Not sexually attracted to guys, but is that the bottom line? Never been able to get close to girls and I'm just confused I guess

I could be bi, who knows. I often fantasize about having sex with girls, but I'm sure I could give a mean bj. I've always been chasing girls and if you know what a "white knight" is, I've been placed in this category in some cases, classic nice guy as it seems. I was always scared to be assertive about the sex with girls. I wouldn't bring up anything past kissing if she didn't touch my dick over the pants.I also just don't feel like I'm anything like any of my guy friends. They aren't good with girls, but they can still talk about them. I try to talk about the crushes I've had and I freeze up. I'm also incredibly aware when it's just the guys and I feel insecure that no girls came to hang, even though I'm never someone to invite girls somewhere. I guess i'm asking, does this sound like someone in denial? I'm 20 btw