Am I perverted for fantasizing about being raped?

I often fantasize about being raped, usually by multiple guys. The thought of this always gets me extremely aroused. I often see situations like this on shows like Law and Order SVU (like the episode where the 3 frat guys rape the sorority girl) and I can’t help but imagine myself being the victim. Let me say I know rape is a disgusting, horrible thing that is never enjoyable. I am also not condoning rape and I am not here to offend anyone who has been raped. But this has been my biggest fantasy since I’ve become sexually active. I’ve gone as far as having “rape role play” sex with my ex. And even having “date rape role play” sex with my ex and another friend where we filmed the encounter. I acted as if I was passed out and they dragged me in and took turns on my seemingly limp body. I often imagine multiple guys raping me and even 2 guys being inside me at the same time. Like a spitroast type thing. These fantasies often include me being tied up and even beaten up as well. I am gay so I’m not so twisted straight guy but I’m just wondering how weird this truly is. I can admit that I’m a weird person in the bedroom, but I’m wondering if anyone else has thoughts like this or if I’m just a perverted person. Please don’t be mean. At least I’m man enough to admit that I know I’m weird and this might be perverted. Have any of y’all had these thoughts yourself?