Concerns about the Gay Community

I’m a gay man and I’m really concerened about our community. I know this might sound like a rant but I feel this needs to be said and heard. I am lonely, I’m sad, and I feel alienated. For a long time I thought it was because I wasn’t attractive, I was boring, there was something wrong with me but then I realized something. A lot of gay men feel the way I do. I scroll through dating sites and apps trying to meet someone and even in the case when I find a man that wants to talk and think I’m attractive and local he’s hesistant to date me or even hold a friendship. Why? Then I think about all my experiences with the gay community and I start to realize something. I was young just turned 18 I of course want to find other guys to talk to and immediately learn that being sexually premiscuois is the norm. I didn’t think much of it at the time because obviously everyone likes sex. I figured I would try to hook up with guys and saw it as dates thinking it would turn into more and it never did. I learned pretty fast they were just pointless hook ups. Nothing more and nothing less. There was a good chance I wouldn’t even hook up with the same person more than once let alone have a friendship or relationship. We aren’t there for younger guys, we’re not showing them the ropes and the gay scene has a lot more that someone who is young and just trying to find commpanionship can handle or is prepared for. I feel like we alienate too many gay men as well, we want them to be extremely liberal, we want them to be accepting of trans people, we want them to hate Republicans, we want them to be okay with things like abortion that are so unrealted to homosexuality it’s ridiculous. We alienate masculine gay men and some of us claim they are self hating or that they should enjoy drag races. We tell them that if they want a relationship the norm is an open relationship, triads, polygamy. There is nothing wrong with wanting to hook up or be in those sorts of relationships but it does alienate men that want monogamy. Think about all the gay men who are born in to ultra conservative families who are taught that gays are wonton, that they’re evil, that it’s impossible for two people of the same sex to love eachother and when they seek the community instead of offering them guadiance and support they’re seeing this, it’s enough to convince them that they have to live their lives in the closet. I’ve read articles that gay men aee turning to drug use, we’re spreading HIV and other STD’s with wreckless sex and orgies because we’re lonely, we’re depressed and these are the only ways for some of us to be able to connect with other men. I’m not saying people should stop having sex and being sex positive or to be monogamous or masculine. But we need a place for us that isn’t sexual where we can help eachother and be there for eachother regarldess of political views, what they want from a relaitionship, what they’re interested in, and not to take advantage of naivety. We need to be kind to eachother and open. We should try to seek relationships and friendships out with each other. I’m sorry if this comes off a preachy I just beg you guys at least be nice to eachother, try to watch out for eacother. Mayeb try to show people the ropes of interacting with gay men what the slang means and what to watch out for. If you read all of this thank you.