My first love: Just an experiment?

I'll start off by saying that I have not done this before [turned to the internet for help] but I need answers. I am a 20-year-old, recently 'out' gay guy who fell in love with an 18-year-old closeted guy. yawns-closes page For those of you who are still reading, the relationship started as a sort of friendship at University, I was what we call in the UK, a ‘Fresher Helper’ and he (let’s just call him…Howard) was a ‘Fresher’. My job was to help freshers move into their new halls (dorm) and help them settle in to life at university, which is exactly what I did for Howard. A few weeks passed and we were just friends, that would occasionally see each other, like I did with the hundreds of new people I also helped during the first few weeks. Howard was different though, he latched onto me in a way that others didn’t, he would always make sure I’d be going on nights out and would drunkenly text me, it wasn’t particularly flirty at first but as time went on it progressed. Fast forward another few weeks, Howard and I happened to be in the same bar one night and he see me kissing a random guy (who, I told him, I wasn’t very interested in). I ended up going home with the random guy bla-bla-regrets-bla. Howard seemed overly interested in this though, he messaged me the next day to make sure I was okay, which I thought was strange…but then it clicked. Howard seeing me with the random guy had confirmed for him that I was gay, it’s safe to say after that moment, the amount flirty messages increased! We talked for a couple of weeks until he eventually came around my house to ‘watch a film’. He seemed comfortable, but in an over-compensating kind of way, like he sat on my bed straight away and laid back, but was careful not to get too close or make too much eye contact. These meet ups happened a few times, each progressively flirtier and more intimate, until we both had enough and just succumbed to the temptation, we kissed and he admitted to never kissing a guy before, he said it felt great and was so relieved. He also mentioned how he was hoping and praying that I was in fact gay when I first moved him in. So that was it, from then on out we were kind of inseparable, it felt as though we were obsessed with one another. I was more reserved though, Howard said he loved me after just one month together, I wasn’t so quick to admit it BUT I was hooked on the guy, I could not get enough. We both went home for Christmas break and it was the longest 3 weeks of my life, we of course spoke all day every day and he seemed lost without me. In the second week, he told his parents he was gay and he was ecstatic, he explained to me how he felt like the world had been lifted from his shoulders and he felt free. Seeing him like that confirmed that I should do the same and on New Year’s Day I told my family. I should add, both families are completely supportive and were not very shocked. We were moving forward.We returned to university and were overjoyed to see each other (best sex ever!). We went on from there as a normal happy couple, great sex, great laughs, great everything, I finally told him that I love him too. But then it hit me, everything was great when we were alone, but when we ventured out together he seemed reserved and did not want to be seen with me if he knew that his friends were about. He told me he wasn’t ready to tell his friends as he thought it would change his university dynamic, he was wrong but I thought, okay fair enough so I bit my tongue and supported him 100% (Side note: all MY friends knew we were a couple and the university is small, people would catch on…I don’t know what his plan was but it had no logic).I’m going to skip to the part where we inevitably broke up. He had become distant (making excuses not to see me), blunt and moody. It felt like he was trying to put me off. I told him we needed to chat and as hard as it was to get him to grow a pair and face the music, we did. He told me that he was sorry but he’s not happy, he felt trapped. He said he doesn’t know if this is what he wants, when I asked what the ‘this’ is that he’s referring to, he meant a relationship of course but specifically a relationship with a man. He was questioning whether he was even gay? He said his friends had been asking about me and if he was gay, he clearly panicked and maybe that’s what started this complete denial. The conversation was long, I cried, he didn’t (his egos far too big for that), I got justifiably angry and told him that he was a bastard for dragging me along and being so shut off from me. I TOLD him he is gay or at least bi, I don’t believe he can’t be after all he had done #bonersdontlie. I told him that he would do the same over and over again and that I felt sorry for him and whoever’s heart he breaks next. I told him he is never going to be happy if he carries on being so scared of what other people think.I understand the not wanting to tell friends, believe me, I’ve been there. But questioning his sexuality after all we had gone through I do not understand? Straight men don’t have sex with other men, straight men don’t flirt with other men and straight men do not have full on relationships with other men…which HE initiated by the way. My heart was broken, it still is, I’m left confused by all of it. Have I been used? Does he regret all of it, even though he said he doesn’t? Am I a complete fool for falling in love after trying so hard not to? Maybe I knew what was coming.I want to hear other stories, anybody that has been through the same. Feel free to ask questions.Thank you for reading, it felt good to just type It all out!