. But now ten years later (27, turning 28) I still have the same problem: I get constantly rejected. Even laughed at for hitting on someone or flirting with him.Now in general I cannot complain about my looks I think, a lot of people say I am handsome, I have even been scouted for modeling jobs twice. But I do think I have one thing against me when it comes to appearance: I look pretty young, I have no body hair whatsoever, very little beard, and also no chiseled jawline. My build is good I think, I am 6’3 and in good shape (not muscular though). I have no feminine behaviour, not at all, I am very masculine in my way of acting/talking/voice. Not that there would be anything wrong with this btw, but I could see it as a point of dislike for the type of men I like.My experiences with men can be counted on one hand, and all of them were not that great. Usually with men that I did not even really like, but as the men I do really like, don’t seem to want me, the options are limited.I have to admit that most of my dating happens online, I am not really active in the gay scene, I sometimes to go some bars with a (few) friend(s), but that is about it. Although it does not make any big difference in the outcome, if I see a nice guy I like I usually get a 'no'.Last weekend I went with one of my best friends to this club where I knew there would be lot of men that I would describe as 'my type' but the whole thing ended up in a disaster where as usual I got ignored after rejected after laughed at. Out of frustration I got pretty drunk and almost ended up hitting this one dude in the face as he said he did not dated 'kids' but my friend (who is 5’8 and 3,5 years younger than me) could come home with him if he wanted.Now what do I need to do to get accepted among the older masculine guys I like? Do I need to grow some muscles to compensate my lack of 'hairiness' ? On the other hand, this feels wrong to me, I am actually pretty happy with who I am and what I look like. Why should I change to be accepted?But I am just clueless at the moment, and really thinking about stop trying to date, just focus on my own things as work/studies/friends/sports …I am clearly for some reason not accepted and I don’t see it changing in the future. Of course it does disappoint me in some way as everybody seeks a successful romantic life I assume.
I'm gay
I'm gay and I'm coming out of the closet today because I can't handle the truth anymore and I get harrased daily for this bullshit. People need to realize the effect that bullying has on a gay person. Seriously, fuck off
Boyfriend works everyday
I've been in this relationship for awhile and my boyfriend workdays 7 days a week. I never see him on the weekends cause he works at a place outside the city in a small town. During the week I only see him when he comes over around 5-6pm and he spends the night. I know he's trying to make time for me and make this work but in the end I feel like it's not enough.I kind of wish he didn't work weekends so we could wake up together and spend the day not just evening and nights. Am I being crazy?I don't want to tell him he has to quit his weekend job or anything like that. I just feel alone (relationship wise) my friend always wants to do double dates or invites up to parties but we can never go together cause I just end up alone.Has anyone been in a relationship with someone like this?
NSFW Probably an odd first post, not sure if this is the right place to post.
I know this is not a dating site or anything, I guess I just needed to get this off my chest; but I've been just been feeling a lot of weird emotions lately, & have repressed quite a bit growing up. Anyways I'm 25 & looking for something, not sure if it's mostly based around sex or if I do want something intimate, but I definitely would like something that starts off as a friendship. I have a very strong attraction to men with unique figures, wide hips or big butts but not transitioning/transgendered or anything like that, just people with that figure. & doesn't hurt if they can also sing as well, I'll admit that there also has to be something there besides the physical & there has to be something more to them than just that, but it's just something that really grabbed my weak spot ever since I was a kid, it was actually one of the main things that helped me first discover my orientation. It's weird sometimes because I know that I wouldn't be comfortable doing anal sex or even oral, even though to be honest I've never experienced either (yes I know some may find that strange at my age, but whatever) even though I haven't experienced I can get a sense that those are things I probably would not enjoy, but I could possibly be open to doing other things. I had an idea of where I wanted this post to go, & now I've sadly lost it. Anyways if anyone wants to comment or give advice & even private message (if that's allowed) feel free.
I'm interested to play this game with more than just one person
So you know the game, you're stuck on an island but you can only take three things with you? Well my friend and I play a different version it's, you can only take a guy and two things with you. So out of curiosity I thought what a better way to entertain the hours while I sit at the emergency room with said friend.So our question? If you were stuck on an island and could only take two things and a famous guy who and what would it be?
