A bit of advice

Hey guys! My first post here!I decided to seek some advice on a matter that's been messing me up recently.I met this guy when I started uni (4yrs ago) and we shortly became friends. Back then I wasn't out to anyone so it was a pure friendship. However, as time passed we got closer and closer and he told me that he is not too sure about his sexuality. He didn't give me any details, I did not say anything about myself and we just carried on. Our relationship got closer, we were together all the time, I used to sponaneously hug him until a point when we started fighting. We used to argue about everything. Smalled and stupidest stuff. This period of not really getting along lasted for about half a year, then I went away form a month and when I came back he seemed really glad to see me and our relationship improved. A couple of months down the line we started masturbating together, then each other until he freaked out and he said this will not happen again because he doesn't think it's ok. Obviously I did not like what I was hearing because I was enjoying the whole thing but there wasn't much I could do about it.A month later I started coming out to some of my closest friends, him being one of them. As I thought he was gay taking into account what happened between us and him telling me he's not too sure I told him I've got feelings for him. He said he does not feel the same way and that he's actually not gay but completely straight. Obviously I was devastated, I hit rock bottom and I was so desperate and in need of help but it felt like no one truly understood what I was going through. Through some miraculous way I managed to pull through and started to feel better but hell was not over yet. We started arguing again - he wasn't pleased that I had feelings for him. He desperately wanted me to get rid of my feelings and he even threatened to stop being friends with me if I didn't. I paniced and I said I'll do my best to stop having feelings for him. A few months down the line I told him I was over him and all was good (lie!)Time passed, our relationship improved again. We were close friends once again. We were hanging out all the time, doing pretty much everything together. Then we decided to go on a trip abroad for a week. Long story short, we got drunk one night, and he asked if I want to masturbate with him. However, that turned into anal which was not the most pleasant experience of our lives since we did not have any lube. He imediately freaked out and told me he's not doing this again. It was horrible. Again, I didn't agree but couldn't do anything about it - it was his decision. We went on as if nothing has happened.Fast forwarding almost another year, during a casual conversation he asked me if I'd be willing to try to have sex with him because he's curious how he'd feel. Stupidly, I agreed and it did not happen just once but several good times. He was definitely enjoying it now and he even admited that he might be bi.All was good and everyone was happy until a couple of weeks ago when he told me has a date with a girl and now apparently they are in a relationship (well...they've been in a relationship for a few days). Great for him, right? Well the problem is that I feel horrible. I feel so betraied and stepped on and I don't know what to do. I can't tell him anything because he's under the impression that I don't have feelings for him anymore and if I did tell him anything he'd probably freak out and since we live in the same apt, work in the same place I kinda don't want that to happen.Any advice? I don't even know what to do. I love him a lot. I'd do anything for him and my gut feeling is telling me it's a mutual thing and that I should just be patient and stick around. But for how long? It's already been a lot of time. And I can't date anyone. I've been on a date in the last weekend and it felt sooo wrong!I don't even know if he's gay/bi/straight. He's told me several times that he watches gay porn and that straight porn doesn't really float his boat. He had a couple of sexual experiences with girls that did not turn out very well: he could not finish or he could not get it up. Hell, with his last girl friend he was telling me that he wasn't getting turned on when they were kissing (they didn't get to the sex part because they broke up). I honestly don't know what to believe.Oh, and I'm thinking that the feelings are mutual because he's the most selfish person on this planet and I'm the only person with who he is not like that (unless there's a girl involved...). He does sweet stuff for me from time to time: like bring me breakfast in bed when I'm not feeling well. Or today because I was complaining that I haven't been sleeping very well he changed my bedsheets and he put a nice smelling candle in my room. Heck, at the beginning of the year we had a fight and I didn't speak with him for like a week although we were seeing each other daily to work on Uni stuff. After I decided to forgive him and he told me that it was the worst week of his life and that he felt a part of him was missing.What do you guys think should I do? Should I wait for this shenanigan with the girl to end and see what he found out about himself in the mean time? Should I just try to get out of this letting contract and move as far as possible?I tried to make him jealous a few days ago - not sure if it worked though. I went out with a guy and told him that it was amazing when it actually was horrbile. He seemed curious about it because he asked what did I do with the date, if I'm seeing the guy again.Any advice would be greatly appreciated! I'm tired of suffering and feeling so horrible! :(Thanks!