I need to vent to the universe

My senior year of high school I was 250 lbs. A crush at the time made a fat joke and that was it. I starved myself for fifty pounds by the end of the year. I didn't starve that whole time obviously but I tried everything. Before this embarrassing moment, I stole diet pills from Walmart (lol), tried but not really tried working out, it seemed like nothing really worked. My senior year I started using adderall, I was prescribed tho, and I barely ate. I would starve myself for two-three days at a time and eat small meals after for 24 hours.I was down to 200lbs by the time I started college. I remember thinking that I could finally be myself and meet other gay people since I hadn't known any in the small town I was born into. I met one guy whom I found a mutual attraction too. He was tall, skinny, geeky, starting a small computers business, had his own place and a trust fund from his parents to help him start his computer business, a redhead and bi. He's also pale which idk why but I like that too. I just thought I hit the jackpot. I mean doesn't he sound nice. His favorite pokemon was ghastly which should have been a red flag but whatever I'm open minded, not quick to judge. He was the first guy to walk me to my car after the LGBT meetings on campus and the only guy (thus far) to ever kiss my forehead which for some reason immensely stood out to me. It was very sweet and innocent and idk I just thought it was everything. I always liked the subtle acts of affection like that. Anyway, long story short I got into a fight with army roommates, he picked me up and we slept together that night. Next LGBT meeting he's telling everyone and snickering and pointing at me I never went back.Years later, this past September I went on my first date. It was amazing. He asked me out again before the date was over and then said he lost interest days later. I don't get it. Do I have a reputation or something as someone to walk over? It seems like any outlet in which I feel I should belong or feel accepted, they're so harsh! I finally was able to be around gay men and interact and where I thought I'd have some sense of community, I'm always on the outs. Low moment but out of curiosity when I was bigger in high school I joined a chubby chaser site lol. I wasn't getting much attention on any other so I just decided to try that. I was too skinny...like really?! I cannot catch a break! Im always in that gray area. I'm rambling and this is longer than I wanted but the reason I'm posting this is because the first date guy who lost interest? Guess who he is now dating? Computer guy, thank you Facebook stalking...I mean gimme a break universe.