I'm starting to hate being gay and a person of colour... It's a double edged sword.

Why is it that being coloured in the gay community is either discriminated against or fetishized? I know how attraction works and if you're not attracted to someone you're just not end of story. I mean personally it's fine until I can no longer pretend that being repeatedly rejected or accepted just because of my race doesn't affect me and lose my self worth because either way you're reduced down to your skin colour. Idk, it's very hard to take sometimes especially because these are the people that I'm supposed to have commonality with. Maybe I just live on an area with a terrible gay community.