Serious Gay Underwear Fetish - Swap - Philippines
Hi there. Hoping someone would be able to read this. Just want to get to know or meet people with the same fetish like mine.Would love to swap cum filled underwear. I'm from Manila, Philippines. Hoping to hear from anyone with the same interest. :)
2016. február 23., kedd
I don't wanna taco bout it
Obvious throw away is obvious, I'll try to be short (that won't happen) since I don't see looking back on this. Just wanted to share a story and give myself a little sanity.Queue roughly a year ago, met an awesome person we will call Taco. Taco told me he was straight, I found out later after a bit of beer and a lot of patience that Taco is gay. We were cuddling one night (after like two or three nights in a row) and he held my hand. Asked if he was awake and he said yea. He was in the closet still. We had a long conversation about what was going through our mind. We decided that a relationship wasn't the best idea because we're both in school and have bigger things to focus on. We settled on cuddle buddies.Queue a week later, I'm going crazy about the kid (crushing hard in class) and we eventually start going out. It was probably the best thing that's ever happened to me. I learned through the relationship that I wasn't bi and that I had never felt true love for a woman like I had for this guy. Only problem was I am super outgoing and he is super introverted. I couldn't stand peeling away from him whenever we heard someone even get near the door, so I had him at minimum come out to my roommates. This start a very bad chain where I was coming out for him, just because I wanted to share the joy that we had.About 6 month in the honeymoon phase was over. It was no longer 'this person is perfect', but it was still 'this person is worth every part of the good and bad' and there were no questions about it. He didn't seem to feel the same way. We moved in together with 3 other people (8 months into relationship, and all roommates knew we were going out) and then a month into a year lease he broke up with me. I honestly think what it comes down to is timing. The main reason for the breakup was because he 'wasn't ready for a relationship'. He doesn't exactly have an accepting family left (dads a bit homophobic and mom is no longer here).I was crushed an insane amount. Depressed since it was my first real heartbreak. I had to learn to hate him in order to live with him. Everything he did had to make me feel angry or I could not justify seeing him. Every time I saw him walk down the hall it was like breaking up all over again. I relived hell every day for 2 months before I got over him. Eventually I realized I was just forcing myself to be upset when I didn't need to be.The problem I'm at now is different. We are friends again, actual friends. We actually enjoy each others company and we're not just ACTING civil like we were before. I no longer emotionally hurt because of what happened between us. I realized all the reason I found to hate him were just silly. After dating a few other guys I realized my expectations for a relationship (which caused friction with Taco) were a bit extreme. One of the expectations was a 'no secrets' thing. Secrets meaning literally EVERYTHING should be communicated.So now I have this whole perspective shift that has happened (and is still happening) and I'm starting to develop the feels again. I'm honestly fine waiting until he is ready. The only thing that goes through my mind is "What if that was just an excuse?". I know he actually wasn't ready, and I've never seen him interact with any other guys at all. The question that kills me is 'Should I wait?'I'm perfectly fine taking this time to better myself as a person and I don't see the need to really LOOK for a relationship. The only reason this festered again is because I had an anxiety attack today over school/Taco/family/stressors and I really needed someone to be there and was hoping it was him. I ended up wrapping myself in a blanket burrito and slept for a couple hours. Forgot I had the attack until just now. I have only had one other attack in my life like this.This is probably WAY too much detail, but live life and do what you do right?But still, should I be waiting for a person if I care this much about them? When is it not okay?
