Advice from someone experienced

First of all I've never made a post on Reddit or even tried to write about my feelings online so I apologize if I miss word something or anything of that sort. I also suck at spelling so sorry if that's annoying.I'll try and describe a bit about myself and my situation to maybe make advice more easier. I'm 14 years old and completely closeted. I'm about two weeks into my year of school and I'm a freshman (Or in 9th grade). I'm not feminine at all and don't hang out with any girls only guys. There is not a single person in my entire grade (about 400 kids) that has come out as gay or bi anything like that besides a few pan girls. I want to come out as gay to my school really bad but am extremely terrified and it stresses me out incredibly.I constantly ask myself why am I gay because I feel it makes my life a lot more difficult then it could be if I was straight. The closest to coming out I ever came was when I was talking to a close guy friend and I told him that I didn't have any attraction to any celebrity or people from my school at all. He proceeded to ask if I was gay and I looked away and didn't say anything. After a few seconds of silence he asked if I had any attraction to guys and that he was cool with it. I then said "Maybe... I really don't like talking about it." and changed the subject. The next day when I saw him we were with a few friends and he made a ton of jokes to me and a few friends and using the term "faggot" and telling a few of my friends to join the Gay Straight Alliance (A group in my school).I've been thinking about that day for about a week now and get sick to my stomach that I didn't truly tell him I was gay so he could spread it around the school and end this nightmare. I'm not sure if I should go back to him and tell him the truth or just stay silent for longer. My hands are shaking as I write this and overall I just want all this stress to be gone. Thank you for reading this and any advice if your going through something similar or have gone through coming out would help me so much.