In love

So hello, im 16, male obviously and gay( not out of the closet)....It has been one year since I have fallen for my best friend(i dont really know if he is gay or not), one year during which you wake up and think of one person, one year since every love story makes you cry, one year during which depression just shatters you....some people will find this rediculous, to madly love someone like that but he is everything to me, my world....so I just want to ask you redditors if you have ever been through such a situation and how did you cope? I dont really ever talked about this to anyone and I think i really had to talk bcz i cant bear it anymore, its just so painful....so thanks :)