Help a friend!

Hey so recently I've been on this sub quite a lot and I know that these types of posts are probably annoying but I just need some advice.I'm 19 now and since I was like 14 or 15 I've had these cycles I guess would be the best way to describe them. Where the opposite sex would disgust me and I could only watch gay porn and only think about guys. However, once I "finished" I would have this sense of guilt or something I don't know what. And then a few weeks later I would again be attracted to females, but guys could still turn me on, even if a little lessOnce I turned 18 I got a Grindr and wanted to hook up with a guy and find out once and for all but I'm far too nervous to go through with it, I feel like I'll regret it. I downloaded and deleted the app more than like 100 times lol.Should I just pony up and go for it?? I'm sorry for the wall of text but I would super duper appreciate any advice, and would like to hear some of your experiences. Thanks y'all!!