2016. március 17., csütörtök

Seeking advice. My boyfriend lacks intellectual curiosity. And I am uncomfortable with boredom. What should we do?

Hi Reddit,I really need your help. And i know this is long but if you are curious about all the details, here goes:I am a gay man (31) who has been in an 18 month relationship with a 26 year-old. On paper, he is everything I could hope for. He’s sexy, professionally driven, and a talented artist who absolutely adores me. More than once have I thought he’s the one. More than once have I been surprised to find that the act of “falling in love” with him wasn’t actually over yet as I continued, over the weeks and months, to have deeper and deeper feelings for him. We have good sex, good communication, and I feel honored that I’ve been able to share my whole self with him, even my dark parts. He accepts and loves me for who I am, which has never happened to me before.The underlining issue that we keep circling back to in increasingly frequent loops is that I have a strong aversion to boredom. For me, life is a Supermarket Sweep where you only have a limited amount of time to put as many experiences and ideas into your cart before the buzzer sounds. This attitude has given rise to a craving for novelty. I love to read, travel, and learn new things — and I loathe stasis to the point that I tend not to last long in relationships nor jobs nor cities before my need to do something new overwhelms me and I upend my life for another adventure.My boyfriend, on the other hand, prefers stability and, if we’re being honest, lacks intellectual curiosity. So wherein past relationships, I would spend my nights talking with my partner about books and debating the news, my nights these days are filled with a lot of screen time and not nearly enough stimulating conversation. He literally doesn’t own a book.I know I have two choices — dump the guy or join a book club without him. And I also know that I’m flawed and will have to lose the wanderlust if I have any hope of being in an LTR whether or not this keeps going. And I also feel like I have to love people for who they are, not who I want them to be. And I do love him. I just don’t know what to do.TL;DR: 18 mo relationship. I love him but I crave novelty and hate boredom. He loves me but lacks intellectual curiosity and doesn't share my interests. What should I do?

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