Idk what to do and how to find someone
Hi all I'm on mobile so sorry if there is bad formatting.I would like to start off by saying I am bisexual and am a 20 yr old male. I have posted here how I find women attractive but don't want a relationship with one, only with a guy, and apparently I'm not the only one which was nice to know.I'm out to three of my friends and my bro. They are all cool with it and don't mind. One of them is my best friend, and guess what, I fell in love with him and have been for about 2 1/2 yrs. idk why or how, I was never attracted to him like that before, but after he helped me out when I was going through a rough time, I fell for him. He kinda led me on, I thought he liked me so I liked him back. I told him I was bi, he said he didn't know what he was, and decided he was straight. This all happened in October of 2014. I told him how I felt this past January on like the 3rd, after holding it in for so long, despite the fact I knew he was straight, just to get it off my chest and I took ur guys' advice. He was totally fine with it and we still are best friends, we ALWAYS hang out, all the time, and even tried to line our college classes up so he could hang out after or during class. We got one class together and it's cool. We always make gay jokes and I joke I wanna do things with him and end it with no homo and he just laughs at it, so I know this doesn't bother him at all.Here is the thing that really bothers me. It hurts a lot, I like him so much and he doesn't feel the same and we hang out a lot, it's like he is so close but far away at the same time idk how to put it in words. Every time we hang out It crushes me to know we can't be more. I would like to think I would get over him, I told him I would, but it seems like I can't. I have seen advice where they say to cut the person off, to forget about them, but I can't do that, he is my best friend, I seriously see us being lifelong friends. But then again it hurts me a lot at the same time when we hang out, don't get me wrong I like being around him, he's funny, he may not be the best looking but to me he is. Idk how to put what I'm feeling into words, I love my best friend, he doesn't feel the same, I still like him a lot and it hurts and I want it to stop. What do I do? I feel like I need to find someone else, maybe try to distance myself from him? That would hurt him too if I did that. He said he misses me, cuz we don't hang as much (we just came back from a trip last month where we were together with other friends for a week as well) he misses me as a friend I'm assuming. He was a little drunk I was pretty much gone lol, but he kept saying he misses me. He says I'm funny sometimes, he says loves me no homo(lol), etc. I feel like he likes me but is too scared to admit it but that's just me hoping for the best(sigh). I don't want to cut off all ties with him either. Should I just wait for this to pass? I doubt it will, I will always like him, even if there is someone else out there. I'm at a loss for what to do because either choice I make, whether to remain his best friend or to distance myself from him both hurt. I want to stay friends, what do u guys think? For the record neither of us has been in a relationship either, and I'm dreading the day he finds someone, cuz that really would suck, but I don't want to hold him back. Uggghhhh what do I do?!!?!!!?Thanks!
Anal Sex
I don't know whether this has been discussed here, but how many of you don't like anal sex?I personally do not like or enjoy anal sex, and when I admit it to the person I'm seeing/dating they're kind of taken aback.Is this common or uncommon?? I really enjoying giving oral and masturbation.Am I the weird one?
Any advice on which LGBT celebs to follow on snapchat
Just got on snapchat and can't think of many gay celebrities to follow on snapchat.
The Battle
Story Time:I've been in the process of figuring out how to propose to my boyfriend, like all the details, how, when, where, what exactly I'll say, who (if anyone) will be there? Finally, I think (and hope) I have everything planned how I want it to go, so it's time to tell the other important people in my life:Mom, Dad, Step-Mom. It's a beautiful terrible moment when they all have different reactions and here they are in the order I told them.Mom, 2/2/2016 7:25 PM... Mom:"Zach, is everything okay?" Zach:"Yeah, I'm going to propose to Michael!" Mom:"Why? Are you sure?"And that's where this story will end because this is where the pain began. My mom and I have ALWAYS been close, but July 4, 2015 I confirmed her suspicion that I was gay and we started to separate. She's never been supportive of my relationship, but she's also never been so... I don't know a word? Rude, callous, disdainful, unhappy? And I'd never been so hurt. Mom is "worried" about me because of what the Bible says about being gay. I was hurt because not once in our conversation did she say congratulations, she didn't say I'm happy for you; the most positive thing she said was "Well, I guess you're happy." Thanks for the statement, Mom. 0/1 parents in support and a car ride of ugly crying.Step-Mom, 2/2/2016 10:47 PM... Zach:"I have something to tell you..." StepM:"Oh no, are you okay? Is Michael okay?" Zach:"I'm going to propose." StepM:"What? That's exciting! When?" Zach:"Date"We talked for probably close to an hour; it was great. She was VERY adamant that we not have kids immediately and enjoy being married first. I support that decision. Compared to my mom, it was a vastly different conversation! I could feel her hesitation, but she's always supported my relationship with Michael. When I "came out" (she already knew) she said, "I don't care who you date as long as they treat you right." And so here we are, a planned proposal and 1/2 parents that I know will be at the wedding.Dad, 2/3/2016 7:26 AM... Dad:"Alright, son, I'm heading out. Love you, when am I seeing you again?" Zach:"Oh! Dad wait, I have to tell you something!" Dad:"Oh, Lord..." Zach:"I'm going to propose to Michael Date!" Dad:"... Congratulations son!"Not going to lie, this is the proudest moment I've ever shared with my dad. He and I have always had a rough relationship, I've been preparing to lose him as someone in my life since I was 11 because he cheated on my mom, future step-mom, and current "step-mom" (StepM isn't my Step Mom any longer). But, I always forgave him because I loved him and I didn't want to lose him. It was this moment that I realized he's the parent that's going to stick with me forever; I've been preparing to lose the wrong person for half of my life. It was a wonderful feeling when he said "congratulations" I immediately cried and hugged him. I let out a blubbering "Thank you" and proceeded to Kim K cry and he made things better by saying, "You don't have to thank me, I'm your father."So now I'm at 2/3 parents, a lot of joy, and a proposal to perfect.Moral of the story: Don't let anyone dictate who you love or how you love them. If someone is meant to be in your life, they'll find a way to stay there and if they're not, prepare for the goodbye.UPDATE: He said yes! We got engaged 2/11/15 and it is the best moment of my life up to that point!
