my cock says gay but my heart says straight(stay with me on this one)

sorry I don’t have much karma. had to make a new account nobody knew about.I lost my virginity to a girl on new years and I didn’t enjoy it. I knew I was bi for a really long time, and i told my friends i’m bi, but I think i’m gay now. i’m attracted to men completely. I don’t think i’m attracted to any woman.thing is though, you wouldn’t assume i’m gay by looking at me. I’m a 6 foot high school sophomore who likes to ski. what i struggle with the most is disassociating myself with emo, hair-dying, pansexual kids. at our school they think they represent all lgbt kids. and if you were to think of a gay person who goes to our school you would think of these assholes.so I feel like there’s those people, and then there’s women, who say they’re bi, but i swear they only hook up with men. essentially they (and the pan kids) label themselves for attention and i despise it. I only have respect for lgbts who are truly lgbt and not looking for attention like most of these people are.and then there’s me. a gay kid. who looks and acts like a perfectly straight kid. I want to do straight things. I don’t want to be treated any different. i don’t want attention or praise for it. it’s irrelevant. I just want to be a part of the group that i’m in. and being bi hasn’t really changed anything which is good, but i fear coming out as gay is a different story.I also feel like my dating options are limited. the only other lgbt person i know who isn’t a fake lgbt like those other kids are is my best friend and obviously i’m not gonna date my best friend. I can relate to him a little bit. he’s bi. if i was gonna date a guy I would want to date someone who’s not a hair dying pansexual emo. but tbh no man at our school fits the simple parameters of being gay or bi, without being batshit crazy. if they do exist they’re closeted.but at this point in time i’m not even actively looking for a boyfriend, just someone who can relate especially if they feel alone or if they have any advice for me.p.s. I don’t disrespect pansexual people or any sexuality or gender. I only do not respect people who utilize their sexuality for attention, or people who pretend to have a sexuality for attention. and trust me these are the people i’m talking about in the beginning