TIFU by unwittingly getting picked up by a gay guy…

TIFU….. This happened over the weekend. Drunk, oblivious hetero me did not realize what "come hang out" can mean..

Here's the story: Saturday I went out to the bar with my buddy & his friend. We pre-gamed pretty well: I had a 6 pack, 2 shots & 2 cocktails, & we all ate about 150mg of some really good MDMA. After about an hour we decide to walk to a bar. Actually, our original destination was a nightclub (my buddy's friends idea) but after he revealed it was gay night, we decided a bar would be more fun..

We spend the next few hours drinking, rolling & buying way too many drinks for women at the bar ( Well, I did anyways). I probably had another 5 drinks before closing, 2 Jameson on the rocks, 2 vodka red bulls, & 1 of whatever the round I bought for this girl was. Anyways, my boy leaves with some girl & his friend disappeared, so at the end of the night I find myself out front, drunk, still rolling & by myself.

I had left my bag & keys at the apartment, & was still enjoying the night so I just hung around talking to people. I met two dudes who seemed cool, we talked for a bit & after hearing that I had no idea what I was doing at that point, they invited me to come back to their dorm to hang out. Alright. I thought "why not? It's saturday, I'm partying & I haven't been in a college dorm in about 10 years" so I figure it could be fun. We hail a cab & take the 25 minute ride back to the dorm.

Upon arriving two things happen: 1.) They then decide to inform me that they don't have any money…. Okay… I guess I can cover it, night's still young & maybe it will be worth it. & then 2) We get inside & one of them immediately crashes on the couch. Hmmm, Okay.. I guess there isn't a party going on here tonight after all.

At this point the 2nd kid goes into his room for a few minutes, & comes back out with a giant grin, wearing only his boxers. Looks at me & says "WE should probably go to bed"…..

Alright, I guess I'll just sleep sitting up in this horribly uncomfortable college supplied, dorm room chair. He grumbles, the grin disappears & his whole friendly demeanor fades to one of an unhappy camper. He eats something & is off, leaving me & his passed out friend for the remainder of the night (morning).

I spend a couple hours in the chair, then manage to sleep for two on the floor, before going back to the chair & discovering the mini fridge full of crappy beer next to it. I manage to down 7 of them before people wake up, kid #1 leaves & the once-friendly kid #2 tells me I should probably find a cab back into the city. I happily oblige this time.

I just want to say, I have no issues what so ever with anyone being gay, it's just not my style..

TL/DR: Oblivious, drunk, heterosexual me doesn't realize that "wanna come hang out" can mean something completely different to an eager gay kid.