Came out to my mom!!!
I've been wanting to do it for a while and I finally did it the other day! I'm going through my first heartbreak and she knew I was upset and I just decided to tell her about it. She has been really great about it, she hasn't pried or asked too many questions like I expected she would. It was obvious that she pretty much knew that I'm gay because she barely reacted and even suspected I liked the boy who I'm currently trying to get over. She's helping me get through it and I'm really glad I finally got the courage to tell her!
I'm a 23 year old college student, and I finally accepted that I'm gay.
For a long time, I tried to convince myself that I was straight. Than I tried to convince myself that I was bisexual. Finally I admitted to myself that I'm either gay, or bisexual with a heavy preference for men. I still find women mildly attractive, but not nearly as attractive as I find men. I spent so many years overcompensating. Now that I've accepted myself, I'm finally happy.EDIT: I'm a guy.
what do i do?..
soooo.... im gay and 18 years old. my two closest friends hate eachother..there both bisexual ones 16 and the other is 18. the 18 year old hard core flirts with me at school like hugging and kissing and sex jokes and i like the attention tbh but everytime it happens around my other closest friend i feel like he hates me for doing it abd letting it happen... should i confront the 16 year old about it or just leave it..
2016. február 22., hétfő
Please help me out, honest question, not trying to troll or be stupid :/
Hey guys going to my first gay bathhouse (steam works Berkeley). I'm finally old enough and tho I don't classify as gay I am a bit bicurious. I am a voyuer and was wondering if bathhouses would be appropriate setting for watching specifically this one in Berkeley. My main concern was can I get an std or any disease by coming to a bathhouse. I won't have unprotected sex, I won't have sex at all even, just use the sauna hot tub, walk around looking to jerk off while watching. I'm sorry if this is a dumb question just don't know and thought you guys could help, thank you!
What are we???
So I'm 18 and I was at a new years party with my friends. I got drunk and so did everyone else. I'm still in the closet to everyone except my best friend . so I was drunk and so was this other guy.( call him O) . so I went to sleep on the same bed as O but I ended up hugging him.He wasn't asleep and ended up hugging back. I was interested and I just hugged his waist and brought him closer and stated rubbing . I didnt know what I was going but he ended up kissing ME. after that I rubbed his stuff and we kinda went well to third base and even as close as almost putting in the tip. I stopped myself cause I knew I was really drunk and if I started I wouldn't want to stop.I remember telling O to message me if he still remembers the night. And to my surprise he messaged me and started talking about how he liked it and everything . I liked it too. So we get to talking and we say we want to finish what we started . we agreed on a place and a time and all the stuff we'd use (lube and condom) . we even sent exposed photos of ourselves. for some reason we never went through with it . we just stopped messaging about it .I saw him not to long ago at another sleep over nonetheless.It was weird . he kinda kept his distance yet I knew he wanted to talk to me. He kept looking at me when he thought I wouldn't notice (I would look at his reflection from other things) .by the time we all left the next day it was completely normal we were talking by our selves laughed at the same time at the same thing and it was cool.Now I really REALLY want to do him in the ass and have him in me . but I feel like we can't go back to any of it. I might actually even have a small crush on him.Now for the most complicated part. I can't talk to anyone about this not even my best friend because the guy I want used to have a small thing with her.Please give me some advice!!!
I've been in love with someone for 4 years and they don't even know.
