I cant get over this. I feel triggered all the time.

I feel triggered all the time. Im 5'5 asian gay guy. I probably have body dysmorphia for not getting over this insecurity and frustration about how I look and my height. The thing is I envy young tall muscular men. Whether they are straight or gay I deeply envy them. I wonder what's their social life like. I would even hate myself if they have great personality. Im clearly frustrated because I know my body type is not the ideal and Im wasting my time because I am not living.