Confused because of this Boy I like

Sorry for the long text! So, I have following problem: In august a boy (N.) messaged me through Grindr and we decided pretty quick to meet and go on a date. It was really nice and I began to really like him. We drove to the carnival and there we were able to make a video of ourselves, that he really wanted to have. The problem was, that two weeks later I had to go to France for at least 4 month for my studies (andof course I told himabout that). The next day he send it to me and posted it on his instagram. So as we were already texting, I told him that we could meet again if he wanted and he said, that even though he thinks that I'm a really cool guy, he doesn't think that we could be more. Scattered, but I told him that it's ok. A couple of days later I asked him if he wanted to meet and he immediately said yes, so we went out as friends (I think). When we were going through town, we met one of his friends and when she asked what he was doing there, he said "I'm on a... I'm here with a friend". It was clear that he was about to say "date". I was confused, but chose to not say anything. The same night, he reassured me, as part of our normal conversation, that we are going out just as friends (and by accident, we also met his twin-brother). That same night, when I went home, I cried my heart out, so the next day I decided to conftont him about the whole "I'm on a... (date)" thing, and he said again, that he would only see me as a friend, and that I shouldn't waste my time thinking about someone who isn't a big part of my life and probably will never be, because I said that I really like him (as in fell in love with)... But I decided that I wanted to sty friends with him. After more than a week (end of august) I went to France and after a couple of days later I wrote him to give me my french number and said to him that I we should meet when I visit home end of september/beginning of october. He did't answered at first, because he told me that he was meeting this boy (F.), but eventually said that we could meet, but only if it's not a date and if he's not too busy with work and university. Okay, I guess. Then we didn't talk for three weeks, and one week before coming back I asked him again if we could meet and he said that he still isn't sure because of university. During that week we talked quite a bit and eventually he wasn't dating that guy (F.) anymore (you can imagine how happy I was). I expected that he would say that he couldn't meet me, because he let me wait the whole week for a response regarding our "appointment". But the morning of the day that we wanted to meet he told me that he didn't want to cancel our apointment. So we met and had a really good time, talked the whole time and laughed a lot and we seemed to share a lot of opinions. We also talked about his ex and I said to him that he deserves someone better (and I had me in mind). During this time he asked if he could make a selfie of himself to send it to someone (M.) who apparently is the guy he is dating at the moment. Scattered, again, but he said he wasn't sure about him... When we said good bye, it seemed like he wanted more than a hug, he seemed confused. For the next two weeks we continued to text each other, even though I went to France again. He really opened up, and even told me things that I did'nt ask for or send me selfies, when I asked for pics of a town he visited. But it was always me playing the active part while texting. And in this time he saw M. only one time. One day, we were talking about dating again, and he really explained all his worries to me, like finding love and so on. But eventually told me that everything seems to be fine with M. although he is still unsure. At this point I felt emotionally empty. a couple of days later I was visiting home again (end of october), and asked if he wanted to do something. At first, it seemed like he had a bit of time, but then said, that he wasn't able because of his work and stuff, which he explained to me precisely. The problem is that I wanted to meet him (one last time) to set things straight, so that I could move forward or to see if he likes me too, because he acts strange. And it wasn't even that long time ago that I told him how I feel about him. And now this: I decides to follow this M. on instagram, but then decided to un-follow him, because it seemed creepy to me. And now M. is following me back and even watches my instastories. The strange part is, that I know, that M. saw the video which N. posted of our first date. Also.. I follow N. but he doesn't follow me back.Now a friend of mine thinks that everything will be alright between me and N., while others say that I should forget him, even though I feel the need to tell him again how I feel about him, that I'm in love with him. What do you think of this? what should I do?Sry for the lobg text. :P