Questions about first time gay sex as a straight male.

not looking for judgements really. It's just something I need to try. I pictured anal sex being very enjoyable since I enjoy having my butthole rubbed by girls while they blow me.. everytime I cum nowadays my butthole just clenches everytime I cum and I just crave to have something in there.. so what I'm asking is it as awesome as I picture it? I can see myself cumming just by being fucked but maybe it's just my wishful thinking. I can't picture me dating or kissing a guy, or doing anything romantic. Just giving head while he rubs my ass and then being fucked lol. thoughts please.