Help with a guy friend?

Hello Reddit, today I want to talk about a problem that I’ve been dealing with for a couple of years now. I have a good friend that I am madly in love with. We’ve known each other since we were young kids like 8 or 9 and even back then I felt happy when ever I saw him. I literally think about him every day and I’ve even cried over him. It’s getting to the point where it’s making me feel crazy and like a creep. I want to get over him but it’s so hard he is like my ideal guy we can be real around each other and still be silly and goofy. We always goof around and horse play so I always get mixed signals. And it’s even harder to tell because we genuinely like each other as friends. He knows I’m gay and he is str8 so I just wanna move on and try to be happy with someone else. I’ve tried talking to other people but they can’t make me happy like he does. Tell me how to find out if he has feelings for me or how I can not be so fixated on him. Thanks Reddit