Low Self Esteem

Hello reddit. Well, where do I start. I'm 22 y.o. guy from Russia, graduating from university next year. As you have already learnt from the title -- I have significant problems with my selfesteem, and it's been so as long as I can remeber. This problem with my selfesteem ruins almost every aspekt of my everday life -- from making calls to doing groceries. I had to give up three jobs because I couldnt handle talking to customers and clients. Somehow I know that to a certain degree this problem derives from that internal homophobia that I used to feel towards myself back in the past. But again, only to a certain degree -- this feeling is now gone.I came out to myself about a year ago, and never tried to find a relationship because of both a low selfesteem and a fear of being rejected. It seems to me now like im stuck in this miserable loop, and it's going to last forever. Unfortuantely, finding therapist is not an option for me at the moment, so I would like to know if there are any gay men or women who experienced the same thing? What should I possibly do to finally get a healthy selfesteem and start living my social life?