So I have a problem, I've known my best friend for 5 years. At first I just liked him as a friend nothing more nothing less but over the years of knowing him I've become really affectionate towards him, I know it sounds like some creepy stalker from the movies but I've always been there in his time of need and although he's had other boyfriends they've all treated him the same, cheated on him, lied to him, used him etc.Every single time he's broken up with someone he's come to me for support and I've always given it to him. He's probably one of the most kindest friends I know, he's always put his partner first he always looks after them he's loyal, honestly he's the perfect partner for anyone, but whenever he is with someone they use him because of it.I first started liking him more and more probably about a year into the friendship, we can make each other laugh, we insult each other as a joke something chronic and neither of us take offence to it, we are there for each other no matter the difficulty talking about the situation, we're open to each other and we've both gone through the same issues. The only thing that's stopped me from telling him how I feel is that he's not attracted to me in the slightest. I'll give you an example, one time we were on a chat client called TeamSpeak some of you may know what this is and some may not, for those who don't, TeamSpeak is a voice chat client for gaming. Anyway one of our mutual friends was in the channel and we cracked a joke about him and he responded jokingly "go fuck each other" something along those lines and he said "ew, no thanks" any time I've slightly hinted and I mean slightly hinted I like him but not enough for him to ask if I like him, he responds with something that states he doesn't find me attractive and he wouldn't go near me with a ten foot pole.I'm not the ugliest man in the change room but I'm not the hottest either I would say I'm halfway but to him I seem to be the ugliest person on earth, from what I can only assume. How I can be in love with someone who doesn't even know I am? I mean 4 years is a long time, over the years I've smoothed the path for him secretly, from a distance, I set up an account for him so when he wants to buy a house he has enough to pay a deposit, I've also been putting money aside for him to get his dream car which is a Mini Cooper all of these will be sent to him anonymously, I don't want to do these anonymously anymore I want him to know who's been looking after him all these years but I don't want to freak him out and destroy a perfectly healthy friendship I'm like what Elizabeth Keen is to Raymond Reddington except I'm Reddington only invisible. What in the shit am I meant to do?
Falling in love with a closeted christian guy
I think that I am falling in love with someone. I don´t know if this someone is gay, but I´m pretty sure of it. My problem is that he is a christian. There is nothing wrong with that, however I personally am an atheist. Both of us are very similar, we kind of have the same humor, and we share a lot of interest. Even if I think he is gay, I don´t know for sure. Considering his faith, which is kind of conservative lutheran-ish, I´m not sure if he even would want a relationship. I really think he is an awesome person, and I feel he feels the same way about me. How do I tackle this situation? Do any of you guys have similar experiences?
My friend always go for the guys I set an eye to
I started to suspect a while ago, the friend I hang out the most always try and flirt with the people I go for , last night I confirmed my theory and yes he went to the guy I randomly picked , how should I take this? I'm confused because I don't know if I should consider him a friend or hang out with different people , I'm not jealous it's just I feel he does it to hurt me
A little question
I think my best friend, which is gay, has a crush on me. He calls me cute and says I'm adorable and last week, he gave me a piece of paper on which he had drawn something (is is very good at drawing). When I opened it, it was a drawing of me, naked, laying on my side and my crotch was visible.I'm not sure, because I've never had a boyfriend before, but is this drawing a hint? He seemed pretty serious about it when I opened it, but I don't wanna jump to conclusions or sound narcissistic. I'm gay myself, but I have no romantic feelings for my best friend. I care about him, but I feel like having a romantic relationship with him is like having a romantic relationship with my brother.(P.S. Sorry for the English, is not my first language)
2016. február 21., vasárnap
Feel like im all over the scale, anyone relate/help?
Az összesítés nem áll rendelkezésre. A bejegyzés megtekintéséhez
kattints ide.
Am I overthinking the situation?
