I lost my gay best friend. I don’t know what to do.

My best friend of 20 years confessed to me that he is gay and is in love with me. I’m straight, married with two children. I told him I’m fine with him being gay but he wants to touch my body. He was begging and crying and even willing to pay me. I said NO. That’s when he said he needs to go away because being with me makes him fall in love with me more. This all happened 6 months ago and we haven’t talked/seen each other since. He’s very fun to be with. We have the same hobbies and used to go skiing every winter and tennis every summer. I miss him for the sports and laughter, friendship.Do you think it’s wise for me to call him or should I wait for him to make first contact (I don’t think he ever will). Do you think time heals or our friendship is over? I don’t know how to move on; it’s like my brother died.