Feeling uncomfortable with my sexuality, after years of already being out

I'm an 18 year old male, who identifies as a cis-gendered homosexual. I've been aware of my sexuality since I started going through puberty (13-14 years old), and came out from the get-go. When I first started "expressing" myself, I was as flamboyant as possible; now, I've become a lot more comfortable with myself in what might be considered a hetro-normal personality. I'm extremely grateful to have lived and grown in a generally accepting environment, and have never had to endure anything greater than dormant homophobia or middle-school teasing.I've also always been more than comfortable with the actual, sexual aspects of my identity; yet, lately those aspects have seemed really (for lack of a better term) wrong to me. I've been sporadically but still active sexually since realizing I was gay, and upon turning 18 I felt comfortable enough to start putting myself out there. Now though, just a couple months later, it just seems to me that gay sex is more demeaning than pleasurable.I've never defined my roles in sex, and have been open and accepting to a lot of stuff, but now I can't get the idea of being submissive as synonymous to being used. Every time I try to watch porn or have sex, or even just think about it, all I see is a hierarchy between roles. This has caused me to not only not want to take on a submissive role, but not be dominant as well, in fear of perpetrating this idea. Obviously there's not enough information for anyone to really shed light on an exact cause for why this is happening, but doing research on my own, I've started to consider that maybe I was abused as a child, and have blocked it out of my memory (I have a couple memories of semi-sexual encounters in childhood, but only with other kids, and only more anatomy/curiosity based than sexual).(TL;DR: been out for 5 years, suddenly starting to see gay sex as demeaning and uncomfortable out of nowhere, thinking I might have oppressed feelings of abuse)Is this a possible reason? I don't want to fabricate something to try to make sense out of my behavior, but with the symptoms I've expressed here, would it be considerable? Any advice on what to do, where to go with it if it could be, or how to be comfortable at the time being with sex would be really appreciated. Thanks - e