Is it time to grow up and start being a man?

Even though we should be whole humans in and of ourselves, we still crave the intimacy and romance that another human can give. Because of this desire we want to do everything possible to achieve what we wish. That was my short philosophical introduction to one thing that really is something that occupies my mind. I'm feminine. Not overwhelmingly feminine, but I'm the type of guy who everyone guesses is gay because of flimsy character. I'm the youngest sibling as well, so I have this young and childish take on life I feel. What I am attracted to is masculinity, strength and wisdom. However I feel now many times I've met guys that have met my criterias and create in my the lovely feels that should be there, but it has been mostly one-sided, at least after a month. I feel as I should change, grow up and become a man. As I feel they would've felt the same or stayed if I was more of a man the way they were. Of course non has said that, but I feel the truth is implied. I know masculinity is a sore topic for some gay men, but I think it's important to visit and discuss. Can we become more manly? Grow up and put aside childish things like femininity. Or have I just not met the right guy, and all those past guys were not good at communicating the mismatch in personality, but instead gave of a vibe of you're too much of a girl. Lay out your thoughts, experiences etc. I would love to hear from all of you, masc, fem, and everyone in between!