Help plz-creative bedroom solutions

I feel like this is a cliched topic. I'm a gay man (23) dating my boyfriend (22). We've been together since October.I'm a versatile bottom (switch) and he's a top (switch). We've both had a good deal of experience sexually and have some awesome chemistry. If we have anal, I bottom, which I do enjoy quite a bit. My bf was open to bottoming for me out of fairness but after a couple tries (with quite a bit of foreplay to help him loosen up), we ignored it for a little while. I also have an issue of maintaining an erection due to the pressure.Recently my bf told me that he has had 1 experience bottoming that he found enjoyable. The other experiences (about 8) were all painful to him. 1 in particular was very painful as the person was rough with little regard for him.Last night we chatted about our sexual life and he asked me what my thoughts would be if I never got to top him. I told him it's his body and his decision but I would be interested in topping. I said that we could think of creative solutions (maybe a flashlight?).He voiced his concerns and fears of being a greedy top/total top--in the past I had said I don't always mesh super well sexually with total tops--that was when he had expressed being open to bottoming for me. Given the change of status for him (and his feelings of me expecting him to bottom sometimes), I reassured him.Since the beginning of our sexual relationship, my bf has been very conscientious about bottoming and has remained open minded about other activities, such as me rimming him (which I really, really enjoy). I've contemplated whether I enjoy rimming so much that I would be open to never topping him.On a final note, my bf brought up the theoretical idea of a threesome in the (distant?) future. My first reaction was a hard no. I'm not sure I could handle it personally. I'm already working on my issues with jealousy/insecurities. My mind views it as a form of cheating even though I consciously know that many successful couples bring a third party into the mix. I view it as a threat/breach of trust. Just thinking of it brings up feelings of inadequacy. That all being said, I don't feel completely closed off to the idea however in my experiences, I've not heard of many relationships opening up that way that managed to stay together. It could be a way to meet my topping desires.Currently both my bf and I agree that we don't want to have a threesome with anyone. If we did, I was thinking about boundaries that I'd be interested in discussing--such as safe only, no kissing, and maybe just inviting a bottom or versatile role into the bedroom-- just to name a couple potentials. Either way, I still feel like I'd feel inadequate in the long run.I guess im writing this post looking for advice. What are some creative solutions for when I really want to top but can't?