Being gay or not!

Hello guys and girls. I am 17 year teenager living kind of normal life with good friends and idiots too but that's not the problem. I understand what being gay means and like other men means. I really like men and really easy get horny from men and specially bearded men but again that's not the problem. I've always have imagined my life like having wife and kids but I can't hide that I don't like women , I don't know what to do to have wife and kids and be kind of disappointed but at the same time making my family proud or live my gay life and be with man of my dreams and again I think I will disappoint my family. I don't know.... Really confused .... !