Last Monday, I got a message from this attractive 34 year old (I’m 25) on grindr. It’s not every day when a guy I find attractive messages me first- its usually me who starts the conversation. I replied, and from there we get talking and it turns out this guy is actually incredibly sweet, interesting, and we actually had a lot in common, including our love for dogs (he has four!). We exchanged phone numbers and after some back and forth we decided to go to lunch. We ended up having a really good time. I usually struggle to speak to people because I don't know what to talk about and I assumed I'd only be hanging out with him for a ‘short lunch’ as I told him on text. Turns out, we actually spent an hour and a half sitting there talking to each other; I didn't want it to end but I had to head back to work. We shook hands and agreed that we should do it again sometime. Less than 20 minutes later, he texted me. We exchanged a couple flirty messages and got to talking about our next hang out.I told him that I would be in his area because of a friends birthday the next day, and he suggested we hang out after my friends festivities. About an hour before we were to meet up, he said that he couldn’t think of anything to do and asked if playing board games, drinking wine, and playing with dogs at his place was ok. I said sure; I wanted to spend more time with him. So I end up going back to his place; we drink wine, play with his dogs, talked about everything (we even talked about travelling places together, and signed up for a couple events in a couple months, to which he commented ‘what if we’re not talking in a couple months). He was incredibly sweet, and after a few accidental nudges on each others arms/legs, we end up on his bed, cuddling, having sex, and falling asleep.I ended up staying the night, and the next morning we had sex again. He made a comment about how after first meeting me, he didn’t think I would be down for sex. He also made a comment about how we were from two generations and confessed he was 38, not 34. I know four years isn’t much of a difference, but for some reason it bothered me because he didn’t act or look 38 at all. I had to leave at 10am to be somewhere at 11am, and I kissed him goodbye and said we should get lunch during the week again, to which he agreed. Fast forward to a week later. We’ve barely talked. He is a lawyer and he told me that this week was really crazy for him. I find myself myself going on grindr to stalk his whereabouts and there was a period where he wasn’t online for two days straight. After not hearing from him for two days, he finally messaged me saying ‘sorry for not getting back to me, lunch next Tuesday?’ to which I agreed. Anyway, I don't even think my story has a point. I just wanted people to see it. Well, maybe it does have a point. My whole life, I've been way too scared to do meet up with anyone, and I feel like I actually have a connection with someone but am afraid that I am losing my opportunity to spend time with someone who I actually like. Thinking back, I wouldn't have slept with him, and I would have not let myself be so freaked out about our age difference.Am I overthinking the situation? Is he no longer interested in me? Its crazy how a simple text form him can put such a smile on my face.
Sex slave?
Im a 15 yo furry femboy and my life is prety much over so im looking for a master to take me and let me please him <3
What makes a family a great family?
I can't understand why something that should be obvious or close to us it is so easy to contort, to make some political and religious reasoning. Is there a not personal or subjective though that express authority? I would love if you share your own opinions or some important research/document that define what is for you a family, and maybe also a better family. Thanks
To the two friends of mine who heard I was going on my first date soon: thank you.
I know this is kind of a silly post, but I thought that this would be an enjoyable story and a good example to other people out there. Recently I went on a trip to the mall with two great friends of mine, who are a couple. Going into this trip, I wanted to get out and shop for fun, but I was also hoping to pick up some things for a date that I have coming up with a guy who I've been talking to for a while. I hadn't come out to these friends yet, but I was hoping they'd be cool with it. Anyways, we had gone to a bunch of stores, and the guy friend asked me if there was anywhere else I needed to go. Nervously, I explained that I was thinking of picking up some things for a date soon, but that it was a little embarrassing and I didn't want them to have to go through that with me. Without missing a beat, both him and the other friend (his girlfriend) eagerly asked me what I was looking for and congratulated me. As we walked to the first store, I casually mentioned the fact that it was a guy I was going on a date with. Both of them didn't skip a beat, not even commenting on it. They even helped me pick out stuff I never thought my friends would be willing to do like boxer briefs and condoms (because hey, you never know), and were constantly encouraging me to not worry about it and to be excited.This story is a little silly, but I never thought I would have friends who are so willing to help me out with things like this. I hope that others out there will be just as willing to make things like a first date seem a lot less scary and be so helpful.
How can I find a serious relationship?
