My life so far. Also, help.

I've been debating posting this for around 3 months now, and am currently in one of those 'midnight can't sleep because I'm stressing over stupid shit' moods, so I'm sorry if this is convoluted and hard to follow.So I've known I was 'different' basically as long as I can remember; running to my neighbor's house at 3 years old to play Ballerina in her basement for the entire day (it was fantastic mind you). But I didn't realize I was gay until maybe 10 or 11.I've grown up in a very small, conservative town in southern Pennsylvania and I immediately knew I couldn't tell anyone. It just felt wrong, as if this giant beautiful blanket that was my childhood​ was ripped off of some disgusting, malformed truth about myself that I absolutely hated.At 13 I was in a pretty horrible place. I've always been really quiet, so no one really noticed or cared. Not that I had friends who would have noticed or cared anyway. I contemplated suicide daily, thinking of what way I would prefer to go out without letting my parents find out, as if even they wouldn't notice.I knew that these terrible thoughts I was having weren't healthy, and I really needed to change something. But I didn't want to get better, I honestly felt like this was my punishment for being gay and that this was how I was going to spend the rest of my life.Then I saw one of Tyler Oakley's videos on YouTube, and he was nothing like how I thought gay people were, or were supposed to be. I slowly came out of my depression and began making friends after probably 3-4 years of just being 'that quiet kid who doesn't talk'.Flashforward to my freshman year of high school, I had a lot of friends, none of which I would ever consider coming out to, but that didn't matter because I more of began coming out to myself. Forcing myself to accept that this is who I am. I still had, and have, periods were the thought that being gay is wrong. I remember making this massive list of around 175 reasons why I shouldn't come out during study hall, and I sort of lived by it for a while. Later that year, I told myself that I was going to come out to my friend that summer. But I made sure it was someone I wouldn't mind losing, but knows me really well, and if I didn't do it I was going to kill myself (WHICH SOUNDS ABSOLUTE RIDICULOUS ATM OF TYPING THIS, probably because it is). Well, when you didn't have friends for the 4 years prior to this happening, I didn't have many options.As expected, I didn't tell him. We were camping, and right before bed (more like 3 am) I told him that I had something to tell him, but I couldn't say it. So we went to bed. I still haven't said "I'm gay" out loud, which would probably help.Sophomore year went great, and I'm planning on actually coming out this summer, to the same person, and I've realized I am not prepared at all. He, and everyone else I know, is very conservative, Christian, and probably doesn't have the best view of gay people. But he is definitely my best bet for maintaining sanity. How do I tell him? Everyone always says "You'll know the right time". Well, it's been 14 years and I'm tired of waiting.Side statement + question: My parents are very homophobic. My mother was raised Jehovah's​ Witness, and father Catholic (say what you will). I've recently noticed that I'm sort of pushing them away without realizing it, if that makes sense. I don't know, preparing for the worst I guess. How could I possibly come out to them, without being kicked out? Or would it be better to wait until I'm independent, which may be very hard if I come out to friends now because my mom works as a teacher at my highschool.This is really long, and very unnecessary, I'm sorry.