So, I almost had sex with a boy, but couldn't get hard and basically ruined it!

First off, I'm a gay man, in case that wasn't clear.

So, I got pretty drunk on Friday night, but went to a Shisha bar with friends for ~3 hours and I felt tipsy at most, not as drunk as before. Went back to a friends house because I was crashing there, and so was 4 other people, one of them a boy who I had made out with before but that was it.

He's sleeping in a room alone and I'm not. He tells me "Come later in the night". I'm a virgin so I get really fucking nervous, even start shaking, even though I'm tired as hell. And I'm not hard at all.

Eventually I come over, we make out, I'm still not hard. I start sucking him off, I'm still not hard. He starts sucking me off, I get half hard, at best. It felt good but I wasn't erect. I can tell he wanted me to top him. But he's hard and I'm not. So I'm just like "Okay just fuck me" (Don't worry we had condoms). So he tries to unsuccessfully shove his penis into me, a virgin, and it doesn't work at all, I think this guy is purely a bottom and knows nothing about penetrating. He was kind of rubbing it around there, I think he was too big and I was just too tight. He couldn't get it in, we get frustrated and I see if I could get hard and fuck him, nope. I just couldn't. This whole ordeal lasted like 15 minutes probably. I felt really bad that he couldn't get off at all, so I sucked him off and he came in my mouth, and I swallowed. STILL not hard. I said good night and went to sleep.

What is wrong with me? I feel like I couldn't get hard because of the fact that I masturbate by humping my bed, or I masturbate too much, or because I was still kind of drunk.

It turns me on to think of what we did, so why wasn't I turned on when it happened? The last time I made out with him I was half erect pretty much the whole time. This is the second time this has happened, with the same boy, why?