I am gay, and I am not entirely out. Everyone I'm close with knows, but it is not "common knowledge" among everyone who knows me that I am gay.Basically, I'm to the point where I have decided that I want a serious relationship. I went through all the normal steps of a curious gay guy who wants to put himself out there (e.g. download Grindr and Tinder, etc.).On every app I try, all I find is people who want NSA sex or maybe an FWB. I want neither of those things. I want a loving, monogamous relationship. Someone I can be entirely myself with. A best friend. Someone to complete me emotionally, not just sexually.I live in a small, rural town. Almost no one is open about their sexuality, which I feel contributes to the fact that everyone is so hookup-oriented. Also, as you can imagine, the options are limited. I am definitely gay, but I am not easily attracted to anyone at all. I've only ever truly crushed on like 5 guys in my lifetime.My fear is that I'll never find someone I like who also is gay and likes me back. I really want to find someone, but nothing I try brings any luck. What other methods are there for meeting people who might be more relationship-oriented?TL;DR: Need to find a real relationship, not just hookups. Grindr and Tinder have failed me. What else do you suggest?
Could this person have gotten in trouble?
OK, so over 6 months ago, I spoke with this guy on grindr who told me that there were a lot of bad people on grindr but he was not one of them, but did send me inappropriate pictures but I was somehow leaded on so we texted each other and decided on the possibility of meeting up. I felt strange like something could be wrong, so I looked up the number and found a link to a website saying the guy had been arrested and charged with raping a 20 year old man. At only 18, I was really scared and additionally it said he was 50, while he had told me on grindr that he was 40. While I'm not going to even further bother with this situation and it happened such a long time ago, could this person have gotten into trouble? What he did was be manipulative and he potentially had tried to get me into a dangerous situation. I just cut off all contact and never used grindr ever again, and decided to always show up when meeting someone online with a friend and never to go beyond a 18-23 age limit when dating.
Have a crush on this guy who works at a restaurant. I don't know how to approach him.
So I have known of this guy for about 9 months now. His name is Curtis. He works as a host at a breakfast restaurant right next to my university. From the first time I saw him I thought he was pretty cute. Ever since I have been going to the same place almost every weekend trying to work up the courage to ask him out. The main problem is, of course, that I don't know whether he is gay or not. He seems gay to me, but I don't want to make generalizations, and honestly I'm not sure if I'm just being hopeful.I don't really know the guy, but I want to get to know him. I don't want to straight up ask him out, because I don't want to put him in an awkward position while he's working, and I also don't want to get rejected lolI was thinking about asking him to hang out, and be like "Oh hey, you seem like a pretty cool guy, would you want to grab a drink sometime?" Would that be too weird?It has gotten to the point where this crush has affected other potential relationships I might have. Every single time I start dating some other guy, the first thing that comes to my mind is that I won't be able to keep pursuing Curtis, and then every time I am not seeing anyone I go right back to trying to approach him.Anyway, does anyone have any advice? I could really use some help.
I went on my first date in a long time.
I was in a long relationship about 2 years ago and it ended and i was emotionally destroyed. I gave myself some time and i decided to get back out there :D. Unfortunately i only got used, although everything was going so well. He just started ignoring me for days now. I'm assuming he just stopped being interested. I just feel ugly and used now. After having a great time and talking for days. Just nothing. So I'm probably not gonna date anymore any time soon. I wish you all the best of luck and have a good day :D.
2016. február 20., szombat
The gay lifestyle is like a endless party, but one day you get too old to party
That's depressing, ins't it?
I have a crush on a presumedly straight boy and I don't know how to deal with it (gay)
So I'm in an improvisation team at my high school and one of the guys is really attractive and sweet and intelligent. But, I'm pretty sure he's straight or closeted (he dresses really well which is a huge contrast to the people at my school... stereotypes sorry). I don't know if I should tell him or just deal with it but ughh he's perfect. He does look at me often and when we talk he looks deep in my eyes and sometimes gets a bit awkward (so do I). Lately he started to purposely try to annoy me but I don't know if this means anything. Thoughts?
The Institute for Advanced Homophobia?
So I was browsing the Internet and came across this group called The Institute for Advanced Homophobia. They dedicate themselves to cataloging virtually every article of news involving homosexuality and highlighting what they believe to be "the worst excesses" of homosexuality and proposing pseudo-psychological theories for our existence and what they consider the pathologies of our lifestyles.Every homophobe I've encountered has been some variant of religious nut who only knows how to cite scripture, weird Darwinian fundamentalist, or obnoxious fourteen year-old (at least mentally) looking to provoke a reaction. The thing is that these guys are different. Despite being the most hateful and callous bigots I've ever encountered, they're intelligent, articulate, and funny. And they also have mountains upon mountains of evidence to backup everything they say.I'm seriously worried about what this group could do if they became more widespread.p.s. here's a link to their official emblem
A little confused
I think I might be bi. Is it normal to be more choosey with one sex over the other? I kinda feel that way and I'm not sure if that makes me bi. I know that this is an awkward question and I feel awkward for asking it. I just feel kinda confused. Admittedly these are feelings that I've tried to not pay attention to but sooner or later they seem to come back for some reason. I feel like I could just have sex with a girl but want more when it comes to guys, something deeper and more intimate. Any thoughts would be appreciated. Thanks.
