Is it worth it?

I moved away from home to go to college over a month ago, but I have yet to make any friends. In this time, I've been having conflicting thoughts about losing my virginity. Part of me wants to find a guy, make sure he's clean, and hook up with him. But then the other part of me still wants to wait until I find someone I actually like so that giving my virginity away has some sort of meaning. I feel I just want to hook up with someone because I'm lonely, not because I genuinely feel like I'm ready or it's time to lose my "v card". I suffer from depression pretty bad anxiety, which is why I haven't been very social. I'm also still hiding in the closet from everybody, and I'm terrified to come out for even though I know I'll be perfectly fine at college. I guess there is some unconscious fear of my family and other people from back home finding out. My friends would probably celebrate it, but in my current situation of life it would be a disaster if any adults, including my parents, were to find out. I am just wondering if any of you guys think is it worth giving away my virginity to a random stranger in my current mental state, or if there are other ways to platonically explore my sexuality? Because in the end, I don't believe I'm ready yet.