Gay sex is hard

Feels like I'm in a bit of an odd situation but there's probably an obvious answer that I'm not seeing. I'm 27 and have been with my bf for almost a year now, I'm no stranger to sex whatsoever but I feel like for some reason my sex drive isn't what it used to be?To give some background we live 1.5-2 hrs from one another so we only get to have sex once or twice on the weekends (it completely varies on what plans we make and how horny we both are). And since I'm usually pretty horny during the week I jerk off almost once a day during the week. I'm also roughly 50/50 vers. I wouldn't say I lean more top or bottom either way because there's times I want to bottom more and times I want to be top more. It also depends on my bf and the dynamic we have. And with my current bf he's definitely more of a top, which I knew going into the relationship and have accepted that I'm mostly the bottom. One way that we remedy this is by having a semi-open relationship. Once in a blue moon we give one another a free pass to have a NSA (safe of course) hook-up with someone else, we just have to show each other who the potential hook up is and we're allowed to veto if we want. I've only taken advantage of this twice so far (to satisfy whenever I want to be top) and he's taken advantage of it 5 times.Anyways, for some reason lately I've been having issues with both bottoming and topping. I feel like it takes longer and longer for me to finish when I top, and its been awhile since I have. I usually take too long and then have to stop and just finish myself off. With bottoming I feel like its become more painful for me. My bf doesn't have a huge dick (he's average) but it seems like my stamina has gone down? The last several times we've tried having sex it doesnt last as long as it used to, not cause I'm bored but because it gets too painful and I tell him he needs to pull out. I try to relax as best as I can but maybe I'm focusing too much on the pain and not adjusting to it as well as I used to when I was younger.I don't really know. Seeing if anyone has any advice. I know jerking off less is a start to solve issues with topping but not sure what else would help as far as bottoming goes.