2015. augusztus 7., péntek

Could someone fall in love with me?

Ugh, to be honest i don't know what I'm doing here, but I guess it was necessary.My name is Andres, I'm 16 and just a few months ago I began to came out as gay to some of my friends, first I came out to the ones that I met through internet, then I began with the gay ones, the gayfriendly ones and when I felt brave enough... I came out to my mom, it was a big shock for her and she cried like crazy when I told her, making me feel even more disgusted and sad about myself. Since that, my self esteem is really really low.I'm biracial, so, my dad is black and my mom is white and I was born with a mixture of both skin tones. As I said, since I told my mom, she made me feel uncomfortable about myself and I decided to don't tell anyone else about my sexuality, to stop my coming out process. These past weeks I have decided that I want to live a happy life, the life I deserve basically, but thinking bout my future and my expectations in life I just can't stop wondering... Could someone fall in love with me? I guess that I really don't feel attractive and the fact of my skin tone makes me feel like I don't worth it. Is not that I hate my skin tone, I love it! But what I hate is the fact that just because of that maybe I will not be treated as everyone.For the majority of the black ppl is easy to love themselves bc maybe they were raised with black families and that stuff. But for me was a lil bit different, having in mind that all my family is white, with blue or green eyes, and then there is me, the one that is different to all the rest. I've dated girls before, and that increased my self esteem, but since I realized my true sexuality I just don't know if it works the same. If a guy could fall in love with you bc of your personality in a community where everything is painted in a different way.I guess I just need an advice, bc I don't know if i can resist all of this. If someone wants to talk or something contact me. And also if there's a teenager who is suffering o have suffered the same problems with his sexuality, I would love to talk, I don't have too much gay friends to relate so... Is always helpful to meet ppl like you.

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