The link between digit ratio and sexual orientation
So I had often heard that straight males/gay females are much more likely to have a longer ring finger than index finger, while gay males/ straight females are much more likely to have a longer index finger than ring finger.I'm gay, and dude, and I've always noticed that my index finger is longer than my ring finger. So I decided to put this two the test.I measured at least 42 friends' digit rations, my best friend who is a lesbian has the expected longer ring finger. The one openly gay male I know, like me, had a longer index finger. And out of the 40 other males and females who's ratios I measured, all conformed to the expected ratio except for one (Maybe he's gay :/ )So is this just a fluke? Is there any real science here?I'm finding this really interesting, so what gender and orientation are you, and which finger of yours is longer?
Cheesy Plea For Advice
I figure at this stage of my life (mid-30s already?), I should be beyond pleading for relationship advice on the internet, but I find myself really confused by some current events, and I need a fresh perspective.Background: I've known a guy for a few years, we met online, then in person and hit it off. He broke it off shortly after. We elected to stay friends and that was fine for a year or so, then we somehow became romantically involved yet again. That lasted about a week. We stayed friends. Flash forward to a few weeks ago when, like a frigging idiot, I became involved with him a third time. He dumped me last night.He's been texting me all day, even going as far as asking if we should hang out tonight. I've strongly refused.He's a good guy, and even as "just friends" I really enjoy the time I spend with him, and he's said he enjoys time with me. He does seem to have lots of emotional problems however. I can't get him to open up and I strongly believe he pushes people away when they get too close. I suspect something terrible happened in his past to make him like this, but without ever talking about personal issues, how am I to know for sure? I can't tell you how many times I've told him I'm here and want to listen.I made it clear to him after he dumped me that this is the last time we'll ever be romantically involved ever again. Three strikes and he's out. I'm angry, sad, and confused. Mostly angry at myself, sad that he's pushing me away again, and confused as to why he continuously pursues me.So I guess I'm reaching out to you nice strangers to be blunt and tell me what the hell I'm doing with my life. Or I'm just looking for a platform from which to vent, I don't know. I'm rather confused. I tell myself I won't give him another chance, but I don't think it's sunk in with him yet, and the way he's been texting, it seems like he hasn't accepted it's over yet. My brain tells me to kick this asshole to the curb and be done with it, but my heart, my goddamn fool of a heart, won't let me. Am I being an idiot/being pushed away/being screwed around with/being irrational/being normal? I don't know. This is where you come in.
Religion and Homosexuality
Everything I mentioned below is according to the Chinese novel "Journey to the west" (written in the 16th century, it's like the chinese version of the bible)First of all, there are two worlds, one that we live in, and one that gods live in. Gods have very long but finite life time(500 years), but they were seen as immortals because at the end of their lifetime they could eat a special type of fruit to extend their life time, and they could do this indefinitely.However, the production rate of those fruits are limited, and the demand is high, so Gods experimented with other ways to extend their life. Surprising, they discovered that eating little boys and girls could extend their life.Heterosexual relationship between Gods are strictly forbidden in the heaven. Since the Gods don't really die, if they reproduce, the population of the heaven will go out of control. However they are allowed to go to earth and do whatever they want.On the other hand, homosexual relationship and abortion on earth is forbidden. Remember, not all God could obtain the special fruit to survive, most of the God have to rely on children to extend their lifetime (note: remember god wanted Abraham to sacrifice his son? he aint kiddin)The monkey king, on his journey, noticed an creature collecting young boys and girls every year to eat from local villages. He became mad and fought the creature. But a well known God saved the creature and told the monkey king that it was her pet. Eventually monkey king realized what was going on and did not bother with those kinds of stuff again.So there you go, 100% accurate description from the inspiring book "journey to the west"
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