2015. december 15., kedd

My coming out

Saturday I decided to go to a party some friends invited me to. When I arrived I noticed they had a shit ton of alcohol and they had already started drinking. I don't drink, so I just sat there. After a while they all got pretty plastered. I texted my friend (let's call her S). The other people had started smoking weed and cigarettes and acting a fool. Told S about everything that was happening and asked her if she would come to the party so I would have someone who wasn't trashed to talk to. S eventually showed up and stayed for just a bit. Whenever S left I texted her and said thanks for coming, and she replied with some witty comment. I was heading home from the party and just felt like tonight was the night I could tell her. Before tonight I felt very closeted and didn't think anything like this would ever happen. I told her I had something to tell her and that no matter what happened she couldn't tell ANYONE. She agreed and said that I could tell her anything. I told her that I was tired of having to hide who I was and how stressful and heavy it is to have nobody to talk to and keeping the secret. I told her I was gay. She didn't respond and my heart was beating out of my chest. I didn't know what was about to happen. She finally texted back and asked when I decided this (which she later clarified she meant to say know instead of decided). I told her that as soon a I broke up with my girlfriend about a year ago I finally accepted it. She said she was happy that I was finally able to tell her and that she was so happy for me. I asked her if she ever suspected I was gay and her response made me have SO much more respect and love for her. Her exact response was "No, I would never do that. Labels shouldn't exist. You should assume someone is gay because of how they walk, talk or act. " We chatted for a while later and then I finally went to bed. It's so nice that our relationship hasn't gotten weird. We are closer than ever and I really opened up. Next step is to tell my parents.Don't be discouraged to come out just because of your community. I live in the Deep South in a small town (2500 people). Homophobia is a super common occurrence.Now that I have S by my side, I am a much happier person, and feel like a ton of bricks have been lifted off my shoulders.TLDR: Came out to friend after a party, and she was completely supportive of me. Said how happy she was that I could be honest with her and it lifted tons of weight off my shoulders knowing I had someone close on my side.

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